Avoiding those odd “Elvis” moments….


It is not without a certain degree of trepidation that I come to this decision; no one at all could ever consider taking such a step without thinking about what might happen, if things do not go as planned. If things don’t work out as hoped, the carnage will be extensive, and the world, as we know it, will never be the same…. Contrarily, if what I am contemplating works as it should, no one will ever know they were mere seconds from annihilation, destined to exit this plane of existence, not with a bang, but with the poet’s whimper….

On the other hand, I could quit fooling around, and tell you that all of the above is just another silly collection of words, put together in such a way as to draw your attention, and engage your mind in some sort of fictional scenario, with no real connection to reality…. How’d I do? I don’t know about y’all, but I was completely fooled….. and I was the one writing it! Now, THAT’S some powerful writing!….. Just kidding, ffolkes….. I’m fully aware of how my pomposity, my arrogance, my regular and harsh criticism of religion and its icons, and my so-far-left-I’m-right political positions, have a tendency, no doubt, to make people uncomfortable, or, at the very least, leave them with feelings of guilt, which nobody cares for at all….

The guilt, if I’ve done my job correctly, comes from knowing that we, the American people at large, are responsible for the mess we are in, due to our long-term habit of putting our head in the sand every four years, and voting for yet another batch of lying, cheating, immoral assholes, establishing them in their elected positions, where they will proceed, like every other politician in the last 100 years, to fuck things up beyond all belief….. Sometimes, I think that what they studied in college was not law, but bozoid technology….. how to make best use of those tools we all employ at one time or another to make fools of ourselves…..

What is THIS all about? Good question…. Over the last couple of days, I’ve been looking back at all I’ve written in the last couple of years, since beginning this blog, and I realized that I’ve been beating a horse so dead, it’s petrified, and has been erected as a statue in the local park…. I’ve ranted and railed against the machine, belittling the churches and their deliberately delusional perpetrators, and accused ALL politicians of psychopathic greed, not to mention congenital prevarication….

I’ve pointed out the lies that the politicians tell us, either by omission, or by commission, and bemoaned the entitlement and arrogance of the para-military police forces that most of our towns and cities have espoused…. All to little purpose, and littler effect, as it turns out, as the same people keep on screwing us over in the same old ways…. I don’t know about y’all, but I’m getting a bit tired of putting out so much effort to such small effect; I’m accustomed to my work having some kind of positive outcome, but, it’s hard to call the response I’ve had as being overwhelmingly so….

While it’s true that most of the ffolkes who do comment here tend to agree with my take on matters, it is also true that, even given the 315 followers I reportedly have, the number of people who SEE it isn’t exactly what can be called a huge audience…. Now, that’s okay, in one respect, which is, I don’t care about the numbers, very much…. I write to get this stuff out of my head before it rots, not for the usual purpose of stimulating action in the public; it’s always been more about saving my sanity than it has about saving society….

BUT…. and it’s a big BUT…. saving society wouldn’t be such a bad thing, now, would it? It would be nice if I could tell myself that what I say here has some positive effect in that direction, even if I wasn’t telling the entire truth…. SIGH…. As a curmudgeon, though, and as a self-made, self-taught, self-reliant philosopher, no matter how much better it would make me feel, I can’t do that, because it just isn’t true….. If we don’t stick to the truth, it’s all just an exercise in futility, and we may as well just go lay down in our graves now….

So, anyway, I see now that this has turned into not merely a rant in the intro, but has become what seems to be a series of personal revelations about the relevance of what I’m doing here…. Though I don’t really care about how many ffolkes read this, as it is written for another purpose altogether, there is another part of me that would like to have the world pay attention to what I’m saying, for their own benefit…. It’s a bit frustrating, and that frustration may prompt some radical changes around here, in how I approach the entire subject of ranting….

