Looks to be ’bout half-a-bubble off plumb….


Bogus, man! Somebody turned off my clock, or something…. I’d suspect Murphy’s hand at work, but, all I did is get up about an hour and a bit late…. It’s almost 6:30 AM, later, by a bunch, than I’ve been up in a coon’s age, (Okay, I’ll bite: How long does a raccoon live?….), an event not so negative, as much as inconveniently confusing. As much as possible, I’m not going to push for any real thinking, or decision-making, until after the first cup of the morning’s transfusion of blood has dripped into my veins; I have the distinct impression the results would be disastrous, at minimum….

How, then, do I manage to create an intro to this Pearl? If I can’t use my brain, what the heck is it good for? No, you don’t really have to answer that rhetorical question, any more than I have to consider it; I know what it’s good for. I just never get a chance to use it for that…. For what, you ask? Well, honestly, it’s best if I don’t tell you, as it could create difficulties further down the road, for both of us…. Given what I might end up doing the last few months of my life (whether those months are this year, or part of another one, a few years away….), it’s best if you don’t have any idea of my intentions, or my plans…. You wouldn’t be safe, and that would go against the grain of my sensibilities….

Since clandestine actions have been relegated far into the future, relatively speaking, we can get on with today’s effort, provided I can figure out some way to get this intro a bit further along…. I know, it’s probably enough as it is…. Hell, maybe you’re right, and it IS enough…. I know it’s not up to the usual standards we hold, in terms of the amount of crap you generally find here, but, I think the degree of sheer inanity gives it some extra panache, if you know what I mean…. I mean, I could have gone back to those stupid one line jokes I’ve been using here…. Hmm, maybe that’s the problem…. Smart Bee seems to LIKE the damn jokes, so maybe it WANTS the little conversational one-line rim shots I’ve been putting up there… go figure….

Well, okay then…. I don’t have any of the four line rim shots, but, here’s a really old joke, from a British comedian, recently passed away, whose body of work was referred to me by a Gentle Reader as a source for old one-liners…. It’s such an old joke, I had to give it a good dusting off before using it….

“Two cannibals were eating a clown – one said to the other, ‘Does he taste funny to you?’ ” — Tommy Cooper

As a male human being, I am now allowed to guffaw, or, at the very least, give a sardonic smirk for the irony…. You can do as you wish, in terms of your reaction; this site is completely influence free in that regard, as far as we can make it…. It is however, still somewhat strange, all in all, for which we have no apologies whatsoever…. In fact, if I can feel that what I’ve done here has added to the amount and quality of strange in the world, then I’ve done what I set out to do….

Shall we Pearl?…..

“The best and most beautiful things in the world cannot be seen or even touched.  They must be felt within the heart.” — Helen Keller

So, having arisen so late in the day, I have to admit, I’m completely discombobulated (I LOVE that word!…) (Well, I don’t love the feeling of being in the state of discombobulation (   :-)   ), but, the word itself is GRAND, isn’t it?….)….. Where was I? Oh, okay… So, I’m up late, my brain is mush, and a Pearl is required… What’s a boy to do but dive into the archives for something at least partially intelligent, or something that at least sounds that way….

Here, then, is a fairly mellow politirant, with a suggestion, not original to me, (the credit for the idea expressed below belongs to Arthur C. Clarke, from an idea he had in his novel, “Imperial Earth”, set in the year 2776, on the one thousand year anniversary of the signing of the Declaration of Independence), for how to deal with the issue of corrupt politicians, or, indeed, how to deal with the whole idea of a professional class of politicians…. I think its a great idea, and completely workable…. Of course, none of the politicians we have now would like it, but, hey, that’s the whole problem, right? Right….

Any who, enjoy the rant, and think about the suggestion… I forgot to write down what day this was posted, but, it had to have been post-November 6, 2012, as it speaks about the election on that date….

