Negotiations broke down early this year….

Ffolkes,
Today’s offering is a tribute to the power of procrastination. Or will be, if it ever gets done. Of course, to get done, it would be well to get started, but we don’t want to rush into anything, now, do we? In order to become a master of procrastination, as I am, one must learn that timing is everything. Work cannot be completed until JUST the right moment arrives, and there is no way to tell ahead of time when that might be. It all depends on the Wild Hair Syndrome, which, as we all know, can strike at any random moment….

But, once the Wild Hair has been combed, the words can flow, and another Pearl can find its way out into the cold, cruel world for all to see and enjoy. (Well, hopefully…) We’re expecting our own Wild Hair to show up any second now…. If you like, while we are waiting, we can discuss the weather, or, how ’bout them Giants, eh?…. No? Hmm…. politics?… No?…. a little rant?… No?…. oh, wait, here it comes now. Just look at it! Shiny and tall, with fresh color! It really duded up for this occasion…. Well, let’s get ‘er combed, so we can be on our way…. hand me that soldering iron, would you?…..

There, that should do it…. Okay, we may now proceed to our regular order of business, and end this period of professional procrastinating. It has been brought to you by your favorite Dutch uncle, gigoid, who hopes that you have enjoyed the interlude, and invites you to come on back any time you want to hang out awhile & accomplish absolutely nothing…. shall we Pearl?….
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A monk said to Joshu, “I have just entered this monastery. Please teach me.” 

“Have you eaten your breakfast?” Joshu asked. 

“Yes, I have,” replied the student. 

“Then you had better wash your bowl.” — Smart Bee

This little story, a typical Zen lesson, is a good example of why the Eastern philosophies have always appealed more to me than the typical Western mode of thought. The student is led to a point in the story, then left to find the actual lesson for themselves, forcing them to use their ability to reason in order to reach the teaching point. The lesson is thereby much more strongly reinforced, by the experience of searching for the answer to the puzzle, teaching both the lesson in the words (take the first step first, then the second….), and the lesson in the act (stretch your mind to find the truth…).

This method of teaching, and of learning, is much more effective, as well as more efficient than the typical formats that Western society tends to use. Here in the Occident, the teacher stands before a group of students, and gives out structured lessons, with a lot of memorization and rote learning of long passages from religious texts.

The students then take tests that determine how many factoids they have remembered, thus indicating how much they have learned…. to conform. Of course, they don’t learn how to reason, but you can’t have everything, and the ability to reason among the general populace is not highly prized, nor encouraged, among the hierarchy of Western leadership. They much prefer their subjects to be ignorant and pliable, thank you….

Irony: Limbaugh saying that dittoheads think for themselves. — Smart Bee

Hmm…. this is developing rant-like characteristics, and I don’t wish to go there… but it’s hard not to. It’s getting really difficult to not pay attention to the degree of craziness currently present in society. For goodness sake, Romney is going to be the Republican candidate; it’s a numerical lock now. Romney….

Here is a man with no integrity whatsoever, none. A man who has spent his entire life pursuing wealth at the expense of the taxpayers, and been very successful at it, too. He grew up privileged, was an elitist bully all through school, and has spent his entire career in public office changing his story to fit whatever he felt people needed to hear to get elected.

Not only has he lied time after time, often just making things up on the spot, but he doesn’t hide any of it. It’s all there for anyone to see, AND NOBODY SEEMS TO CARE! It’s like, “oh well, he’s all we’ve got, so we’ll overlook his dishonesty, his lack of self-control, his bigotry, his lack of qualifications, and his obvious lack of compassion for women, immigrants, gays, blacks, latinos, and almost every American that isn’t a white Christian”….. None of that stuff is being counted against him, and I don’t get it…. It’s like all of his worst features, as a human and as a politician, are completely invisible to his supporters, while simultaneously being all-too-obvious to the rest of us…..

It’s hard to trust the American voting public; I’ve seen too many instances in my life of them voting the worst possible way (Nixon, for one, two Bush’s for another…. and let’s not get into Reagan this morning, I don’t have THAT much time….)  I’m hoping, for sure, that some rationality will break out on the first Tuesday in November, and we will elect the incumbent for another term.

