Such beauty lives without shame….

Posted on October 14, 2012 by gigoid

Ffolkes,
I love rice. I do. It is so versatile as a food…. it can be eaten as a side dish, complementing an entree item. Add some sauce and veggies, meat, and cheese to it, and you have a lovely risotto. Dress it with a vinaigrette and some garden specialties, and you’ve got a cold salad for an afternoon lawn event. If you enjoy the nutty flavor of a good rice, it can be eaten as is, too….. And, I am sick to death of it…. I know now why so many folks in the throes of poverty use it so much, along with beans, and pasta…..

A little of it goes a long way to stretch other foods, it’s cheap, compared to many other staples, and it takes longer for the family to get tired of it, as long as one is creative in the kitchen…. But, I swear, when I can afford more food, rice will go to the bottom of the list, merely because I am so incensed at having to eat it every day to stay alive, and not giving in to the temptation to steal…. It is surprising, perhaps, to realize how quickly one’s ethics and morals can be put aside when one is hungry and angry….. bad combination, I can attest….

Ah well, life could be worse, I’m sure…. It could be that I couldn’t afford the rice, and had to subsist on beans… Now, THAT would be tragic, not to mention the danger to the public…. I mean, I already have a pretty heavy reaction, methane gas-wise, when I consume beans… even refried beans can cause some serious toots. If I am forced to eat more beans, I’m not sure the walls of this apartment will stand up to the volume under pressure that is engendered in my bowels by vegetable protein…. and the effect of both the noise and the odoriferous output on my neighbors is bound to be considerable, given that I would have very little control over when such outbreaks would occur….. It could turn into a Keystone Kops type event in a flash…..

So, I try to stick to pasta and rice for my staple starches. It’s best for everyone if I do…. Hmmm…. I just realized, in reading back over this morning’s introductory remarks, that I may have strayed into the TMI category….. not everyone thinks body functions are funny…. Nurses do, for sure, and healthcare workers of any kind can develop such a basic appreciation for the less public aspects of our physical processes….. The rest of society, however, seems to have an objection to body fluids, and the humor they can provide….

I noticed this difference once when I had surgery, to remove a piece of evil from my midsection…. After abdominal surgery of any kind, the first thing the doctor and nurses want to see happen is for the intestines to resume function; this is indicated by the build-up, and passage of gas. Thus, it becomes a point of interest, and even enthusiasm, when the nurse is first informed of any such activity by a surgical patient… in other words, nurses are the only group people who get happy and enthused to learn that people are farting…. Kinda get ya, right here, doesn’t it?….. (points at his heart….)

Okay, that’s enough fart humor for one day, such as it is…. It doesn’t affect me negatively at all, having been privy to its charm for many years from my nursing experiences, but I know that it can affect others detrimentally. I’ve been informed of such by many folks, just before they storm out of a room in high dudgeon, miffed because the conversation turned to phlegm, or other such delightful substances that the human body is wont to produce at times. Silly humans…..

I have a feeling I had best get on with the normal business of the day, before there isn’t anyone left to read it….. Shall we Pearl?…..
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“Finding the occasional straw of truth awash in a great ocean of confusion and bamboozle requires intelligence, vigilance, dedication and courage. But if we don’t practice these tough habits of thought, we cannot hope to solve the truly serious problems that face us — and we risk becoming a nation of suckers, up for grabs by the next charlatan who comes along.” — Carl Sagan, “The Fine Art of Baloney Detection,” Parade, February 1, 1987

Unfortunately, Baloney Detectors became out of style….. No one listened to Carl, and we are STILL recovering from exactly what he pointed out could happen. As soon as Clinton left office, after leaving the first budget surplus ever, Bush 1 took over and proceeded to give Reaganomics another try; the first time they hadn’t stolen quite as much as the figures showed they could, so they had to go back for all that money. Along the way, they jacked the budget deficit back up a couple trillion dollars, and turned it over to Shrub 2, who decided to spend us completely into oblivion, starting two wars, all because he was covering for the crap his father pulled to keep his theft of the 2000 election out of public scrutiny….. Whew, sorry, didn’t realize there was so much indignation to pack into one paragraph summarizing the Republican meltdowns of the American economy…. which they continue to try to blame on anybody but themselves and the Bushes, much less Saint Ronnie….. the asshole….

Don’t forget, I knew Ronnie before he got to the Presidency…. he was governor when I went to college…. I was one of the ones he was talking about when he made the remarks regarding turning student protests into blood baths…. Mind you, these were PEACE protests, against the war in Vietnam….. I was there when he and his oh-so-sweet wife Nancy made their undisguised play for their chain of facilities to garner a monopoly on the mental healthcare market, by changing the laws to turn mental patients out of the state hospitals, back to their counties, where the facilities owned by the Reagan demons were the only available places to put them…. In case you wondered, they were called Heavenly Manor I believe, and the state-registered owner of record was Nancy Reagan…. even though her husband started, supported, and signed bills to try to make it happen…. No nepotism there at all, eh?….

I never trusted Reagan, ever since he got out-acted by that ape in that movie back in the 40’s where he was the world’s most unconvincing college student (well, his ditziness in the role seemed to be an accurate display of character, but you know what I mean…. he just wasn’t very real, and looked like he was made of cardboard….) His actions as governor were clearly anti-American, and yet people for some reason loved him. It didn’t surprise me at all when it came out that his administration was one of the crookedest ever, and hid more from the public than even the rest of government was comfortable with….

None of this mentions how disastrous his economic policies were; you remember, don’t you? Ronnie was fond of the term, “trickle down” theory, a policy he espoused in which, according to Ronnie’s strange math, giving huge breaks to the richest would result in more money “trickling down” to the rest of society…. Well, guess what folks? It didn’t work, nor could it ever have worked, because there is no “trickle down” where it concerns money, and those who covet it…. they will hold on to every little bit they can, and cry for more if threatened….

I realize the view I am presenting is far different than what you might see in history books of the time, or even what some conservatives who idolize Reagan will want to remember, but none of what I’ve said is based on anything that I didn’t see happening myself; it’s all documented stuff, on the nightly news in somebody’s archives. What goes in the books is what all the folks in power decided to say happened, not what actually occurred.

If most folks knew, or even thought about, what actually happened for most of history, they would think they’d been lied to their entire lives…. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! They HAVE! It cracks me up, a little bit, when I’m done being sad, just how little truth is EVER told by those in positions of power over others in society. Lying and cheating are pre-requisite habits, and sheer necessities, in getting into the positions they hold, and they aren’t about to stop once installed in office with the treasury keys in their pockets.

So, go ahead and believe, if you will, that the beloved ruling class, epitomized so darkly and accurately by the Republican Party in the last 40 years, is on your side, and is working hard to make your lives better…. They will go on stripping you of every freedom the founding fathers gave us, along with all your money, and your hope for a brighter future, because they DON’T CARE! Not about you, or anything that you believe; they care about themselves, and how much power they can accumulate in their lifetime. They don’t even THINK about what it may cost anyone else…. they don’t consider anyone else’s benefit or interests, at all, ever….. And that is the truth, whether you can accept it or not…..

“Food for thought is no substitute for the real thing.” — Walt Kelly, Potluck Pogo
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In my poems, I am trying to get to a point where everything extraneous is stripped away, leaving only the most powerful words to portray my meaning…. I’m getting a bit better, but I’ve a way to go yet, to my way of looking at it, which, as we know, is all that matters, since I’m the one writing it…. I don’t know if I’ll ever be as good at it as I’d like…. but, the following poem, from Ogden Nash, certainly demonstrates the concept that I’m trying to get to…. If I can ever come even close to the sheer genius of this poem, I will be happy….

This was my dream;
I dreampt it.
I dreamed that my hair was kempt,
and my true love unkempt it.

— Ogden Nash

See? Sheer genius! With four tiny lines, he connected to the most lovely and compelling dream shared by ALL men…. completely amazing, and to my way of looking at things, the kind of power that literature should always have…. not that it will…. But, if everyone who writes shoots for at least the same kind of inspiration, and won’t settle for crap, at least we could conceivably see more poetry like this…. and that would be a good thing, yes?….. Yes….
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Another old-school pearl, with some observations on Life, the Folks who inhabit the planet, and the stuff they find to keep busy…..

“Among the rich you will never find a really generous man even by accident. They may give their money away, but they will never give themselves away; they are egotistic, secretive, dry as old bones. To be smart enough to get all that money you must be dull enough to want it.” — G. K. Chesterton, A Miscellany of Men

“Never mind what I said,” the Lord spake. “Doth thou listen to every crazy idea that comes thy way?”
And Abraham grew ashamed. “Er — not really… no.”
“I jokingly suggest thou sacrifice Isaac and thou immediately runs out to do it.”
And Abraham fell to his knees, “See, I never know when you are kidding.”
And the Lord thundered, “No sense of humor. I can’t believe it.”
— Without Feathers — Woody Allen
(This is probably a far more accurate portrayal of what took place than what we find in either the Bible, or the Qur’an, both of which talk extensively about Abraham, and his relations with God, or Allah, take your pick…. It seems more true to human nature, somehow…..and, if God exists, I would like to think he has a sense of humor. If not, we are in deep shit…..)

“Let us begin by committing ourselves to the truth – to see it like it is, and tell it like it is -to find the truth, to speak the truth, and live the truth.” — Richard Nixon, accepting the Presidential Nomination, 1968
(I laughed aloud when he said this, but later, I cried….. in looking at it now, in retrospect, this actually rivals the crap that Romney has been spouting….. and I can see how he, and others, got the idea they can get away with this kind of shit…..)

“Liberty cannot be guaranteed by law. Nor by any thing else except the resolution of free citizens to defend their liberties.” — Edward Abbey
(This had to go here, just to counter balance the severe level of BS that Tricky Dicky raised in one sentence…..)

Extremes in nature equal ends produce;
In man they join to some mysterious use.
— Alexander Pope (1688-1744) — Essay on Man, Epistle ii, Line 205

“Americans like to talk about (or be told about) Democracy but, when put to the test, usually find it to be an ‘inconvenience.’ We have opted instead for an authoritarian system *disguised* as a Democracy. We pay through the nose for an enormous joke-of-a-government, let it push us around, and then wonder how all those assholes got in there.” — Frank Zappa

“He who knows best knows how little he knows.” — Thomas Jefferson

Well, that should be enough…. It’s a rather meandering concept, but it gets there eventually….. and if not, well, it’s always a good time trying to figure out just what dark alleyway of the human psyche I have wandered into, or out of, as the case may be…. Here, we have a combination plate…. enjoy! Oh, and it WILL be on the Quiz….
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I’d say this isn’t too bad, but then, I have inside knowledge of what it took to produce it….. which included a pain level rather larger than normal, by a factor of about two (i.e., double the morning dose….) I hate grunting when I stand up and walk; I feel like an ape. One with an irritable disposition, to be sure…. Growling just becomes a natural response when all one wants to do is to be able to straighten up without going into spasms…. and the thought of human interaction is just plain scary. I will have to avoid all contact with folks while on my trip to the library to post today…. I don’t think I want to deal with blood today, mine or anyone else’s….

Ah well, life goes on, and we must take it as it plays out….. My apologies in advance today, for not being able to spend any time perusing other blogs…. it will be all I can do to get this up and posted, so it will have to wait for another day…. Probably for the best anyway, my concentration is shot…. Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you…..

—

Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Kowabunga!

Savory bytes of digital dessert….

