Watching the pot boil….

Ffolkes,
It is said, with good reason, that in order to be able to take care of someone else, you must first take care of yourself. That being the case, I certainly hope no one seriously needs my help, because I’m afraid I just don’t have anything to give. At least not in any financial sense. I have struggled a lot lately in that arena, and have been holding my own, for the most part. But circumstances, and Finagle’s prophet, the ever-slippery Murphy, have combined to make this month a whole new experience. It has also been said that in today’s world, we (the middle and lower financial classes) are but two paychecks away from living on the streets. I’m here to tell you, it may not take that long…..drastic measures are not just needed, they are critically essential. If I want to continue living indoors and eating on a regular basis, something has to give…..ah, well, griping about it isn’t going to help either, I suppose, so we’ll go on to bigger and better things. Something will come up, it always does; Murphy just likes to see me sweat…..today’s group took quite a bit of time and effort to gather; they were hiding deep, way back behind some rocks on the ocean floor, so it took several dives to drag them into the light of day…..enjoy!….

“A man begins cutting his wisdom teeth the first time he bites off more than he can chew.” — Herb Caen

“I see little divinity about them or you.  You talk to me of Christianity when you are in the act of hanging your enemies.  Was there ever such
blasphemous nonsense!” — George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950), The Devil’s Disciple
(This one is a response to much of what I’ve been reading about Dickless Cheney’s new book of memoirs)

I care not, Fortune, what you me deny:
You cannot rob me of free Nature’s grace,
You cannot shut the windows of the sky
Through which Aurora shows her brightening face;
You cannot bar my constant feet to trace
The woods and lawns, by living stream, at eve:
Let health my nerves and finer fibres brace,
And I their toys to the great children leave:
Of fancy, reason, virtue, naught can me bereave.
— James Thomson (1700-1748)
— The Castle of Indolence, Canto ii, Stanza 3

If you are patient in a moment of anger, you will escape a hundred days of sorrow. — Chinese Proverb

“Cucumber should be well sliced, and dressed with pepper and vinegar, and then thrown out, as good for nothing.” — Samuel Johnson

“Times are bad.  Children no longer obey their parents, and everyone is writing a book.”– Marcus Tullius Cicero (106-43 B.C.)

I suppose that means I should probably get mine finished. Book, that is…..meantime, y’all take care out there…..

 


Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.
gigoid

Dozer

Kowabunga!

At risk of bent principles…

Ffolkes,
Today’s subject line came to me when I was trying to find a way to describe what I have discovered these last few months, living on the edge of poverty. In some ways, it has been quite illuminating, once one can get past the bone-deep fear that seems to accompany this lifestyle.

‘This lifestyle’…..hmmph. Even that is euphemistic, a more delicate way to say what is actually true, to wit: living without money. As a middle-class citizen of this country, one gets accustomed to, and takes for granted, things that the lower income folks almost never see or have. Like plenty of money to buy food, after paying the most essential bills. Or enough to go out for a meal, or a movie, or just a drive. It’s hard to take a Sunday drive to see the sights, when there is no car; or if there is a car, it must only be used for work, with gas at $4/gallon. It’s hard to take in a movie, when one can’t even afford to have cable tv, if there is a tv to be had. Clean clothing becomes a luxury, when one lives without a washer & drier, and not enough cash to spare the $10-15 for the laundromat.

These are only the most obvious differences; the less obvious are nonetheless just as harmful to the spirit, degrading confidence and adding weight to the burdens already carried. Life then, for those in reduced circumstances (another euphemism….just how does one reduce one’s circumstances?), becomes a constant battle for survival, instead of a platform for growth. I can’t say that learning these life lessons is comfortable, nor can I say that I am learning them with grace; more of a growl. I find my spirit to be in constant need of rejuvenation; it keeps getting harder to find something about which I can feel hopeful. Each day brings another angry creditor to the door (figuratively speaking of course; thank goodness they haven’t started actually pounding at the door….. yet…).

Being the kind of person that I am, I know I will survive. But the shape of the future is not as clear as it used to be, hampered as I am by the fog of fear, and the constant distraction of having to find ways to live and spend less. It has been said that to be an artist, one must suffer….if that is even remotely true, then whatever work I am putting out in between periods of dithering about income vs. outgo, must be truly genius. I wish I could believe it is so…..

“Become what you are.” — Buddha

“In the vacant places, we will build with new bricks.” — T.S. Eliot

And after all, what is a lie? ‘T is but
The truth in masquerade.
— Lord Byron (1788-1824)
— Don Juan, Canto xi, Stanza 37

“Even if you’re on the right track, you’ll get run over if you just sit there.” — Will Rogers

“And it came to pass that in the hands of the ignorant, the words of the bible were used to beat plowshares into swords…” — Alan Watts

When you are down and out, all too often the thing that turns up is the noses of your former friends.

“He who has so little knowledge of human nature as to seek happiness by changing anything but his own disposition will waste his life in fruitless
efforts.”– Samuel Johnson (1709-1784)


Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.
gigoid
Dozer

Kowabunga!