The plaza began to fill with orphan collectors….

Typically….. Whoa! Wait a minute, here…. Well, hell……That word, “typically”, should NOT be where it is, and is, for a fact, one of those words that is programmed to trip my alarms, as it is on the list to never be used on this blog, when used in reference to myself….. Typical, normal, average, any word that resembles these has no application to my personality, or my life, for that matter, so I try not to use them at all when I’m talking about me. Of course, I also try not to use words of overt praise very often, as it might tend to swell my head, and my hat wouldn’t fit….. can’t have that…..

What most disturbs me about seeing the word there at the outset, is imagining what I might have had in mind for it to say. Whatever it was, it’s gone now; no trace anywhere of what it might have been, which means that my subconscious mind is again playing tricks on my conscious self, setting up little traps like this to confuse and distract, just as if Murphy didn’t do enough for me…

I know I told myself to go into hunker-down-and-wait-mode, which involves a great deal of looking for distractions to pass the time, and confusion is old friend, but, I didn’t think it would start so quickly, or, as it is my own head fussing with me, didn’t think it would feel so much like Murphy was at it again…. Apparently, my subconscious mind has been paying close attention when he has exercised his talents….

(This concludes the Murphy mention for the day…. bless his pointy head….)

Five to six weeks…. that is the current estimate for when a decision MIGHT get made on my SS disability. Yesterday, I saw the doctor who reviews the overall case for the agency, and is responsible for making the recommendation to grant or deny the application for benefits.

According to him, five to six weeks is what it generally takes for the final decision to wind its way through all the desks it has to pass after his contribution, so I think I can trust that figure, as he seemed to be competent. What he stated to me in the exam sounded good, since he indicated his belief that I am disabled enough to qualify, so I am hopeful of a correct decision, as another denial might very well push me too far over the edge to make it all the way back….

“Forward goes the vanguard of the lunatic fringe, tickling the death clowns of normality.” — HealNorm

So, if I sound a bit tense, or distracted, you’ll know where my mind has wandered; I’m trying hard NOT to think about it, and trying NOT to get my hopes up for a resolution, just in case the Analyst checks the wrong box by accident, or out of malice (though why he might feel any is hard to guess…. but, you never know, with a bureaucrat, just what is going through their tiny little minds….). That would be a typical Murphy-like transaction, wouldn’t it, to have it all go to court because of a typo, or a bad mood…. Come to think of it, I should probably just shut up about it altogether, so I don’t give Murphy any ideas….

“I’m just here for moral support. Ignore the gun.” — Smart Bee

Uh, oh…. you know what that means…. I’m going diving, and you can’t come along, nyah, nyah!…. Sorry, a little inner-child-breakout there…. Actually, I don’t mind if you come along, as long as you check your own equipment, and don’t get in the way while I’m trying to find some adequate pearls….. No worries, there aren’t many sharks in this part of the ocean, and they all know me, so it should be safe…. Shall we Pearl?…..

“It is better to be ignorant then (sic) to believe in something untrue.” — Smart Bee

Wow…. I found this unattributed statement in Smart Bee a moment ago, and it stopped me in my tracks….. At first, I thought it was due to the misspelling of “than” that caught my attention, but, after re-reading it a time or two, it just got weirder, and weirder, the more I thought about it…. My first explosive reaction was, “What a choice to have to make!” Then, my penchant for poking at inconsistency reared its ugly head….

Logically speaking, how could one accomplish the latter without first embracing the former? To go a bit deeper, why would one be considered better than the other, and, who decides? Anyone who can absorb this amazing statement into their persona is, to my way of thinking, is not someone to whom such an important distinction should be left to decide, as no matter which way they turn, it’s liable, nay, guaranteed, to be the wrong way….

I suppose the sentence could be improved, by the application of an AP comma…. to wit:ย  “It is better to be ignorant, then to believe in something untrue.” Now, in that form, it at least displays some logical sense, if in no way any common sense. I mean, with the comma providing the obviously intended break between ideas, it just sort of proves its own validity, for those who can either understand, or failing that, buy into anyway…. right? Right…. What he said….

