Renfield, settle our account…. Use the real money….


“Hey, mister!”
“Got religion?”
“No, thank God.”

Okay, so maybe it’s not always the best way to begin…. I like it, though, if only for the degree of irony in the final line…. It probably doesn’t help soothe the minds of whatever readers may have ventured into today’s mess, but, dammit, this is ECR, and we won’t be pulling our punches for anybody! Not in THIS lifetime, even if it’s the only one we get this time (which is how it is beginning to appear….).

Life is too short, and too hard, to waste any time being hypocritical, especially when there has been enough trouble from that sector, (religion), historically, to last us, for as long as we want to hold a grudge…. Personally, I plan on holding it for a LONG time…. and, I LIKE looking myself in the eye every morning in the mirror….

Some days the ranting just jumps out of me, I guess. I’ve barely begun today, and I’m already deep into looking for new ways to say the same thing I’ve been saying for years now…. I hope to someday find the right words to awaken the sleeping dragon that is public sentiment, attempting, as I do, to engage society in the changes we will need to make in order to survive…..There are a lot of FOOLS alive today who insist on holding on to their ignorant denial of global warming and overpopulation, with FAR too many of those self-same fools in positions of leadership, they having persuaded society how harmless they seem to be….

These assholes are NOT harmless, though, and I’m getting really tired of seeing their denials in the news, given the same kind of coverage as what is true and necessary….. I’m sorry, but, at this point, I’m thinking it’s time to just quit being Mr. Nice Guy; these idiots will end up slowing things down enough that we ALL end up dead, when, in truth, THEY are the only ones who deserve to go the way of the dodo and the buffalo…. I’m very close to the point of making a decision to act…. If and when I make such a decision, it will be direct action, against those who would continue to argue that we have the time to allow their bullshit….

That won’t happen this morning, though…. I don’t have enough ammunition on hand; I’ll need to stock up…. and there’s a new cross-bow I’ve been looking at…. I like the cross-bow; quiet, powerful, with recyclable ammo…. an excellent weapon of choice for urban guerrilla warfare methodology…. As a weapon, its only drawback is its bulkiness…. If one has the time, and inclination, to recapture their used bolts, well, it’s easy to never run out of ammo… Plus, with some innovation, the bolts can be made into missiles of great destructive power, easily and accurately delivered from a reasonable distance from the target….

Any who, discussions of warfare technology and methodology aside, it seems we’ve come to a point where I need to make the decision to either continue on to the end of a rant, or end this here, and pretend it’s an intro section, as is our habit on most days…. Hmm, let me look back over what we’ve done here, and I’ll….

LOOK OUT! DUCK! INCOMING!….. Get down, ffolkes, we’ve got some heavy fire coming in…. Joe, get those guns online! Tom, activate the remote barriers…. Sally, fire up those catapults…. Let’s see how they like a bit of Greek fire raining down on their heads, eh?….

Sorry, ffolkes, you’ll have to excuse me, I’ve come under attack by unknown hostile forces, and must make a temporary foray out into the BBR to deal with the issue…. I’ll be back in a while, and will continue this Pearl at that time…. Until then, please enjoy the provided refreshments, over there on the table by the window, and be at ease…. You’ll be in no danger here; this facility is well-guarded, and is relatively impregnable to anything non-atomic in nature….

Shall we Pearl?…..

“But Rabshakeh said unto them, Hath my master sent me to thy master, and to thee, to speak these words?  Hath he not sent me to the men which sit on the wall, that they may eat their own dung, and drink their own piss with you?” — 2 Kings 18:27 (KJV)

“A taste for irony has kept more hearts from breaking than a sense of humor, for it takes irony to appreciate the joke which is on oneself.” — Jessamyn West  (Irony is when you buy a suit with two pair of pants, and then burn a hole in the coat.)

Having indulged myself shamelessly in the intro section, diving into fantasy, a tiny religipolitirant, a bit of technological gobbledygook, and some Sun Tzu, I feel as if a rant in this section would not only be over-doing it, but, could actually be considered to be tacky, and pushy…. Of course, there’s nothing wrong with being pushy when ranting; the whole point of a rant is to annoy the perpetrators, ultimately. It seldom does, of course, but, that’s the intent; we feel that intention should be honored, so we do…. But, today, and right now, it wouldn’t be right… for balance, and for integrity’s sake, we’ll go with an old-school pearl, with parameters such that we can find a bit of everything for our purposes….