Posted on October 12, 2012 by gigoid

Ffolkes,
One hopes, given an even chance, that life will be fair…. it is a fool’s hope, to be sure, one smashed on a regular basis by reality, yet it is never driven completely away, nor smashed so thoroughly that it disappears. Each of us will hang on to this hope well beyond the point where it is never going to happen, even though we know it is foolish…. and then will feel badly, because it did not happen. We place far too much importance on a quality of life that doesn’t exist in reality, and bemoan our fate when it fails to materialize…. We ARE a bunch of mopes, aren’t we?….

It’s part of our charm, I suppose, to hope for what we cannot have, for what we really hope for is justice. Human nature craves justice, and deplores its absence, even though it is only a creation of our minds, and has no real existence other than as a human quality, or judgment. The universe is completely indifferent to such ideas, and will not act in any fashion to either support, or deny, any such concepts. It is only by human intervention does justice, and fairness, occur, and people need to understand this more clearly than they do. So many people expect the world to be fair, when it is merely a human desire to force the universe to meet our wishes that fairness exists at all. Mama Nature just doesn’t give a shit…. and that is a fact, a natural law, not subject to either debate or change….

So, it behooves us all to, a) stop using words like behooves, grand as it is…. and b) quit being a pack of idiots, when it comes to expecting reality to fit our notions of what it should be. It just isn’t going to happen, and hoping and wishing is NOT going to turn the tide in your favor, no sir…… not even a little bit. We may as well get used to it, and get over it….

Well, that was certainly a rude awakening…. so to speak. The previous three paragraphs were apparently sitting in there, just panting to get out and onto the screen, as they just flowed out, first thing after sitting down this morning…. That is a good thing, omen-wise, but a bit of a facer for me to realize how unconscious this whole process really is sometimes…. Ah well, going with the flow is the ONLY way to fly, or float, as the case may be….. Shall we Pearl?…..

“I’m not paranoid – just a student of history.” — Smart Bee
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“I am patient with stupidity but not with those who are proud of it.” — Edith Sitwell

Well, there you go….. that about sums it up perfectly, don’t you think? I do…. I’ve also heard it said that stupidity has a certain charm, but deliberate stupidity is boring and without redeeming value. I can agree with both of these strongly, as they are congruent with my own feelings on the subject, which I’ve developed over too many years of dealing with said condition. It’s a sad state, but not always a choice, so some slack has to be given. And will be, always, up until that slack is taken up with manipulative intent, or with just plain laziness, either of which will earn my immediate disdain, followed closely by an appropriate response, with my own self providing the parameters for appropriate….

“Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of Truth and Knowledge is shipwrecked by the laughter of the gods.” — Albert Einstein

I also hold this to be true, which is why I feel justified in my former statements. I try not to judge people too harshly, especially if they are challenged by holding more than one opposing idea at once without yielding to belief without evidence, or at least suspending belief until more data is collected. Now, that may sound a bit elitist, but not if you consider that I hold myself to the same standards, and in fact, find myself shipwrecked a lot, with the echo of laughter ringing in my ears….. and from these life lessons, I’ve tried to learn. Not learning, by choice, is what I object to in folks who otherwise are capable of doing so, when not learning causes harm to others, or themselves, or the universe at large. Which it does. A lot….

yOU HAve OfFIcialLY eNTereD tHe PRepoStERous ZonE. — Smart Bee

This is how I often feel, especially after cruising Facebook of late, and seeing some of the sheer ignorance that passes for conservative conversation of late. I’ll see a posting from someone who normally seems to have a brain cell or two that work together on occasion, a posting that, usually, repeats one of Romney’s lies or distortions about Obama (such as the birther nonsense, or blaming the lack of jobs on him, when it is the Republican Congress that has blocked any jobs reform laws 104 times in the last two years, while coincidentally voting FOR increases in military spending for wars we no longer are pursuing…..). I don’t bother to comment on these posts; it only encourages them, but it saddens me to see just how ignorance can be passed on so easily….

“A great many people think they are thinking when they are merely rearranging their prejudices.” — William James

In fact, this sort of rearrangement is what the people of whom I just spoke are engaged in when they post those lies from their bigoted, racist hero, the Great White Hope, who shall save all the white Christians from the big bad black man with the silver tongue…. They are so caught up in their fears that they don’t even realize, and would never admit, their racism and bigotry…. In fact, their usual reaction to such accusations is to accuse their detractors in turn, calling them unpatriotic, or traitors, other such supposedly derogatory terms….. I don’t know about y’all, but it always makes me feel pretty good to have one of them call me a name, as it means that what I’ve said got through to them, and stimulated a response, even if it is only a defensive one….

“The sky is not less blue because a blind man does not see it.” — Danish Proverb

Nor does a lie become the truth by repetition, despite what the Republican Party, or the Democrats, for that matter, would have us believe. I am thoroughly convinced that the beloved ruling class of this country (and don’t even try to tell me there isn’t one….) truly believes they can tell the American public whatever they wish, and they will be believed, as long as they repeat it enough times…. Sadly, they have been proven correct, as millions upon millions of fearful people attach themselves to the candidate who promises to replace that which they fear with their own programs and policies…. no matter how destructive those policies will be to themselves…. Stupidity has become the greatest political tool of the twentieth, and now the twenty-first century, both in the candidate pool, and the voting public….

“Opinions founded on prejudice are always sustained with the greatest violence.” — Hebrew Proverb

Since we are using pearls from around the world, perhaps one might think that it does not apply to American politics; this would be a mistake, for American politics has evolved into its current state by mirroring what happens in the rest of the world. What, for example is the solution, according to the Republican Party’s platform, to the question of birth control, and/or overpopulation…. Why, denial, of course, of the root causes, and then let’s go blow up a Planned Parenthood building. This can be done after passing laws to take women’s healthcare issues away from women, and place it in the hands of misogynistic men…. How to handle terrorism? Why, let’s go bomb some more little brown people somewhere else in the world, sending some of our finest young people to sacrifice themselves at the altar of the Almighty Dollar while we are at it….

“Politicians are like diapers. They both need changing regularly and for the same reason.” — Smart Bee

If you can’t tell, I am getting a bit incensed…. which is not uncommon when I start in on the political scene as it currently is being played out. I’m going to end this rant here, as it is getting me somewhat worked up, and I’m quite emotional enough already, thanks very much…. I know, I know, I’m the one who started talking about a subject that I know will get me going…. but, it all needs to be said, ffolkes, and I’m the one to say it…. Get out there and vote…. I hope you will vote on the side of reason and tolerance, rather than siding with ignorance and fear, but, as long as you vote, at least you have the right to an opinion…. Try thinking…. it may hurt at first, but it will lessen, the more you keep at it….

“When you are a Bear of Very Little Brain, and you Think of Things, you find sometimes that a Thing which seemed very Thingish inside you is quite different when it gets out into the open and has other people looking at it.” — A.A. Milne, The House at Pooh Corner

“Democracy, which is a charming form of government, full of variety and disorder, and dispensing a sort of equality to equals and unequals alike.” — Plato, The Republic. Book VIII. 558
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Nothing bubbling up from my head’s hidden depths today, I’m afraid…. or perhaps that is relief?…. Any who, I need something to feed that part of me that craves verse, so, here is some…. Nash Hash….

Come On In, The Senility Is Fine

People live forever in Jacksonville and St. Petersburg and Tampa,
But you don’t have to live forever to become a grampa.
The entrance requirements for grampahood are comparatively mild,
You only have to live until your child has a child.
From that point on you start looking both ways over your shoulder,
Because sometimes you feel thirty years younger and sometimes thirty years older.
Now you begin to realize who it was that reached the height of imbecility,
It was whoever said that grandparents have all the fun and none of the responsibility.
This is the most enticing spiderwebs of a tarradiddle ever spun,
Because everybody would love to have a baby around who was no responsibility and lots of fun,
But I can think of no one but a mooncalf or a gaby
Who would trust their own child to raise a baby.
So you have to personally superintend your grandchild from diapers to pants and from bottle to spoon,
Because you know that your own child hasn’t sense enough to come in out of a typhoon.
You don’t have to live forever to become a grampa, but if you do want to live forever,
Don’t try to be clever; If you wish to reach the end of the trail with an uncut throat,
Don’t go around saying Quote I don’t mind being a grampa but I hate being married to a gramma Unquote.

— Ogden Nash
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“Become what you are.” — Buddha

How powerful is that? How deep is his understanding of human nature, and of our place in the scheme of things? There is none of this, “Do right, and you shall be rewarded”….. No “Do wrong, and you shall be punished.” No “The almighty God is a jealous God, and craves, nay, insists upon, your worship.” No “Send me money, and you will be saved!” Just, be yourself, just the way you are, and things will work out… Now, that’s MY kind of religion! If I had one, that is….

I’m not entirely certain that Buddhism meets ALL the requirements to be called a religion, anyway. It’s kinda relaxed about the whole thing, actually, not lending itself well to manipulative pressure on people to do or say any particular thing. Dogma seems to be lacking in their writings, and, in fact, seems to be assiduously avoided in all their efforts at educating people about what they believe. You won’t see any monks going door to door seeking converts, not in any traditional sense…. their way is more a matter of living the way they believe, and inviting others to watch, and join in if they wish…. but, if not, no worries, mate…..

Oh, I’m sure they end up with their share of bozos, but, in general, that is sort of self-limiting, as one of the basic tenets of the philosophy is that each person should undergo a constant state of self-examination, to determine if what they are doing is in harmony with the rest of the universe. This kind of introspection is not merely uncommon, it is often discouraged by more traditional religions, as introspection can lead to independent thinking, and gasp!, rejection of dogmatic, self-destructive religious laws. Can’t have the constituency thinking on their own, there’s no telling what they’ll discover…. and since control is what they are all about, thinking is heavily discouraged in most religious cults. “The Bible says God said it, I believe it, and that’s the end of it!” Brilliant logic, eh?….

Ah, me…. I’m such a curmudgeon, sometimes…. I start off in praise of Buddha, and end up ranting on fundies again…. It’s just so easy! I mean, they are the ones who insist on trying to stuff their insanity down everyone else’s throats, then complain that their rights are being denied because they have to listen to anyone else’s opinion on anything….. Frustrating, for those of us who bump neurons against each other regularly, to view the effects of long-term starvation on a human brain that has been denied truth for so long…. So, in the interests of tolerance, and fairness (which, as I amply stated above, is up to ALL of us to ensure….), I’ll let this die a natural death, before I start on anyone else…. There are just so many good targets out there, it is hard to resist sometimes….

“If I had my life to live over again, I’d be a plumber.” — Albert Einstein (You KNOW it’s a good pearl if it has Buddha and Albert to bookend it…. and in this case, though the Buddha is absolutely right, I’m with Albert…. Actually, if I think about it, and I can’t help doing so, what the Buddha said applies to plumbers just as well as to anyone, so…. go with the flow, as it were….)
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And in your dreams you can see yourself
As a prophet saving the world
The words from your lips
I just can’t believe you are such
A fool.
— Frank Zappa, “Oh No”.

No, I’m not such a fool, though I do enjoy spouting off words that, if heeded, could conceivably serve to work toward saving the world…. My dreams, however, don’t assume that as a foregone conclusion, so I’m safe from foolishness in this particular instance. I’m happy with the above, mostly; I cannot always make that claim….. 🙂 Ah well, So Be It…. I’m not in a space to worry about it, so this will be going out as is, when I can get down to the library…. Here’s hoping something herein has tickled your fancy, or stimulated a random thought…. that’s all we’re shooting for around here….. Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you…..