As is obvious, as well, is that I’m not particularly serious here…. This is obviously the work of a person under the influence of drugs or alcohol, who got left where they could get to a computer, and started blathering to themselves, not knowing it was being preserved for posterity. I can’t think of any other reason for it to be in Smart Bee…. it doesn’t fit any of the criteria I’ve been able to identify for inclusion in the database….

It isn’t logical, it isn’t true, and it really doesn’t make any sense, though, in some strange way, it sounds as if it should do, or be all those things…. but, maybe that’s me…. I’ve been known to be wrong on occasion…. Hmm, yes, I remember distinctly, back in 1958…..ย ย  ๐Ÿ˜‰

“But your creed, your ethos… it was one of your most appealing features.”
“You know, Larry, sometimes I say things… and afterwards, I can’t remember saying them.”

— The Yak and The Badger debate philosophy


There is this white wall, above which the sky creates itself-
Infinite, green, utterly untouchable.
Angels swim in it, and the stars, in indifference also.
They are my medium.
The sun dissolves on this wall, bleeding its lights.

A grey wall now, clawed and bloody.
Is there no way out of the mind?
Steps at my back spiral into a well.
There are no trees or birds in this world,
There is only sourness.

This red wall winces continually:
A red fist, opening and closing,
Two grey, papery bags-
This is what i am made of, this, and a terror
Of being wheeled off under crosses and rain of pietas.

On a black wall, unidentifiable birds
Swivel their heads and cry.
There is no talk of immorality among these!
Cold blanks approach us:
They move in a hurry.

~~ Sylvia Plath

“…it is now some years since I detected how many were the false beliefs that I had believed to be true since my earliest youth.ย  And since that time, I have been convinced that I must once and for all seriously try to rid myself of all the opinions which I had formerly accepted, and begin to build anew, if I wanted to establish any firm and permanent structure for my beliefs.” — Rene Descartes, Meditations

And, after due consideration, he came up with, “I think, therefore I am.” That’s it…. after all his steady cogitation, all his heavy thought, he comes up with six words….. Seems like he might have gone a bit further with it, since he was already thinking, but, hey, that’s just me…..ย  He probably got distracted solving a quadratic equation in his head, or something equally fascinating, and just wrote down the first thing that came to him….. I suspect a lot of philosophies start that way, if what is in them is any indication…. Many of the ancient philosophies seem to me to have been put together during a drunken night around a campfire, and copied down the next day while hung over….

Actually, Descartes “I think” statement is one of the more consistent and logical of the statements that speak to belief, and its origins. I cannot say it is logically unassailable, for it is not, but, it is consistent within its own paradigm. This logical flaw is one reason I modified the idea when I came to make my own set of philosophical assertions, Peruaosophy…. where I said, in Axiom #1, “I think I am…. that’s close enough.”….. Much more tautological, I would say, and not subject to the same sort of picking apart, as it has no holes in it. Well, actually, it’s so holey it doesn’t need air-conditioning, but that is what supplies that logical strength, as it is a flexible enough proposition to fit any size mind….

It is not what we eat but what we digest that makes us strong,
It is not what we read but what we remember that makes us wise,
It is not what we earn but what we save that makes us rich,
It is not what beliefs we hold but what we do with those beliefs that make us what we are.

— Old Chinese misquotation.

You gotta love honesty…. I love that this is so aptly named as a misquotation; that kind of honesty just tickles my fancy, and makes for some good mental exercise…. In this case, it means trying to figure out WHICH part is misquoted, a process by which one can learn a lot, both about what is said in the quote, or misquote, and about themselves, and how their mind works. If it works, that is….

I am not sure exactly where this pearl is going…. it started out okay, but seems to be wandering a bit now, and I can’t seem to figure out how to find the way back to my original intent….. must be time for fresh coffee…. be right back….

“We begin life with a seemingly blank slate, and, though the writing that gradually appears on that slate is not our own, our judgment of the things written thereon determines what we are and what we will become. In much the same way, our work will be judged by the use to which other people put it…” — Marion Zimmer Bradley, _The Codex of Riveda_

What, then, is the mind? What is consciousness? We know they exist, for we perceive ourselves as a separate entity from the rest of what we perceive. Encountering other minds serves as corroboration of our perceptions, while at the same time offering solace for our separation from the universe, trapped alone in the confines of our minds, with only our own thoughts as company. I don’t know about anyone else, but just knowing there are others who are in the same boat is a comforting thought….. It’s a big universe, full of dark and dangerous energy, as well as beauty and opportunities for joy, and it would be a shame to have no one with whom to share it all….