“Yes, evil comes in many forms, whether it be a man-eating cow or Joseph Stalin, but you can’t let the package hide the pudding! Evil is just plain bad! You don’t cotton to it. You gotta smack it in the nose with the rolled-up newspaper of goodness! Bad dog. Bad dog.” — The Tick

“How prone to doubt, how cautious are the wise!” — Alexander Pope (1688-1744) — The Odyssey of Homer, Book xiii, Line 375

“By virtue we merely mean the avoidance of the vices that do not attract us.” — Robert Lynd

“I think too much or not at all.” — Isaac Asimov

There is a time for thinking and a time for NOT thinking.  And THIS isn’t one of them.” — Paul the Samurai

“‘And how do you do your job, then, if you don’t exist?’
‘By will power,’ said Agilulf, ‘and faith in our cause.’
‘Oh yes, yes, well said, that is how one does one’s duty. Well, for someone who doesn’t exist, you seem in fine form.'”

— Italo Calvino, “The Nonexistent Knight”

“Keep me away from the wisdom which does not cry, the philosophy which does not laugh, and the greatness which does not bow before children.” — Kahlil Gibran

Well, then, having achieved the balance so desperately sought, through the liberal application of empathetic synergy, I propose we move on…. Plus, those cops over there are giving us the hard eye, so, follow me, ffolkes….

I found this while perusing other poems, and just thought it would be a nice little change for all of us…. You can always count on Keats for something new and fun….

Ben Nevis: A Dialogue

There was one Mrs. Cameron of 50 years of age and the fattest woman in all Inverness-shire who got up this Mountain some few years ago — true she had her servants — but then she had her self. She ought to have hired Sisyphus, — ‘Up the high hill he heaves a huge round — Mrs. Cameron.’ ‘Tis said a little conversation took place between the mountain and the Lady. After taking a glass of Whiskey as she was tolerably seated at ease she thus began —

Mrs. C.
Upon my Life Sir Nevis I am pique’d
That I have so far panted tugg’d and reek’d
To do an honour to your old bald pate
And now am sitting on you just to bate,
Without your paying me one compliment.
Alas ’tis so with all, when our intent
Is plain, and in the eye of all Mankind
We fair ones show a preference, too blind!
You Gentle man immediately turn tail —
O let me then my hapless fate bewail!
Ungrateful Baldpate have I not disdain’d
The pleasant Valleys — have I not madbrain’d
Deserted all my Pickles and preserves
My China closet too — with wretched Nerves
To boot — say wretched ingrate have I not
Le[f]t my soft cushion chair and caudle pot.
‘Tis true I had no corns — no! thank the fates
My Shoemaker was always Mr. Bates.
And if not Mr. Bates why I’m not old!
Still dumb ungrateful Nevis — still so cold!

Here the Lady took some more whiskey and was putting even more to her lips when she dashed it to the Ground for the Mountain began to grumble — which continued for a few minutes before he thus began,

Ben Nevis.
What whining bit of tongue and Mouth thus dares
Disturb my slumber of a thousand years?
Even so long my sleep has been secure —
And to be so awakened I’ll not endure.
Oh pain — for since the Eagle’s earliest scream
I’ve had a dam[n]’d confounded ugly dream,
A Nightmare sure. What Madam was it you?
It cannot be! My old eyes are not true!
Red-Crag, my Spectacles! Now let me see!
Good Heavens Lady how the gemini
Did you get here? O I shall split my sides!
I shall earthquake —–

Mrs. C.
Sweet Nevis do not quake, for though I love
You[r] honest Countenance all things above
Truly I should not like to be convey’d
So far into your Bosom — gentle Maid
Loves not too rough a treatment gentle Sir —
Pray thee be calm and do not quake nor stir
No not a Stone or I shall go in fits–