—

Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Kowabunga!

Evolution is charged prix fixe….

Posted on October 9, 2012 by gigoid

Ffolkes,
It’s a long road to Tipperary, so it is said…. It is certainly taking me long enough to get there. Of course, I’ve been somewhere near there every night, it seems, in dreams, but it just isn’t the same. I’m guessing that the fact that traveling to Ireland is so much on my mind has to do with wanting so badly to be able to do so, or, for that matter, to be able to travel ANYWHERE!….. I’m going stir crazy sitting here in one place for so long. I’ve traveled enough in my life to know that it is perhaps my greatest joy, if one doesn’t count my children, or love. Take those out of the calculation, and it wins, hands down, as my absolute favorite thing to do…. and don’t even go there…. I know what you’re thinking, but this is a family blog, and children will read it (hopefully….)….. So, pull your mind out of the gutter, and we’ll go on…. 🙂

No doubt, this is related to the fact that I love to learn, and travel is by far the best way to do that, right in front of, or perhaps next to, a good book. Meeting new people, seeing new lands, experiencing new cultures, all are sheer ambrosia to my mind, and I can barely contain my desire to be off whenever I think of it….. But, until Social Security decides to get off their collective ass and award me the money I have in their bank, that I’ve been pouring in there for damn near 50 years, I’m stuck here in Vallejo, scraping for food each month, and not enough to even go to the City, much less to Oregon to see my friend, or even Sonoma to see my kids, a half-hour away… it is indeed a pisser, to borrow a mild word from the darker side of today’s street culture…..

End of whine for one day…. even I get tired of it….. Plus, I can always tell when I’m short on material, as I start writing about personal stuff…. it’s the egotist in me, I suppose, or an outgrowth of the blog state of mind. Whatever it may be, it is a bit embarrassing, so I’ll take myself off into a different subject area, and leave the personal behind for now. I’m sure there must be SOMETHING to write about…. A dive for pearls should take care of things….. Shall we Pearl?….

(Even if I don’t agree with Henry David about traveling, and I don’t….. what he says here is true, but only as far as he takes it…. I’ve always thought that he would have been a lot better philosopher, and a happier guy, if he had just gotten away from home now and then, and compared his own thoughts to what he saw in the world…. But, his own ego either could not stand the comparison, or was delusional in believing itself to be superior, just because he held it apart like he did….. He sure did have a way with words, though…..)

“Nay, be a Columbus to whole new continents and worlds within you, opening new channels, not of trade, but of thought.” – Henry David Thoreau, “Walden, Ch. 18 Conclusion”
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Naturally, the first pearl in this morning’s dive that I come across stimulates a cascade of memories, all personal…. let’s see where it takes us…..

the average person is average
the common people is common
the straight people is straight
you gone be the crooked weird
rare intelligent bird creep type
that what you gone be, honey
— A. R. Ammons

I’ve never heard or seen this before, but it perfectly describes how I felt a lot of the time when I was a kid, from my first year in school. I guess I wasn’t supposed to learn to read before I started…. But, I had, so they were stuck with me. Besides, there I was, and there all those books were, and there was no way they were going to get me away from the library, once I had discovered it. I distinctly remember the thrill when I checked out a book for the first time….

Any who, that little idiosyncrasy sort of set the tone for the rest of my life, in many ways, so I’ve learned to be pretty flexible when dealing with people, as there are so many different reactions I encounter to my oddities (I won’t bore you with an extensive list; trust me, there are enough to cause talk….). I am somewhat aided in that I really do like people, in general, and individually. It is mostly when they are acting as a group that my issues with standards of behavior arise, so as long as I don’t get into crowds too often, nobody suffers….. 🙂

Of course, it must be understood, when I say I like people as a rule, we are not talking here at all about either politicians, or preachers; as you know, to me, they belong to an entirely different segment of humanity, separate from the rest of us, and subject to separate standards of behavioral expectations…. the assholes…. but, I digress….

I’m strange, I admit it. I also admit that I enjoy it, and actively pursue ways to augment that strangeness, making it, hopefully, as much of an attraction as it is a shield, or barrier, to others. Being an odd duck doesn’t preclude having the same need as other folks, and ffolkes…. i.e., the need for approval from our society’s other members…. it just makes that need a bit harder to fulfill at times. But, one can cultivate and express eccentricity without engendering fear, and that is my goal…. I don’t want to scare babies, I just don’t want to be a clone of anyone else….. thus becoming predictable, God forbid!

(Is it legal for me to say that? I don’t know for sure, maybe it is, maybe not…. I know Church and State are still theoretically separate, but there may be areas of overlap, as occur so frequently when the idiots in Washington, and/or Sacramento, decide they want to take another shot at legislating morality…. I am merely unsure whether it is currently allowed by statute for us atheistic, agnostic, doubting Thomas types to use such epithets, as used by the devout…. I know it creates an issue of irony, or perhaps, sardonicism, or even, GASP!, unintentionally congruent plagiarism, but to my knowledge, there are still no laws against those. But, you never know, in these days leading up to the world’s demise, anything can happen…..)

Now that I’ve most likely lost everyone, or at least confused them…. including myself….. I just wanted to say a few things about being ‘the crooked weird rare intelligent bird creep type’ (I’m not sure I like the ‘creep’ part; the rest is very cool….)…. because it is a role I’ve always embraced with enthusiasm. I’ve never seen any point in being Normal; the further one gets from Normal, the more odd Normal becomes, as it is dragged, willy-nilly, in the direction of each extreme, by each person who goes there…. that is what makes it ‘Normal’, you see? So, I’m just doing all I can to make sure ‘Normal’ is constantly in flux, and doesn’t, in and of, and all by itself, become too predictable….. This is not to imply that Reality really needs my help, but, I try to go with the flow, know what I mean?…..

“Normativity (sic… but I like it…) is like a brown paper bag — you never know what’s inside. It could be apple pie or a ticking time bomb. Give me a world with colorful packaging so I can glimpse the contents inside.” — Callan Williams
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For two or three days now, I’ve felt a poem percolating somewhere in the dark regions of my head, but it doesn’t seem to be ready yet for me to open up a vein and let it out, and nothing else is floating up to the surface that I have been able to put into anything that passes my crap detector…. So, you’ll have to settle for someone else…. since I’m sitting at home, I don’t yet know who that might be, as it could change by the time I get access to Google and the Net. Whoever it is, I’ll try to keep it within the parameters of today’s apparent theme of the Strange, and avoiding the Normal….. maybe some Ogden Nash, he’s the prototype for that…. Enjoy!…..

A Caution To Everybody

Consider the auk;
Becoming extinct because he forgot how to fly, and could only walk.
Consider man, who may well become extinct
Because he forgot how to walk and learned how to fly before he thinked.

Ogden Nash

Perfect!
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In keeping with today’s theme, as it evolved, I offer these pearls…. each is, of course, a stand-alone thought, but I let my whimsy dictate which would go well together to further demonstrate my devotion to illogic and it’s concomitant companion, crooked reasoning…. which, crooked though it may be, still has a direct link to Reality…. especially in today’s society, which goes much further than I have ever gone down the path to Strange….

“No matter how much cynicism you have, it is never enough to keep up.” — Lily Tomlin

“But a short time elapsed after the death of the great reformer of the Jewish religion, before his principles were departed from by those who professed to be his special servants, and perverted into an engine for enslaving mankind, and aggrandizing their oppressors in Church and State.” — Thomas Jefferson, [letter?] To S. Kercheval, 1810

“The fact that an opinion has been widely held is no evidence whatever that it is not utterly absurd; indeed in view of the silliness of the majority of mankind, a widespread belief is more likely to be foolish than sensible.” — Bertrand Russell, Marriage and Morals

“Great spirits have often encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds.” — Albert Einstein (1879-1955)

“The late rebellion in Massachusetts has given more alarm than I think it should have done. Calculate that one rebellion in 13 states in the course of 11 years, is but one for each state in a century and a half. No country should be so long without one.” — Thomas Jefferson (1743-1826), in letter to James Madison, 20 December 1787

‘But he hasn’t got any clothes on,’ a little boy said. — from The Emperor’s New Clothes by Hans Christian Andersen

“Remember that man’s life lies all within this present, as ‘t were but a hair’s-breadth of time; as for the rest, the past is gone, the future yet unseen. Short, therefore, is man’s life, and narrow is the corner of the earth wherein he dwells.” — Marcus Aurelius Antoninus (121-180 AD) — Meditations, iii, 10

Well, there you go…. If you can’t make heads or tails of it, don’t sweat it. None of it will be on the Quiz….. But, if you let your mind drift as you consider the parts of the pearl as a whole concept, you just might find that you’ve hit upon a very deep, very ancient, immensely valuable insight into not only the nature of Man, but your own nature as well…. and if not, well, have some chocolate, and you can at least feel the same way…..
__________________________________

All things considered, this Pearl achieved a certain degree of salvation…. Perhaps because the subject matter morphed into one of my favorite areas of discourse, i.e. the world’s propensity to encourage odd ducks, as a balancing factor in the overall Reality of human nature. Or, perhaps because the coffee kicked in, and my brain caught up to…. well, never mind, it wasn’t that, obviously…… I discover, as I type, that I’m still a bit behind…. That’s okay, I’m used to being out of step, so all is well. It must be, because I’m done….. Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you…..

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Kowabunga!

Rejecting all palliative measures…..

Posted on September 9, 2012 by gigoid

Ffolkes,
Today’s post will be a strange one, for both sides of this coin. I’m very late getting to where I can hook up to the internet, so I’ll be rushing through the pearling process. That’s my strange… your strange is whatever comes out the other end, the finished product (if it can be so labeled….). And I don’t even have time to discuss it very much here in the intro, or I won’t get to the rest of the pearls…. SIGH… amazing how many things I can find to whine about, eh?

Sorry, got distracted… today I’m sitting in the room at the coffee place that looks outdoors, and a gorgeous young woman just walked by…. Being male, I couldn’t help but look…. sadly, that is all I’m capable of doing these days, especially when my back is so painful, like today. It took me 15 minutes to walk down the hill, a matter of four blocks…. pathetic…..

But, last night, I found the following, which just goes to show that the idea of pearling is not as new to Art as I had thought…. though I can’t say that I find Fellini to be anyone I would consider an expert on Art. The assertion he makes here, that art is autobiographical, is HIS OWN feeling about it; for him, I’m sure it is a personal process into which he pours himself. But, a lot of artists are not as egotistical as he… of course, as a director of movies, he would HAVE to show more ego than his actors, and that is going a ways, for sure….

“All art is autobiographical. The pearl is the oyster’s autobiography.” — Federico Fellini

Enough about me…. shall we Pearl?
__________________________________

A Native American elder once described his own inner struggles in this manner: “Inside of me there are two dogs. One of the dogs is mean and evil. The other dog is good. The mean dog fights the good dog all the time.” When asked which dog wins, he reflected for a moment and replied, “The one I feed the most.” — George Bernard Shaw

This is a wonderful anecdote, and one I feel very firmly about, as it is one of the clearest lessons in self-awareness I have ever seen. This one is so simple an idea, that even the ignorant asses who make up the political cadre in this country would be able to understand it. They probably couldn’t do it, as they never, ever think about themselves other than as an important person, who doesn’t need to make changes in himself. Anyone who does think of themselves would never, ever consent to be put into a public office…. the two things (introspection vs. public office) just don’t mix…. That is because of the following, from a pretty smart fella, who live quite some time ago, but seemed to have a good head on his shoulders….