Barack’s made some bad moves, but mostly is trying pretty hard to get some good stuff done. Now, if he would only step away from those Executive Orders on National Security, I could feel a lot more comfortable with him…. as it is, he remains in the “not to be fully trusted” category due to his political pundit status…. He did, after all, seek the office, and that is a strike against him in my book. 

NONE of the beloved ruling class can be fully trusted, and if you don’t believe that, well, you are living in a different world than the rest of us…. You should probably think about upgrading your security…..

And don’t forget to wash your bowl….
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As further proof of Serendipity…. one never knows where good advice can be found, until it hits you in the head….

    Be like Han…. damn good advice, in my world…. of course, in my world, Donald the Trump would play the part of Darth Vader…. eerie resemblance of spirit there, isn’t it?….
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While Europe’s eye is fix’d on mighty things,
The fate of empires and the fall of kings;
While quacks of State must each produce his plan,
And even children lisp the Rights of Man;
Amid this mighty fuss just let me mention,
The Rights of Woman merit some attention.
— Robert Burns, Address on The Rights of Woman, November 26, 1792

Now, here is something you don’t see every day…. support for Women’s Rights written by a man. A pretty famous man, at that. It’s very heartening to me to find this, as it indicates some hope. Apparently, even 200+ years ago, there were men around who were able to throw off the indoctrination all males are given from birth, in conjunction with the oppressive set of behavioral rules set for women, and be able to see how unbalanced our patriarchal society has become. 

For centuries, men with no honor, and no integrity have been the ones who make the laws of our society; those laws, naturally, favor men, assigning women to a lifelong position of subordination. Anyone who feels that this is inaccurate is welcome to provide examples of the opposite viewpoint; I am confident there are none of significance, having made a careful study of the matter for many years.

As of this year, the issue remains volatile, and relevant. Congress is considering, at this very moment, a bill to make women’s pay more equitable in comparison to their male counterparts in the workforce. In fact, looking at those who support the bill, and those who do not, is a pretty good way to see just how divided society remains on the issue. Rationally speaking, equality for women isn’t something debatable. Even hardened conservatives hesitate to come out and say they don’t support women’s rights, though they continue to vote that way.

To me, it is incomprehensible that it should still find supporters outside the church hierarchies of most religions; they are the ones with the most to lose, should things change. But, in reality, there would be no net loss to society if women had equal status with men in a legal sense. The only effects would be positive, at all levels; that much is obvious to anyone who looks closely at the possible outcomes.

Alas, Mankind is not in the habit of making decisions rationally; if we were, we wouldn’t be in the fix we’re in. Maybe, maybe, things are changing a bit, and this bill will tip the scale toward a more sane reality. “Free our sisters, free ourselves…”  It was true when I first heard it back in 1968, and it’s true now…. and I still have hope, fool that I am….
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Once again, procrastination wins…. a bit later than some, earlier than others, but, I’ll take it. Doesn’t matter now, anyway, as it’s done, and I can’t get it back in the bottle….  Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you…..


Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Kowabunga!

Endless variations of spiral complexity….

Ffolkes,
If I can convince one more neuron to wake up and smell the coffee, I’d have a functional synapse, and I could get started. Sadly, none of them seem to want to join the party, so I’ll need a few moments here to gather up some wherewithal before I jump all the way in…..be right back….

Well, I managed to find a few old, semi-retired neurons sitting around in the corner of my mind, and convinced them to put in a couple hours for me. My mind feels as if it is an old four-cylinder Ford, started with a crank, and sputtering & coughing like an old sow, but it’s running, so I’ll take it…. not much choice at this time in the morning….

“Inside every old person is a young person wondering what happened.” — Terry Pratchett.

Now that I AM old, or at least nearly so, I am experiencing something I think everyone does at this age, to wit: surprise and dismay, both of which stem from the lack of material in the manual. You know, the manual we all are issued at birth, the one that tells us what we can expect at the various stages our lives go through. What manual?, you may ask….

Well, that’s another part of the problem here. Not only is the manual sadly lacking important information, but the process of issuing them is pretty hit and miss. I myself, like so many others, never did find the copy I was issued; it seems to have disappeared sometime before I learned to read. I’ve heard from others that the same is true for them; they never saw it. So, there is either a conspiracy, or the system has serious flaws.