If I can make it more effective, I’d be willing to put more effort into publicizing it, to get more ffolkes to read and spread it around…. I’d even be willing to take more meds, so I could spend more time reading and commenting on other blogs (which I would LOVE to be able to do, but for the pain it causes me physically…), so that my readership would continue to grow, to a level that had some real power of distribution….. Ah well, it’s all just speculation, at this point, so, we’ll just have to see how it goes…. but, expect SOME changes, for sure…. I’m just not certain what form they’ll take, or how it may affect the rest of what I write, but, I HAVE to do SOMETHING, or I’ll drive myself crazy…. which, I admit, is not a long drive…

Shall we Pearl?…..

“Don’t take the bull by the horns, take him by the tail; then you can let go when you want to.” — Josh Billings

(Trivia note: This statement is a more effective method of animal husbandry than is first apparent, which only strengthens its metaphorical nature…. As any farm boy knows, you can’t persuade a large animal to go anywhere by putting a  rope around its neck, and yanking on it, especially large animals such as cattle, or mules, or donkeys, of either gender; they’re all quite stubborn, and stupid, to boot. However, any and all of these animals will go wherever you wish them to go, if you will merely grab them by the tail, with a good strong grip, and give it a firm twist…. Guaranteed, the animal will move IMMEDIATELY, and briskly, in whatever direction they were pointed at the time the tail was twisted….   🙂    )

“Ignorance is temporary. Stupidity lasts forever!!!” — Smart Bee

A few days ago, in the news, one of the Republican Senators, John McCain, took some heavy shots at a freshman Republican Senator, some guy named Cruz, a desperately confused young Latino, for his useless, and even harmful, use of a filibuster-like speech to delay a vote that was going to happen anyway…. It was actually kind of cute, the way they bickered over the issue, and provides a perfect example of how, even amongst themselves, these psychopathic idiots cannot figure out how removed they are from real life, or how little all their contortions have any positive effect on the public… They all just look like little kids, running around getting mad over trivial stuff, and never getting anything done that would benefit anyone other than themselves….

“He probably just wants to take over my CELLS and then EXPLODE  inside me like a BARREL of runny CHOPPED LIVER!  Or maybe he’d like to PSYCHOLOGICALLY TERRORIZE ME until I have no objection to a RIGHT-WING MILITARY TAKEOVER of my apartment!!  I guess I should call AL PACINO!” — Zippy the Pinhead

I don’t think even Al could help in today’s political world…. Any who, what McCain objected to in Cruz’s speech were some comments he made comparing certain people with a certain view to Nazis… I’m not sure to whom he referred, but, it definitely offended McCain, and he made some comments of his own…. over which I had to laugh, heartily, as I could think of nothing other than “the pot calling the kettle black”….. If there is ANY political group that has shown characteristics shared by the Nazi Party in the last 50 years, it is the Republican Party, which can barely figure out how to phrase the planks of their platform without resorting to racist epithets….

Not only the Republicans, but the entire government machine, by its very bureaucratic nature, at times will naturally fall into postures which remind one of the fascists who once ran Germany, but are now confined mostly to chat rooms, and a few conclaves in Minneapolis (I hope…)…. As a perfect example of what I’m saying here, I offer the following article, from yesterday’s SF Chronicle, which describes the latest events in the housing market in SF, wherein nobody cares when the elderly and the disabled are abused, all in the name of BUSINESS….


“Our eviction-assistance team has been there several times and left notice for the family to contact us, but the family has chosen not to do so,” said Fahey. “We certainly don’t want anybody going without a place to live, but we have our orders.”

“I feel bad for the old people being evicted, and I can see why there is so much controversy,” said Allie Crocco, 25, who works in finance and moved into an apartment a few blocks away this summer. “But on the other hand, there’s a lot of money to be made in these buildings.”

There you have it, ffolkes…. Rampant Nazi-like behavior, with quotes…. The first of the two highlighted phrases, both of which came from the above article, was uttered by one of the people responsible for evicting people, under the law that was specifically passed for that purpose, to make it easier for businesses to get around the existing laws that protect the tenants…. Please note how it echoes the statements of more than one Nazi prison guard convicted during the Nuremberg Trials after WWII…. The other quote is from a person who lives nearby the house where the old couple is being evicted, and clearly demonstrates the lack of empathy in those who are not involved in the issue…. To the average joe in our society, if there is money to be made, it justifies ANYTHING, no matter how egregiously immoral it may be….