“Neither do the ignorant seek after wisdom. For herein is the evil of ignorance, that he who is neither good nor wise is nevertheless satisfied with himself; he has no desire for that of which he feels no want.” — Plato (428-348? B.C.)

“…he who is neither good nor wise” is a perfect description of anyone who wants to be President of this country. I’ve said it before, and I’m saying it again, because it bears repetition, that anyone, anyone at all, who actually WANTS to be President can be classified as clinically insane, usually a paranoid schizophrenic, with grandiose delusions of adequacy…. NOBODY is adequate for that job… nobody. And anyone who thinks they are is simply not all there…..

And it’s just a box of rain
I don’t know who put it there
Believe it if you need it
Or leave it if you dare
And it’s just a box of rain
Or a ribbon for your hair
Such a long, long time to be gone
And a short time to be there

— Box of Rain by Phil Lesh & Robert Hunter

Ah me…. politics and politicians are such an easy target. If it wasn’t so much fun, I might call it a naughty habit, and leave them to their devices, which surely are many….. Since we’re pressed for time today, we’ll leave them be, and just caution y’all to watch out, because their antics can be dangerous, if they are left without supervision for long….
__________________________________

Bankers Are Just Like Anybody Else, Except Richer

This is a song to celebrate banks,
Because they are full of money and you go into them and all
you hear is clinks and clanks,
Or maybe a sound like the wind in the trees on the hills,
Which is the rustling of the thousand dollar bills.
Most bankers dwell in marble halls,
Which they get to dwell in because they encourage deposits
and discourage withdrawals,
And particularly because they all observe one rule which woe
betides the banker who fails to heed it,
Which is you must never lend any money to anybody unless
they don’t need it.
I know you, you cautious conservative banks!
If people are worried about their rent it is your duty to deny
them the loan of one nickel, yes, even one copper engraving
of the martyred son of the late Nancy Hanks;
Yes, if they request fifty dollars to pay for a baby you must
look at them like Tarzan looking at an uppity ape in the
jungle,
And tell them what do they think a bank is, anyhow, they had
better go get the money from their wife’s aunt or uncle.
But suppose people come in and they have a million and they
want another million to pile on top of it,
Why, you brim with the milk of human kindness and you
urge them to accept every drop of it,
And you lend them the million so then they have two million
and this gives them the idea that they would be better off
with four,
So they already have two million as security so you have no
hesitation in lending them two more,
And all the vice-presidents nod their heads in rhythm,
And the only question asked is do the borrowers want the
money sent or do they want to take it withm.
Because I think they deserve our appreciation and thanks,
the jackasses who go around saying that health and happiness
are everything and money isn’t essential,
Because as soon as they have to borrow some unimportant
money to maintain their health and happiness they starve
to death so they can’t go around any more sneering at good
old money, which is nothing short of providential.

Ogden Nash

Serendipity strikes again, even twice… I’ve used this poem previously, but decided to go with it today, just because it fits the theme for today, by poking at the 1%, who can use all the pokes they can get….. Enjoy!
__________________________________

Thou shalt not kill? What about Exodus 22:18-20? — Smart Bee

Sorcerers, sexual perverts with animals, and anyone who doesn’t follow the Bible’s laws, are apparently not subject to the same laws as the rest of the Church’s followers. According to the Bible, it is not only okay to kill them, but it is the law. Of course, no one could ever accuse Christianity of consistency of thought or action, could they?….. I”m not going to get into this heavily today, but couldn’t resist one shot at the Church, to go along with the short rant on politicians, and the poem taking shots at the bankers….. We have to think about this kind of stuff, because they never will…..
__________________________________

Not bad for 45 minutes work, I’d say. I’d like to take a moment to thank my regular readers, and any new followers I haven’t acknowledged. I’ve not had time to get to all the comments, as the restaurant kicks me out after a couple hours (or my guilt at taking up their space for my access to the internet sends me packing….), and I’ve barely been able to keep up with posting these Pearls, and answering email.

Thank you, thank you, for stopping in to read my musings, and I hope they bring you a smile, or at least a random thought you can use in your own head….. I’ll be back online at home, hopefully in the coming week, but eventually for sure; I merely have to humble myself to deal with Comcast, the truly evil leader of the cable guy system. As soon as I can make kissy face with them, they’ll hook me up…. until then, I’m stuck eating croissants and bagels with my coffee…. I’ll be glad to stay home, as I’m starting to balloon up with all the extra carbs….

Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you…..

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Kowabunga!

Ferrets don’t elect their kings…..

Posted on August 24, 2012 by gigoid

Ffolkes,
“I’m dappled and dreary, and ready for sleep” It’s odd that Paul Simon should know how I feel this morning… it’s even odder that I should feel like this after 8 or so hours of sleep. Aren’t we supposed to wake up with bursting energy, having filled our depleted stores through the miracle of sleep? I believe we are, so going through a whole night, and still needing rest, is somewhat discouraging, to say the least.

I’m so tired, I’m breaking the first rule of typing, taught to me so many years ago by Mr. Morgan, who always wore a pastel colored jumpsuit, a different shade for each day of the week…. You may take that information as you wish; I had to…. My typing class was on Wednesday during summer break, so we always got the same color to look at, this nauseating shade of lime sherbet (or less discreetly, vomit green)….

Any who, Mr. Morgan was big on posture and proper technique, so sitting straight and keeping one’s wrist arched over the keyboard were considered basic. I’m so tired this morning, and my back is so stiff and sore, I’m listing heavily to the right, and my wrists are resting on the edge of the laptop, moving the fingers without even lifting off where I’m leaning. Sitting straight is what I’d call an impossible dream for me, and leaning on one supportive arm or the other is now a basic rule-of-life to avoid major pain. So, Mr. Morgan can take his posture and technique, and firmly put them where the sun don’t shine….

I suppose I’m going to have to suck it up, and either go back to bed, returning later to finish this, or just get on with it. For now, we’ll push on, and hope we find a pocket of energy down the line a bit. Sometimes they hide….. and then pop up when not expected. Usually, it is at a good time, so I’ll trust to fate today (something I rarely do, deliberately…. as you may know from previous posts, I’m not big on believing that fate is written in stone, so I don’t give in to it very often….) If this works, all well and good; if not, well,….. fuck it…. Shall we Pearl?…..

“Beware when the great God lets loose a thinker on this planet.” — Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803-1882), “Circles”
___________________________________

Yesterday, I sat down in the afternoon to do some pearl diving, as my stash was getting low. Out of the first ten pearls offered up for my perusal, the following entries, all but one from Smart Bee itself, popped up one after another, just as if they were meant to be together. Upon rearranging the order slightly, I found them to be correct; together they make a fine little old-school pearl. So, without further ado, follow the bouncing thought bubble to the ending point, where you will find yourself in possession of a valuable piece of virtual wisdom…. or possibly, a great deal of confusion…. your choice, both are free of charge….

Although everyone is entitled to be stupid, some abuse this privilege. — Smart Bee

Keep the pointy end forward and the dirty side down. — Smart Bee

I’ll tell you what’s wrong with it, my lad. It’s dead! — Smart Bee

Tomorrow & tomorrow & tomorrow creeps in this rutabaga… — Smart Bee

Ignorance of one’s ignorance is the greatest ignorance.– Smart Bee

“YOW!! I’m in a very clever and adorable INSANE ASYLUM!!” — Zippy the Pinhead

I think the final line from Zippy punctuates the idea very well, ending not only with wisdom, but with two exclamation points to drive it home!!…. Such courteous service, you won’t find just anywhere…. Most bloggers would just abandon you, leaving you to figure stuff out on your own. But, not here at gigoid’s house.. we’re all about customer service….. I hope you enjoyed the ride; you may now go on to the next section…..
___________________________________

Ogden Nash is one of my favorite poets, mainly for his sense of irreverence. Below you will find three poems that demonstrate his mastery in different ways. The second poem, Fleas, is considered to be the shortest poem ever written, and I believe it holds the Guinness Book of Records title for that category….. Enjoy!…..

A Caution To Everybody

Consider the auk;
Becoming extinct because he forgot how to fly, and could only walk.
Consider man, who may well become extinct
Because he forgot how to walk and learned how to fly before he thinked.
~~~~~~~~~
Fleas

Adam
Had’em
~~~~~~~~~
Listen…

There is a knocking in the skull,
An endless silent shout
Of something beating on a wall,
And crying, “Let me out!”

That solitary prisoner
Will never hear reply.
No comrade in eternity
Can hear the frantic cry.

No heart can share the terror
That haunts his monstrous dark.
The light that filters through the chinks
No other eye can mark.

When flesh is linked with eager flesh,
And words run warm and full,
I think that he is loneliest then,
The captive in the skull.

Caught in a mesh of living veins,
In cell of padded bone,
He loneliest is when he pretends
That he is not alone.

We’d free the incarcerate race of man
That such a doom endures
Could only you unlock my skull,
Or I creep into yours.

All three poems by Ogden Nash
___________________________________

My search for pearls today keeps coming up with stuff more appropriate to the old style; nothing to rant about so far. But the following group of pearls does have a conclusion in mind, and for bonus points, you can tell me your thoughts on that in the comments section below…. good hunting!…. and don’t hurt yourself looking for the point; it won’t be on the quiz……

“I contend that we are both atheists. I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours.” — Stephen Roberts

There is no ornament like virtue,
There is no misery like worry,
There is no protection like patience,
There is no friend equal to generosity.
— Nagarjuna (c. 100-200 A.D.)

When an Agnostic dies, does he go to the Great Perhaps? — Smart Bee, in sardonic mode, tongue firmly planted in cheek….

The wise man’s eyes are in his head; but the fool walketh in darkness: and I myself perceived also that one event happeneth to them all.
Then said I in my heart, As it happeneth to the fool so it happeneth even to me; and why was I then more wise? Then I said in my heart, that this is also vanity.
For there is no remembrance of the wise more than of the fool for ever; seeing that which now is in the days to come shall all be forgotten. And how dieth the wise man? As the fool.
— Ecclesiastes 2:14-16

“Is this bullshit or fertilizer?” — Smart Bee

There you go….. hope you have as much fun with it as I did….. and, sorry, if my over-enthusiastic handling of the various parts has caused them to appear somewhat bedraggled…. they’ll fluff out in the sunshine….
___________________________________

Six of one, half-dozen of the other….. that’s how it shakes down around here in the mornings…. This Pearl, though light on original material, feels like a good one, so I’m not going to even think about it….. Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you…..

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Kowabunga!

Emerald green tofu makes better ballast…..

Posted on August 18, 2012 by gigoid

Ffolkes,
All attempts to establish routine are now considered futile; only random acts that resist routine will be allowed. And damn! I wish I could find a comfortable chair in which to sit…. Yes, I know that sounds stilted and pompous, but grammar is grammar, so whattya gonna do?

Any who, back to routine, or lack thereof….. Waking in the middle of the night, sobbing over a dream, is not what I’d call conducive to making a routine. It took me an hour, and two or four solid shots to get back to a state where I could fall asleep again, and consequently gave me a late start this morning…..SIGH…. (That’s a west-county Irish sigh, a long full breath, and slow exhale, accompanied by a sorrowful expression and a sad shake of the head….)

