Monthly Archives: September 2011

Barring further difficulties….

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Ffolkes,
Fear not, mes amis, the sun does indeed come up every morning, and since I try to get these done before it gets too far up in the sky, they actually provide me with a reason to get up. Yesterday’s little mini-rant re: my ongoing battle with reality in its baser aspects prompted responses from friends, which I should have realized would happen. I was mostly laying things out so I could examine them, but it did turn out to sound worse than I make it out to be. Sure, I’m uncomfortable sometimes, and actually more embarrassed than anything else, but it could be worse. Seven years ago I was looking at having no retirement at all; zip, zero, zilch. So it could be worse, and I will survive, and be happy, because those are two things I’m very good at….. I’m sorry to have worried my friends, but I guess they wouldn’t be my friends if it hadn’t, a fact for which I am continually grateful.


Meanwhile, back in the real world, I must go out to do battle with bureaucracies in a multitude of guises. Places to go, forms to fill out, stores to cruise, people to avoid or engage, miles to go before I get to the naps to take category. It’s tough, but I don’t mind; as long as I get to the nap, the rest will take care of itself. It’s all just routine, easy but time-consuming BS. I suppose that makes composing this silly thing the high point of the day, eh what? Picking these Pearls was most likely the most fun, and most productive thing I’ll do all day. And if not, well, the sun will be back up tomorrow…..

It really doesn’t matter if you’re the prey or the predator, if you want to live to see the sunset, you’ve got to start the day running.

Seas roll to waft me, suns to light me rise;
My footstool earth, my canopy the skies.
— Alexander Pope (1688-1744)
— Essay on Man, Epistle i, Line 139

Sounds travel slowly. Sometimes the things you say to your kids don’t reach them till they’re in their 40s.

I held it truth, with him who sings
To one clear harp in divers tones,
That men may rise on stepping-stones
Of their dead selves to higher things.
— Alfred Tennyson (1809-1892)
— In Memoriam, i, Stanza 1

There are two intelligent responses to contemporary Western civilization: laughter and despair. You’ll note I’m not laughing.

“There is one art of which man should be master — the art of reflection.” — Samuel Taylor Coleridge

Remember, kids, it’s all illusion, just a dream. To change is natural, though often a surprise. It is our mind that makes the decision as to whether it is a burden, or a gift…..

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Dozer

Kowabunga!

Deliberate frankness on toast points…

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Ffolkes,
Contemplation of impending disaster, as I can say from experience, is an exercise in futility. It does me no earthly good to be smart enough to realize that everything is going to come crashing down around my ears next week, when I’m not smart enough to figure out how to keep it from happening. By this time next week, I’ll most likely be joining a new economic level, several steps below the poverty level that I have heretofore been struggling with. I am having to make some hard decisions, like having to sell my car, simply because I can’t pay for it, and eat too. Hell, it’s been three months since I could afford the extra money to go get a fast-food burger, and that was the last time I actually had beef to eat. A steak? Forget it, haven’t tasted one in over a year.


In spite of my supposed maturity, I find myself playing the blame game over this situation. It wasn’t my choice to retire when I did; I did it only to keep from getting fired as being unfit for duty, thanks to the callous disregard for common decency shown by the NSH Executive Director. In retrospect, I made an incorrect decision then, and am now paying the price. I should have immediately filed a Workman’s comp claim for my back, and then applied for a disability retirement. Instead, due to my stupid pride, and not wishing to be labeled as ‘disabled’,  I went for the standard retirement, not realizing at the time that it wouldn’t be enough to live on. For nine months now I’ve been trying to stem the incoming tide, and as a result, I’ve fallen behind every month to the tune of about $600, and the interest just keeps on climbing, because I can’t even pay that. Add in to that the passing of my mother, and my best friend, Noah, and you have a perfect picture of a man about ready to go under for the third time.


