As a matter of both policy and custom, the title of these Pearls each day has nothing to do with what is inside; that is a deliberate act on my part, from the early days of Pearling, when I made the decision to not connect the title and text. This decision, of course, gave me license to make up titles out of my head, willy-nilly, without being constrained by the subject matter…. If you watch my titles closely, you will have noted this quality, I’m sure, as they are ALWAYS a bit strange, and (almost) never have anything to do, directly, with the text of the blog…. Oh, once in a Blue Moon, the title will reflect some part of the body subject, but, 99.99% of them are not connected, at all, at all…
Today, of course, is one of the exceptions, at least in the sense that the title makes sense, AND is connected to the material inside… indirectly, but, connected…. Any who, I just wanted to clear that up, as it sometimes will confuse the Gentle Reader, especially the newbies, who are not yet accustomed to the idiosyncrasies that abound on this site… Well, there was that…. plus, it got me this far down the page, without ever suffering any angst, or upset at not having anything to put here…. Bonus!….
Of course, NOW I’m stuck with it, at this painfully awkward point, where I again try to come up with something more than just nonsense to get this started…. Now, I know that nonsense is useful, and is well-used around here, for sure…. but, somehow, it just doesn’t seem appropriate this morning…. I haven’t a clue as to why that may be; it’s not as if nonsense isn’t well-known in this venue. Maybe I’m being too stringent this morning; that has been known to happen, especially before I’ve sucked down enough coffee…. If that were actually the case, though, I probably would have found a body or two on the way to my chair….
I don’t know, ffolkes…. it all seems so futile some mornings…. I write, and write, and spout off about stuff that should be important to many people, yet, nothing changes out in the BBR, not in any significant way…. If I weren’t so damn concerned about the state of the world, and about how long that world is going to last, I wouldn’t be writing at all… I’d be traveling, and making sure I see all those places on this beautiful old planet I’ve always wished to see, before it is all sent down the proverbial tubes by our common stupidity, inflicting upon us the near-certain species extinction we have courted with our ignorance, an event that is now all-but-unavoidable, according to all the evidence….
Well, that was fun…. NOT!
Having thus put myself into a semi-deep depressive state with that mild diatribe, I think I’d better get on with today’s Pearl…. I’m not certain exactly how I got myself to this point so quickly…. I didn’t start out to be so depressive, or feel such a depth of futility…. but, within five paragraphs, I managed to kill any good mood I had going, from having slept fairly well for the third day in a row…. I think, in fact, I’m going to forgo any further attempts to rant, or be serious…. I feel more like having fun today, so, from this point forward, there will be no further ranting allowed…. Instead, we’ll go seek out some fun….. gigoid-style……
That means, of course, that y’all will need to make sure your seat belts are well-secured, and that all of the provided safety devices are deployed (that includes the Kevlar vests, and the emergency stash of Valium included in the first aid kits…. In fact, if I were you, I’d just swallow the Valium now….); we’ve been known to use ALL of them on such days as this… and THAT includes the transgender disguises….
Oh, stop worrying; usually we only need to use about half the included protective devices; it’s not as if we seek out those carnivorous predators…. It’s just that they live nearby, and have learned the signs that we are going to be there, thus giving them ample warning to plan surprises for us….
But, not to worry, nobody has ever died on one of our nonsensical quests for a lightened spirit; it’s come close a few times, but, those were the times we had a replacement pilot, who didn’t know all the ropes…. Also, this is all a load of crap, so, all you really need is your earplugs, to be able to ignore the tour guides spiel when it gets tiring, or actively boring… a state of affairs that this intro is approaching rapidly…. Hmm, maybe we should go for a dive…. In fact, I believe that is becoming imperative….
Shall we Pearl?….
Be not concerned with right and wrong.
The conflict between right and wrong
Is the sickness of the mind.
Since this Pearl, and these pearls, are dedicated to fun stuff, here is something I found yesterday on a random mouse-click, an interactive web site that is really neat…. and that phrase just gave everyone a big clue as to my age, I’m sure…. Any who, here is a link to the site, so, check it out, and enjoy… then we’ll go into an old-school pearl with parameters set to nonsense, or, funny, or whatever SB thinks might fit in with those concepts….
Really cool website and picture from a project completed by NASA, with the help of the people of the world…. ….. http://www.gigapan.com/gigapans/155294
“I resolved no to be offended easily by human nature, but I think I blew it.” — Hobbes
“The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than the fact that a drunken man is happier than a sober one. The happiness of credulity is a cheap and dangerous quality.”– George Bernard Shaw
“Puritanism — The haunting fear that someone, somewhere, may be happy.” — H. L. Mencken
(Well, I think it’s funny….)
“Although war is cruel and brutal, it is also dangerous and stupid.” — Yakko Warner
(I know, marginally funny…. but, it stays, because it’s all-too-true…)
Brutha: “What could I say?”
Om: “Believe in the Great God Om.”
Brutha: “And then what?”
Om: “What do you mean, and then what?”
Brutha: “…Believe in the Great God Om or be stricken with thunderbolts.”
Om: “Sounds good to me.”
