Phone the philatelic psychologist in Philly…. not the phony Philistine from Phnom Penh….

Posted on April 8, 2014 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

I suppose, if I weren’t retired, this blogging idea would be at best, hard work, and at worst, impractical as a means of supporting one’s self in the style and/or comfort to which I’ve accustomed myself. As in most of the world’s “jobs”, unless one is at the very top of the heap, the rewards are, shall we say, less than stellar?…. No, let’s go with what they actually are, which is shit…. No sense in calling a spade a spade, if you’re not going to do it when it counts….

The snakeheads who have the rest of the word in thrall have arranged matters so that the entire structure of recompense for labor is bass-ackwards, rewarding the leaders completely outrageously, with more money than they could ever spend, far more than the effort they expend is worth, while those who sweat and labor with their body, rather than with the mind, are rewarded with a wage that is, quite frankly, not enough to support the physical effort, much less enough live on, and certainly much less than it is worth, both in and of itself, as well as in relation to the efforts of the management types….

This inequity mirrors the overall imbalance under which society labors, because the people who make the decisions know, if they once gave in, and allowed the world to begin operating in a balanced, even-handed fashion, where all the levels of society were equal to each other, in an economic sense, they themselves would not only no longer be in charge, but would probably have been chased into the mountain fastness, to lose themselves in the wilderness, in order to save their sorry asses, from the VERY ANGRY people who finally realized how badly they had been fooled and manipulated for so long.

That society, however, is just a dream…. We’ll never see that world, so, I’ll just carry on with my personal quest to educate the ffolkes I can who drop in to read, hoping that what I write may stimulate some thought, which would eventually lead to action. It’s no doubt a futile dream, but, it keeps me typing, so, I’m good with it…. Besides, I AM retired, so what else would I be doing, except driving myself crazy, with no outlet for all this dross and drivel that spills and spews out of my head all the fucking time…..

Okay, throttle it back a little there, partner, let’s not get away from ourselves….. yet. That only works when the audience is fully engaged, and, at this point, we’re lucky if I am fully engaged….. We’ll worry about the rest of the ffolkes later…. For now, I think I’m going to make an executive decision, to get us safely, and quickly, out of this intro, which is threatening to get away from me again, as it does each morning…. Luckily, today, I noticed, so we can just use the old hip-bump defense, and slide right over into the rest of today’s experiment in psychological self-abuse….

Shall we Pearl?…..

“It is not necessary to light a candle to the sun.” — Algernon Sidney (1622-1683) — Discourses on Government, Chap. ii, Sect. xxiii

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Ffolkes, I can’t do this anymore today…. For some reason, my physical state is rapidly deteriorating, and I’m going back to bed for awhile…. I’ll get back to you when I can…. Today’s Pearl, then, is a wash, though it DOES have ONE redeeming factor to its credit, which is the poem below…. That, and the closing are all you get today….. but, given the power of Mari’s poetry, it may just carry the whole load….

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Since I’m really a nice person, here is a poem to clear your palate, so to speak…. This poem is by a poetess of great power and beauty, not only in her work, but in her persona. You can find her work on her WordPress site….. Whenever I need to spend some time in a place in my head, where I can find inspiration, reading her work never fails to bring me there….

The web address where she writes is at: http://starsrainsunmoon.com/2014/04/06/perhaps/ Unless your soul is already dead, there you will find LIFE, PASSION, PAIN, JOY, and BEAUTY, all in wonderful, incredible abundance…. Enjoy!…..

Perhaps

I feel a little superior
Raised above a circle
Where blinded lions place their grief

A masterpiece to the end
A luxurious wailing, sequel’d enough
Tyrant enough, inheriting a death
Of falsehoods, a heavy heart composure
My only audience is I – against age
My very own pity, the tragedy of this write

Fooled by reflex – it’s late he says
Brief rules of mercy, damp against his hands
Eloquent as my uncomplaining flank

~~ Mari Sanchez Cayuso ~~

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Nothing to see here, you can go on to the final section….

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Okay, that’s it for today…. Sorry, ffolkes, I didn’t even have the energy to look for archived material to put in today…. I’ll do better tomorrow, unless I still feel under the weather…. No telling now what THAT might look like…. See ya, ffolkes….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid the dubious

Standing in the pentagram, she began to chant….

Posted on April 7, 2014 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

In ringing dulcet tones, a fanfare sounds above the muted roar of the crowd, heralding the entrance of a stunning couple, tall and golden….. The room sighs in admiration as they saunter with ineffable elegance through the massive ballroom’s doors. Hand in hand, they cross to their host, offering their obeisance; though we are in Hollywood, royalty is royalty, and jealous of its privilege.

As I watched the swirling dancers and milling celebrities, rubbing shoulders in a good cause, all I could think about was the woman I’d seen on my way to the door, rummaging in the garbage in the back of the mansion in which we all stood….. I wondered what any of these elegantly dressed swells would say about their good cause, if they knew the woman had once lived here….

Hmm…. well, it’s not Faulkner, by any means, but, it got me here, to this paragraph, so I can count it a success, as that was its only task…. I hadn’t tried my hand at a fictional opening for some time, and figured, what the hell, it’s only 3:30 AM, & I’ve got plenty of time…. It’s not the best I’ve ever done, though it has its points of merit; I’ll let it fly, & not expect much from it…. That way, when it bombs, I can say I knew it all the time…. Hey, it’s a small victory, but, a man’s gotta take what he can get at this time of the day….

Why am I up again at 3 AM? Well, honey, I’ve given up trying to figure it out…. The cat, of course, played a part, by trying to get under the covers, but, that shouldn’t have been enough to make it so I couldn’t sleep any more… Even if I DID go to bed at about 8 PM, I should have been….. Oh, wait…. that’s right….. That makes seven full hours, doesn’t it? Okay, so maybe I WAS done sleeping, and was right to get up…. I sure wish I would tell myself this stuff earlier, before I go making a fool of myself…. Bozoid tendencies or no, it’s too damn early to be making that sort of mistake in my own story…. One could get the impression I’m not altogether “with it”, don’t y’know?…

In spite of all evidence to the contrary, I DO know whereof I am existent, though that perception can change in a heart beat; I’ve always been subject to unpredictable moments of perceptual convulsion, wherein the Universe seems to expand rapidly, then shrink…. Oh, wait, the Universe IS expanding and shrinking…. what was I thinking? Okay, now I’m pissed…. Who got me started on this? I want them in my office, NOW!…. I could have been seriously injured by the explosion!….

Sorry about all that, ffolkes…. It can be hard getting good help these days, even if I do pay more than minimum wage. Of course, in the process of bringing all the above into some sort of proper perspective, you may find yourself a bit confused, but, no worries, that’s to be expected on mornings such as this…. The emergency clinic has been mad aware of the potentially dangerous situation, and will be standing by to treat any possible further episodes of convulsive reasoning, which can be not only debilitating, but serves as a delicious and healthful snack….