In the past year and change, I have been forced out of my job, had the great love of my life kick me to the curb, and lost half or more of my income. My dog died, my mother died, and as a result of doing my duty for my mother, I lost out on a cruise (my retirement gift to myself), and my sister and her family put me on their death-wish list. I’ll soon be without transportation. I have no TV, and thanks to having been cut off from all the people I knew at work, I have no friends here in town. My only contact with the outside world is my phone and email; soon I may have to give up the email, because I’m not certain I can afford the monthly  internet charge. If that happens, my only access will be at the library, to which I must walk, since I won’t have a car.


I’m not sure why this all came out this morning, other than the fact that all of this is crashing around in my head all the time, and there’s nowhere else to put it. In some ways it helps me to clarify all the details, so I can better deal with it. But the simple fact is that I don’t have the money to support myself in anything near the level I previously enjoyed. As a matter of fact, enjoyment will be in pretty short supply pretty soon, so I’m holding on to it as long as I can. All of this is not intended to create sympathy for my plight; I’ll survive, and don’t want sympathy anyway. Putting this all down has helped me to look at it all with some emotional distance, without passion, something not to be found inside my head. If hearing this disturbs you, I am sorry. Perhaps it’s time to look at things a bit more positively, so without further ado, we will join the regularly scheduled program in progress……remember, think positive!….

If you’re looking for trouble, I can offer a wide selection.

Marjoe and Doshen were meditating in a field when Doshen just went and smacked Marjoe upside the head.  “What the hell did you do that for?” asked Marjoe. “Nyuck nyuck nyuck,” replied Doshen. At that moment, Marjoe ordered pizza.

A rose is a rose is a rose…. —-‘–,-{@

“I’ve reached that age when a good day is one when you get up and nothing hurts.” — H. Martin

The sky is changed,–and such a change! O night
And storm and darkness! ye are wondrous strong,
Yet lovely in your strength, as is the light
Of a dark eye in woman! Far along,
From peak to peak, the rattling crags among,
Leaps the live thunder.
— Lord Byron (1788-1824)
— Childe Harold’s Pilgrimage, Canto iii, Stanza 92

Being normal isn’t one of my strengths.

Hell, I’d settle for normal right now, if I could get an offer….. y’all take care out there…..

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.
gigoid
Dozer

Kowabunga!

Trial by margarine….

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Ffolkes,
Not wobbling is harder than it seems it would be; it takes a lot of concentration. And Murphy is certainly no help. My primary regret is that Life doesn’t come with a handy User’s Manual. It seems to me that something important like this would come with a few instructions, but nooooo, you have to guess. How to tie a shoe? Figure it out. How to eat? If you’re hungry, you’ll eat; but be careful not to eat the wrong stuff. You have to already know the wrong stuff. Get married? Good luck, because you are on your own. Raise kids? Actually, there are a lot of books on this, but each one advises different techniques, and they’re all useless. Even if you choose the right one, there’s still no guarantee that your kids won’t end up with their picture on the post office wall.
We don’t get a manual, and we sure could use one. If we had one, everyone could be given their manual on the first day of school, and we could all learn something more useful than Dick’s inane conversations with Jane. Of course, even if we had a manual, many folks would just ignore it, or use it to gain some kind of advantage over others. That’s the part that even the manuals don’t understand or explain; human nature defies classification. No matter how good a system is, no matter how high the ideals striven for, no matter how noble are some people, there will always be someone who perverts and twists things to suit their own purposes. There is always some idiot who believes they are ‘mo bettah’ than other folks, and who will try to arrange matters so they have power. This is why we have global warming, and impending financial ruin, and constant wars. As long as there are people who desire power, we will continue to have these issues, and we will most certainly join the dodo, the brontosaurus, and every other species that has become extinct. The difference between all of them and us is that we will become extinct by our own hands. There, now don’t you feel better?….

“I like living. I have sometimes been wildly, despairingly, acutely miserable, racked with sorrow, but through it all I still know quite certainly that just to be alive is a grand thing.” — Agatha Christie

“I am ignorant of absolute truth. But I am humble before my ignorance, and therein lies my honor and my reward.” — Kahlil Gibran

There is no ornament like virtue,
There is no misery like worry,
There is no protection like patience,
There is no friend equal to generosity.
— Nagarjuna (c. 100-200 A.D.)