Ben Nevis.
I must — I shall — I meet not such tid bits —
I meet not such sweet creatures every day —
By my old night cap night cap night and day
I must have one sweet Buss — I must and shall:
Red Crag! — What Madam can you then repent
Of all the toil and vigour you have spent
To see Ben Nevis and to touch his nose?
Red Crag I say! O I must have them close!
Red Crag, there lies beneath my farthest toe
A vein of Sulphur — go dear Red Crag, go–
And rub your flinty back against it — budge!
Dear Madam I must kiss you, faith I must!
I must Embrace you with my dearest gust!
Block-head, d’ye hear — Block-head I’ll make her feel
There lies beneath my east leg’s northern heel
A cave of young earth dragons — well my boy
Go thither quick and so complete my joy
Take you a bundle of the largest pines
And when the sun on fiercest Phosphor shines
Fire them and ram them in the Dragon’s nest —
Then will the dragons fry and fizz their best
Until ten thousand now no bigger than
Poor Alligators — poor things of one span —
Will each one swell to twice ten times the size
Of northern whale — then for the tender prize —
The moment then — for then will Red Crag rub
His flinty back — and I shall kiss and snub
And press my dainty morsel to my breast.
Block-head make haste!
O Muses weep the rest —
The Lady fainted and he thought her dead
So pulled the clouds again about his head
And went to sleep again — soon she was rous’d
By her affrighted servants — next day hous’d
Safe on the lowly ground she bless’d her fate
That fainting fit was not delayed too late.

But what surprises me above all is how this Lady got down again.

~~ John Keats ~~


I grew up having to listen to Billy G., far too many times…. Here is a rant from a couple years ago, with his words as the stimulus, which is as it should be….. Not that he, being who he is, would ever admit to any responsibility for them…. It’s more the habit of a Christian to blame what they do or say on Jesus…. and, since Billy is, perhaps. the most well-known, self-defined Christian in the Western world, he is VERY good at that….

From May 12, 2012:

“God is more interested in your future and your relationships than you are.” — Billy Graham

First, let me apologize…. I hadn’t meant to go into a rant this morning, especially about religion; sitting down is as difficult as standing up, or walking, so the time it takes to express the outrage necessary to produce a rant is more than I wanted to take. But then this popped up in front of me….

After I had picked myself up from the floor and recovered my breath, I still could barely stop chuckling and giggling long enough to use the mouse to cut and paste it to this page. Now that I have, I find myself almost speechless at the sheer arrogance, the complete lack of respect shown for humanity at large by this astounding statement.

In one short phrase, this deeply disturbed man has attempted to manipulate his listeners into a complete subjugation of their will, and in doing so, implies that they are not only unworthy in a moral sense, but are not smart enough to be allowed to think for themselves. I’m surprised he didn’t ask for money in the same sentence…. You can bet he did before the end of the night….

I remember seeing Billy Graham when I was quite young, speaking on TV to a football stadium full of enthusiastically cheering, excited, identical female clones in white cotton dresses, with skirts below the knees, and young, clean-cut, earnest looking young men in blue suits, with white shirts, no vests, and skinny ties. Even at the tender age of 11 or so when I saw it, my first impression of him was of a used-car salesman, with a smarmy-looking smile at inappropriate moments, and a smooth, fawning manner of speaking that ranged from sly confidences to outraged proclamations of evil and sin, all delivered in very obviously scripted stages.

The words and phrases he used, straight out of the King James Bible, mostly, seemed to promote love and tolerance, but the underlying message was one of elitism and divisiveness, as indicated by the insistence that only those who accepted JC according to their rules would be allowed into heaven…. The rest of us would be consigned to everlasting hell for having the audacity to think differently….. It was pretty over-the-top, as far as I was concerned, though entertaining in a circus sort of way…. (My five-year-old’s crap detector was on full, and rejected all of his words pretty much out of hand, as too obviously false to consider…. Just another adult spouting off stuff that made no sense….)

It is now 50 years since I saw that particular revival meeting; with a dismal display of stubborn perseverance, Mr. Graham has continued to spew his particular brand of ignorance for that entire time. He is indeed one of the men of whom St. Francis of Assisi warned us to beware, a man of one book. And the above statement, to me, is proof of just how little he thinks of the general run of human beings. His basic message, to paraphrase what he said above, is, “You are a miserable sinner, and have no right to exist, other than by the mercy of God. You are not smart enough to keep from sinning on your own, so just shut up and do what you are told….”

It is certainly proof, I guess, that it takes all kinds to make a world, for there are millions of folks out there who regard what Billy Graham says as just as much gospel as what is in the Bible…. but then in for a penny, in for a pound, I suppose…. Me, I’d rather listen to a ball game….


Back in real-time, 2014, for some concluding comments: While searching for pearls for another section, I came across the following gem; it turns out to be a PERFECT example of the mind-set that one of Mr. Graham’s sermons can create in people…. I also wish to nominate this statement as the stupidest remark by an elected official in the latter half of the twentieth century  EVER MADE IN PUBLIC……  Perhaps one of you could call Guinness, or the Pulitzer Committee?….