I should probably be getting used to this randomness in my life; not having to work, or to spend any significant time worrying about what other folks need or want, is both the greatest perk, and the most stinging curse of retirement. The outer world no longer has a say in when I do something, or even what I do. I make my own schedule, and thus have no one to blame if it doesn’t suit me…. which, I’m sure you can see, is a reflection of that blessing/curse relationship. Ah well, such is life….

Since I’m late, and will be later, given the upcoming events this morning, we should get to the searching portion of the process, as it is the most time-consuming part. So…. shall we Pearl? Anything has got to be better than what has been happening thus far…..

“A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single step.” — Lao-Tzu, Tao Teh Ching
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The Lord gave, and the Lord hath taken away; blessed be the name of the Lord. — Old Testament — Job i, 21

I don’t know if it actually was Job who first said this particular phrase, but, given what God eventually did to him, all on a bet with Satan, it could have been…. If so, it goes to show, one shouldn’t go too long in the desert sun without finding some shade….

Here we have a statement that purports to provide reason for worship, a justification of why we should bow our heads in prayer to the heavens…. in short it says, “God is unpredictable, and omnipotent; it makes good sense to kowtow to Him…. he likes appeasement.” Well, maybe not, but you get the idea. We are theoretically in the power of a mad God, one who will fuck with his creation at the drop of a hat, just to entertain himself and the Devil over a wager.

He put Job through some outrageous times…. boils, plagues, genocide, hordes of locusts, deformity, God really did a number on Job, trying to see if his mind-conditioning would hold…. Since, according to the story, Job did hold out, and suffered all he did at God’s hand, and still wouldn’t curse him, we see that it did hold fast. What a dolt he must have been! No, I meant Job, but you may be right…. God surely acted like a dickhead in this one….

Sorry, but along about the third time God took everything away from me (had I been his chosen target instead of that stubborn boob, Job…), I would have started trying to figure out some way to fire back a few warning rounds, just to let Him know I’d had enough of that kind of treatment. A certain amount of leeway should be given, of course, but nobody gets more than three, I don’t care who they think they are…. By the act of persecution of Job, in my mind, He gave up any rights to worship, or even belief…. and He ought to know that, as he made me the way I am (according to the theory as given in Genesis).

I’d make this piece longer, but I think I’ve probably offended the Christians out there enough for one day…. also, the next section is a great poem, by my favorite poet, and I’d as soon you read it all, long as it is…. onward…..
___________________________________

This poem is rather long…. but I hope you read it all; it’s a great follow to the previous pearl, and well worth the time it takes….. enjoy!

A Tale Of The Thirteenth Floor

The hands of the clock were reaching high
In an old midtown hotel;
I name no name, but its sordid fame
Is table talk in hell.
I name no name, but hell’s own flame
Illumes the lobby garish,
A gilded snare just off Times Square
For the maidens of the parish.

The revolving door swept the grimy floor
Like a crinoline grotesque,
And a lowly bum from an ancient slum
Crept furtively past the desk.
His footsteps sift into the lift
As a knife in the sheath is slipped,
Stealthy and swift into the lift
As a vampire into a crypt.

Old Maxie, the elevator boy,
Was reading an ode by Shelley,
But he dropped the ode as it were a toad
When the gun jammed into his belly.
There came a whisper as soft as mud
In the bed of an old canal:
“Take me up to the suite of Pinball Pete,
The rat who betrayed my gal.”

The lift doth rise with groans and sighs
Like a duchess for the waltz,
Then in middle shaft, like a duchess daft,
It changes its mind and halts.
The bum bites lip as the landlocked ship
Doth neither fall nor rise,
But Maxie the elevator boy
Regards him with burning eyes.
“First, to explore the thirteenth floor,”
Says Maxie, “would be wise.”

Quoth the bum, “There is moss on your double cross,
I have been this way before,
I have cased the joint at every point,
And there is no thirteenth floor.
The architect he skipped direct
From twelve unto fourteen,
There is twelve below and fourteen above,
And nothing in between,
For the vermin who dwell in this hotel
Could never abide thirteen.”

Said Max, “Thirteen, that floor obscene,
Is hidden from human sight;
But once a year it doth appear,
On this Walpurgis Night.
Ere you peril your soul in murderer’s role,
Heed those who sinned of yore;
The path they trod led away from God,
And onto the thirteenth floor,
Where those they slew, a grisly crew,
Reproach them forevermore.

“We are higher than twelve and below fourteen,”
Said Maxie to the bum,
“And the sickening draft that taints the shaft
Is a whiff of kingdom come.
The sickening draft that taints the shaft
Blows through the devil’s door!”
And he squashed the latch like a fungus patch,
And revealed the thirteenth floor.

It was cheap cigars like lurid scars
That glowed in the rancid gloom,
The murk was a-boil with fusel oil
And the reek of stale perfume.
And round and round there dragged and wound
A loathsome conga chain,
The square and the hep in slow lock step,
The slayer and the slain.
(For the souls of the victims ascend on high,
But their bodies below remain.)

The clean souls fly to their home in the sky,
But their bodies remain below
To pursue the Cain who each has slain
And harry him to and fro.
When life is extinct each corpse is linked
To its gibbering murderer,
As a chicken is bound with wire around
The neck of a killer cur.

Handcuffed to Hate come Doctor Waite
(He tastes the poison now),
And Ruth and Judd and a head of blood
With horns upon its brow.
Up sashays Nan with her feathery fan
From Floradora bright;
She never hung for Caesar Young
But she’s dancing with him tonight.

Here’s the bulging hip and the foam-flecked lip
Of the mad dog, Vincent Coll,
And over there that ill-met pair,
Becker and Rosenthal,
Here’s Legs and Dutch and a dozen such
Of braggart bullies and brutes,
And each one bends ‘neath the weight of friends
Who are wearing concrete suits.

Now the damned make way for the double-damned
Who emerge with shuffling pace
From the nightmare zone of persons unknown,
With neither name nor face.
And poor Dot King to one doth cling,
Joined in a ghastly jig,
While Elwell doth jape at a goblin shape
And tickle it with his wig.

See Rothstein pass like breath on a glass,
The original Black Sox kid;
He riffles the pack, riding piggyback
On the killer whose name he hid.
And smeared like brine on a slavering swine,
Starr Faithful, once so fair,
Drawn from the sea to her debauchee,
With the salt sand in her hair.

And still they come, and from the bum
The icy sweat doth spray;
His white lips scream as in a dream,
“For God’s sake, let’s away!
If ever I meet with Pinball Pete
I will not seek his gore,
Lest a treadmill grim I must trudge with him
On the hideous thirteenth floor.”

“For you I rejoice,” said Maxie’s voice,
“And I bid you go in peace,
But I am late for a dancing date
That nevermore will cease.
So remember, friend, as your way you wend,
That it would have happened to you,
But I turned the heat on Pinball Pete;
You see – I had a daughter, too!”

The bum reached out and he tried to shout,
But the door in his face was slammed,
And silent as stone he rode down alone
From the floor of the double-damned.

Ogden Nash
___________________________________

The following is an old-school pearl, with a specific thought in mind for you to deduce….. for the sake of everyone’s blood pressure, that specific thought will be revealed at the end…. I don’t usually, but thought I’d give a treat, just ’cause I’m a nice guy…. really, I am……

Child: “Supreme Being, why is there evil in the world?”
Supreme Being (Sir John Gielgud in a Savile Row suit): “Oh, dear, I can’t remember, exactly. . . something to do with free will, I believe.”
— Terry Gilliam, _The Time Bandits_

“The character of human life, like the character of the human condition, like the character of all life, is “ambiguity”: the inseparable mixture of good and evil, the true and false, the creative and destructive forces — both individual and social.” — Paul Tillich

Halfway down the stairs
Is a stair
Where I sit.
There isn’t any
Other stair
Quite like
It.
I’m not at the bottom,
I’m not at the top;
So this is the stair
Where
I always
Stop.
— A.A. Milne

“Belief gets in the way of learning.” — Robert Heinlein, Time Enough for Love

“Truth, in the matters of religion, is simply the opinion that has survived.” — Oscar Wilde

“SANTA CLAUS comes down a FIRE ESCAPE wearing bright blue LEG WARMERS. He scrubs the POPE with a mild soap or detergent for 15 minutes, starring JANE FONDA!!” — Zippy the Pinhead

You may be asking yourself at this point, just what have I gotten myself into? Well, relax, it’s no big deal….. all of the foregoing is intended to lead you to the following….. which WILL be on the quiz…..

An it harms none, do what thou will. — Wiccan Credo

Alternate answer, also correct:

There’s little in taking or giving,
There’s little in water or wine:
This living, this living, this living,
Was never a project of mine.
Oh, hard is the struggle, and sparse is
The gain of the one at the top,
For art is a form of catharsis,
And love is a permanent flop,
And work is the province of cattle,
And rest’s for a clam in a shell,
So I’m thinking of throwing the battle —
Would you kindly direct me to hell?

— Dorothy Parker

“Birth, school, work, death. About sums it up, I think.” — Smart Bee
___________________________________

For a rush job, this didn’t come out too badly…. it will have to do, anyway, so let’s get on with it….. Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you……

Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Kowabunga!

The Grand Vizier wishes to be disturbed….

Posted on August 16, 2012 by gigoid

Ffolkes,
Yesterday afternoon, I sat down with the urge to write. A number of fleeting images chased each other around in my head, vying for who would be first to fly…. after some negotiations, I wrote what appeared to be a paragraph of prose in an abstract style, re-read it, scratched my head, and left it alone for the night…..

This morning, when I sat down to start today’s Pearl, the paragraph was still there…. but it had changed somehow in the night…. I don’t know if it is my mind that changed, or the paragraph, but all of a sudden, it wasn’t a paragraph….. a few strokes, a couple of format and structural changes, and voilá, it’s a poem! Completely finished, too, needing nothing more from me…. I’ll call it….

Serendipity Morning

My mind wants to fly,
my soul wants to hold close, the source,
strong, the moments of time;
each as precious as golden thread,
binding together such elements of longing desire.

Love hovers, always patient,
seeking the open heart,
reaching for the promise of tomorrow…..
only for one, only for now, only what is real….
Dreaming, the morning calls,
heavy with mordant belief,
replete, and eternally alive…..

gigoid

I just love it when a plan comes together…. especially when there is no plan….. 🙂 Shall we Pearl?…..
___________________________________

“I want to dress you up as TALLULAH BANKHEAD and cover you with VASELINE and WHEAT THINS..” — Zippy the Pinhead

After starting with a poem I wrote myself (a rare occurrence, indeed….), the universal law of dichotomy comes into play, as things will become unbalanced without some alternative, oppositional action, and what better candidate for that than Zippy? Just look at this quote….. absolute nonsense, in terms of the real world, yet you, and I, will both check our supplies of both Vaseline AND Wheat Thins, just to be sure…… You don’t want to let Zippy loose in your cupboards to look for himself, believe me! I did one time, and never did find my coffee maker, or my toaster…..

Zippy has brought many an hour of relaxation, and a grin to my face for as many years as I can remember, which is, sad to say, a lot of years now. After a hard day of dealing with the vicissitudes of life (love that word!…. vicissitudes… it just rolls off the tongue, doesn’t it?…..), I know I can come home, pull off my shoes and socks, and know that a few minutes of Zippy will soothe and soften my fevered brow, even better than beer….. though not better than bourbon…. but, then, what is? Nothing, that’s what….