I know I would have appreciated having a bit of advance knowledge of puberty; it might have made it seem less like unending purgatory. And a little notice of the trials and tribulations of male/female relationships would have come in very handy, too. Then, just when I get to an age where I begin to feel a little confidence in how much I know about life, age sets in, with all its glorious new physical challenges, mental strikes, functional failures, and internal issues. The whole bladder issue is one that nobody likes to talk about even when it is present; nobody gives any warning about it, that’s for sure…..

“Everything has been said before, but since nobody listens we have to keep going back and beginning all over again.” — Andre Gide, Le traite du Narcisse

Ah well, I suppose that if there actually were a manual, most folks wouldn’t read it anyway… If computers are any indicator of how little people use the manuals that come with them, then we wouldn’t have the acronym RTFM as a common complaint amongst the geeks who fix computers….( RTFM = read the f___ing manual! ).

However, I would use it, even if no one else did; being part geek has given me some respect for manuals, though little of that is for those who write them. Those guys seem to delight in emulating Will Shakespeare, trying to make their manual more difficult to read than everyone else’s. I think there is a school in Japan dedicated to teaching students to torture the English language for use in technical manuals…..

Well, enough of this…. it’s all just a roundabout way of minimizing my daily morning complaints, most of which are age-related. It’s probably time we got to today’s program, or it won’t get done at all…. Shall we Pearl? Off we go then….
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In the 17th century, Kikaku, one of the ten disciples of the great Japanese poet Basho, composed a haiku:

Take a pair of wings
From a dragonfly, you would
Make a pepper-pod.

Basho told Kikaku: “That’s not a haiku. You kill the dragonfly.” Kikaku recomposed the lines:

Add a pair of wings
To a pepper-pod, you would
Make a dragonfly.

— Amal Naj, PEPPERS

I really don’t have any discussion here, except to say that I like the solution that Kikaku came up with to the criticism from Basho. I have to disagree slightly with his opinion as to what a haiku must be, but his genius lends power to that opinion, for sure. I like both of them, however…. and the contrast between the two is a clear indication of the power of words, and how they can express such different ideas using virtually the same words in a different pattern, changing only one word from one poem to the next…. exquisite!
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Being But Men

Being but men, we walked into the trees
Afraid, letting our syllables be soft
For fear of waking the rooks,
For fear of coming
Noiselessly into a world of wings and cries.

If we were children we might climb,
Catch the rooks sleeping, and break no twig,
And, after the soft ascent,
Thrust out our heads above the branches
To wonder at the unfailing stars.

Out of confusion, as the way is,
And the wonder, that man knows,
Out of the chaos would come bliss.

That, then, is loveliness, we said,
Children in wonder watching the stars,
Is the aim and the end.

Being but men, we walked into the trees.

Dylan Thomas

I’ve always liked the work of Dylan Thomas, though I find it to be a bit heavy on the emotional scale. His feeling for modern culture was precise as well as broad, and his style of writing strips bare the bones of reality to display the truth that hides there. This poem is one of his more elevated pieces, and as such it appeals to that side of my nature.  🙂  It’s also a good way to cut down on how much I have to write, as my words are less essential than decorative in such cases…. lazy, but efficient, yes?….
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“All of us who are concerned for peace and triumph of reason and justice must be keenly aware how small an influence reason and honest good will exert upon events in the political field.” — Albert Einstein

I have a lot of respect for Albert Einstein. I consider his time on Earth to be a perfect example of a life well lived, as his every action was based on reason and good will, and his dedication to the betterment of mankind was both constant and sincere. This observation of his is one of many that indicated that good will, as well as being an accurate description of reality in the political arena. Today’s headlines bear ample proof of that….

I read today that Mitt Romney has secured enough delegates to sew up the Republican nomination for the Presidential election coming in November of this year. This, to me, is both heartening and dismaying….

It is heartening because I believe firmly that as long as he continues to speak in public, he will continue to alienate and essentially “piss off” enough people to ensure a Democratic victory for the incumbent. Unless something drastic happens, like a five month case of laryngitis, that keeps him from speaking at all, he is bound to spout enough outrageous nonsense to sink his own boat. That much is certain, given his track record….