What? You wanted sober reasoning…. Sorry, ffolkes, all I’ve got today is the convulsive sort. You’ll have to make do, as I’m already showing you how it needs to be done, in order to fulfill all the legal requirements. Not that we worry much about that; we’ve avoided getting any citations for years, ever since the last time when we had that little accident…. The poor deputy they sent is still receiving treatment for his psychosis….. Honest, we didn’t mean to let out the choir while he was in the foyer trying to decipher the warrant; they just started in on him, & after ten minutes of holistic hosannas, he was never the same….

Okay…. I think I’m done for the moment…. All morning, since sitting down to stare at the blank screen, snuffling and aching until the morning doses of caffeine & cannabis had a chance to take effect, I’ve been in a strange mood, even for me…. It’s hard to pinpoint a reason, as we humans are complex creatures, and our motivation for anything we do can be pretty obscure, even to ourselves….. which may be an unconscious indicator pointing to the whole problem we humans have in getting by in the world without causing so much damage, to the world, and to each other…. Ah well, I don’t think I’ve got anywhere NEAR enough drugs in me to start on THAT subject…. Instead, we’ll do this……..

Shall we Pearl?…..

“Costing not less than everything.” — T.S. Eliot

“Everybody gets free BORSCHT!” — Zippy the Pinhead

Hmm, again…. It seems I’m even odder than usual today, because I could NOT decide which of these was more appropriate to put here…. which is why you see both…. Be warned, ffolkes…. it might get a little strange today….

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Maybe, if I include something from an old Pearl, things might have a chance to settle, and we’ll be better able to see what we’re about…. We can hope, anyway…. here is a religirant from last year’s files…. Enjoy!…. I did….

From 5/28/2013:

What do you think? Is it time for a rant, perhaps, a religirant? I think so…. They haven’t done anything particularly stupid in public of late; some of the fundamentalists must have broken down and started listening to their lawyers. They’ve been careful lately about saying stuff that not only infuriates the rest of the country, but are probably legally actionable as slander. But, they’ll still ask you to send money, so they can afford to carry on God’s work…..

“They say give your money to God, but they give you THEIR address.” — Smart Bee

On my recent trip to Texas, I went by a church by the highway, and did a complete and classic double-take when the name on the sign registered. I don’t know if it is the one that keeps getting itself in the news, but it said it was the Westboro Baptist Church, home of the world’s most clueless, hateful, and ignorant preacher. Well, the sign didn’t say the last part, that was mine, but it’s still true, if it IS the church that has, for the last three or four years, made itself infamous, and the target of every other Christian in the US, for dragging the good name of Christians in general through some pretty dark mud, and flinging the rest of the mud on everyone it can see…..

These folks, and the idiot who leads them into their idiocy, are perhaps the stupidest people on the planet, if a willingness to display that stupidity, time after time, on national TV, is any indication, all in spite of the constant and strident statements from the entire rest of the world that they are not just wrong, but stupidly wrong, in each and every one of their stated objectives. Wrong, that is, according to every other interpretation of the Bible’s words by every Christian scholar in the world, except themselves.

These ignoramae refuse to even look at what they are doing, and have absolutely no clue of how completely ridiculous they appear to everyone else in the world. In a way, it is really sad, or would be, but for their vicious vindictiveness, and the vulnerability of their victims, the people they label as blasphemers and devils, just for being different in some way. In their ignorant blundering around like bulls in a china shop, they hurt the feelings of people who are already suffering, and do so deliberately…. Not just stupid, these assholes, but cruelly so….

“Some men become proud and insolent because they ride a fine horse, wear a feather in their hat or are dressed in a fine suit of clothes. Who does not see the folly of this? If there be any glory in such things, the glory belongs to the horse, the bird and the tailor.” — St. Frances de Sales

This is their justification, their rationalization for their actions, which they MUST KNOW to be wrong; no one breathing could possibly be THAT stupid, so much so as to not know their own cruelty. But, like all Christians do to at least some degree, in order to maintain faith, they can rationalize anything, as long as it supports their belief in their own rightness…. This is a necessary attribute for anyone attempting to live in reality according to the rules dictated by a delusion, and, in fact, is most likely a purely human characteristic, common to the believers of ANY religion.

“Well-timed silence hath more eloquence than speech.” — Martin Fraquhar Tupper

At this point in this discussion, I think this final quote can point the way out of such a distasteful subject. My hands already will need to be washed thoroughly after this stuff, so I may as well close it by saying this…. The people in the world who have decided to allow fear to dictate their entire approach to Life, and submerge their intelligence in the pursuit of an idea that has no real connection to the real world, in order to spare themselves the effort of dealing with life directly, by condescending to use their own minds. That being said, I can finally give them their precise due, which means, I no longer need consider them, at all…. which also means I don’t have to waste my time talking about them any more….. Bully good news for y’all, don’t you think?…. I’m going now….. See?…. I’m already gone…..

“To perceive is to suffer.” — Aristotle, De Anima

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Here is one of Poe’s better works…. yes, I’m opinionated. Deal….

Dreams

Oh! that my young life were a lasting dream!
My spirit not awakening, till the beam
Of an Eternity should bring the morrow.
Yes! tho’ that long dream were of hopeless sorrow,
‘Twere better than the cold reality
Of waking life, to him whose heart must be,
And hath been still, upon the lovely earth,
A chaos of deep passion, from his birth.
But should it be- that dream eternally
Continuing- as dreams have been to me
In my young boyhood- should it thus be given,
‘Twere folly still to hope for higher Heaven.
For I have revell’d, when the sun was bright
I’ the summer sky, in dreams of living light
And loveliness,- have left my very heart
In climes of my imagining, apart
From mine own home, with beings that have been
Of mine own thought- what more could I have seen?
‘Twas once- and only once- and the wild hour
From my remembrance shall not pass- some power
Or spell had bound me- ’twas the chilly wind
Came o’er me in the night, and left behind
Its image on my spirit- or the moon
Shone on my slumbers in her lofty noon
Too coldly- or the stars- howe’er it was
That dream was as that night-wind- let it pass.

I have been happy, tho’ in a dream.
I have been happy- and I love the theme:
Dreams! in their vivid coloring of life,
As in that fleeting, shadowy, misty strife
Of semblance with reality, which brings
To the delirious eye, more lovely things
Of Paradise and Love- and all our own!
Than young Hope in his sunniest hour hath known.

~~ Edgar Allan Poe ~~

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Due to the unpredictable nature of my mood today, I’ve avoided creating anything fresh….. I’m too familiar with the results of indulging such moods to allow one to affect today’s effort, which is already hovering around the “too weird even for gigoid” category. To assuage any lingering guilt for having shamelessly used the archives to fill in today’s post, here is a random, harlequin pearl to finish off this mess…. So much for vaulting ambition, eh?….. Let’s go see what SB can come up with for us today….