Of course, I can’t afford to drink bourbon too often any more, and not just because of finances…. I find myself of late not merely not enjoying the buzz that comes with a couple fingers of the beast, but actively disliking the physical symptoms that go along with any such imbibing…. not to mention the morning after, which nowadays hits me like a runaway train. If I consume more than two cocktails, the headache and body malaise the next morning is like a short visit to Hell, without the extreme heat, but with the pain and anguish, and a heavy feeling of regret…. So, these days, rather than live with either regrets, or hangovers, I’ve pretty much curtailed most of my alcohol consumption, an act for which my liver is probably dancing for joy….

Now that we have meandered down some rather unbeaten paths in my head for a time, I think maybe we should go on to something a bit more constructive… or at least funnier…. I don’t know what it is, but a dose of Zippy brings out my pedagogy, along with a tendency toward pomposity, that shows up in what I write, no matter how silly I get…. but four paragraphs, all about nothing, really, is quite enough for one day…. So, let me leave you with one more Zippyism, and we’ll go on to bigger, better things, or at the very least, something else….

“I’m having BEAUTIFUL THOUGHTS about the INSIPID WIVES of smug and wealthy CORPORATE LAWYERS.” — Zippy the Pinhead
___________________________________

Come On In, The Senility Is Fine

People live forever in Jacksonville and St. Petersburg and Tampa,
But you don’t have to live forever to become a grampa.
The entrance requirements for grampahood are comparatively mild,
You only have to live until your child has a child.
From that point on you start looking both ways over your shoulder,
Because sometimes you feel thirty years younger and sometimes
thirty years older.
Now you begin to realize who it was that reached the height of
imbecility,
It was whoever said that grandparents have all the fun and none of
the responsibility.
This is the most enticing spiderwebs of a tarradiddle ever spun,
Because everybody would love to have a baby around who was no
responsibility and lots of fun,
But I can think of no one but a mooncalf or a gaby
Who would trust their own child to raise a baby.
So you have to personally superintend your grandchild from diapers
to pants and from bottle to spoon,
Because you know that your own child hasn’t sense enough to come
in out of a typhoon.
You don’t have to live forever to become a grampa, but if you do
want to live forever,
Don’t try to be clever;
If you wish to reach the end of the trail with an uncut throat,
Don’t go around saying Quote I don’t mind being a grampa but I
hate being married to a gramma Unquote.

Ogden Nash

A little paean to my new age-group…. age appropriate, I’d say, but not yet dead….. Enjoy!……
___________________________________

“Nothing in the world is more flexible and yielding than water. Yet when it attacks the firm and the strong, none can withstand it, because they have no way to change it. So the flexible overcome the adamant, the yielding overcome the forceful. Everyone knows this, but no one can do it.” — Lao-Tzu

Water…. the power of water is unmatched over time; just ask the Grand Canyon. Water ties us to the universe; our physical make-up depends on it for survival, as well as mere existence. It is so soft, and yielding, yet cannot be destroyed at all; one can only cause it to change form, from ice, to water, to steam, all of which hold the same properties as the middle state, though slightly differently interpreted. Most important, to the scholar’s mind, is its nature…. emulating its spirit, becoming like water, is the goal of almost all meditation practice, as well as a goal of the martial artist….

“My writing is like a ten gallon spring. It can issue from the ground anywhere at all. On smooth ground it rushes swiftly on and covers a thousand li in a single day without difficulty. When it twists and turns among mountains and rocks, it fits its form to things it meets: unknowable. What can be known is, it always goes where it must go, always stops where it cannot help stopping — nothing else. More than that, even I cannot know.” — Su Shih

One of the most powerful of concepts in martial arts is the emulation of water. The student is taught to learn how to move like water, to move with the rhythm of the universe as energy flows from one point to another. One of the most valuable techniques I’ve seen to teach this lesson is one where the student stands in a balanced stance, one foot forward; the arms are held in front of the body, as if holding a large ball. The student then moves his weight from the back foot to the front foot, then back again, while moving the ball in a slow circle, pushed away when moving forward, and brought back when the weight shifts to the rear….

The trick to learn is to be like the tide, accepting the water as it flows in to its highest point, then moving with it as it irresistibly flows back into the sea, as the weight moves to the front foot. A smooth shifting of the weight, and finding the correct rhythm teaches both balance, and strength, and the power of moving like water…. Learning to use gravity as an ally, instead of a limitation, gives one an unimaginable advantage over one who does not know how to do so….

In addition to the physical lessons that water has to teach us, it also provides the intellect with a subject of study, to find the nature of water in its most real state. Learning the nature of water brings us closer to an understanding of all nature, and how we may fit into it with the most benevolent, and beneficial attitudes.

The path of least resistance, followed by water as it flows downhill, teaches us to learn to find the same path for ourselves. The immutability of water teaches us how to resist changes to our nature, while remaining in touch with those parts of the universe that are within all of us…. And the flexibility of water teaches us to remain flexible ourselves, to learn to recognize when it is time to be ice, when it is time to be steam, and when it is time to flow like water in its normal state…..

Joshu asked the teacher Nansen, “What is the True Way?”

Nansen answered, “Every way is the true Way.”

Joshu asked, “Can I study it?”

Nansen answered, “The more you study, the further from the Way.”

Joshu asked, “If I don’t study it, how can I know it?”

Nansen answered, “The Way does not belong to things seen: nor to things unseen. It does not belong to things known: nor to things unknown. Do not seek it, study it, or name it. To find yourself on it, open yourself as wide as the sky.”
___________________________________

It’s another fine mess I’ve created here this morning, I think….. It really doesn’t matter, because I’m posting it no matter how it looks from this end; I may even go back to bed afterwards…… Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you……

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Kowabunga!

A predictable failure to perpetuate…..

Posted on August 15, 2012 by gigoid

Ffolkes,
The hardest part is over, so I can now relax….. I suppose I could apply that statement to my life at large, as well as to my current situation, wherein I have to find a new dwelling… the hardest part is over….. Wow, what a nice feeling that carries with it! I hadn’t really stopped and looked at things exactly like this; it’s a nice little change. Now I can relax….

In so many ways, I am a lucky man…. I was lucky enough to be born in this country, where, regardless of how rigged the game is, there is still ample opportunity for people to make their way, and to succeed in building themselves a comfortable existence…. If it isn’t always easy, well, that is to be expected….

Now, after working for a large portion of my life, I have the opportunity to kick back and enjoy the fruits of my labors, in a manner of speaking. The effort I put in at my jobs, from age 14 to age 60, will, when fully in place, will allow me to support myself without strain… I won’t be affluent, by any stretch of the imagination…. but I’ll have enough to live on, with enough left over to do some of the traveling I’ve always wanted to do…. and you can’t beat that with a stick….

The last two years of living with much less than is called for has taught me, or re-taught me, some valuable lessons on how to live cheaply. One learns fairly quickly which expenses are necessary, and which are not, and, at the same time, one learns to get by without those things we thought we needed, but found we didn’t…. and these lessons will come in handy after my full retirement kicks in, allowing me to live comfortably, while still allowing me to save up to travel. So put away the stick, we won’t be needing it….

It’s good now and again to look on one’s life and reflect upon its events; it keeps life fresh, and like today, one may find that things are much better than they look at first…. It makes that old saw about stopping to smell the roses more attractive, as in those times when you find a huge red one, just bursting with beauty and the smell of springtime….. On that note, shall we Pearl?……
___________________________________

“It is not the possessions but the desires of mankind which require to be equalized.” — Aristotle

Life is tough, but not as tough as it used to be. It’s been a long time since we humans had to actually go out and be responsible for our own survival, a pastime that, up until about 2500-3000 years ago, was pretty much a full time occupation for the majority of people. Very few folks back then could be spared to sit around doing nothing, using up resources that were acquired by the others of the group; everybody had to pull their own weight, or they starved…..

But once the species figured out farming, and how to produce food more efficiently than having to go out to find it, life got a lot easier, at least from a physical standpoint. Farming kept folks from needing to move around so much to look for food, so cities began to form, and civilization began to organize into its various strata….. beloved ruling class, priestly hierarchy class, warrior class, and, of course, the patsy class, also known as the worker bees, or peons, depending on one’s particular degree of sliminess….

To look at what Aristotle says above, one might think it speaks to the upper classes, suggesting that, perhaps, if they wanted less than they have, which is more than they need, then there might not be as many folks who want only enough to survive, but can’t find even that. It isn’t as if they don’t have enough…..However, thanks to the priestly hierarchies, who act as the protector of the ruling class, the less fortunate are lied to, and are told that THEY are being tested, and not to want more…. The priests have them all convinced that all they should want is just enough, in reward for which they will be compensated IN THE NEXT LIFE! It’s one of the most egregious scams that has ever been perpetrated on the masses, and continues today….

“Most of the dogmatic religions have exhibited a perverse talent for taking the wrong side on the most important concepts in the material universe, from the structure of the solar system to the origin of man.” — George Gaylord Simpson

The problem now is that it has gotten to the point that almost all the available resources of the planet are used up… only by reducing the total number of people drastically can the species continue to survive…. and we all know who is going to get the short end of THAT stick, don’t we?

Once people realize that the available resources needed for the species to survive are being hoarded and manipulated by the powers that be, all to favor themselves, the unwashed masses are going to be, shall we say, less than happy with the beloved ruling class, and even less happy with the priestly hierarchies who prop them up. It will be Mother Nature’s way of saying “you wouldn’t play nicely with others, and now you’ll have to pay the price for that failure….” Of course, she would, and will, probably make it sound less pompous than I do….

Being able to control one’s desires is a very valuable skill, and one worth learning, for certain. But when the desire is the simple desire to survive, it is not one that either can, or should, be eliminated…. For many centuries, the beloved ruling class and the priestly hierarchies who are in league with them have been lying to the general populace for their own benefit; history, even when written by the winners, makes that very clear.

“History is the version of past events that people have decided to agree upon.” — Napoleon Bonaparte (1769-1821)

Soon, they will have to come to terms with that treachery, as the planet’s resources, and its ability to support our form of life, are reduced to where we can no longer grow enough food, or breathe the air due to the addition of far too much carbon monoxide…. When the general public realizes that the PTB are the assholes who have put us in this position, I don’t think they are going to be very happy about it…. and my only hope is that they don’t take so long to come to that conclusion that it is too late to make the needed changes…. which is a distinct possibility…. Small hopes are better than none…..

Jesus is coming, everyone look busy. — Bumper Sticker
___________________________________

À Bas Ben Adhem

My fellow man I do not care for.
I often ask me, What’s he there for?
The only answer I can find
Is, Reproduction of his kind.
If I’m supposed to swallow that,
Winnetka is my habitat.
Isn’t it time to carve Hic Jacet
Above that Reproduction racket?

To make the matter more succinct:
Suppose my fellow man extinct.
Why, who would not approve the plan
Save possibly my fellow man?
Yet with a politician’s voice
He names himself as Nature’s choice.

The finest of the human race
Are bad in figure, worse in face.
Yet just because they have two legs
And come from storks instead of eggs
They count the spacious firmament
As something to be charged and sent.

Though man created cross-town traffic,
The Daily Mirror, News and Graphic,
The pastoral fight and fighting pastor,
And Queen Marie and Lady Astor,
He hails himself with drum and fife
And bullies lower forms of life.

Not that I think much depends
On how we treat our feathered friends,
Or hold the wrinkled elephant
A nobler creature than my aunt.
It’s simply that I’m sure I can
Get on without my fellow man.