But, it is also dismaying, in that I cannot believe that there are that many people in this country who believe the tripe that he has been serving up for consumption. His stands on women’s rights, LGBT rights, same sex marriage, immigration, economics, foreign policy, separation of church and state, and almost every other subject that has come up are so far to the right, they can’t see the middle. It is frightening to think that there are so many millions of people who buy into this crap.

In reality, I probably shouldn’t be surprised, as I firmly believe there is no limit to human stupidity, but it is unsettling to say the least, to know that there are that many folks out there who refuse to use the few functioning neurons they possess for anything other than procuring food, and, unfortunately, breeding….

I’m trying to have some faith in the American voting public, but it scares me nonetheless, as faith is so often disappointed by reality. If the election is anything other than a landslide in favor of Obama, then my faith will have been unfounded. I find it unacceptable in any way to contemplate Romney in the Oval Office; we would be involved in a war within days, and probably with our own citizens. Society will dissolve into its various parts, and conflict will be rife amongst all of those segments. Almost every word that escapes Mitt’s lips is divisive, elitist, and discriminatory against one part of society or another, and his administration would create that atmosphere with every ill-considered act.

I hope I’m wrong in my fears. I don’t think I am, but hope so, for if what I think could happen does happen, then the world will become a much more dangerous place to live. If the Republican party regains control of this country, I can see revolution not far off, as the underlying conflict between the forces of ignorance and those of reason will be facing each other on a daily basis, and that can only lead to conflict.

So, let’s pay attention ffolkes, and make sure to register, and to vote. Either way, I’ll be stocking up on ammunition, tightening my own security procedures, and hoping I never need to employ any of them….
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Well, that was a polite little rant, wasn’t it? And I didn’t even call any names! Perhaps aging has mellowed me a bit…. Nah! No way…. Only one day to go to payday, so things are moving along nicely, and I can look forward to eating tomorrow….  🙂    Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you…..


Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Kowabunga!

It gives truffles a bad name….

Ffolkes,
One of my most strongly held beliefs is that “regret” is a useless emotion, and should be eliminated from those feelings I allow myself to entertain. This, or course, assumes that I can actually control what I feel, an assumption that, while true in the realm of possibility, is not always so in reality. Our feelings just happen, often as a reaction to new information or a surprise event (though we can control what happens inside us, for the most part, we cannot do the same in the real world, outside us….). Thus, we sometimes must suffer feelings that are not welcome, at least until we are able to banish them with our will. Regret is one that I try to root out at its first appearance, as it does nothing to help resolve anything, especially not whatever has caused it.

Some religious moralists will point out that regret can be useful in preventing future similar situations, but I challenge that presumption as overly optimistic, as well as morally manipulative. More often, I would say, regret causes us to avoid the type of situation where it might occur, not out of morality, but out of guilt, and fear. Plus, the situation that regret avoids may be one that is necessary to improve one’s lot, if only it is faced squarely, and resolved, rather than regretted, and avoided. Fear and/or guilt are never good motivations to act upon, except in situations of impending life or death, when the speed it adds to an honorable retreat is welcome. Any other time one acts from fear, the result is generally “regrettable”……

Why have I started out with such a serious subject? Hell, your guess is as good as mine. I just started typing, and this is what came out….. I think I was having some thoughts of regretting getting out of bed, which, since I was already up and typing, served no real purpose. Hence, this short, somewhat mellow diatribe….. it could be worse. I could have started in on health issues, always a pleasant topic, and always available for discussion, what with their daily insistence on being in the forefront of my consciousness. It can be hard to ignore my carpal tunnel symptoms when one hand is numb while trying to type, for sure….. But, I didn’t want to take the chance of driving the Gentle Reader away so early in the morning by creating too many unpleasant images…. bad policy, all around….

So, we’ll just fly with what I’ve written so far, relatively useless as it is for any purpose beyond filling space in the intro section….. We have more important fish to fry than to “regret” what has already taken place….   🙂    Shall we Pearl?…..
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“I used to think it was awful that life was so unfair.  Then I thought,  wouldn’t it be much worse if life were fair, and all the terrible things that happen to us come because we actually deserve them?  So, now I take great comfort in the general hostility and unfairness of the universe.” — Marcus, Babylon 5

Here is one of those statements that, at first look, does not appear to be particularly important, or helpful. But, after a second look, it grows…. and, in reality, I have to remark that it is a pretty good way to look at life in its most real sense. If one can come to understand, and to believe in the indifference of the Universe, then its apparent malice becomes moot.