Wednesday, 2012:

“Integrity is when what you say, what you do, what you think, and who you ARE all come from the same place.” — Madelyn Griffith-Haynie

Okay, I know we are all probably sick to death of politics, and the election, and everyone would like to have a break from talking and thinking about it…. I know I am. So, I’ll try to make this fairly short, and make it the last political diatribe for at least a day or two. It may be possible, if nothing in the news jumps up to stimulate my outrage (which may be on a short vacation itself…. I hope….. I could do with the emotional space….).

Any who…. here is what I was thinking when I came across this little gem…. What if we devised a test, that in some way would enable us, as voters, to determine the relative status of each of the candidates according to this rule? A way, as it were, to measure their degree of integrity, which is something I think we can all agree would be a good thing to see in a politician, unlikely as it may be to find it there; I don’t believe it occurs naturally…. If we could, say, set up a scale of integrity, and make it law that a person had to score in the top 5% of the scale in order to merely be eligible for office, I think we might see a whole new set of politicians, who had never before been seen in public.

In fact, in thinking about the current crop of those currently ensconced in the houses of government, it is entirely possible that ALL of those elected officials, who are now in office, might not be eligible under that restriction…. I am not excluding the President, out of fairness, though I personally believe he might score in the top 10%…. I still have questions about some of the stuff he has signed that didn’t seem to be very well publicized, as they didn’t exactly fit with his projected image…. The newest version of the Patriot Act, the NDAA, that he signed last New Year’s Day comes immediately to mind….

I don’t care if he did try to mitigate some of the deleterious effects of the law, he still signed the damn thing, thereby seriously endangering a number of the first 10 Amendments to the Constitution. Plus, the method he used to keep it from the public awareness was rather suspect, in my mind, and reminiscent of the old days under Nixon, Johnson, Reagan, and the two Shrubs, may they all rot in whatever level of  Hell they are destined to occupy…. (I know, I know…. not being a Christian, that curse has little weight, but, hey, it’s a pretty clear indicator of my opinion of all of them….)

As I suspected it might, this grew to be somewhat more than I intended it to be, so I’ll cut it short here. But, my suggestion above, about the test for integrity that should be a given for political aspirants, is completely serious, and I wanted to get that out. Maybe by the next election, we can get the rest of the country to buy into it…. which should be interesting, and fun. I’ll be looking forward to the expressions on the faces of all the supporters of those now in office, when their people gloriously fail to pass the test…. and to the results it will have on society, should it ever be adopted…. I don’t see any way at all that it could do anything that wouldn’t improve the situation….

And so I penned
It down, until at last it came to be,
For length and breadth, the bigness which you see.

– John Bunyan (1628-1688) — Pilgrim’s Progress, Apology for his Book

I wrote this poem as an expression of thanks, for the friend(s) I have in my life, friends who wouldn’t let me go under, in those times when I was sinking….

Unsolicited Gratitude
Fear becomes familiar when reality bodes us ill
pain assumes first position, no matter our will.
Powerless, we founder, no strength to prevail
anguished and afraid, against unwanted Fate we rail.

Still, a grain of hope deep inside, hidden well against need
gives us reason to survive, our starving souls to feed.
Failure of courage burdens time, of being bested,
until our souls, in submission, become foully infested.

Bitter tears wash through us each day, with little care,
no thought, no feeling, no wish, or need to be fair.
Rendered clueless, confusion falls upon us, as prey,
we surrender a piece of our soul, little as we may.

Yet, always, a bright beam of hope is seen from afar,
no matter how dreary, or dark, it may seem where we are.
None knows, nor would consent to tell, it seems
from whence it hails, or why it so brightly gleams.

Saving our sanity, absolving our unwanted fears,
dispelling the myths and lies that come with the years.
Each man has known the precious gift that hope may give
And gives glad thanks, as long as he may live.

~~ gigoid ~~


The following old-school variety will be a unique pearl, put together using a method of timing and selection heretofore untried…. I’m not even sure of my ability to describe exactly what parameters I’ll be setting, as the search for these connected aphorisms has taken place on three separate occasions, none of which were related in any elemental way…. I guess what I’m trying to say is, I have no idea how this will turn out, but, usually, when we try new techniques like this, it seems to work out pretty well, so, I’m confident this will do the same…. Enjoy!..