– How to be a prophet (Terry Pratchett, “Small Gods”)
AND NOW ANOTHER WORD FROM THE PENTAGON: “Oh, and by the way… about those 45,000 body-bags we had shipped to Saudi Arabia. They’re actually going to be used to smuggle booze in to our troops; otherwise we couldn’t get it to them. Honest. We’re not really sure what we’ll carry back in them though. Any ideas?” — Daniel Bowen’s TOXIC CUSTARPEDIA.
Lister: Love is what separates us from animals.
Rimmer: No, Lister — what separates us from animals is that we don’t use our tongues to clean our own genitals.
– Red Dwarf – ‘Confidence and Paranoia’
Okay, well, that was…. well, that was…. okay, I have no idea what that was…. I thought it was funny, though, so, it will have to do for now…. Let’s go on, & see what happens…..
When one wishes for light hearted poetry, Ogden Nash, or Shel Silverstein will always come through for you…. But, I’m going to go with one of my own today, just because I can…. I’ll try to make it as light-hearted as I can…. In fact, I’ll try twice, as one is really short….
Madness comes and goes, it’s true,
whenever it chooses to do so.
Living’s much like wearing a shoe,
when all you are is a toe.
~~ gigoid ~~
Roses for Noses
I have a bozoid personality, of the first degree;
nobody, I mean nobody, knows that better than me.
I often wonder, as the world goes around, and around
how many others have realized just what I’ve found….
I know for a fact, I’m not the only bozoid one;
too many people laughing out there, having fun.
Is their laughter, though, at themselves first?
Or is it some other impulse, like purple liverwurst?….
I’ve always loved to make others laugh and giggle,
since my tender youth, when my ears began to wiggle.
The world is full of humor, but not always easy to find
so laughing at myself I learned never to mind….
We bozos know each other, here, there, and everywhere
there’s no hiding such joy, it just wouldn’t be fair.
We all have one feature, our great bulbous nose,
and there’s no doubt at all, cuz it just grows….
There’s nothing like a good, big mistake, a disaster,
to show us the folly of living life faster and faster.
Nothing in the world can ever take the place,
of seeing in the mirror, a happy, smiling face….
Don’t be shy, just let it all hang out;
we bozos have more fun, there’s no doubt.
Life’s too somber and gray if we let it get on top
if we don’t stay loose, the pain won’t ever stop….
My advice to all of you, out there in the world,
let noses grow round & red, keep hair tightly curled.
Find a way to let your spirit out often to play,
you’ll never once regret any price you pay.
~~ gigoid ~~
I found this the other day, and put it here…. without any clue it would be perfectly appropriate for the day’s theme… (which is because I don’t generally have a theme….)…. Any who, it fits right in, so, it can stay, too…. By the date, this was written just before leaving on our trip to Alaska, so, I must have been in a pretty good mood, if a bit hyper…. not an unusual state for me, at least, not in my head….
I confess to feeling too hyped to write…. I have a lot in there that wants to come out, but, a bigger part of me just wants to dance, or fall asleep to pass the time until we leave, tomorrow in the early afternoon….. So, I’ll cheat again, and dip into the archives…. This is a short little piece I wrote the day before Halloween in 2011, as part of a pearl created using a really old format, one that encouraged ranting a bit too much…. History aside, I like this one, just because, and it’s a good one to finish with on a day like today…..
“His philosophy was a mixture of three famous schools: the Cynics, the Stoics and the Epicureans – and summed up all three of them in his famous phrase, ‘You can’t trust any bugger further than you can throw him, and there’s nothing you can do about it, so let’s have a drink.'” — Terry Pratchett, ‘Small Gods’
Laughter is probably my favorite part of Life; I can’t think of a single time in my life when laughter was unwelcome. Conversely, I can think of any number of times when it was not only welcome, but life-saving, or at the very least life-preserving. In its way, it also affirms life; it lets you know that you are alive, and that life is good.
The sound of a child’s laughter can bring a smile to the grimmest curmudgeon, and the laughter of a beautiful woman can be either joyous, or cruel. Laughing is our best defense against the tyranny of repressive thought; it can bring a tyrant to his knees, for tyranny lives in fear of ridicule. Laughter cannot cure pain, but can ease it, and make it more bearable.
In its way, laughter prolongs life, actually reversing many of the effects of time. When laughter is in our lives, everything is more colorful; vision, hearing, touch, smell, all are more acute when under its influence. And, when it is long absent, the world turns dreary, washed of all color. Without laughter, our lives become drudgery, merely a time to survive, in silence and despair.
The Universe is one huge joke, and the punch line has yet to come. We can spend our lives in black and white, trudging along the dusty road of Time with head hanging down and steps heavy as sorrow. Or, we can look for the brighter side of Life, and laugh at ourselves and everything around us, marching ahead with eyes up and seeking new vistas, hopeful for the dawn of each new day.
“Excuse me, but didn’t I tell you there’s NO HOPE for the survival of OFFSET PRINTING?” — Zippy the Pinhead
I’m not sure what to think about this one; it FEELS as if it got away from me, but, it LOOKS okay…. Maybe I’ll read it, to see how it came through the ordeal…. Be back in a few….
Okay, so, it must be okay, because I’ve read it, and STILL don’t have a clue as to its value, or even its nature…. which makes it completely typical…. That, of course, means I’m outta here, having done all the damage I can do for one day…. See ya, ffolkes….
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…
When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.
Which is Why….
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
I just sits.
gigoid the dubious