We all know of terrible things that happen in this world, and many of them make no sense to us; it’s hard to understand why little children have to die in natural disasters or fires or such events. There is no reason that we can find, and none that anyone can give, that will explain or expiate such a tragedy to the parents of the children.  Sometimes the violence that can shatter lives is perpetrated by other people, sometimes the Universe itself seems to have picked out the weakest, most vulnerable targets upon which to display its irresistible power. However it occurs, it will never seem fair, or just, nor can any justification be offered that would assuage the pain that is engendered.

Thus it becomes an important tool for us to be able to accept the unfairness that is inherent in the indifferent nature of Mother Nature. She doesn’t mean to be cruel; it is just the way it is.  If we choose to believe that the world is fair and just, then we can only believe that She hates us, both individually and as a species, for she regularly presents us with reasons to do so, if we assume her hostility. No other explanation fits the evidence.

Unless, of course, one learns to understand that there is no special animosity on Her part, it is just Her way of expressing Herself, and we happen to be there when She does so. In the final analysis, it is quite a comforting thought, to know that we are not the special target of all that goes wrong in our lives…. we’re just lucky, I guess…..  🙂
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“Prayer carries us half way to God, fasting brings us to the door of his place, and alms-giving procures us admission.” — The Koran

As may have been guessed, I find the precepts and concepts that are put forth by most organized forms of religion to be not merely false, but deliberately so, in order to foster the control over people that is the sole intent of such organizations. No matter how pure they claim their motives are, they are no more interested in the well-being of their devotees than they are of anyone outside their church. This is true not only of every Christian sect I have examined, but of other major religions as well. The above serves as evidence in favor of this observation, as well as showing that I don’t apply this to only one religion; it is a hidden purpose behind all of them.

Now, let us examine the above statement. If we take away all the guilt-ridden phraseology, and strip away the delusions that are presented, we can re-state this more accurately as…. “Let’s talk to our imaginary friend to ask for favors we don’t deserve… then we’ll put our bodies in great stress in order to experience hallucinations that we are in the presence of our imaginary friend…. and to top it off, we’ll give our hard-earned money to the ones who tell us to worship, so they can build golden domes to the everlasting glory of the supposed deity. Hmm, makes perfect sense, eh what?

I’m not going to go into a huge rant today; I’ve got some stuff to post later that precludes any long, drawn-out discussions. But, I didn’t want all the Christians out there to think I pick on them exclusively, or that they are the only targets of my critical eye. No sirree, they are not…. any religious organization that puts out the kind of crap as listed above is my target, and they certainly don’t have to be Christian (though, in truth, I don’t believe there ARE any organizations at all that would actually deserve to call themselves such, as none of them follow His teachings closely at all… mostly they’re not even in the same ballpark….) .

Muslims, Hindi, Buddhists who mistakenly give Gautama godhead, Taoists who foolishly look for god instead of understanding of the Way, Baptists, Episcopalians, or any other such organizations that exist, in reality, solely to support a priest-hood, a group of men (usually… women don’t seem to lead these movements, though they often fall prey to them) whose only interest in other people is how much power over them can be obtained; these are what I choose to speak out against, with all the intellect at my disposal. Call me Don Quixote, if you wish, but that’s just the way I am, by deliberate choice….

“The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened.  But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself.” — Friedrich Nietzsche
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“Abolition of a woman’s right to abortion, when and if she wants it, amounts to compulsory maternity: a form of rape by the State.” — Edward Abbey

Here is perhaps the clearest statement of this idea that I’ve seen in a long while. Of course, it is an opinion that will be vigorously opposed by a great many people, too many of whom are women who have been brainwashed to believe that their male masters have the right to make such decisions for them. These women have abrogated their very person-hood, their entire feminine nature, becoming mental and physical slaves to men who have no right to call themselves such.

