Ffolkes,
What we have here…. is a failure… to germinate. So sad….. Actually, it’s germinating just fine. Seeds are like that; a bit of dirt, a little water, some sunshine, and voilá, germination! Now, if only there were some seeds germinating in my head, I’d be set for good. Alas, we should be so lucky…..

Sans germinating ideas, this intro section can turn on me at the drop of a simile, and apparently, has already done so. At this point, I have absolutely no idea what is going to come out next…. It could be a BEM (Bug Eyed Monster, to those of you not up on SF slang…). It could be another poem. (No, no, anything but that!….just shoot me now, please…..) It could be a fictional opening to a story. (If any were there to write down….) Or, it could be a series of paragraphs, each just a bit stranger than the last, all leading up to the usual point, where I give up, and we get started…..

I suppose strange is a relative term, and I ought not to consider it as an insult. In fact, given the rest of my life up to this point in time, I should probably consider it as encouragement, or perhaps, justification. For what, I don’t know, but, hey, it’s my party, and I can be ignorant if I want to be, so there…. Okay, now we’ve devolved into childish insults…. it must be time for the throwing up of the hands in disgust…. hold on, I need to step away from the computer to do this….. There, it’s done. I’ve washed my hands of this intro, and shall henceforth consider it as a part of the past, and no longer under my aegis…..

See? I told ya…. it worked out just the way I said it would, and here we are, finally arrived at the point where I look up with all innocence, and say, “Shall we Pearl?”….. you just nod your head, and move on to the next section…. well, go on…. you’d best go now, you’ll be alone if you stay here, and I won’t take responsibility if you get in trouble here on your own….. GO!!!!
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If God didn’t make homosexuals, there wouldn’t be any. ~~ Very Smart Bee

Aha! At last! I have found the answer to all those bigoted, so-called Christians, with their strident complaints about gay marriage being a threat to society, and the whole ridiculous skein of unfounded fears rooted in their own ignorance. Just mention the above to them, and watch them turn purple, as they try, over and over, to find some logical way to refute this…. which they can’t.

If they are going to insist on having an omnipotent God, then they can’t be telling him what He should and shouldn’t do, because He’s already done it…. This is a perfectly sound piece of doctrine, which I’m sure any Jesuit would tell you is so obvious, it could be considered dogma. They can’t have it both ways…. either there is a God, and homosexuals are part of the plan he has in place…. or there isn’t, and they need to find a whole new theory of the universe to follow, because this one won’t fly…..

“Do you think God gets stoned?  I think so…look at the Platypus.” — Robin Williams

I think it’s a lot more likely that what Robin says here is true; if there is a God, why wouldn’t he get stoned? Of course, those who have experienced the state of being stoned can make an informed judgment on that issue. Anyone who has never done so really has no right to an opinion, do they?

Aside from the simple, irrefutable fact that they, being mortal, cannot fathom God, or anything about Him/Her, how could they possibly have an opinion on something they’ve never experienced? I ask that question rhetorically, of course; they believe they have the right to sound off on anything they don’t understand, since, as they believe, they are the Lords of Creation…. what a crock!

“Faith means intense, usually confident, belief that is not based on evidence sufficient to command assent from every reasonable person.” — Walter Kaufmann

This pearl comes from the old school… it makes a point that logically becomes the next step in this little piece of satire… the point being this: The folks who spend their time fiddling with religion are pursuing a dream, one that has no basis in reality, according to all the evidence.

This kind of blind faith has a name these days, and that name is “delusional”, defined as holding on to a belief after being presented with absolute proof of its falsehood. Couple this delusional frame of mind with a strong sense of denial, and you have an entire segment of the population that is immune to change…. and we all know what the Universe does to any part of it that refuses to change, don’t we?…..

“I guess the rule is, if something’s too good to be true, then it’s probably too good to be true.” — Marshall, The ATM Machine, Eerie Indiana

And that’s the Truth! So, there! Thpppht! ~~ The little girl in the chair… (Lily Tomlin)
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Since the last pearl touched on the old school, I think I’ll make this pearl completely old school…. Here are some pearls that together form an idea, one that is always handy to have in one’s arsenal in the fight to hold our place in reality….. or at least to reluctantly accept it as it is…..