“Time is the great legalizer, even in the field of morals.” — H. L. Mencken (1880-1956), “A Book of Prefaces”, 1917

“Be brave enough to live creatively. The creative is the place where no one else has ever been. You have to leave the city of your comfort and go into the wilderness of your intuition. You can’t get there by bus, only by hard work, risking, and not quite knowing what you’re doing. What you’ll discover will be wonderful: yourself.” — Alan Alda

“If we don’t know life, how can we know death?” — Confucius

“The Tree of Learning bears the noblest fruit, but noble fruit tastes bad.” — Smart Bee

“It is a maxim universally agreed upon in agriculture, that nothing must be done too late; and again, that everything must be done at its proper season; while there is a third precept which reminds us that opportunities lost can never be regained.” — Pliny the Elder (23-79 AD) — Natural History, Book xviii, Sect. 44

“It is never too late to give up your prejudices.’ — Henry David Thoreau, Walden

“For the things we have to learn before we can do them, we learn by doing them.” — Aristotle, Ethica nicomachea II (c. 325 B.C.)

I keep telling you…. it’s all in the wrist, see?….

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Given the state of my mind this morning, I’m pretty well satisfied with this effort…. Nothing here will cause any bleeding, unless, of course, one rolls it up and strikes oneself in the face with it. I’d suggest NOT going that route, as it can lead to unwarranted accusations of self-abuse, a tough start to any day. Better to just read it with a certain degree of suspended judgment, and leave any build-up of angst and/or resentment to those simple folks who cannot comprehend their own ignorance….

Thus, having adeptly alienated anyone who doesn’t speak piffle, or at least another language that can help them to translate my alt-English into spoken, or written English, I will do the merciful thing, and end this here…. Y’all should probably check yourselves in the mirror before heading out into the public; it got a bit messy in here today…. See ya, tomorrow, I’m hoping….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid the dubious

Watching the Founding Fathers spin like a top….

Posted on April 6, 2014 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

Having long been cognizant of the danger involved in living a life of free will, I accept that danger, without qualm or resentment, as the just cost it represents for the boon of living free. As our favorite Founding Father, Tommy J, was fond of saying, “The price of freedom is eternal vigilance; it’s cost is counted only in the blood of its defenders.” Well, I think he said it; it might have been one of the others…. but, it SOUNDS like mi amigo Tomas, so I’m going with that. The danger, as it turns out, is not from the world at large, so much as from the Australopithecan inhabitants of that world, specifically a certain small part of the impossibly fecund group of naked, hairless apes who infest the surface of the planet with me….

Now, this may sound as if I have a rather poor opinion of my fellow man…. In that, you would be right, insofar as it goes. Individually I like some of them very much, and tend to try to spend what time I have to interact with those whom I can get along with, just like everyone else… The rest of them, as far as I am concerned, are pretty much superfluous, in most ways, and I figure the world would be a nicer place if they’d all just go away somewhere where they won’t bother those of us who only wish to get along, without trying to take advantage of anyone else….

The small group to whom I refer above, however, make the process of living with them a veritable pain the bloody ass, as they have no more desire in Life than to steal from everyone else….. These assholes will lie, cheat, & ultimately, will act, literally, in any way they feel will get them what they want, no matter how unethical, or immoral it may be. Their entire purpose in life is to see that THEY, and they alone, are in control of other people, and of the resources our society uses to maintain life and culture; in that purpose they are single-minded, quite ruthless, deliberately heedless, and completely uncaring, as to how much pain and misery they may cause to other people in the process of achieving their goals.

Now, the assholes who act like this are not a very large group of people…. but, for all of our history on this world, over 5,000 years, at least, this small group of snakeheads have conspired against the rest of humanity, diligently working to set themselves up as the oppressive, shadowy forces behind the Powers That Be in life, a task at which, for the most part, they have been quite successful. The number of people in the world who are in essential control is much smaller than the grand majority of people are aware…… These are NOT the people who get elected, or however they are chosen to lead a nation; the real power lies with those who control those leaders from behind the scenes, telling them what they can and cannot do…..

This number, of the true masters of our society, is, realistically, far less than a thousand men and/or women, world-wide…. Once the structure of control has been established, it doesn’t take a lot of manpower to maintain the status quo, since the vast majority of people in the world are not aware of the true picture of how society is arranged…..

This cluelessness, I might add, is a sufficient degree of ignorance to enable those in power to remain there as long as they wish…. They have had a very long time to practice the skills they need to remain both in charge, and in the background, and they are VERY, VERY GOOD at them, believe me…..

I know these people are out there; I also know that they know they are not completely invisible, due in part to others such as myself, who refuse to leave in place any of the wool they keep trying to pull over our eyes. They know exactly what writers and/or ffolkes are out there in the world, who are watching them WITHOUT being fooled…. Hell, they probably have our addresses, and an idea of how many weapons we keep on hand….

They don’t care, as long as they are able to maintain their control, and their obscurity from the public eye…. If, by chance, the majority of the blind, ignorant public became aware of how much they are controlled, and for how long they have been the dupes of these human predatory vultures….. well, those shadowy snakeheads wouldn’t last very long…. A mob of humans is an ugly thing, with no conscience at all, once it has been set in action….. There is little chance of it ever happening, but, hey, there’s always hope, right?….

I note from the above that my rant for today can be considered as done…. Since, despite the evidence presented thus far, my brain is NOT in what I’d call “sharp” status, I think I’ll take this as it lies, & not worry too much about how it got there… That’s probably for the best, as I don’t have a bloody clue as to how it all came to be…. Hell, I’m not sure exactly what I’m doing right at this moment, much less have I kept track up to now…. it didn’t seem necessary, and, now, it would be more dangerous than what we’ve already done, so, we’ll stop here….

Whew! Thank goodness…. it almost got away from me there…. Now that we’re back in the saddle, so to speak, let’s ride, or, dive, whichever is more appropriate…. I think we’ll dive, as we have the scuba gear, and nothing to ride, anyway…..

Shall we Pearl?…..

“If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your own estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.” — Marcus Aurelius

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“Come hether freind, I am ashamed to hear that what I hear of you… You have almost attayned to the age of nyne yeeres, at least to eight and a halfe, and seeing that you knowe your dutie, if you neglect it your deserve greater punishment then he which though ignorance doth it not. Think not that the nobilitie of your Ancestors doth free you to doe all that you list, contrary-wise, it bindeth you more to follow vertue.” — Pierre Brondell

When I found this, I thought it would make a good beginning to a rant, since it speaks to the concept of responsibility for one’s actions as a leader…. Then, I saw this one….