The arrogance and misogyny that is implied, and proved, by those who would disagree with this statement by Mr. Abbey is astounding. I regard such an attitude as evil, plain and simple, and only those who refuse to acknowledge reality as it is, instead of how they wish it to be, are able to give credence to such flagrantly dishonorable ideas. It is, to say the least, disheartening to realize the extent to which the average person will allow themselves to give up the control of their own minds, just so they don’t have to make the effort to decide what is right for themselves. It is much more to their advantage to go along with what is obviously wrong, as it feeds into their own egotism and misplaced arrogance.

And I say, fuck ’em. When any assholes who would argue with a woman’s right to control her own body speak up in my presence, I will never fail to put them straight, even if it entails reading to them from the Book of Righteousness (ref: Louis Lamour, from any Sackett novel), after tactfully pointing out the errors in their thinking. 

In fact, when such opportunities arise, I have a hard time preventing myself from advancing directly to that step in the discussion at the first asinine platitude that escapes their mouth. That first blow always sends a particularly pleasant shock of power from my fist to my shoulder at first contact, and though usually unnecessary, makes a second blow very tempting. But, if I do that, they’re not awake to hear the lesson….. Oh well, assholes, all of them….

“What’s on your mind, if you will allow the overstatement?” — Fred Allen
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“He that doubteth is damned.” — Romans 14:23

It took a while, but it was worth the time spent searching…. This is a perfect example of how the folks who would have us believe that the Bible (or any other sacred books inspired by supposedly supernatural entities) is a direct line of information from God, will go to almost any lengths to trick us into doing exactly what that book tells us to do. I have previously written here as to the value that Doubt has in the bag of tools people have to get by in this complex, confusing universe we inhabit. It is our only defense against information or events that can cause, or even intends, us harm, rather than good; such information invariably is given to us by other people whose only intent is to achieve some sort of power or control over us. I don’t think this is a particularly hard concept to understand; its proof lies in almost every interaction we have when faced with organized religions.

This short little warning/threat implies that any who do not bend over in submission to its decree will spend eternity in Hell. Hmm, a bit harsh, don’t you think? For merely entertaining a question regarding the accuracy of a concept presented with no evidence that proves its reliability? The Universe at large presents such false information regularly, and anyone who doesn’t learn caution in such instances is liable for the consequences, which can be severe, such as in the case of being confronted by an apparently friendly, but in reality, rabid dog. Rabies is no picnic, from all reports, so Doubt in such instances is very appropriate, and useful.

But, in the minds of the folks who are selling faith-based products, Doubt is the last thing they want people to have in mind when considering what they say. It tends to cause their arguments to fall apart right in front of their eyes, and they cannot make the sale that way. If they can’t convince people to accept what they say without questioning it, their entire house of cards will come tumbling down around their ears, and they would have to give up all those nice little perks that go along with having everyone believe everything they say, like having poor people willingly give up 10% of their earnings in tithe, or free rent in a house built by the labor of others…. Did you think they would give that up easily?…. Well, then you’ve lost your strongest ally against such degradations to your sensibilities…. a healthy sense of Doubt….

“Fear not, for I have given you authority to do so.” — Smart Bee, via some random preacher’s King James version….
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She what was honour knew,
And with obsequious majesty approv’d
My pleaded reason. To the nuptial bower
I led her blushing like the morn; all heaven
And happy constellations on that hour
Shed their selectest influence; the earth
Gave sign of gratulation, and each hill;
Joyous the birds; fresh gales and gentle airs
Whisper’d it to the woods, and from their wings
Flung rose, flung odours from the spicy shrub.
— John Milton (1608-1674) — Paradise Lost, Book viii, Line 508

Once again, I have included a poem here, just because…. What I’ve written above is serious enough, and a little balance is called for…. and here it is…. enjoy!
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Okay, so, not so bad for an off-the-cuff sort of morning…. a fairly eclectic group of observations, fraught with my customary sardonic views on most everything. Without even going back to re-read yet, I’m going to let it fly…. even though I know in my heart that once gone, there is no retrieving any of it…. but, hey, what’s life without some risk, eh? Pretty damn boring, that’s what…. so, enjoy, or not, as you will… if not, feel free to comment on any of it. And if you do enjoy it, I’m glad to hear that too… not necessary, though, a simple click on the “Like” button will suffice to make my day….  🙂

Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you…..


Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Kowabunga!