“The mind of man is far from the nature of a clear and equal glass, wherein the beams of things should reflect according to their true incidence.” — Sir Francis Bacon

I suppose I’m just wandering now, rambling around in my own mind, without a clue as to how to bring this to a close…. but, here goes….

“I think I am…. that’s close enough.”ย  This is MY philosophy of life, and my take on consciousness…. As I see it, I know I’m here, and I know what I can do in my own mind….. and no matter what the rest of the universe is up to, or believes, that’s enough for me. I don’t need confirmation of my existence, or permission from aย  supernatural entity, or anyone else, to live my life the way I choose.

Mssr. Descartes statement is, to my mind, too stiff, too formal, and doesn’t meet the test of illogic…. We all interpret Reality in our own way, according to our own perceptions of that Reality, and our own set of decisions about how we will approach life…. our attitudes, as it were. We can make those attitudes whatever we choose, regardless of how clear are our motives to others; in my mind, all living creatures have that right…. with, of course, the caveat that whatever attitudes we choose must be able to merge with the attitudes of others, or, at least, not step on the other person’s right to the same freedom of choice…..

In short…. You were issued a mind when you came into this universe…. It would be a good thing, for you, and for the universe, to learn to use it….

Just a suggestion…. The reason I urge each and every one to make this effort is my strong belief in Axiom #2 of Peruaosophy, perhaps the most accurate, and powerfully influential, of all the axioms therein…. to wit:

Axiom #2: “The Nature of the Universe is Change. Unpredictable, innovative Transformation of Reality is the Norm. If you have a problem with this, you are in for a Rough Ride.”

Well…. that certainly came out better than I had surmised it might when I was in the middle of it all…. Hmm, now I’m creating my own metaphors right here in my own mind, because that statement right there is a pretty accurate description of most of my life up to this point…. Fancy that!….

I’m afraid to go any further with this, as it may have reached a delicate line, between being seen as carelessly brilliant, or blatantly bozoid, which, I can assure you, are both a part, if a trifle random in their relative placement therein….. If you can decipher the sense in that statement, you’re in the right blog…. I’m not sure that I am, other than…. wait for it….ย  I THINK I AM!…..ย  And that’s good enough for me…..ย  Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you…..

Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.



12 thoughts on “The plaza began to fill with orphan collectors….

  1. I have several hats – one for praises (4X), one I wear when criticized (L) and one when I am humbled (XS). All that hat wearing had deprived the follicles of oxygen and I am getting more sun tanned – if you know what I mean.

    And the women – they love my tan ๐Ÿ™‚

    • Aye, I know what you mean… I wear my hair very long, in a pony tail most of the time… unfortunately, very little of it is growing out of the top of my head… Now I resemble the hairstyle the monastic Celtic druid priests wore, bald halfway back, then long hair for the rest… it suits me…. and it tans well…. ๐Ÿ™‚

  2. hey gigoid, You write like a fantastic speaker… & this I like ! :
    “You know, Larry, sometimes I say thingsโ€ฆ and afterwards, I canโ€™t remember saying them.โ€ :)))

  3. that’s a hell of a lot of thought for one blog post! Question – do sayings make you think? On their own. Or do they just make you go, hmmm, maybe. Sylvia Plath – I’ve always thought she sounded like a prat, but I do like that poem. That may mean my mind has been opened.

    • Hmm… good question…. I think it’s a bit of both, but, mostly, it’s because I love to read, and I love aphorisms, as being small gems that hold beauty in the form of wisdom…. In this blog, I use them as springboards for discussion, so sometimes they are pearls (as I call them..) that are witty, some are silly, some are deep, some are wrong…. What they all have in common is that I can write something about them that interests me, and hopefully, the Gentle Reader…

      I’ve been a polymath all my life, and almost everything is interesting to me; I also have read a book every day since I was ten…. I’ve got a lot of stuff going on in my head, and since retiring a couple years ago, it’s all flowing out of me onto the screen.I kept my mouth shut most of my life, and I’m done with that….