“Example is the school of mankind, and they will learn at no other.” — Edmund Burke (1729-1797) — Reflections on the Revolution in France, — Letter i, On a Regicide Peace, Vol. v, p. 331

Recognizing the truth of this, I realized that, as in the rant in the intro section, I’m wasting my time, not even preaching to the choir, but to the flock of geese in the yard….. SIGH….. Oh, well, I suppose it had to happen sometime….. So, rather than bore y’all any further with such superfluous agitation, we’ll go with an old-school style pearl, to try to set some sort of example, to teach something about the true nature of our Beloved Ruling Class, and the shadowy corporate snakeheads who tell them what to do…. Let’s see what SB can find for us today, shall we?….

“Of all the forces in the universe, the hardest to overcome is the force of habit. Gravity is easy-peasy by comparison.” — Solomon Einstein (Terry Pratchett, “Johnny and the Dead”)

“The difference between fantasy and science fiction is that one hast honest politicians scrupulous lawyers, and altruistic doctors, while the other only has beings from outer space.” — William John Watkins

“Is it a bigger crime to rob a bank or to open one?” — Smart Bee

“Let thine occupations be few,” saith the sage. — Marcus Aurelius Antoninus (121-180 AD) — Meditations, iv, 24

(I was going to put in an explanation of this pearl from Marcus Aurelius, but, I decided, no, you should figure out for yourself just WHY it is here….)

“Government lies, and newspapers lie, but in a democracy they are different lies.” — Smart Bee

“In the United States…politics is purged of all menace, all sinister quality, all genuine significance, and stuffed with such gorgeous humors, such inordinate farce that one comes to the end of a campaign with one’s ribs loose, and ready for “King Lear,” or a hanging, or a course of medical journals.” — H. L. Mencken

“As Mankind becomes more liberal, they will be more apt to allow that all those who conduct themselves as worthy members of the community are equally entitled to the protections of civil government. I hope ever to see America among the foremost nations of justice and liberality.” — George Washington

SIGH…. as for the last quote, all I can say is, so much for THAT idea….. Good idea, George, but, nobody’s interested in that stuff anymore…. At least, nobody in OUR government….

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“All poets are mad.” — Robert Burton, The Anatomy of Melancholy

Robert is, as we all know, correct in this assessment…. But, who’s counting, anyway?….. Here is another of my old poems, because nobody else deserves a fate like this today…. Here is one, written back in 2012, in reaction to the advancing effects of aging on my health and well-being…. Call it a lament, or call it a paean to patience…. You can call it what you like…. I just call it a poem….

Raging at Aging

As old as you feel, we are told, is old as you are,
custom assures such vision will carry us far.
Reality begs to differ, may it be so bold
it is really quite painful, and very, very cold.

The power and strength felt in our halcyon youth
desert us with age, yet another unwelcome truth.
Irony rules our time here on this bountiful earth
as we reflect the changes over time since our birth.

As physical powers fade from this fragile shell,
we learn our mind can serve us quite as well.
The strength that once filled our bones and hearts
is now applied by our will, to more arcane arts.

Life’s greatest gift is our freedom of choice
no matter how often we forget, we still get a voice.
Energy, or apathy, by our will we may choose,
failing to do so, our only way to lose.

Each of us lives in the grip of time and space,
always seeking our balance, our own chosen place.
One must accept reality, for it is true at the core,
all we can do, is all we can do, and nothing more.

~~ gigoid ~~

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“It may be said that his wit shines at the expense of his memory.” — Alain Rene Le Sage (1668-1747) — Gil Blas, Book iii, Chap. xi

“A wit with dunces, and a dunce with wits.” — Alexander Pope (1688-1744) — The Dunciad, Book iv, Line 90

“Ahhh. A man with a sharp wit. Someone ought to take it away from him before he cuts himself.” — Peter da Silva

Aha! I finally found a place for these!….. I’ve been holding these three connected pearls for some weeks now, trying to find a place for them…. Since I’ve treated y’all today to a perfect example of the point of these three little barbs, I’ll just say that, all of these, taken together, form an idea that fits me like a Texas catheter, which, if y’all know anything about nursing, is an article of medical purpose which, once applied, will NOT fall off the appendage to which it is strapped, until it is meant to…. which is a delicate way of saying y’all should be careful when I’m slinging pearls around…. They can, if not respected for the damage they can do, make y’all wish you were never born….

That being said, here is another old-school pearl, whose only parameters for inclusion were set at “odd”, and “funny”…. Of course, you have to go by MY standards on both of those, but, hey, you’ll like it….. Trust me…

“Everything takes longer than you think it will.” — Murphy’s Law Corollary 2

(Including completing the consumption of this Pearl…..)

“During the invasion of Sicily in World War II, General George (“Blood ‘n’ Guts”) Patton was preparing to take the city of Palermo. He checked with his meteorologists and learned the day he had chosen would be incredibly rainy. So he issued an order to place copies of the New York “Times” immediately beneath the tailgates of the transports carrying his troops. In this way the men could keep their feet dry. His staff was mystified. Why the “Times”? Why not the New York “Daily News”? Patton was adamant; and one did not argue with the General. As five tons of old copies of the “Times” were being loaded, the General issued one of his greatest quotes to the assembled war correspondents: “THESE ARE THE ‘TIMES’ THAT DRY MEN’S SOLES.” –Smart Bee

(My abject apologies for that…. but, I couldn’t resist…. You may groan as loudly as you wish; you may even voice as many epithets as you desire….. Just don’t throw any of the articles from the pocket in the seat back in front of you…. Thanks….)

“Mothers are fonder than fathers of their children because they are more certain they are their own.” — Aristotle

“America will tolerate the taking of a human life without giving it a second thought. But don’t misuse a household pet.” — Dick Gregory, The Shadow that Scares Me, 1968

The Preacher, the Politician, the Teacher,
Were each of them once a kiddie.
A child, indeed, is a wonderful creature.
Do I want one? God Forbiddie!

— Ogden Nash

“The believer is happy. The doubter is wise.’ — Hungarian proverb

“Go on, EMOTE! I was RAISED on thought balloons!!” — Zippy the Pinhead

I really love it when a plan comes together….

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Having thus completed the obligatory number of rants, or rant-like substances, including two old-school pearls, I am now authorized to bring this to a close, without fear of annoying any of the bureaucrats who keep tabs on this sort of function…. The poem was a bonus inclusion, due to the habit of those same bureaucrats to completely ignore all poetry, as being outside their purview and/or perception. Now, aren’t you glad you stayed to the end?….

Okay, I’ll shut down my incredibly over-zealous ego now, putting the lie to the old saw about never knowing when to shut up…. I can bust a preconceived notion with the best of them, as long as I have something with which I can replace it, in the traditional pantheon of necessary incongruities, with which reality is decorated whenever we gather like this…. Plus, it gave me one last opportunity to practice my nonsense and blather, without actually having to open a new package….. On that obscure note, I will release you from all bondage, and begone….. See ya, ffolkes, if I’m still relatively sane tomorrow….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid the dubious

Twisted versions of classical toilet accessories….

