Bashing myself repeatedly in the forehead probably isn’t the most productive way to begin the day, even if I am using the old paddle instead of the new one…. The available alternatives, however, seem to leave something to be desired, consisting of a choice between self-flagellation with a cat-o-nine tails, or suicide by immolation….
Neither of those choices gives me a warm fuzzy, and forehead bashing gets old quickly, so I should most likely try to avoid that, too, I guess. It’s hard to know what to do when I’m still half-asleep, but I’m pretty certain I wouldn’t like any of the choices I seem to have this morning…. more’s the pity……
I can see your furrowed brow, there, wondering about why on earth these nasty events are even part of today’s agenda…. Before your face gets stuck like that, I’ll tell you that all three of the described activities are fictional…. That’s right, I made it up, in a blatant attempt for sympathy, first thing…. Why, you ask?
Well, I don’t know, it just seemed like the right thing to do. I don’t have any real introductory remarks, and the template I’ve been using seems to be losing me readers by the bucket full…. Well, maybe it’s that, or it could be something else, but my readership seems to be dwindling, while the number of followers keeps rising…. Statistics drive me crazy, which is why I don’t often pay attention to them….
I have noted, though, some puzzling aspects to the numbers that are shown, and can’t figure out, for the life of me, how to view the numbers I see for this blog. It’s all good, though, as I figured out some time ago, it doesn’t matter to me at all if nobody ever reads what I write. It’s nice to have ffolkes read it, and if it stimulates thought, or a comment, I’m happy….
But, the main reason I write is to clean out my head each day, of all the stuff that otherwise would sit in there and go bad, and end up giving me indigestion, or, worse, mental constipation, a fate worse than death, to me…. Come to think of it, it’s not pretty, so you’d most likely not enjoy it either….
I see that I’ve whined and complained my way through to another legal-sized introductory section, even though the content has little or nothing to do with proper literature….. It’s all just filler…. A sack of sand, as it were, put here to bolster the false image being projected, of a caring, erudite old fart who loves to paint pictures with words…. Well, I guess it’s not a false image, so much as a wishful one…. and, regardless of which kind it is, we’ve gotten far enough to give it a shove into the deep end….. In other words….. Shall we Pearl?…..
I had originally intended to rant a while this morning, but Smart Bee had other ideas. This seven star pearl is presented at the behest of SB, who shoved each of them under my nose, without bothering to tell me why it should be included. As I look the group over, though, it came out pretty well, as some good advice on how to live, and how not to live…. or, as we are fond of saying down at the club, “Just the fax, ma’am”….. enjoy! Memorization of the quotes is encouraged, but, please, no flash pictures; it frightens the Ooompa Loompas……
Those who know others are intelligent
Those who know themselves have insight
Those who master others have force
Those who master themselves have strength.
Those who know what is enough are wealthy
Those who persevere have direction
Those who maintain their position endure
And those who die and yet do not perish, live on.
– Lao Tze
“Often when he was looking on at auctions he would say, “How many things there are which I do not need!”
– Diogenes Laertius (c. 200 AD) — Socrates, x
Thou, silent form, doth tease us out of thought
As doth eternity: Cold Pastoral!
– John Keats (1795-1821) — Ode on a Grecian Urn
“I maintain there is much more wonder in science than in pseudoscience. And in addition, to whatever measure this term has any meaning, science has the additional virtue, and it is not an inconsiderable one, of being true.” — Carl Sagan, The Burden Of Skepticism, — The Skeptical Inquirer, Vol. 12, Fall 87
“The faster you go, the shorter you are” — Albert Einstein (1879-1955)
Fill your bowl to the brim and it will spill.
Keep sharpening your knife and it will blunt.
Chase after money and security and your heart will never unclench.
Care about people’s approval and you will be their prisoner.
Do your work, then step back.
The only path to serenity.
– Tao Te Ching
“If you don’t like yourself, you can’t like other people.” — Robert Heinlein, Time Enough for Love
It’s been a whole month of not reading very much of other people’s poetry, and I’m glad to be able to get back to whatever I want in this section… I think I strained my brain writing poems on a deadline, and I missed the daily dose of genius…. So, here is today’s pick, from another of my favorite poets…..
