I believe I’m suffering a universal page fault in my brain…. I’m not entirely sure exactly what that is, but, I know when I see it on my computer screen, it’s a bad thing, and that’s what we have here, for sure and for certain….. a bad thing. Not unusual, not surprising, but bad…. Still, my heart beats in my chest, and my breath continues to go in and out of my lungs, so, I suppose I’d best get on with this….
I’m burnt…. baked, fried, sautéed, grilled, whichever method you choose, I’m way overdone….. I know it. The symptoms have been obvious for days now, but, I’ve been unwilling to admit it, or them, because I don’t know what I’ll do if I can’t write…. Talk about diffuse anxiety! This is more of a specific anxiety, actually, one that strikes every time I suffer one of these burn-out periods…. Not only is my brain having a hard time deciding what to write about (which, if you stop to think about it, is nothing new….), but, actively resists making the choice, knowing that it will have to try to fulfill whatever it is I’ve come up with, one way or another… Of late, it seems to have been more another, than it has been one way…
Whatever THAT means…. I guess my vaulting ambition, to write more and better, has finally reached an end point, and my creativity, such as it is, is in active rebellion, at having to come up with yet another set of outstanding verses and/or phrases, to whet your appetite for more…. I am having a hard time finding the angst and outrage I need to rant, and my sleep patterns are getting so regular, my brain is getting fuzzy from sleeping so much (which really is NOT a complaint, just an observation…. better to sleep too much than too little, for sure….) In the past nearly three years, I’ve written so much that I may have inadvertently emptied out my bucket of creative ideas, before it has had a chance to refill from the well…..
This blankness in my head obviously doesn’t stop me from writing about nothing much; that seems to have been a skill I’ve perfected, or at least, gotten adept at using…. observe, if you will, these three-plus paragraphs of meandering blather, which has just poured out, once the subject, or, in this case, the lack thereof, was decided upon. I don’t seem to have a problem writing, once I know what I’m writing about…. it’s the figuring out part that is getting harder all the time. I’ve used, and re-used, and used again, every subject known to man, and a few he’d rather forget. My ranting seems to be getting to the point where everything I write sounds familiar, with good reason, as I’ve said it all before….
This is why you’ve seen more old-school pearls lately…. Old-school pearls, by the nature of their construction process, are always relatively fresh. The subjects chosen are often self-directed, in that I have no plan ahead of time about which quotes I will choose, only a vague idea of an area of study to head for, in a general way. The software program I use, Smart Bee, is random enough that every time is different, and the only difficult part is not repeating oneself in terms of those quotes that are chosen, which is fairly simple for someone with a good memory, such as myself…. In essence, pearls of virtual wisdom are easy money, for a writer; the process resembles walking down the beach and picking out the prettiest sea shells to take home….
Ah well, another intro spent wandering around the back corridors of my mind, looking at the artwork and wondering at the massive spaces filled with nothing much…. much like these paragraphs…. I’m not sure what I’m going to do about my burn-out, but, it is all moot, because my internet service company has gone belly up, thanks to one of the telecom giants hogging resources (long story), and I’ll be losing my internet service at home for a time…. I’m not sure if I will keep posting daily, or not…. we’ll have to see. But, if you don’t see a post for several days, hang in there, I will return eventually… It may not be until after my upcoming move to another house, but, I will be back, hopefully with new resolve, and new material….
Shall we Pearl, while we can?…..
Random, old-school, harlequin pearl…. the best kind….
“The day is the same length as anything that is the same length as it.” — Lewis Carroll
The melancholy joy of evils past:
For he who much has suffer’d, much will know.
— Alexander Pope (1688-1744) — The Odyssey of Homer, Book xv, Line 434
“We find it hard to believe that other people’s thoughts are as silly as our own.” — James Harvey Robinson
HUMAN — The human being either evolved from the biologically very similar ape, or was created along with the rest of the world in a six-day creative spurt by an anonymous god. The human body is a wonderful thing. Well, most of them are. Humans have one mouth and a limited number of genitals, which is probably just as well. — Daniel Bowen’s TOXIC CUSTARPEDIA
“Intelligence has much less practical application than you’d think.” — Scott Adams, Dilbert.
“Nothing can be created from nothing.” Lucretius (55 BC)
“A man that should call everything by its right name would hardly pass the streets without being knocked down as a Common Enemy.” — Lord Halifax
As advertised, the best kind…. It took a bit longer than I planned on, but, this came out very well, and, to my way of looking at things, it even came out less obscure than is commonly true… Well, it’s clear to me, anyway, and hopefully, if you let it percolate, it will become clear to you as well…. If not, well, hmm… too bad?…..
“Universe: All-purpose poem.” — Ray Hand
A thing of beauty is a joy for ever:
Its lovliness increases; it will never
Pass into nothingness; but still will keep
A bower quiet for us, and a sleep
Full of sweet dreams, and health, and quiet breathing.
Therefore, on every morrow, are we wreathing
A flowery band to bind us to the earth,
Spite of despondence, of the inhuman dearth
Of noble natures, of the gloomy days,
Of all the unhealthy and o’er-darkn’d ways
Made for our searching: yes, in spite of all,
Some shape of beauty moves away the pall
From our dark spirits. Such the sun, the moon,
Trees old and young, sprouting a shady boon
For simple sheep; and such are daffodils
With the green world they live in; and clear rills
That for themselves a cooling covert make
‘Gainst the hot season; the mid-forest brake,
Rich with a sprinkling of fair musk-rose blooms:
And such too is the grandeur of the dooms
We have imagined for the mighty dead;
An endless fountain of immortal drink,
Pouring unto us from the heaven’s brink.
~~ John Keats ~~
I figure, since I’m being somewhat obfuscatory today, I’d cheat a little, and go with an old school pearl from the archives…. this one is from the old days, when I was still employed by the State of California, and sent these morning pearls out to about 300 or so of my peers, for their daily, morning dose of reality, right there in their inbox each day…. This one is apparently from somewhere around 2008….
Out of the East…
“Interesting” is only the beginning. As humans, we tend to get bored when not stimulated by a challenge of some sort. If the world does not provide one, we are perfectly okay with making it up. Something about the perversity of human nature, I suppose, though it seems a bit dramatic to me. Ah well, our’s is not to reason why, etc., except it is, or should be, do and die, not do or die. Cuz that’s what is at the end of the road for all of us. Kinda puts us on the same playing field, eh? Here…. I’m feeling less than Occidental this morning……
“Character is doing the right thing when nobody’s looking.There are too many people who think that the only thing that’s right is to get by, and the only thing that’s wrong is to get caught.” — J. C. Watts
Always we hope
Someone else has the answer
Some other place will be better
Some other time it will all work out.
This is it.
No one else has the answer
No other place will be better
And it has already turned out.
At the center of your being
You have the answer;
You know who you are and what you want.
There is no need to turn outside
For better seeing.
Rather abide at the center of your being
For the more you leave it
The less you learn.
Search your own heart and see
the way to do is to be.
— Lao Tzu
Y’all take care out there…..
Considering the relative rush job this Pearl constitutes, I’m impressed. It’s a bit choppy, but hangs together pretty well, for something I cobbled together in about 90 minutes time. What I related regarding my internet connection was truth, so this may be my last post, until I figure out what I’ll do about service, since I’ll be moving in about 31 days… oh, joy…. Any who, for now, this will do, even if not Pulitzer material…. Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you….
When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.
Which is Why….
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
I just sits.