Posted on April 5, 2014 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

I’m thinking the old saw about “Early to bed”, etc., is either a crock, designed purely to force dogmatic prejudices upon unwilling members of religious flocks, back when the preachers were not quite so thoroughly entrenched as the teachers of morality for our species, OR, it’s a typo rooted in being misheard….

I think the actual statement originally went “Early to bed and early to rise, makes a man wealthy and wealthy, but not very wise.” To my way of thinking, this makes a LOT more sense, from a quality of life standpoint….. The other way is just how the preachers and snakeheads WANT you to believe, as it gives THEM the power over you they crave….

You see, they’re the ones who reap the benefit when you get up early, work hard, & go to bed, all without ever trying to use the brain you were given at birth…. These manipulators, the dogma-bearers and the snakeheads who reap the benefit of all your hard work, will tell you anything at all, without any reference to truth or reality, as long as it will get y’all to do what they want, which is to accept their words as truth, & to do as they say, not as they do….

What amazes me the most about this system is that it WORKS AT ALL! How can anyone, anyone with a brain, one that has more than three functioning neurons, allow themselves to believe such bullshit, just because they were told it was true when they were so young they knew no better than to accept what they were told by an elder…

“Children are to be won to follow liberal studies by exhortations and rational motives, and on no account to be forced thereto by whipping.” — Plutarch (46-120 AD) — Of the Training of Children

As long as people allow the corporate snakeheads, so ably assisted by the dogma-dogs, who have been manipulating mankind right along with the money-lenders since we first lived indoors, to fill our heads with bullshit like this, the world will never change, not in any way that will help you and me….. In our world, as it exists today, only the shadowy corporate slave masters ultimately benefit from what happens in the world at large….

I’m not sure what prompted this mini-rant here in the intro, but, it’s all true, so I’m going to not worry about it, and just get on with today’s program, such as it may be…. The above paragraphs MAY be the leftovers from the rant below, much of which was written yesterday afternoon, when I first saw the article in question…. It got me going pretty good, so, this is probably the consequence of the remaining bit of angst from that episode, that drove me to such depths of passion….

So be it…. it’s a good thing, I think, to use our minds first thing upon awakening….. The shock brings us out of sleep mode rapidly, and I’m pretty sure it adds to the clarity of expression that we are seeing. Hope springs eternal….

Regardless of all that, it’s done, and done well enough we can go on without any lingering guilt or resentment for having to contort ourselves unfashionably to create an opening section….. Not bad for an old fart with flat feet, frequent flatulence, & a startlingly bad attitude, all housed in a frail, broken old body, that strangely resembles a Frisbee-toting, card-carrying denizen of the wilds of Berzerkeley, as they looked back in the old days, when hippies roamed free upon the land…. The grey hair down to my waist, thin as it may be, is a dead giveaway, isn’t it?

Shall we Pearl?…..

And here, poor fool, with all my lore
I stand no wiser than before.

— Johann Wolfgang von Goethe (1749-1832)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“In God We Trust.” I don’t believe it would sound any better if it were true.” — Mark Twain

Boy, it sure wouldn’t, would it? But, you can add that particular phrase (“In God….”, etc.) to all the others coined by the snakeheads, and the BRC, to justify their social interactions, all of which serve THEIR ends, not yours…. Having the populace believe the above makes for a very easily manipulated group of people, all of whom are primed to believe whatever they’re told, by someone on TV wearing a suit with a flag pin, or up in the pulpit….

Now we’re supposed to believe them when they talk to us about spying, and lying, and generally being the assholes they cannot help but be…. ( Hmm, a bit awkwardly phrased, but you get my drift, right?…)

http://www.sfgate.com/news/politics/article/Senate-committee-OKs-release-of-CIA-torture-report-5375716.php

Following this line, in summary of the most critical of the information contained therein, I have copied an excerpt from the above article, a brilliantly obscure statement of compliance (?), kinda sorta, from some guy who works at the CIA. That critical excerpt, taken directly from the above, is this:

“CIA spokesman Dean Boyd said his agency would “carry out the review expeditiously,” but suggested the process may be difficult.”We owe it to the men and women directed to carry out this program to try and ensure that any historical account of it is accurate,” Boyd said….”

That’s right, that’s what he said, right out there in public, where it was recorded by numerous reporters…. This person, this… Boyd person, is the mouthpiece spokesman for the CIA, an agency whose very existence, (its raison d’etre, its excuse for being part of our world at all), is to provide intelligence (in the form of information, a task that does not necessarily require significant levels of IQ in its operatives…. Flexible morality, yes, but, not IQ points….) from outside the borders of the USA, by inhabiting, and exploiting, the world of shadow, the battlefield of covert operations in other countries, using techniques and methods of operation based on illusion, misdirection, misinformation, and lies…. This is common knowledge, and not subject to debate…. look it up in their charter documents….

This Boyd person, and I use the term loosely, by making this statement, obviously expects us to believe that his agency, whose very existence is rooted in lies and the spread of misinformation, is ready, and willing to give us, or anyone else, an ACCURATE picture of what they’ve been up to? I don’t know about y’all, but, I’m insulted….

In fact, I can’t recall at the moment anything more egregiously untrue, or as insulting, since Nixon’s “I am not a crook!” back in the 70’s…. Or, maybe, Shrub, Senior’s “Read my lips… no new taxes.”….. Since the sheer illegitimacy of both of those statements has long been a forgone conclusion, no longer a matter of debate, I’d say it’s a fair assessment to make of this particular little piece of verbal bullshit…

http://www.sfgate.com/news/politics/article/Cuban-Twitter-heads-to-hearings-in-Congress-5375669.php

Then, searching further among the headlines of BS we are supposed to buy into, we come to the LATEST of the clandestine shenanigans our beloved Barry, and his “transparent administration” has been up to in the last few years….

Without bothering to actually TELL anyone, some government lackeys, encouraged by the “Arab Dawn” phenomenon in the Middle East, an event whose roots were nourished by the social networking capabilities of Twitter and Instant Messaging technology, decided to attempt to foment rebellion in Cuba among the youth of that country, by deliberately setting up a social network of their own, using it to not only encourage dissent, but, also, (they like to multi-task…) to gather information about the users in Cuba…

Well, I’m shocked…. just shocked, I tell you…. What a surprise, eh? To think that our Beloved Ruling Class here in America, land of the FREE (~~white Christian minority~~) would stoop to such egregiously deceitful and deliberate influencing of public sentiment to further their own interests, why it just makes me feel so…. slimed…. Which is how the Cubans must have felt when they found out it was all a sham…

Boy, there’s sure nothing like going around the world making new friends and influencing people, right?…. Christ on a crutch, what the fuck were they thinking? Have these assholes become so blinded by their own sense of entitlement they can’t see just how STUPID that is? Apparently not, which is what will come out, I think, in these hearings…. More stupidity, that is….