Said the little boy, “Sometimes I drop my spoon.”
Said the old man, “I do that too.”
The little boy whispered, “I wet my pants.”
“I do that too,” laughed the little old man.
Said the little boy, “I often cry.”
The old man nodded, “So do I.”
“But worst of all,” said the boy, “it seems
Grown-ups don’t pay attention to me.”
And he felt the warmth of a wrinkled old hand.
“I know what you mean,” said the little old man.
~~ Shel Silverstein ~~
“Don’t hit me!! I’m in the Twilight Zone!!!” — Zippy the Pinhead
I don’t know why Zippy so often is able to pinpoint the way I’m feeling, or what I’ve been thinking about, and give it expression in a way that anyone can understand. I’m very much feeling like I’m in the Zone these days, as I try to fill up the hours with productive things, hopefully, with a dual effect…. One, it will help me check another item off the list for my upcoming trip, and two, it will take my mind off the number of days until I leave….
“Yow! I’m having a quadraphonic sensation of two winos alone in a steel mill!” — Zippy the Pinhead
I am both excited, and a bit anxious, about the trip. It will be a fulfillment of a life-long dream, and is coming at a time that is at once convenient, and at the same time, inconvenient. The inconvenient part has to do with the lady I asked to go with me, who has another commitment next month, and still needs to get her passport, as well. She’s already started that process, so she’ll be able to go next trip, which I am planning for later this year…..
“I’m using my X-RAY VISION to obtain a rare glimpse of the INNER WORKINGS of this POTATO!!” — Zippy the Pinhead
So, this time, I’m scouting out the territory, and getting an overview, to mark down the sights I’d like to see when I will have more time for sightseeing in Ireland… This trip will give me several days in London, then the rest on a cruise ship, with day excursions in the port cities we’ll stop to visit…. Since I am also interested in the countryside in Eire, I’ll have to go back to see more of it than I will on this cruise…. But, on this cruise, I should be able to get a lot of good pictures of the sights in the cities we’ll be touring, which include Le Havre/Paris, Dublin, Cobh, Liverpool,Glasgow, Belfast, and a couple others…
“Why is it that when you DIE, you can’t take your HOME ENTERTAINMENT CENTER with you??” — Zippy the Pinhead
I just LOVE the way Zippy brings us right back to reality, by asking the tough questions, those thorny philosophical queries that wake us up in the middle of the night, like this one…. Why CAN’T we take our video boxes with us? What’s up with that?….
It’s stuff like this that keeps me from buying into the whole Heaven/Hell controversy….. none of what either side has to say really makes any sense, so what’s the point? It’s like Bob Heinlein had one of his characters say…. “There is no real, compelling evidence that there is life after death. There is also no compelling evidence there is not. Soon enough, you will know, so why fret about it?”
It is this kind of practical, sensible reasoning that will help me get through this agonizing period until I get to hit the road…. Well, that and my lady’s sweet kiss…..
“.. ich bin in einem dusenjet ins jahr 53 vor chr… ich lande im antiken Rom… einige gladiatoren spielen scrabble… ich rieche PIZZA…” — Zippy the Pinhead
Translation: “I’m in a (jet plane?) in 53 BC… I’ve landed in ancient Rome… Some gladiators are playing scrabble… I’m ordering Pizza….” Zippy the Pinhead
I guess, what I’m trying to say here is…. Ooooh, shiny! I’ll be going now, out into the Big Blue Room, to pass some more time, however I can….
“.. I’m IMAGINING a sensuous GIRAFFE, CAVORTING in the BACK ROOM of a KOSHER DELI –” — Zippy the Pinhead
If you are still with me, I commend you for your patience, and your willingness to undergo extreme hardship to reach the end of today’s effort, which it was…. effortful, that is…. Any who, I’m done, so let’s see if it floats…. Hmm…. I guess I’ve seen worse…. It’s all spelled right, anyway….. It will have to do, because I’m NOT doing it over…. Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you…..
When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.
Which is Why….
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
I just sits.