Ogden Nash

Serendipity, by definition, is always a surprise, and usually a good one… in this case it was a great surprise…. The poem I posted a couple of days ago by Mr. Nash reminded me that he is one of my all-time favorite poets, because of his masterful use of the language, if nothing else…. But this one seems to have been written while reading my mind, as it complements the previous section perfectly, giving a poetic statement very similar in intent, and content, to the prose above. See, Fate CAN be our friend!…. Enjoy!….
___________________________________

“Do not confuse “duty” with what other people expect of you; they are utterly different. Duty is a debt you owe to yourself to fulfill obligations you have assumed voluntarily. Paying that debt can entail anything from years of patient work to instant willingness to die. Difficult it may be, but the reward is self-respect.

But there is no reward at all for doing what other people expect of you, and to do so is not merely difficult, but impossible. It is easier to deal with a footpad than it is with the leech who wants “just a few minutes of your time, please — this won’t take long.” Time is your total capital, and the minutes of your life are painfully few. If you allow yourself to fall into the vice of agreeing to such requests, they quickly snowball to the point where these parasites will use up 100 percent of your time — and squawk for more!

So learn to say No – and to be rude about it when necessary. Otherwise you will not have time to carry out your duty, or to do your own work, and certainly no time for love and happiness. The termites will nibble away your life and leave none of it for you. (This rule does not mean that you must not do a favor for a friend, or even a stranger. But let the choice be yours. Don’t do it because it is “expected” of you.) “

~~ Lazarus Long, “Time Enough for Love” by Robert A. Heinlein

Once or twice a year, I like to pull this out of my old posts and run it again. It is as perfect a description of Duty as I have ever seen, and matches up exactly, point by point, with what I was taught as a young boy by my father…. It is well worth reading, and even more well worth adopting into one’s personal philosophy….
___________________________________

Finding the last Pearl took, seemingly, forever…. well over an hour. But, perseverance paid off, as always…. Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you……

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Kowabunga!

Plain as the zit on your face….

Posted on August 13, 2012 by gigoid

Ffolkes,
As the sun sets over the western horizon, we bid a fond farewell to another day in paradise….. or would, if a) the sun were setting, instead of rising, and b) we were in paradise….. I guess you can’t have everything. In this case we have nothing, so it would behoove us to try to get serious here….. and we would, if a) we wanted something, and b) gave half a damn…. neither of which is true, so it looks like we’re all out of luck, and ideas, too….

Actually, I’ve got lots of ideas this morning, but most of them are X-rated, and unsuitable for a family blog….. I could send some over to Kyle I guess; he likes to write that sort of stuff…. but he probably wants to use his own, so that’s a wash….. This batch of concepts will just have to go into the scrap pile, as do many, many such useless thoughts of mine….. uh oh, break time…

Okay, I’m back…. Don’t ask…. Once again, picking the material that will best serve to introduce today’s Pearl has become more than a mere search; it is now more of a desperate floundering, and I’m liable to start throwing out all sorts of stuff, just to see if it sticks…. We could write a poem, but we like you all too much. We could stop talking in the royal third person, and take actual responsibility for our words, but it’s so much fun to use the royal “we”, as “Thank you, we are in the pink!” ~~ Lord Peter Wimsey, from Busman’s Honeymoon by Dorothy L. Sayers….

Or, I could just get on with it, which now seems to be the right thing to do…. shall we Pearl?…..
___________________________________

“There is no act of treachery or meanness of which a political party is not capable, for in politics there is no honor.” — Benjamin Disraeli

Considering that Mr. Disraeli was a politician himself, this becomes particularly rare; normally politicians won’t reveal their secrets like that, at least not until after the election. But, he’s dead, anyway, so what can he lose? You have to admit, you won’t see Mitt the Twitt, or Lyin’ Ryan admitting to stooping to such tactics… they do it, but they’ll never admit it….. Honesty is not one of Mitt’s strong points, as we’ve already had proven, repeatedly, and often….

It promises to be, if nothing else, a very interesting run-up to the election, now that Romney has used the biggest caliber bullet he could find to shoot his foot this time…. Not one day had passed when he (Romney) was forced to not comment (!!!!) on something his new Veep had said, as his position on that subject was documented elsewhere as in direct opposition to what Ryan had said….

“He’s racist, he’s homophobic, he’s xenophobic, and he’s a sexist. He’s a perfect Republican candidate!” — Commentator Bill Press on Pat Buchanan

Since the advent of the World Wide Web, it has become more difficult for Romney and his ilk, (which includes the Democrats; just because they aren’t as bad doesn’t mean they aren’t lying, too….) to tell their lies without a lot of preparation (otherwise known as “spin”) and denial. Websites such as FactChecker.com post daily reports on the lies that each candidate or politician utters publicly, checking the words against the Truth, as found by research and cross-checking of public records. Exaggerations, misquotes, taking out of context, all the different forms of promoting untruths are now exposed for all to see, if they wish….

Of course, many people don’t WANT to know if they are being lied to; in fact, it often seems to me that the folks who are supporting these idiots (Romney and Ryan in this instance…. the term “idiot” can be applied to almost any politician who opens their mouth..) are deliberately ignoring the truth, for the simple reason that they don’t care… As long as the candidates are white, they want them to get elected, because having a black President is fulfilling their worst nightmares, and making their racism obvious…. Of course, they will claim that they don’t like Obama because of his record, but that generally won’t wash, as much of his record shows that he has actually done them some good, a fact they are completely reluctant to admit….

“How pleasant then to be insane.” — F. Scott Fitzgerald

The fact that there are so many racists left in this country is disheartening, but I suppose it’s better to have the issue out in the open, where it can more easily be dealt with in a manner that is dignified; it’s hard to maintain dignity when slinging shit in the dark, a place in which conversations with racists often end up. However, I am still amazed that there are seniors, gays, immigrants, and women who are still supporting the conservative ticket the Republicans have decided to offer the voting public.

These men have made it clear that, if elected, they will send this country back into the middle of the previous century, in terms of societal progress, by eliminating Social Security, Planned Parenthood, making gay and lesbian marriage illegal, and completely eliminating abortion and women’s health rights, as well as curtailing all immigrant’s rights. They have promised to eliminate all of these, but the people who are supporting them seem to be as deeply insane as are their chosen candidates, and are obviously in deep denial….

“You know how dumb the average guy is? Well, by definition, half of them are even dumber than THAT.” — J.R. “Bob” Dobbs (paraphrased from a quote by George Carlin….. everybody plagiarizes sometimes….)

This is obviously a subject that I could rant about for days…. but, there are still over two months until the election, and I should save some energy for the material that I know will be forthcoming on a daily basis…. I think we need some poetry, as a relief from all this curmudgeonry…..
___________________________________

Bankers Are Just Like Anybody Else, Except Richer

This is a song to celebrate banks,
Because they are full of money and you go into them and all
you hear is clinks and clanks,
Or maybe a sound like the wind in the trees on the hills,
Which is the rustling of the thousand dollar bills.
Most bankers dwell in marble halls,
Which they get to dwell in because they encourage deposits
and discourage withdrawals,
And particularly because they all observe one rule which woe
betides the banker who fails to heed it,
Which is you must never lend any money to anybody unless
they don’t need it.
I know you, you cautious conservative banks!
If people are worried about their rent it is your duty to deny
them the loan of one nickel, yes, even one copper engraving
of the martyred son of the late Nancy Hanks;
Yes, if they request fifty dollars to pay for a baby you must
look at them like Tarzan looking at an uppity ape in the
jungle,
And tell them what do they think a bank is, anyhow, they had
better go get the money from their wife’s aunt or ungle.
But suppose people come in and they have a million and they
want another million to pile on top of it,
Why, you brim with the milk of human kindness and you
urge them to accept every drop of it,
And you lend them the million so then they have two million
and this gives them the idea that they would be better off
with four,
So they already have two million as security so you have no
hesitation in lending them two more,
And all the vice-presidents nod their heads in rhythm,
And the only question asked is do the borrowers want the
money sent or do they want to take it withm.
Because I think they deserve our appreciation and thanks,
the jackasses who go around saying that health and happi-
ness are everything and money isn’t essential,
Because as soon as they have to borrow some unimportant
money to maintain their health and happiness they starve
to death so they can’t go around any more sneering at good
old money, which is nothing short of providential.

Ogden Nash

Providential indeed…. What better poem to follow a rant about politics, than an ode to Bankers from one of my all time favorite poets….. enjoy!
___________________________________

Don’t even bother trying to tell me that there is no magic in the world….
    Human diplomats could learn a lot from just watching dogs and cats interact, when given the opportunity…..
    They always seem to come to terms with each other….
    Dogs get along pretty good with people, too….
    In fact, they like people a lot….
    So do cats….
    Sort of…. but, cats like dogs best, as much as they like people, though perhaps not as much as other cats…. it can be close though…..
    Why is it so hard for people to get along with each other, when we have these creatures to provide examples of how to do so? Your guess is as good as mine…..

(All the pictures were found on Facebook….)
___________________________________

Well, that certainly turned into an epic Pearl! And, one with so much effort put into it, that it is going out, no matter how it may or may not live up to my standards, such as they are….. Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you…..

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.gigoid

Kowabunga!

Real fun begins in the burrow….

Posted on April 27, 2012 by gigoid

Ffolkes,
It may, or may not, come as a surprise to you, but the material that appears here every day is as fresh and new to me as it is to you. All of what I write in this blog is made up every morning when I sit down to begin. I have no outlines, no lists of subject matter, no pre-written essays, or articles, or rants. I do save a few pearls here and there, in case the dB program, Smart Bee, is being recalcitrant, but I haven’t had to use the stash in six months or more.

Everything else is my reaction to the pearls that I pick, written moments after pasting the pearl into the word processor I’m using. Most of the ones I pick to write about each day are also fresh, as well, usually picked out that very morning. Sometimes a pearl will be in place, waiting, having been found the day, or a couple of days, before, but 9 times out of 10, I will move the waiting pearl to another day down the road, and use one I just found. It just seems to work out best this way, so that is how it is done…. It’s not logical, or even particularly well-designed and arranged. But, it works for me, and that, after all, is what it is all about…..

So be it…. I’m not sure why I said all that, but what the hell…. let’s just get down to it right away…. shall we Pearl?….
___________________________________

Angels and ministers of grace, defend us!
Be thou a spirit of health or goblin damn’d,
Bring with thee airs from heaven or blasts from hell,
Be thy intents wicked or charitable,
Thou comest in such a questionable shape
That I will speak to thee: I ‘ll call thee Hamlet,
King, father, royal Dane: O, answer me!
Let me not burst in ignorance, but tell
Why thy canonized bones, hearsed in death,
Have burst their cerements; why the sepulchre,
Wherein we saw thee quietly inurn’d,
Hath oped his ponderous and marble jaws
To cast thee up again. What may this mean,
That thou, dead corse, again in complete steel
Revisit’st thus the glimpses of the moon,
Making night hideous,
So horridly to shake our disposition
With thoughts beyond the reaches of our souls?
— William Shakespeare (1564-1616), Hamlet — Act i, Sc. 4

Time for a short rant…. I know the above is probably considered to be one of the finest examples of literature ever written. This soliloquy from Hamlet has been dissected and discussed to death many times over, in classrooms, in theaters, at dinner parties, and is used often as quotations to illustrate some point or another…. and it is SUCH a piece of CRAP!