“The doctrine that the earth is neither the center of the universe nor immovable, but moves even with a daily rotation, is absurd, and both philosophically and theologically false, and at the least an error of faith.” — Roman Congregation decision against Galileo

“To command the professors of astronomy to confute their own observations is to enjoin an impossibility, for it is to command them not to see what they do see, and not to understand what they do understand, and to find what they do not discover.”– Galileo Galilei (1564-1642)

“Kids, the seven basic food groups are GUM, PUFF PASTRY, PIZZA, PESTICIDES, ANTIBIOTICS, NUTRA-SWEET and MILK DUDS!!” — Zippy the Pinhead

Okay! That, I think, will give you a clearer idea of where we are headed with this, so, make sure you’re safety harnesses are fully fastened, and you are hanging on for dear life to the soft, fluffy stuffed animals provided by your friendly flight attendants…. Hang on, ffolkes, these last four could get rambunctious….

“All riches come from iniquity, and unless one has lost, another cannot gain.  Hence that common opinion seems to be very true, “the rich man is unjust, or the heir to an unjust one.” Opulence is always the result of theft, if not committed by the actual possessor, than by his predecessor.” — St. Jerome (340?-420)

“Heroes as great have died, and yet shall fall.” — Alexander Pope (1688-1744) — The Iliad of Homer, Book xv, Line 157

“The human race, to which so many of my readers belong, has been playing at children’s games from the beginning, and will probably do it till the end, which is a nuisance for the few people who grow up. And one of the games which it is most attached is called, “Keep tomorrow dark,” and which is also named (by the rustics in Shropshire, I have no doubt) “Cheat the Prophet.” The players listen very carefully and respectfully to all that the clever men have to say about what is to happen in the next generation. The players then wait until all the clever men are dead, and bury them nicely. Then they go and do something else. That is all. For a race of simple tastes, however, it is great fun.” — Gilbert K. Chesterton (1874-1936)

“History is a lie commonly agreed upon.” — Nietzsche

I rest my case…..

“These things are fun, and fun is good.” — Dr. Seuss

Ted was right, you know, about all of it…. (Ted = Theodore Geisel, Dr. Seuss….). Especially this part…. I don’t know about y’all, but I had fun today…. which is odd, as it started out really badly, and seemingly went downhill from there…. I guess my topographical perception is as skewed as the remainder of my mind’s now dubious qualities…. In looking back over what I’ve done here this morning, I can only agree with that assessment, and will now fade quickly into the background, disappearing right before your eyes…. See ya….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest  Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.



A sample vortex coalesced on the stairs….

A day passes, one seemingly identical to another, over the course of a long life. Yet from one day to the next the entire world may turn upside down, leaving us to scramble for the nearest point to hold on for dear life, or fall, jumbled and tumbled around with the rest of our lives.

Five days ago, I was content and comfortable. Now, I am anxious and on edge, and will be until I can find another place to live…. Yep, that’s right, I got the ol’ 30 day notice a few days ago, and must find another lodging, as this one is being foreclosed by the lien-holder, no doubt some fat cat banker who doesn’t care that 6 people now must rearrange their entire existence in the space of one month. Just another typical tale of the 21st century here in America, as the economy continues its self-destruction right before our eyes….

It may be a product of my youth, but I hate to move. When my dad was in the Army, before I was 10, we moved every few years, to wherever the Army sent him, in their commonly capricious manner. By the age of 10, I had lived in California (two army bases, and two towns), Washington (Fort Lewis), and Japan for seven months. My older siblings had, prior to my birth, also lived in Georgia and, I believe, Texas. It is an adventure, to be sure, to move a family of four to seven people and all their belongings, from one end of California to another, or, just as likely, from one coast to another. An adventure that I, and my siblings, found to be a major pain, after the initial rush of excitement.

So, once more, I have to find a place, negotiate to get in, then box up all I own, and find somebody to transport it to the new place for me, as I can no longer do the lifting myself. Piece o’cake, right? Riiiiiight…. NOT!  I’m already bummed out about it, and now must find a way to motivate myself to not procrastinate…. otherwise I’ll be staring at the end of the month with no place to go….