IMHO, no further rant is needed to make my point, so, I’ll trust in the intelligence of my Gentle Readers to fill in the rest of what might have been said, and, mercifully, was not….

“Coming up: our definitive answer to the JFK assassination, the Iran contra coverup, the cure for the common cold, and our hidden videotape of Madonna’s torrid affair…” — Anchorman, “Zombies in PJs”, Eerie Indiana

I’m hopeful for the quality of today’s Pearl, so the poem needs to be just right…. Let’s see what I can find….. Ah, this will do nicely….

Personal Helicon

for Michael Longley

As a child, they could not keep me from wells
And old pumps with buckets and windlasses.
I loved the dark drop, the trapped sky, the smells
Of waterweed, fungus and dank moss.

One, in a brickyard, with a rotted board top.
I savoured the rich crash when a bucket
Plummeted down at the end of a rope.
So deep you saw no reflection in it.

A shallow one under a dry stone ditch
Fructified like any aquarium.
When you dragged out long roots from the soft mulch
A white face hovered over the bottom.

Others had echoes, gave back your own call
With a clean new music in it. And one
Was scaresome, for there, out of ferns and tall
Foxgloves, a rat slapped across my reflection.

Now, to pry into roots, to finger slime,
To stare, big-eyed Narcissus, into some spring
Is beneath all adult dignity. I rhyme
To see myself, to set the darkness echoing.

~~ Seamus Heaney ~~


“It is quite untrue that British people don’t appreciate music. They may not understand it but they absolutely love the noise it makes.”–Sir Thomas Beecham

“Hateful to me as are the gates of hell, is he who, hiding one thing in his heart, Utters another.” — Homer (c. 700 B.C.)

As you can see, for this final section, Smart Bee has presented me with two directions to go… The two don’t stretch, in any way I can think of, to work together to make a point, at least, not one I’d care to make, so I’ll have to either make a decision, or trust to fate, an uncertain proposition at any time…. I’m feeling lucky, though, so let’s see what happens if I just dive in, like this… Oooh!, that’s cold!…. Okay, take a deep breath, and follow me…. Don’t worry, any sharks you see are just metaphors….

“Don’t take life too serious. It ain’t no ways permanent.” — Pogo, by Walt Kelly

“Here, let me show you.” — Famous Last Words

“A life spent making mistakes is not only more honorable, but more useful than a life spent doing nothing.” — George Bernard Shaw

“Every society needs someone whose job it is to tell the Emperor he’s naked.” — Smart Bee
(Me! Me! Pick me! I’ll do it for free!…. Oh, wait, I already do that…. okay, well…. to continue…)

“Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I’m not sure about the former.” — Albert Einstein

“At any price that I can pay, let me own myself. And the price is worth  paying if you keep what you have bought… A man may apply his independence to what is called worldly advantage, and discover too late that he  laboriously has made himself dependent on a mass of external conditions for the maintenance of which he has sacrificed himself. So he may be  festooned with the whole haberdashery of success, and go to his grave a castaway. Some men hold that the risk is worth taking. Others do not. It is to those that I have spoken.” — Rudyard Kipling, speech at the University of St. Andrews, Scotland, 1923, — quoted in _Kipling’s Science Fiction_ edited by John Brunner

“Small change can often be found under seat cushions.” — Lazarus Long

“Within the oyster’s shell uncouth
The purest pearl may hide,
Trust me you’ll find a heart of truth
Within that rough inside.”

— Mrs. Osgood

And aren’t we all glad that is so!… Well, I’m glad…. You’ll have to make your own decision as to how you feel about it…. What I’ve done here today, well, it’s the same, but different, sort of…. which is exactly what I need to think about…. See y’all tomorrow, perhaps with a new gestalt….. No new physique, no altered proportions, of anatomy or build, perhaps, but, just maybe, a bit of a change in the silhouette, some contrast to the shadows that haunt the edges of my perception….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest  Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.




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