“Everything in excess! To enjoy the flavor of life, take big bites. Moderation is for monks.” — Lazarus Long, from Robert A. Heinlein’s “Time Enough For Love”

“This is my simple religion. There is no need for temples; no need for complicated philosophy. Our own brain, our own heart is our temple; the philosophy is kindness.” — Dalai Lama

If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?

I don’t know about y’all, but I’m a little worried about the future….I sure hope there is one…….y’all take care out there….

Sometimes I sits and thinks,

and sometimes

I just sits.

gigoid

Dozer at play..

Kowabunga!

The taste of ambition is bitter and cold….

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Ffolkes,
Morgan Templeton watched with interest as the sun rose majestically above the western hills, ablaze with the promise of the new day. As the light spread, he pushed away from the tree against which he leaned, and strode purposefully down to his waiting horse. Swinging lightly into the saddle, he urged the horse into a canter, away from the rising sun, toward the towering trees of the forest that lay across the horizon to the west. Slowing the horse to a walk as he entered the trees, Morgan passed within the vale, following a slight path that wound through the trees, leading ever further into the woods. His eyes never stopped moving, side to side, up and down, back again. He knew it was relatively safe in this part of the forest, but long years of living in danger had taught him never to lose track of his surroundings, lest death become too familiar. Safety lay in remaining alert, and Morgan had good reason to want to remain alive, good reason indeed.


So, I was talking to a friend yesterday, and he says to me, “I just got a new computer for my wife.” I told him, “good trade, dude.” A little humor is always a good way to start the day, don’t you think? I know it always helps me to approach the day with a lighter heart. What’s that? What happened to Morgan in the forest? Hell, your guess is as good as mine; I just write the damn stuff, I don’t pay any attention to it beyond the spell check. It got me this far, didn’t it? Some days that kind of drivel just leaps onto the screen; some days it leads somewhere, some days not so much. So today was a not so much. Remember what you are paying for this, and be content….it’s worth every penny…..

“In walking, just walk. In sitting, just sit. Above all, don’t wobble.” — Yun-Men

‘You govern a kingdom by normal rules;
You fight a war by exceptional moves;
But you win the world by letting alone,
How do I know that this is so?
By what is within me!
The more taboo and inhibitions there are in the world,
The poorer the people become.
The sharper the weapons the people posses,
The greater confusion reigns in the realm.
The more clever and crafty the men,
The oftener strange things happen.
The more articulate the laws and ordinances,
The more robbers and thieves arise.’
— Tao Teh Ching #57, Lao Tzu

Be the master of your will and the slave of your conscience. — Hasidic saying

In bed we laugh, in bed we cry;
And, born in bed, in bed we die.
The near approach a bed may show
Of human bliss to human woe.
— Isaac de Benserade (1612-1691)

“I can remember the first time I had to go to sleep.  Mom said, “Steven, time to  go to sleep.”  I said, “But I don’t know how.”  She said, “It’s real easy.  Just go down to the end of tired and hang a left.”  So I went down to the end of tired, and just out of curiosity I hung a right.  My mother was there, and she said “I thought I told you to go to sleep.” — Steven Wright

I love this one…”above all, don’t wobble.” Priceless! Perfect advice for leading the good life; don’t wobble. Good stuff…..y’all take care out there…..

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Dozer

Kowabunga!

Connotations of rainbows….

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Ffolkes,
I think it’s safe to say we all get pretty tired of the political circus as played out here in the USA; it all seems so pointless, until you realize it is directly affecting your own life, then it just gets irritating. Everyone I know has beliefs and convictions, with their own methods of dealing with the world, and their own methods of how to treat other people. Mostly they all get along just fine. Then I look at what is being said in the arena of public discourse, and there doesn’t seem to be any correlation, no connection with what I know is real for most folks. The avaricious ones, the ones who seek public office, have an entirely different view of reality than most of the Americans I know. Even the conservatives I talk to think differently than the politicians, except for those few who allow the politicians to do their thinking for them, and merely parrot those talking points currently in fashion. It’s unfortunate that there are a LOT of the last category, which is part of the reason why the talking heads are able to maintain their death-grip on the almighty profit margin.