I cannot believe that anyone still falls for this! What the fuck is he talking about? What has he said here, beyond some personal complaints about somebody that he has been rude to his entire life? Even when one filters out the middle English and puts it into more modern terminology, it doesn’t make any sense. It is just a litany of complaints that one can hear from one’s teenage son or daughter any time of day or night…..

I watched the movie, Star Trek IV, The Voyage Home, yesterday… it’s good entertainment, and has a lot of what made the original ST shows so watchable, i.e., interactions among the crew, specifically Spock, McCoy, and Kirk. At one point, when Spock’s memory is under question, McCoy delivers the first two lines above, whereupon Spock immediately supplies the play, act, and scene number from memory…. But I found it interesting that McCoy is one of the first to use the quote as a question of someone’s mental acuity…. it certainly is one of the few, if any, times that I’ve seen it used thus…. At least, used in this context, it at least admits the possibility that the speaker is less than completely sane, which to me seems quite apparent.

If I heard anyone spouting off like this, I would certainly be calling 911 to have someone come to take them away before they got violent…. But, humanity likes its heroes, even when it doesn’t even know why they are such….. so we’ll have to be subjected to Will’s overblown crap as long as people continue to put his work on a pedestal… when where it should be kept is in a locked vault….

“Hamlet is the tragedy of tackling a family problem too soon after college.” — Tom Masson
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“Some foolish men declare that a Creator made the world. The doctrine that the world was created is ill-advised, and should be rejected. If God created the world, where was He before creation? How could God have made the world without any raw material? If you say He made this first, and then the world, you are faced with an endless regression … Know that the world is uncreated, as time itself is, without beginning and end.” — The Mahapurana, Jinasena

There are times when the human race baffles me…. Many moons ago (a clever writer’s trick to indicate a VERY long time…), when we were all sitting around a campfire, say out in front of a nice cave we’d appropriated from some poor idiot killed in lieu of a mortgage payment, somebody came up with the concept of a Creator.

Now, the first question that comes to my mind is, “Why?” (I know, I know, that is a question we are not supposed to ask…. again, I will repeat, “Why?”….) What was it that prompted those folks to want to create some god-like figure to explain all the stuff we didn’t know at the time?

Were they sitting around blaming each other for the rain and thunder? Was there something about the way that wolf pack was stalking the same prey as we were hunting that indicated some sort of conspiracy? What? I don’t seem to be able to find out what impulse it was that caused them to make up such a specious and unlikely explanation for the way the world exists…. The one that they came up with does not fit the facts of the matter; it only fits the wishes of those who believe it. Even the explanation that pantheists like Hindi came up with are wishful thinking; it makes as little sense to assume that there are a thousand gods as it does to assume just one……

A Lie is still a Lie, even if you believe it. — Smart Bee

“Over 5,000 years ago, Moses said to the children of Israel, “Pick up your shovels, mount your asses and load your camels, and I will lead you to the promised land.”
Not too long ago, Roosevelt said, “Lay down your shovels, sit on your asses, light a Camel, this is the promised land.”
Now Nixon is stealing your shovels, kicking your asses, raising the price of Camels, and mortgaging the promised land.” — Smart Bee

This is the result, you see, of having this sort of nonsense to contend with. The mere existence of this joke indicates the depths of contradiction that are inherent in any such creation theory. The presence in society of a large group of people who all believe that they may do whatever they please, and their acts will be either sanctioned by the deity, or forgiven by Him, thus releasing them from all responsibility for whatever it is they choose to do, is a large factor in how close we are to extinction as a species. The self-indulgence and lack of any personal responsibility allowed by these religions can be seen as a major contributor to both the evil that men perpetrate on each other, as well as the degradations that we have committed on our environment.

And the saddest part of all of this is the simple fact that nobody cares. Millions and millions, even billions, of people on this planet believe that their religion is the gospel truth, and all the lies they are told, and all the lies they tell, are sanctioned by Heaven, and no matter what they do on Earth, they will be rewarded in Heaven…. They believe this with all their being, and nothing will change their minds, because they will not entertain any other ideas, having been programmed to reject anything that doesn’t fit with what they’ve been told to believe.

“Belief gets in the way of learning.” — Robert Heinlein, Time Enough for Love

Moreover, they are convinced that they have made the choice to believe all this; they cannot even see how they have been given no choice in the matter, having been indoctrinated from an early age, before they had the intellectual or mindful defenses against any such nonsense. Churches learned long ago to attack the minds of children first, for they cannot help but believe what their parents tell them…. thus, the vicious cycle of ignorance is passed on from generation to generation, all without ever being examined for truth…. a concept foreign to the very nature of the institution…..

“I honestly believe that the doctrine of hell was born in the glittering eyes of snakes that run in frightful coils watching for their prey. I believe it was born with the yelping, howling, growling and snarling of wild beasts… I despise it, I defy it, and I hate it.” — Robert G. Ingersoll

“Advise is seldom welcome, and those who need it the most, like it the least.” — Lord Chesterfield

“The truth is incontrovertible. Malice may attack it. Ignorance may deride it. But in the end, there it is.” — Winston Churchill
___________________________________

A mighty creature is the germ,
Though smaller than the pachyderm.
His customary dwelling place
Is deep within the human race.
His childish pride he often pleases
By giving people strange diseases.
Do you, my poppet, feel infirm?
You probably contain a germ.
— Odgen Nash (1902-1971)

As is always the case with the work of Ogden Nash, there is very little that can be added without becoming superfluous. He trims away any unnecessary words and ideas, and drives straight into the truth, adorned perfectly by whimsy. I can’t think of another poet who has such a consistent talent to make me smile; he never fails to amuse and uplift, and one always comes away happier, if not always wiser. His simple rhymes and snippets of humorous verse, in my mind, makes him one of the “best of the best” in that field…..

“Careful, Mister. Old Zeek is liable to fire that sucker up!” — Smart Bee
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Roosevelt’s Second Bill of Rights….. http://www.fdrheritage.org/bill_of_rights.htm

One of the bloggers whose work I enjoy, and whose work, and opinion I’ve come to respect, writes poetry and prose at his blog site, One Time Pad, located here: http://onetimepad.wordpress.com/ A while back, he referred me to an article discussing how our use of language affects how we look at the political forces at play in society. It was a very good article, thoughtful, insightful, and with some good, sound conclusions. But, I am not at this time going to discuss that article, as it could conceivably turn into a very long discussion. But, as part of the research the author performed, he looked at the above information, located at a site dedicated to the policies that are the legacy of Franklin D. Roosevelt, arguably the most popular President our country has ever seen.

Having not studied Roosevelt’s political philosophy outside what is part of every school’s history program, I cannot say whether I would agree with all of it. However, I did take the time to look over what is in the above, which is a proposal for new Amendments to the US Constitution, a Second Bill of Rights, which Roosevelt saw as a needed change, if society was to avoid in the future the same disastrously ill effects that he had just worked to counteract during the Great Depression in the 1930’s.

He saw a need to create more balance in society in how wealth and resources were allocated and shared on a society-wide basis. The amendments he proposed are all intended to foster and maintain that balance, and they all have to do with what he, and other liberals of the time, considered to be an expansion of basic human rights as outlined in the original Bill of Rights. In looking over what is here, I have to agree with the assessment he made; these are all changes that society will need to make, if we are to survive…. because they all assume that the real power in society CAN be returned to the people, instead of being concentrated and jealously protected by a select few who, by all indications, do not have the best interests of society at heart.

I firmly believe that the Occupy Movement, which is about to re-start its activist efforts to make the same litany of changes, would do well to adopt these proposed Amendments as the basis for their platform of purpose, and to work toward making them a part of American constitutional law. It would give them a legitimate focus, and will, if utilized well, stand a very good chance of succeeding in making a big difference…. and it sure couldn’t hurt to try….
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“A dog is the only thing on earth that loves you more than he loves himself.” — Josh Billings

In the past six months or so since my pal Noah died, I have avoided writing about him, other than one relatively short piece that I wrote to honor his life with memories of his character.

That post is still available to read, here:

http://therealowner.com/dogs/an-ode-to-noah/

I haven’t done so because I am a coward; it hurts a lot, still, and I have a hard time typing through the tears… just as I am now.

But, I wanted to share this with everyone, and say only this…. if you have not ever had the privilege of knowing a dog (note I do not say “own” or “possess” or “have”…. dogs are people, period, and such terms imply, and create, chauvinism that prevents you from ever understanding the true nature of yourself, much less the dog….), and of living with one, then you have not truly experienced what Love can be. Even with another person, Love has limits; for a dog, there are none.

So, any who…. before I am unable to do this at all, I will now post a photo, which I found on Facebook, I believe. It also might have come from the blogging site, Dog Leader Mysteries, which is dedicated to saving homeless and shelter dogs… located here: http://dogleadermysteries.com/ If this doesn’t touch your heart, nothing in this world can save you…. I’ve entitled it….

The Last Will and Testament of Noah Dog….

If you cannot read it because the text is too small, right click on it, click on “Open with”, and let the default photo viewer open it in a window where you can enlarge it sufficiently to read…. and thank you for taking the time…. Blessed Be….
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Okay, my day is destroyed now… but in a good way……

…… The space you see here between the dots is a metaphor. It represents the four minutes I just took to get up and walk away until I could control myself. Whew! As I mentioned in the introductory paragraphs, I never know what I’m going to be writing about, and this may be about the clearest indication of the truth of that I can give you. The idea of including Noah’s Will in a Pearl has been circling around in my head for all the time since his passing, but today was the first time I have been able to follow through. In some ways I am glad, because it is now something I can cross off a list.

Alas, this issue is on more than one list, so, I’m sure I’m not done processing the feelings I have around Noah’s life and death; we were together for fully 17 years, and it’s only been six months since his demise. If not to you, it’s obvious to me I have some tears still to shed over that…. but, I’ve never been ashamed of tears, like most of the men I’ve known. Not that I let them rule me, but I believe it is human to feel the strong emotions that create the urge to give up our life’s blood (water) to express our emotional pain in a physical way. And I have nothing against being human….

Enough of my rumination…. I’m starting to annoy myself…. 🙂 Well, as much as I ever do, anyway….. and I’m sure you’re getting tired of all the dots between thoughts…. so I’ll bring this to a crashing halt, here. Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Kowabunga!

gigoid

Ned Moore, aka gigoid, is a 70 year-old, (!!!… When did that happen?….), retired dilettante, who would rather read than eat, most days. His first blog, "gigoid’s folly", has been emailed out to folks he knows for about 18 years now. He still considers it his best defense against angst, and the ever-present specter of sheer insanity..... Due to rigorous curmudgeon training requirements, he has discontinued his Facebook presence, but still indulges in the occasional Twitter session... In essence, he's socialized, but, not overly sociable; all labels and stereotypes are forbidden in his presence... and he doesn't care what anyone thinks about that..... In fact, he doesn't want to talk anymore.... If you feel you MUST contact gigoid, his email address is: alphagigoid@gmail.com You can go read now.... Go on, beat it.... gigoid, the dubious

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gigoid

Exploring Consensual Reality

Tag Archives: Ogden Nash

Such beauty lives without shame….

Savory bytes of digital dessert….

Evolution is charged prix fixe….

Rejecting all palliative measures…..

Ferrets don’t elect their kings…..

Emerald green tofu makes better ballast…..

The Grand Vizier wishes to be disturbed….

A predictable failure to perpetuate…..

Plain as the zit on your face….

Real fun begins in the burrow….

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