It’s all a big clusterfuck, just another example of entitlement gone wild and crazy, making the pundits and elected assholes at every level believe they can be as stupidly obvious about their self-serving avarice as they wish, and nobody will ever care, or catch them at it…. which is a concept, given today’s world, that is not only easily seen as more than just a little stupid, it approaches the level of severe mental retardation…. Having spent a lot of time, (3+ years), taking care of people whose average IQ hovered around 4, I can testify that this sort of belief is about the only sort of which they are capable…..

They’re all a bunch of smarmy, self-serving, avaricious assholes…. and THAT, my friends, is me being NICE!….. I merely used a bit of vitriol, with only one questionably unwarranted word of insult…. I COULD have been extremely nasty, turning viciously vulgar, without breaking a sweat, or becoming at all disconcerted…. Yep, I could have said, fuck them all, really hard, right in the ass, (unless, of course, they LIKE that….); then, kick their sorry asses right down to the lowest levels of the hell they so richly deserve…. but, I won’t say that….

gigoid, the dubious, has spoken. So be it….

“…. I’m IMAGINING a sensuous GIRAFFE, CAVORTING in the BACK ROOM of a KOSHER DELI –” — Zippy the Pinhead

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Today is another day with mostly fresh material…. which means I’ll need to use another of my old poems, to protect the innocent… Here is one I wrote last December; obviously, I had the above rant in mind, or one like it….

Accentuated Lessons

Bold statements of calculated intent
Become common rule of the malcontent.
Avarice assumes such attractive wear
Beguiling deception, illusory and fair.

Grasping and pulling with ghostly hands
Legally proper in all the signatory lands.
Seeking and finding each vulnerable soul
Anguish as payment for exacting the toll.

Wraiths of commerce’s invisible dead guards
Still haunt the dreams left in sad empty yards.
While absentee nobles sit in stiffly elegant splendor
Served by sad-faced detainees in abject surrender.

Escape from reality is illusory at best
Often we falter and fail its daily test.
Only when focused on inner strength
Does peace stay with us for any length.

Peace lies within, always…..

~~ gigoid ~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I’ve ranted, twice, if you want to be picky, and found a poem to fit in with the rest…. Y’all know what that means, don’t you? Yep, it’s time for an old school pearl…. Some might say it’s about damn time, too…. Let’s see if SB can do it all by itself today…. All I’ll do is push the buttons…. Enjoy!

“It also seems to me that the rudest word, the rudest letter are still more benign, more decent than silence. Those who remain silent are almost always lacking in delicacy and courtesy of the heart.” — Friedrich Nietzsche

“People are divided into two groups – the righteous and the unrighteous – and the righteous do the dividing.” — Lord Cohen

“Aren’t you beginning to feel time gaining on you? It’s like a predator. It’s stalking you. You can try to outrun it with doctors, medicines… new technologies. But in the end, time is going to hunt you down – and make the kill.” — Soran, Star Trek, Generations

“A wise man first determines what is within his control; all else is then irrelevant.” — Epictetus

“It was not for nothing that the raven was just now croaking on my left hand.” — Plautus (254-184 BC) — Aulularia, Act iv, Sc. 3, 1, (624.)

“The nobler a man, the harder it is for him to suspect inferiority in others.” — Marcus Tullius Cicero

“He knows not when to be silent who knows not when to speak. — Publius Syrus (42 BC) — Maxim 930

I, having learned to do both, shall now be silent….

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I’m impressed…. Yes, even I have to admit this one is pretty decent, as well as one of the smoothest ever, in terms of how well it went onto the screen…. I’m not going to tempt our old pal Murphy by trying to continue to write any further, but will use a variation of method #4 to bring this to a screeching halt…. See y’all mañana, ffolkes…..

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid the dubious

Breaded tofu balls? Dry toast on a stick? Deep-fried butter? What DO ex-presidents like, anyway?….

Posted on April 4, 2014 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

I just spent a good twenty minutes trying to find a pearl to put here today; I feel a bit old fashioned, sort of, which prompted me to think it might help get things moving…. Everything I found was, however, much more appropriate for use elsewhere, so, ultimately, I gave up, & here we are…. If I still had fear of the blank page, I’d be trembling and sweating by now, but, having trained myself to show no emotion in crisis situations, we’ll wait a few moments before we start to panic….

Not that I haven’t been known to panic, in the past, no sir…. In fact, it’s one of my best things…. I do get tired of cleaning up the messes that generally are left after such outbursts; maybe I shouldn’t carry grenades before lunch anymore? I don’t know, I kind of like the noise when they go off, and the screams of rage from next door are always a treat to hear…. I hate that guy, so pissing him off is a bonus….. This morning, fortuitously, we can count on NOT having to do any clean-up, as I’m out of grenades…. more’s the pity….

Baseball season has started again….. how ’bout them Giants, eh? What? A bit louder, I’m having a bit of earwax buildup going on in both ears….. Oh, I get it…. Well, ma’am, yes I do know I just lost half my audience by making the sports reference…. but, that half will go home & complain to their other half, which means in about twelve or so minutes, we’ll have a new influx of guys, all of whom don’t mind talking baseball… I mean, it’s like Dave Barry once pointed out, when he said, with startling alacrity, not to mention accuracy, “Most women, when asked to make a decision about whether they should save a baby, or catch an infield fly, will say they would save the baby, without ever considering how many men are on base, or how many outs there are….”

Hey, what’s all the abuse for? It’s not THAT old of a joke, is it? Boy, anyone would think I was getting paid for this….

I suppose I let myself in for that sort of abuse when I use such an obviously chauvinistic joke….. I generally try to avoid any sort of gender-based humor, because we men and women have a hard enough time getting along, or understanding each other…. We don’t need the extra stress placed on us by the addition of being made fun of, even with the gentlest touch, or in the most tactful language…. Any and all confusion that can be avoided is a good thing, in my mind; there is already too much we DON’T understand about each other to keep creating misunderstandings, or poking at sore spots….

Oh, look…. We’ve stumbled and bumbled our way through another intro section, this one seemingly oblivious to all direction…. but, it works for me. In fact, it is such a good one, given its contrast with the usual crap you find here, I may see if I can do it this way again…. Of course, that would mean figuring out just what the hell I DID first…. I’m not sure I can figure the odds on that one, but, I’m so giddy with glee from being done with this section, I’m going to just ignore the rest, and get on with the day’s shenanigans….

Shall we Pearl?…..