Ah, me, Life is such a joy, is it not?…. Murphy has obviously been planning this one for a while, and is, no doubt, hovering around somewhere, laughing his ass off at the idea of the poor old fool and his meager possessions being on the street, even if only for a short time…. it’s all funny to him….

Ah, the hell with it, I’m going diving. Want to come along? Let’s go find some pearls, and create today’s Pearl……

On Monday, when the sun is hot,
I wonder to myself a lot;
‘Now is it true, or is it not,
‘That what is which and which is what?’

“On Tuesday, when it hails and snows,
The feeling on me grows and grows
That hardly anybody knows
If those are these or these are those.”

“On Wednesday, when the sky is blue,
And I have nothing else to do,
I sometimes wonder if it’s true
That who is what and what is who.”

– A.A. Milne, Winnie The Pooh

Winnie seems to have been channeling the future for Dr. Seuss, and has hit the perfect note of nonsensical sense. Much of this little poem could conceivably have been included in “Horton Hears a Hoo”, or “A Cat in a Hat” (I may have gotten the titles wrong; it’s been a while since I read the good doctor’s books….)

Regardless, I like this little poem a lot, as it expresses so well how all of us feel at times…. at least, those of us who remember to let out our inner child on a regular basis…. It is unfortunate that many folks read this, and dismiss it as being “childish”, and not suitable for adult consideration… for they are losing out on experiencing a completely different side of reality than the one they normally inhabit…. and as Willie Wonka said, “A little nonsense now and then, is cherished by the wisest men.”….. Yes, indeed it is…..

“The advocates of the pornography victims compensation bill seem to think that if we stop showing rape in movies people will stop committing it in real life. Anthropologists call this ‘magical thinking’. It’s the same impulse that makes people stick pins in voodoo dolls, hoping to cripple an enemy.  It feels logical, but it does not work.” — New York Times Article

This is propaganda, in its worst form…… First, it is presented as a legitimate article with the attached charismatic factor of being published in (gasp!) the New York Times. If it’s in there, it must be true, right?…. Bullshit. The Times gets it wrong just as often as the National Enquirer; remember a few years back when one of their most popular reporters was busted for making up all his stories, for years? One would do well to always remember to believe only about 25% of what is read, and only then if you know of corroborating information…. otherwise, you are bound to eventually be disappointed in your trust…..

Second, it makes an assertion that is completely false, in order to ridicule the supporters of the legislation they are  opposing. I have no doubt this was written by a male, and that he very likely misogynistic. He first accuses the supporters of the pornography victims compensation bill of sloppy, wishful thinking, which he claims is called ‘magical thinking’ by (gasp!) Anthropologists (whom we all know to be the Final Authority when it comes to labeling the parts of society…) According to the author of the article, “it feels logical, but it does not work.”  Hmph. I suppose he has already tried it himself. And, of course, we can consider him an expert on what is logical, because, by golly, he said so….

This is typical propaganda, written to pull the unwary into feeling a kinship with the author. The author makes statements, and claims, that sound pretty bad, in a way that says to the readers, “hey, look, you and me, we’re different than this poor fool!”, and calls on experts, who in reality are, a) not experts and b) didn’t, and wouldn’t, necessarily say what they are claimed to have said….. In reality, Anthropologists would probably agree that movies DO have an effect on societal behavior, and CAN help stop this kind of issue, because it ceases to glorify, and make acceptable, actions that are evil and completely derogatory to women.

If it is made illegal to ban showing rape in movies, it WILL help stop such behavior in society. How can it be considered wrong to rape, when movies glorify it, often showing it as a natural result of the WOMAN’s actions, that inflamed the man beyond his ability to control, thus making her responsible for being raped? How can it be illegal to rape, and yet be legal to show rape in movies? THAT is what doesn’t make sense, unless one accepts the lie that movies don’t affect behavior.