Since the whole point of the above is how sick I am of hearing the nonsense in the news, I won’t rant any further today on that subject. Don’t really feel like ranting anyway; it’s already been a tough morning, and I’d rather turn in a more positive direction. It took over 25 minutes on the phone, but I was able to complete a necessary task this A.M., and I’m using that to act as the driver for the rest of today’s tasks. All of this is just a long, convoluted and obfuscatory way to say, enjoy!……

“Confront them with annihilation, and they will survive; plunge them in a deadly situation, and they will then live. When people fall into danger, they are then able to strive for victory.” — Sun Tzu

Invictus
Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.
In the fell clutch of circumstance,
I have not winced nor cried aloud
Under the bludgeoning of chance;
My head is bloody but unbowed.
It matters not how straight the gate,
How charged with punishment the scroll;
I am the master of my fate,
I am the captain of my soul.
— Henley

I know you think that you understood what you thought I said, but I am not  all that sure that you understand that I seldom say what I think and even less often do I mean what I say.

Don’t say you don’t have enough time. You have exactly the same number of hours per day that were given to Helen Keller, Louis Pasteur, Michelangelo, Mother Teresa, Leonardo da Vinci, Thomas Jefferson, and Albert Einstein.

If you think women are moody and bossy – get a cat.

Come away, O human child!
To the waters and the wild
With a faery, hand in hand,
For the world’s more full of weeping than you can understand.
— William Butler Yeats, “The Stolen Child”

There you go; a little whimsy is good for the soul…..so is epiphany. Y’all take care out there…..

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Dozer

Kowabunga!

Buses you can ride, or not…

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Ffolkes,

It is once again Sunday, and it looks as if we’ll get some rain. And talking about the weather is pretty much a useless pastime, but it’s all I’ve got today. I am, for some reason, exhausted, and I just got up. I believe I know the reason for that, though, and will have to take care of it some day very soon. Meanwhile, I’m going to just give you the Pearls today, and they can stand on their own. I’ll write tomorrow, I promise….

“A good many dramatic situations begin with screaming.” — Barbarella

“Communication is next to impossible with someone who has no doubts.” — Limon

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I —
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
— Robert Frost, The Road Not Taken

“Each has his past shut in him like the leaves of a book known to him by his heart, and his friends can only read the title.” — Virginia Woolf

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

“On the other hand, life can be an endless parade of TRANSSEXUAL QUILTING BEES aboard a cruise ship to DISNEYWORLD if only we let it!!” — Zippy the Pinhead

Yes, if only we will let it, life can be what it is…..y’all take care out there….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Just Dozer

Kowabunga!

By any other name, the same….

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Ffolkes,
As humans, we seem to have a need for meaning; without purpose, we lose our way every time. What other creature do we know that can stand before the burgeoning day, watching the panorama of daybreak, and feel a need to know why? With oblivious dignity and sheer beauty, the sun rises each morning, casting its life-giving rays without prejudice or seeming cause; we watch, and wonder, why? Are all the creatures on this world doing the same? I would hope so, but I fear not. I suppose it is just as well; having imagination hasn’t seemed to lift us above our baser selves, or shown any strong evidence of possessing any evolutionary advantage. Quite the contrary, in truth; much in today’s society that can be called evil is a direct result of our imagination, and its perversion. Ah well……life goes on….

Well, there you have it, ffolkes. I’ve busted the bank. Emptied out the cupboards. Sent off the notices. I am intellectually bankrupt. My mind of late finds itself all too often engaged in sheer catatonia, bereft of thought, forsaken in my moment of need. I can only see one hopeful sign…..okay, make that none. I have no idea where my mind has gone, but I’d best stop here, as I can’t be sure of what will come out of my head just now…it could be dangerous, to my health, and ultimately, yours. So, just dive in to today’s offerings, and hold out some hope that tomorrow, things will have returned to a more normal level of insanity. It could work……maybe….