“Adam was but human — this explains it all. He did not want the apple for the apple’s sake, he wanted it only because it was forbidden.” — Mark Twain (1835-1910), “The Tragedy of Pudd’nhead Wilson”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When I read the following articles in yesterday’s news, about the government’s abortive attempt to destabilize Cuba using a social networking platform they built, I fully intended to rant about it, as it clearly indicates the administration’s continued demonstration of their contempt and disregard for the American citizen’s right to privacy, as well as the complete debunking of our civil rights as outlined in the Bill of Rights…. It pisses me off royally, especially now that the White House is trying to defend its clandestine activities with more lies, even when confronted about them…. How can anyone think they can explain a lie with another lie?….

I am SO angry about this one, I can’t rant right now…. I’m going to have to let this percolate for a while, to organize my thoughts on the matter; right now it would come out as a threat of violence, which I won’t be ready to carry out for another little while…. Instead, I’ll again use an old-school pearl to vent what I’m feeling, and take some shots at the pundits who are making me crazy with their asinine contortions in the public arena over this spying issue….

It all makes me want to buy a gun; moreover, it makes me want to use it….. Instead, following the links, are a group of pearls, with the specific purpose of making me feel better, by striking out at the fucking assholes who keep showing how much they hate Americans…. even though we keep electing them…. I suppose it’s natural for bullies to disrespect their victims, isn’t it?….

“The reasons which any man offers to you for his own conduct betray his opinion of your character.” — Sir Arthur Helps

http://www.sfgate.com/business/technology/article/US-secretly-built-Cuban-Twitter-to-stir-unrest-5372422.php

http://www.sfgate.com/news/world/article/White-House-defends-Cuban-Twitter-to-stir-unrest-5374712.php?cmpid=hp-hc-nationworld

“An hour’s perusal of our national charter makes it hard to understand what the argle-bargle is about. The First Amendment forbids infringements of the freedom of speech “except for commercials on children’s television” or “unless somebody says ‘****’ in a rap song or ‘chick’ on a college campus.” The Second Amendment states that “the right of the people to keep and bear arms shall not be infringed,” period. There is no mention of magazine size, rate of fire, or to what extent those arms may resemble assault rifles.” — P. J. O’Rourke

“The fact that Hitler was a political genius unmasks the nature of politics in general as no other can.” — Wilhelm Reich

“All lawyers should be shot.” — William Shakespeare

(Policy note: Did you ever wonder why so many politicians were lawyers first? I did, but, then, I went, “Oh, right…. Follow the money.”)

BOUNDARY, n. In political geography, an imaginary line between two nations, separating the imaginary rights of one from the imaginary rights of the other. — Ambrose Bierce, “The Devil’s Dictionary”

“If it weren’t for lawyers, I think we could have invented a universal symbolic representation of reality.” — Smart Bee

How oft the sight of means to do ill deeds
Make deeds ill done!

— William Shakespeare (1564-1616), King John — Act iv, Sc. 2

“It’s the RINSE CYCLE!! They’ve ALL IGNORED the RINSE CYCLE!!” — Zippy the Pinhead

Okay, I feel better….. Now, if only we can get them to rinse!….

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I’m thinking I’ve inflicted enough of my own poetry on y’all for a while…. Here is a wonderful little translation of a poem from a colleague, if not a contemporary, of Li Po….

Full Moon

Above the tower — a lone, twice-sized moon.
On the cold river passing night-filled homes,
It scatters restless gold across the waves.
On mats, it shines richer than silken gauze.

Empty peaks, silence: among sparse stars,
Not yet flawed, it drifts. Pine and cinnamon
Spreading in my old garden . . . All light,
All ten thousand miles at once in its light!

~~ Tu Fu ~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The shadowy corporate snakeheads, (“snakeheads” is my newest shortcut name for the 1%,the rich and powerful who control the money and resources of this planet…. I use it because it is the English translation of the Chinese word for “slaver”, human traffickers who who dupe, or kidnap men, women, and children selling them into prostitution and/or slavery…. Thus, it becomes the perfect word to come after “corporate” when referring to one of those assholes….), who control the world, in their campaign to secure their position as the rulers of humanity, influenced the Shrubs enough during their terms in office that the Supreme Court justices they picked to replace dead judges were all their conservative buddies, all of whom are comfortably in the pockets of those self-same corporations. This, of course, has allowed the assholes who bought them to make even further inroads on our rights as individual citizens, by establishing the rights of corporations as superior to the rights of an individual….

A couple years ago, this led to the Citizens United decision, which gave the money-grubbers the opportunity to spend even more money on influencing politicians and elections, by forming giant Political Action Committees, where they could funnel millions of dollars into holding organizations, where it could be used for influencing elections, and to bribe congressional lawmakers…. That decision is a big part of how the Republican Party has managed to pass so many conservative laws in states around the nation, such as anti-abortion laws, and voting regulations which allow them to manipulate themselves into office, by providing obstacles which prevent the supporters of those who oppose them from voting….

Yesterday that decision was reinforced by yet another decision eroding our protection against corruption, a decision which removed most of the limits on how much money an individual can contribute, thus giving rich, avaricious, corrupt billionaires more say in Congress than the average citizen can match, allowing even more money to find a direct route into the Congressional pockets…. Below are two articles, from two sources, to offer a slightly different viewpoint (insofar as the media CAN be even-handed in their reporting….), just so we’re not limiting ourselves to one view…. C’mon back when you’re done, for what discussion may follow….

http://www.sfgate.com/politics/article/Supreme-Court-strikes-down-overall-political-5371989.php

http://www.usatoday.com/story/news/politics/2014/04/02/supreme-court-campaign-finance/4481675/

I’m pissed…. I’m so pissed, all I feel like doing is sitting here typing obscene names to call those assholes, in Texas (where Jr. lives….), Maryland (I think that’s where Shrub, Sr. lives…), and Washington D.C, at the courthouse, (where the Supremes hang out….)…. My next feeling, which somehow reminds me very much of sheer, unadulterated rage, is one that may just prompt me to go out, find a gun store, giving in to the urge buy the guns I’ve been considering…. Don’t worry, I won’t forget the ammunition…. I may have been a practicing pacifist for a long time, but, mostly, at least in terms of personal survival, that was just a pose to get the draft board off my back…. I have no issue with the use of force in support of what I believe is right…

For today, though, I’ll give myself some slack, which will give you some relief, from having to listen to my ranting over stuff we can’t change…. At least, nothing will change without resorting to drastic measures, in which most ffolkes are unwilling to engage, lest they risk increasing their karmic burden…. I figure it this way…. If we DON’T give up our insistence on non-violence, we are all going to die….. that is for sure and for certain, if things don’t change very soon….