Banning the filming of rape, or any other sexual crime, (of which there are more than enough examples in real life), is NOT THE SAME as “magical thinking”. Nor is it the same as “voodoo” believers’ beliefs in unprovable principles. Rape is NOT a subject for films, especially when they glorify it, as being something natural. It is only natural to misogynists and sexual predators; normal men do not feel like watching a rape for entertainment purposes.

This statement, and the article, are typical of the kind of lies that those who perpetrate the sex slave trafficking in women and children of both sexes. They couch their lies in logical, dispassionate terminology, and quote societal experts to support their lies with scientific proof.

The simple truth is that these men are animals, sexual predators of the worst kind, and their only interest is in continuing the ongoing slavery of millions of women who have been trapped into a life of prostitution, and brainwashed into feeling that they are nothing, worth only what their bodies can be sold for, and forced to be raped on a daily basis….. and the general public doesn’t seem to care….
    The whole issue is a hot button for me. I start crying, like now, every time I think of the pain and anguish that is felt by these women who are nothing more than slaves to their male animal masters. I am ashamed of my gender, and of my species, for allowing this kind of activity to not only persist, but to assume some kind of acceptance by society at large.

Supposedly enlightened people talk about “victimless crimes” and as above, they spout off about “magical thinking” to distract the general public into believing the issue is not a problem; these enlightened IDIOTS are fools, and can be considered to be in the same category as those who deliberately pursue this kind of activity, by default….

Next time you read some article supporting the sex trade, remember that for every ONE woman who voluntarily enters the business of selling themselves for sex, there are, easily, a MILLION women who are not given any choice in the matter, who suffer daily beatings and rapes, and who are treated as if they are cattle, with no rights and no hope of change….

But, there is hope, if they are fortunate; there are women who, by dint of their own strength, and their own will to be free, have successfully exited the business. And those women are carrying their message to a thus-far indifferent public; they are on blogs all over the world, telling their experiences of being slaves, and showing the way to set themselves free…. 

So far, these voices are a mere drop in a bucket, and will remain so, as long as articles like the one above continue to make their ridiculously dangerous, pseudo-logical arguments to an unwitting public, and the public continues to accept the lies….

But then, the American public is pretty good at accepting lies, aren’t they?……

And, finally, we will use some Art to disguise this last Pearl…. these three photos, all found on Facebook, shall act as this morning’s political commentary…. enjoy!
    I think that will serve to make my point…. if not, well, just think on it a while, and it will come to you….

And so we come to the end of another day’s effort…. So be it. I’m not even going to go back and edit, beyond checking for typos…. So, y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you….

Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.




It won’t help save the parameters….

Starting cold isn’t hard on just engines; it doesn’t seem to be doing a lot for my brain, either. So much for theory…. back to the drawing board…. Maybe if I look under here… no, nothing. There’s nothing lying about I can use, and nothing fictional or philosophical is formulating, that I can see. This could prove to be a frustrating experience, if I can’t come up with something pretty soon; the natives are restless, and I may have to leave mid-Pearl. Hmm, let’s see what happens when I do this….You  may want to cover your ears….

Well, that wasn’t so bad, now, was it? I had assumed that there would be more of a fuss forthcoming, but that was quite restrained, all in all. One would think that it would be a bit more of a struggle to empty one’s own mental pockets, but it went very smoothly, if not exactly fruitfully. Perhaps that explains the lack of interest in fighting for what was found, as it wasn’t much, to be sure. In fact, nothing was found, and that is a bit unsettling, as I had no idea I was so short on material…. not even an old cliche to examine. Pretty sad….

Is this schizoid paranoia or just existential blues? — Smart Bee

I think perhaps I’d best just dive in and begin the search for pearls in Smart Bee; it looks like that is my last, best hope for this morning’s salvation. We can only hope at this point…. shall we Pearl?…..