To sorrow
I bade good-morrow,
And thought to leave her far away behind;
But cheerly, cheerly,
She loves me dearly;
She is so constant to me, and so kind.
— John Keats (1795-1821)
— Endymion, Book iv

“The intuitive mind is a sacred gift; the rational mind is faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift.” — Albert Einstein

“I refuse to have a battle of wits with an unarmed person.” — Pogo, character in “Pogo,” comic strip by Walt Kelly
(I always wondered who came up with that line….)

“Society produces rogues, and education makes one rogue cleverer than another.” — Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)

“Ignorance of death is destroying us. Death is the dark backing a mirror needs if we are to see anything.” — Saul Bellow

“In morals, what begins in fear usually ends in wickedness; in religion, what begins in fear usually ends in fanaticism. Fear, either as a principle or a motive, is the beginning of all evil.” — Mrs. Jameson (Amen sister!)

So much for ingenuity…… y’all take care out there…..

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Dozer

Kowabunga!

Contemplating whirled peas…

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Ffolkes,
Of late, coming up with a fresh idea has been, shall we say, problematic at best. I sit and stare at the screen, while various scenarios play out in my head, but none of them clamor to get into print. And they (ideas) can’t be forced into service, willy-nilly; they turn ugly and nasty to deal with. So I try to think of nonsense, and of course, all that comes to mind is politics, which we are all sick of, and wish the pundits would all just SHUT IT for a day or two. I swear, it’s several times a day we have to hear about the latest batch of BS coming out of their cavernous mouths, and each statement is more outrageously stupid than the one before. By election-day, we’ll all be so crazy, it won’t matter who we elect because we’ll all be stone catatonic.


But, there is hope. At least the ffolkes who receive these will be inoculated against the contagious ignorance so prevalent today. Didn’t you know? These Pearls are far and away the best medicine that can be found in the fight against rampant stupidity, against which the gods themselves contend in vain.  Heck, you can even use them for the entertainment factor. Take any two of the Pearls, and use them when speaking with someone whose opinions are primarily faith-based. You will note the glazing-over of the eyes, the hunching of shoulders, the withdrawal into cliche, and the stark fear of the unknown which will manifest in the light of evidence-based fact. It’s almost gratifying, until one thinks of how many of these piteous folk there are in the world, how great is the challenge to bring them into the light; getting them to open their eyes to see will remain a problem even then. You can lead a man to knowledge, but you can’t make him think. Which is really too bad, n’est pas? Enjoy……..

“Love doesn’t just sit there, like a stone, it has to be made, like bread; re-made all the time, made new.”– Ursula K. LeGuin, The Lathe of Heaven

In just two days, tomorrow will be yesterday.

The thought manifests as the word;
The word manifests as the deed;
The deed develops into habit;
And habit hardens into character.
So watch the thought and its ways with care,
And let it spring from love
Born out of concern for all beings.
— The Buddha

Cats, no less liquid than their shadows, offer no angles to the wind.

“The only people for me are the mad ones, the ones who are mad to live, mad to talk, mad to be saved, desirous of everything at the same time,
the ones who never yawn or say a commonplace thing, but burn, burn, burn like fabulous yellow roman candles exploding like spiders across the stars…” — Jack Kerouac, “On the Road”

“Everybody wants to go to heaven, but nobody wants to die.” — Joe Louis

And so begins another day…..y’all take care out there…..

 

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.gigoid

Just Dozer

Kowabunga!

Some of the shine has rubbed off….

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Ffolkes,
Many are the times in the past when the construction of this daily missive sent me into the realm of nonsense, looking for material to keep that freshness so necessary to an undertaking of this nature. There always must be the hook, yes? The initial images or phrases create a tone for what comes after, pulling the gentle reader along into the frame of mind I seek to create, a fallow field, as it were, in which to sow my seeds of thought, hoping they will grow into a small but complete revelation.  Needless to say, I probably don’t always hit the mark, but for the most part, I think I do pretty well. If nothing else, I’ve always been able to segue into the next phase without much fuss, so it must work, at least some of the time.
It is days like today that usually put me into the nonsense mode; cognition didn’t start until just a few minutes ago. I slept late, & realized when I got up that there was no coffee in the house (unfortunately, running out of food items is getting to be a daily issue). So, I had to drag my sorry butt to my landlord’s store, where he graciously allows me to charge food until the first of the month. This meant, however, that I had to dress enough to stay out of jail, to then actually drive at a legal speed, talk to people without scaring them (always a chore, but without coffee? Nearly impossible…), and then wait for it to finish brewing without putting any holes in the wall. It was touch’n go there for a few minutes as to whether my bills this month included new plaster. Finally, with caffeine working its magic, I sat down to begin, and found the all-too-familiar empty head syndrome in full possession of my mind. Hence, this rambling, chatty yet superficial, conversation with myself. Just so we all can get on with the day, I now give you a quite eclectic group of Pearls of Virtual Wisdom……enjoy!