“I can see stopping a car for a dog.  But a cat? You squish a cat and go on.  I think we’re over-complicating life.” — Iowa Democratic State Senator James Gallagher

I may be going a bit overboard this year; I can’t seem to shorten these Pearls back to the size I had evolved into creating. Ah well, such is life in blog land…. It’s done, and to my way of thinking, that’s good enough…. Remember, ffolkes, Life requires us to be honest with ourselves, if nobody else, and that means we need to live our lives so we have no regrets…. ever…. We are the only ones who can judge how we’re doing on that, which is where the honesty comes in…. See ya….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest  Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.



5 thoughts on “Renfield, settle our account…. Use the real money….

    • I believe you’re right, as to that being a quote by Mahatma, though I originally thought that particular quote was from G.K. Chesterton… Aha… according to Google, G.K. said, “The Christian ideal has not been tried and found wanting; it has been found difficult and left untried.”

      Gandhi, I know, also said, when asked what he thought about Western civilization, “I think that would be a good idea….” 🙂

      Personally, regarding Christianity’s core beliefs, I consider the entire concept specious, and believe that those who accept its assertions to be delusional, since the whole ball of wax is predicated upon a set of assumptions for which there is NO real evidence…. I don’t agree that we need to have SOMETHING in place to take the place of religions… as Voltaire said, “I tell you a devouring beast is killing you and your family, and you ask me with what I’d replace it?”… Or, something close to that; I’m sure that quote isn’t exact, but it covers the idea….

      My opinion is, I am capable of understanding, and learning to deal with the Universe without having to resort to some fictional character acting as a supernatural ‘deus ex machina’ in the real-time world we all inhabit…. I can deal with it just the way it is, thank you…. Yeah, it can be scary, but, not so much I need to shuffle off the blame for it, or for how I react to it, onto some undeserving, and unsuspecting, innocent fictional character….

      As for life after death, I’ve always liked what Bob Heinlein said, as Lazarus Long, when he had him say, “There is no direct evidence that supports the concept of life after death; there is also no direct evidence against it. Either way, you will know soon enough, so, why fret about it?”…. 😉

      Consciousness is a form of energy, and, as such, cannot be destroyed… It can only be induced to change form, such as from gravitational potential to kinetic, or electrical to kinetic, or biochemical to electrical, etc…. I can’t say what form consciousness will take when I die, but, that’s what makes it an adventure, yes? Yes….

      Sorry, I know you didn’t intend to set me off again…. 😳

      Take care, brother, & Blessed Be…. 😀

  1. Reblogged this on gigoid and commented:


    I woke up in a foul mood, without apparent cause, at least none I’m willing to discuss. Here’s a decent sublimation, to get me to tomorrow, when, perhaps, the universe will be less troublesome to an old curmudgeon…. See ya….


  2. Used car salesman..
    yes.. mostly men..
    and that makes
    as mostly
    men become
    preachers to
    mostly control
    women.. number
    one.. and mostly
    control everyone else..
    number two.. yeah
    the pisses and
    shits as
    they come
    our way.. WeLL..
    today in New Jerusalem..
    down South a few miles
    in P’cola town.. a
    full convention
    of these skinny
    tied males
    and no vests..
    as of course.. Jesus
    F. iN Christ.. oh.. the pain
    and misery of not wearing
    shorts sleeves and shorts
    in a Florida humid Summer
    unlike me for those who do the
    extremes of temps..
    just for target
    practice as
    i like to
    say now..
    so tHeRe is..
    Jesus F. in Christ..
    yes2 liar Jesus'(s)2.. hell no..
    not spReading good news
    per a Gospel of so-called
    Golden Rule of Buddha
    fearless Love.. instead..
    there is the gospel
    of fear and hate of
    if you do
    not become
    one of us you
    are going somewhere
    that we imagine you are
    going to whether you like
    it or not.. of course with all
    the other non-ignorant humans
    with tHeir windows raised up..
    and perhaps they were listening
    SAYS FucK
    THEM.. GOD
    ONE SAME..
    AND HATE.. anyway.. i could have some
    real fun with those folks.. but i chatted with
    another sidewalk Good Samaritan Homeless
    woman.. gave her 5 bucks.. and she said none
    of the homeless souls who call themselves
    street light evangelists even gave
    her the time of day..
    does anyone really
    know what time it is..
    welL it’s never tiMe
    NOW for God dam
    bad news for mE noW..
    i’LL take the homeless
    woman over sidewalk
    dEvils with bad news
    any God dam day oF liGht oF Y i..:)

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