“To be, or not to be: that is the question: whether ‘t is nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, or to take arms against a sea of troubles, and by opposing end them? To die: to sleep: No more; and by a sleep to say we end the heartache and the thousand natural shocks that flesh is heir to,–‘t is a consummation devoutly to be wish’d. To die, to sleep; to sleep: perchance to dream: ay, there ‘s the rub: for in that sleep of death what dreams may come, when we have shuffled off this mortal coil, must give us pause: there ‘s the respect that makes calamity of so long life; For who would bear the whips and scorns of time, the oppressor’s wrong, the proud man’s contumely, the pangs of despised love, the law’s delay, the insolence of office and the spurns that patient merit of the unworthy takes, when he himself might his quietus make with a bare bodkin? who would fardels to grunt and sweat under a weary life, but that the dread of something after death, the undiscover’d country from whose bourn no traveller returns, puzzles the will and makes us rather bear those ills we have than fly to others that we know not of? Thus conscience does make cowards of us all; and thus the native hue of resolution is sicklied o’er with the pale cast of thought, and enterprises of great pith and moment with this regard their currents turn awry, and lose the name of action.” — William Shakespeare (1564-1616), Hamlet — Act iii, Sc. 1

This passage is probably the most quoted paragraph in history, generally trotted out when some ambitious actor wants to impress a director with his memory for script, or else when some English professor is trying to impress some cute undergraduate. This morning I took the time to apply my own doubt to my theory about Shakespeare (which, as I’ve shown previously, is solidly negative….), by reading the above passage with an open mind…. Or, as open as I can get it, given my already formed opinion of his work….

I found this to be, as Will’s work often is, rather obscure in its meaning. Sure, it flows nicely, and the way he structures his phrases is certainly lyrical sounding when spoken aloud. But, to me, the difficulty in following the thread of thought that the soliloquy sews detracts from that lyrical quality, by forcing the observer to work too hard at understanding the meaning of the words…. To me, this is a flaw in a play; it deflects one from being entertained by making the audience work at comprehending the actor’s lines….

Second, I found this obscurity to also take away from the power of what otherwise might be a stirring speech. Instead, it merely comes off as depressive, and whiny. “For who would bear the whips and scorns of time,” sounds a bit like a complaint to me, and is less than attractive in a Prince, to be sure…..

I guess the English have always enjoyed a bit of crazy in their princes and kings, eh what?…. I suppose in that sense, Will nailed Hamlet’s character on the head…. but, that doesn’t mean I have to like it…. and I don’t….  To my mind, even after this examination, Shakespeare remains the most over-rated author of all time…. And as further proof that even he knew it, from the same play…

“T’is as easy as lying.” — William Shakespeare (1564-1616), Hamlet — Act iii, Sc. 2

Nice to see the formalities being observed…. educating new recruits is an important detail….

(Photo found on Facebook…)

“By doubting we come at truth.” — Cicero

Warm eyes, wet lips
Gently touch my finger tips

Soft sighs, silky hair
Longing for me to touch her there

Her begging eyes
Her whimpering cries

Urgent needs of one so sweet
Bring me quickly to my feet

The night is warm, there is no doubt
It’s my turn to take the dog out.
— Smart Bee

“All true knowledge contradicts common sense.” — Smart Bee

This is an old school pearl, after a fashion. Raise your hand if you get the point…. well, okay, don’t. But, if you did, well, you get it, right? Right. So, I don’t have to write a thousand words here to try to tell you, which is probably fortunate for both of us.

There is a point, you know, but, it’s not one that bears any great significance in real terms; I’m just feeling a bit lazy today, and it’s easier than spending another half-hour chasing down something about which to rant. I’ll just leave you with this thought…..

“The storm starts when drops start dropping. When the drops stop dropping then the storm starts stopping.”  — Dr Suess

I can only wish there was a way to get rich on the concept of unpredictability…. Well, there probably is, but I haven’t heard of such, precisely, though there are numerous theories of which I’ve read. If nothing else, it might help me organize my own existence in such a way as to take advantage of the rapidity with which the Universe presents its manifestations of mutability. Since I don’t know of any such process, I’ll have to settle for the ability to create a paragraph like this, totally meaningless in relation to the task at hand, other than to reflect the confusion and lack of cohesive thought currently on display here…. which makes it accurate, if nothing else…

That being said, to little purpose, I will draw this to a close, thus giving the universe the opportunity to heave its normal sigh of relief, and get on with the day…. Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you….

Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.