“Facts do not cease to exist because they are ignored.” — Aldous Huxley

He that lacks time to mourn, lacks time to mend.
Eternity mourns that. ‘T is an ill cure
For life’s worst ills, to have no time to feel them.
Where sorrow ‘s held intrusive and turned out,
There wisdom will not enter, nor true power,
Nor aught that dignifies humanity.
— Sir Henry Taylor (1800-?)
— Philip Van Artevelde, Part i, Act i, Sc. 5

Knives and scissors, fork and candle, little children should not handle.

“Whatever necessity lays upon thee, endure; whatever she commands, do.” — Johann Wolfgang Von Goethe (1749-1832)

“Every word is like an unnecessary stain on silence and nothingness.” — Beckett

The Master doesn’t talk, he acts, when his work is done, the people” say, “Amazing: We did it all by ourselves!” — Tao Te Ching

Okay, so much for the uplifting part of the day. I suppose it would be good to keep that trend moving, so I’ll actually go do something constructive today. Meanwhile, y’all take care out there…..

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Just Dozer

Kowabunga!

Cliches and platitudes and axioms, oh my!

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Ffolkes,
Having put in my time as a parent, I am accustomed to having no days off. I’m also accustomed to having Murphy practically living in my pocket, so that even with a day off, important stuff explodes in my face to take the off-day away. But, being retired, I have a new power; the power of the schedule. I am only responsible to myself, and can schedule whatever I want to do whenever I want to do it. This is no picayune power, as anyone who is retired can tell you. It is an amazing feeling, actually, being accountable only to one’s self for getting things done, and knowing that if I wish it, I can put things off pretty much as long as I want, as long as it doesn’t involve other folks. Or, conversely, I can do things right away, instead of waiting because something else needs done. It’s up to me, and that is a heady glass of wine…..So…..the purpose behind all this verbiage is to gently lead you into this announcement: I’m taking today off, sort of. I’m not writing anything here, nor after. This is all you get. Deal with it. Enjoy the Pearls…….

“It is necessary for the welfare of society that genius should be privileged to utter sedition, to blaspheme, to outrage good taste, to corrupt the youthful mind, and generally to scandalize one’s uncles.” — George Bernard Shaw

“Americans like to talk about (or be told about) Democracy but, when put to the test, usually find it to be an ‘inconvenience.’ We have opted instead for an authoritarian system *disguised* as a Democracy.  We pay through the nose for an enormous joke-of-a-government, let it push us around, and then wonder how all those assholes got in there.” —   Frank Zappa

A Headline in on a magazine at the supermarket read. “How to become an optimist in two weeks.  It was only after a moment that I realized that in response, I had muttered, “I don’t know.  That sounds pretty optimistic to me.”
(unknown, but it could have been me. Too bad I’m too honest to call it my own, but it just popped up without attribution.)

Ring out, ring out my mournful rhymes,
But ring the fuller minstrel in!
— Alfred Tennyson (1809-1892)
— In Memoriam, cv, Stanza 5

“There are several good protections against temptation, but the surest is cowardice.” — Mark Twain

“I would rather my ignorance be based on my understanding than for my understanding to be based on my ignorance. I would rather be a humorous fool than a serious jackass.” — Dan Millman “Way of the Peaceful Warrior”

I’m off to see the Lizard, the wonderful Lizard of Odd…..y’all take care out there…..

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Dozer

Kowabunga!