“A man who carries a cat by the tail is getting experience that will always be helpful.  He isn’t likely to grow dim or doubtful.  Chances are, he isn’t likely to carry the cat that way again, either.  But if he wants to, I say let him!” — Mark Twain

Hope is the thing with feathers
That perches in the soul
And sings the tune without the words
And never stops at all.

And sweetest in the gale is heard;
And sore must be the storm
That could abash the little bird
That kept so many warm.

I’ve heard it in the chillest land
And on the strangest sea,
Yet never in extremity
It asked a crumb of me.

— Emily Dickinson

“Hope cannot be said to exist, nor can it be said not to exist. It is just like the roads across the earth. For actually there were no roads to begin with, but when many people pass one way a road is made.” — Lu Hsun

“We live only to discover beauty. All else is a form of waiting.” — Kahlil Gibran

“America!!  I saw it all!!  Vomiting!  Waving!  JERRY FALWELLING into your void tube of UHF oblivion!!  SAFEWAY of the mind –” — Zippy the Pinhead

Lastly, we turn once again to that philosophical genius, Lily T, to bring us home in style……

“The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you’re still a rat.” — Lily Tomlin
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“A little rudeness and disrespect can elevate a meaningless interaction to a battle of wills and add drama to an otherwise dull day.” — Calvin

Ah, politics! Calvin (of Calvin & Hobbes, I believe….) has accurately stated the operating techniques of both parties in this election. I was amazed the other day when the Republican candidates started to harp on how mean and unfair the other side was being. Talk about two kettles calling the pots black!

I also had to laugh when the Democrats got called out for demanding to see the taxes that Romney continues to withhold; he really thinks he is going to get away with not showing them, and doesn’t seem to have a clue as to how much damage it causes his campaign every time he refuses to show them…. I don’t know why, because he reads the polls, and every time he puts it off again, he drops points; it’s a direct correlation, but he doesn’t seem to know, or care….. idiot….

“That men do not learn very much from the lessons of history is the most important of all the lessons of history.” — Aldous Huxley (1894-1963), Collected Essays

Romney and Ryan keep accusing Obama of stealing money from Social Security, when the Congressional Report on the plan shows this to be completely false.  John Sunnunu, governor of something or other, a life-time political hack, got his sails trimmed by a CNN reporter, on air, who kept throwing this falsehood back in his face…. he ended up resorting to name-calling, and continued to try to blame the POTUS for everything. Even when it was pointed out to him that the Ryan Plan and the Romney Plan were the same, and both contained tax cuts for the rich, he tried to say they were different…. another idiot….

“I have been thinking that I would make a proposition to my Republican friends…that if they will stop telling lies about the Democrats, we  will stop telling the truth about them.” — Adlai Stevenson

Or was it Joe Biden who said that? Well, he could have…. What Mr. Stevenson says here is all too true, even today, though he doesn’t quite make it all the way to honesty, as he implies that only the Democrats tell the truth. In fact, BOTH parties are more comfortable telling us lies than they are with the truth; it is fortunate for us that the WWW has provided us with a way to keep the truth at the forefront of any issue, no matter how many times one of the pundits, right or left, tries to convince us that the lies they are telling are truth. For those libertarians to whom truth is more important than personal comfort, the web has been a true gift of the gods…..

“The only sure bulwark of continuing liberty is  a government strong enough to protect the interests of the people, and a people strong enough and well enough informed to maintain its sovereign control over the government.” — Franklin Delano Roosevelt

These are perfect words to bring this to a close…. We, the citizens of this democracy, have the responsibility of making ourselves aware of the truth, and to insist on that truth being acknowledged by the government, whichever party may be incumbent. If we do not take the time to investigate what they tell us, and accept what they say as truth, without checking, then we deserve whatever kind of government we get.

I can’t stress enough that people need to be aware that politicians, of both varieties, DO NOT HAVE OUR BEST INTERESTS AT HEART….. Elected officials only have their own interests at heart; this has been proven over and over, and really isn’t arguable. But, as long as people continue to act as if the pundits care about them, then they will continue to get the shaft…. and deservedly so…..

“TAPPING?  You POLITICIANS!  Don’t you realize that the END of the “Wash Cycle” is a TREASURED MOMENT for most people?!” — Zippy the Pinhead
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I was right in the intro…. it kind of got away from me…. But, I think I managed to pull it all together, with only moderate use of duct tape…. It’s going to have to do, because, well, because it will….. Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you….