      I also write as therapy…. I have post traumatic stress disorder, from working for many years in violent situations, and it helps me to get the stuff out of my head that would otherwise sit in there and fester, so to speak…. Better out than in, I always say…. ๐Ÿ™‚

      I hope you continue to enjoy the Pearls of Virtual Wisdom… I try to post every day, and don’t seem to be running out of material….. ๐Ÿ™‚

        • It isn’t always a blessing, believe me, and it certainly doesn’t make me ethical, or moral, or better intrinsically than anyone else…. Like Forrest’s mama said, “Stupid is as stupid does”, so I mostly just try to avoid being stupid…. ๐Ÿ™‚

          I’m glad you enjoyed the post, and hope to hear from you again… Take care, & Blessed Be, milady….

          ~~ gigoid

  4. Reblogged this on gigoid and commented:


    It seems the recovery process takes longer the older one gets; who knew? I collapsed, essentially, for most of yesterday, & didn’t get much done for this morning’s post. Hence, another dip into the archives. I’ll be back tomorrow, hopefully back on schedule, and track. For today, here’s a pretty deep & wide Pearl from a few years ago, pre-Social Security. I hope you enjoy it….

    gigoid, the fatigued….

  5. SAdly.. we live in a world now..
    where humans have bEcOme
    commodities and work
    is no longer creating
    and sharing a product
    that is useful to folks
    one can actually touch…
    REAL problem.. as humans are
    humans until they become machines
    and break down.. of course.. as humans
    WiLL who have FeeLinGS of course to sTARt
    with to lose.. and of course.. a few do not have
    that either through nurture or nature.. so in cold
    heARted way.. And.. Oh God.. the government
    disability process is like any Microsoft
    project of nerds without heart..
    as Steve Jobs might
    complain about
    Bill Gates
    in no ArT liFe
    cold mechanical
    cognition robot way..
    WitH no imagiNation..
    arT bRinGs wHolenoW
    aS logic without heARt
    Brings chaos that has
    no glue to get the miNd
    oF EmoTioNs through now
    for focus.. and iN short term
    memory as executive functioning
    with oil of sorts.. and the glUe oF iT…
    anyWay.. the system is designed by lawyers
    for lawyers.. and that’s the last place now wHere
    someone with a disability needs to be to navigate..
    Fortunately for me.. i was a lawyer more or less and
    with 100 pages of documentation was approved the
    first time like a breeze.. sAdly.. the system was not nearly
    as efficient after that as i received three forms asking if
    i was still getting workers comp.. when i never received
    that at all.. and kept on having to fill the paper work out..
    somehow with dentist drill in my right eye and ear never
    ending from wake to sleep.. seriously.. i was already
    intent on suicide for the first two years.. as those
    were boot straps that not even JOB could pull
    up then.. and that did just about put me over
    the edge as you say Murphy says..
    but some how i kicked Murphy
    in the ass and he seriously
    has just been wimpy
    for the last
    3 years..
    no matter
    what he attempts
    to do in bits and bytes
    hehe.. he ain’t got no teeth
    no more for me.. i won the battle..
    i won the war.. i AM ALIVE NOW KiCKING..
    yeah.. so i’m at the gym tonight and a twenty
    something muscular black military dude is now
    really kicking ass pumping iron making some
    gorilla sounds like me.. and i say.. man.. i like
    this.. you are really working hard and he turns
    around and says.. yeah.. man.. you are the one
    who inspired me
    to work out
    like this..
    Funny.. how
    people can make
    a difference without
    even saying a God Dam
    thing.. i AM.. ’cause i inspire
    others.. and that’s all tHere is to iT
    for NoW mY friend.. with words or steps
    oF liVing liFe as aweSoMe as all our
    functional disabilities as hUmans WiLL
    allow.. and trUe.. as professionally
    assessed in document way
    by three professionals..
    i am too disabled
    to do a pay
    for money
    job sTiLL
    yeS in
    way now..
    but not too
    disabled to help
    save the world in
    aLL our little ways.. mY
    friEnd THAT DO ADD UP..

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