That means there won’t be any next reincarnation, not on this planet, because it won’t have us; we are being evicted from this plane of existence… So, I don’t have to worry about coming back as in a form with less karmic status, as we won’t be coming back HERE at all…. Our energy configuration will just have to find some other reality to inhabit, because Mother Earth isn’t likely to rent to us again…. We’re too hard on the property….

Ah, the hell with it…. I’m pissed…. or did I say that already? Okay, I’m done…. Since I’m not organized or coherent enough to produce a true rant (I don’t consider this loud complaint a rant…. not enough reasoning, or quite enough structure….), I’ll fall back on another old-school pearl to close this out for the day….. I’ll bet you’re cheering inside, right?…. Okay, then, here, have it your way….

“Ignorance doesn’t kill you, but it makes you sweat a lot.” — Haitian proverb

“Faboo!, Would you like to see me make bubbles with my spit?” — Wakko Warner

OCCIDENT, n. The part of the world lying west (or east) of the Orient. It is largely inhabited by Christians, a powerful sub-tribe of the Hypocrites, whose principal industries are murder and cheating, which they are pleased to call “war” and “commerce.” These, also, are the principal industries of the Orient. — Ambrose Bierce, “The Devil’s Dictionary”

“There’s nothing wrong with you a shotgun blast to the face couldn’t fix.” — Smart Bee, from gigoid’s political fantasy files

— Bother! said Pooh, as he rolled another joint for the President.

“And took for truth the test of ridicule.” — George Crabbe (1754-1832) — Tales of the Hall, Book viii, The Sisters

“Every nation ridicules other nations, and all are right.” — Arthur Schopenhauer

Perfect…. I have only one thing left to say, to wit:

“There are two intelligent responses to contemporary Western civilization: laughter and despair. You’ll note I’m not laughing.” — gigoid the dubious

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Well, that was certainly different…. Well, from THIS side, it was….. If I’ve done anything right today, well, y’all will let me know, won’t you? You can keep any injuries, or actionable complaints to yourselves, if you don’t mind…. or, just send them directly to my lawyers, who are hanging out at the White House….

🙂

See y’all tomorrow….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid the dubious

Malcolm patented the “three days dead” look….

Posted on April 3, 2014 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

I cannot claim to be perfectly awake just yet, but, it’s time to get started, so you’ll just have to take what you get in that respect, because I’ve sat here diddling my brain and twiddling my fingers for a good thirty minutes now, with no real effect in terms of either feeling alert or displaying any coherency beyond what is needed to pour coffee…. Maybe if I take a few more sips of the only reason worth living for in the morning, I’ll find a little bit of energy….. I hope so…. That paragraph sucks….

I’m finding a bit of a Catch-22 connected to the use of the medical marijuana at night to aid in sleeping….. Applying some of the topical pain relieving cream is useful before lying down, as it helps relax enough to drift to sleep…. but, waking up to apply more is counter-productive, to say the least, as the act of spreading it where it needs to go causes enough pain to wake me…. I eat a high CBD chocolate about an hour & a half before retiring, which acts on pain, with added drowsiness effect, for about 4-6 hours; I have to wake up twice, minimally, to down a Norco during the night, but the chocolate often makes it less critical until it wears off…

That is the catch, the wearing off part…. If I take enough MJ to last the night, then the Norco isn’t as critical to be on time…. but, if I don’t take the Norco, I get the dyskinesia side effect after about 6 hours, right when the MJ is wearing off…. This means, at that point, even if I take what I need, I will be awake until it takes effect, whether that is 45 minutes for a Norco, , & up to 1½ hours for edible MJ…. So, I have to balance the 6 hour MJ effects with the minimum 4 hours of Norco effectiveness, and hope they work together…. It makes it tricky to get right, but, in the whole, I get a LOT more sleep than before I started using the MJ to augment the effects of the classic style pill…

There, now the medical report is over, and I’ve bored everyone to tears with my silly little personal issues, I suppose I should get on with what I actually started to do…. to wit: write the Pearl for today…. I guess I got off on a tangent there, and fell right into Chatty Cathy mode before I noticed….. Oh well, it got us enough dross and drivel to call an intro, so, that’s something, I guess….

Shall we Pearl?…..

“Of course I have a smart ass attitude…. it’s a natural defense against drama, stupidity, and bullshit.” — Tweety Bird
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I originally intended to rant about this article, but, after perusing it myself, I find it’s only more proof of the prediction I made last week, as to how the pundits in Washington, (you know, those assholes who hang out at the White House, and in the halls of Congress), would be acting in the coming weeks, after the poTUS (Please note: the word president is NOT capitalized deliberately; sufficient respect for the office to justify capitalization must be earned….) stated his intention to “ask Congress” to reform the NSA regulations on spying…. So far, the president has mouthed his lies just as predicted, and the expected response has gone exactly according to what I said would occur…. It’s a gift…..

No, really, they’re going through ALL the contortions I figured they would, just as if they were paying attention to what I said…. which makes it, sort of, lacking in virtue to rail at them right now…. They’re being so PATHETICALLY stupid, it’s hardly worth the time it takes to run them down, and, in fact, doing so might just be considered abusing the handicapped….

So we’ll do this… Read the article, so you know just what they’re up to, silly as it may be…. Right now, they’re just doing as I said, and creating more questions and confusion around the issue of the torture report Senator DiFi and the Senate want to see, while Obama came out with some new, toothless suggestions for changes to the regulations that don’t really change much of anything…. all of which is muddying water that was already unclear….

After that, come back to this section, where you’ll find the latter half of this pears, which will consist of an old-school pearl, with the parameters set, once again, to shoot at our beloved ruling class, in all its ugly glory….

http://www.sfgate.com/news/politics/article/Demands-grow-to-release-Senate-torture-report-5369929.php

“Official truths are often powerful illusions.” — John Pilger, _Distant_Voices_, 1992

“This isn’t Anarchy, this is Chaos.” — Smart Bee

“How difficult it is to save the bark of reputation from the rocks of ignorance.” — Petrarch

MACHINATION, n. The method employed by one’s opponents in baffling one’s open and honorable efforts to do the right thing.

So plain the advantages of machination
It constitutes a moral obligation,
And honest wolves who think upon’t with loathing
Feel bound to don the sheep’s deceptive clothing.
So prospers still the diplomatic art,
And Satan bows, with hand upon his heart.
R.S.K.

— Ambrose Bierce, “The Devil’s Dictionary”

“I looked up the word “politics” in the dictionary and it’s actually a combination of two words; “poli,” which means many, and “tics,” which means bloodsuckers.” — Jay Leno

“Every man’s life, liberty, and property are in danger when the Legislature is in session.” — Gideon J. Tucker

“By all means, take the moral high ground — all that heavenly back lighting makes you a much easier target.” — Solomon Short

Not bad at all for a game of “pick up sticks”, post-neo-intellectual version, eh? I think, in truth, if any pundits forgot to duck, several of them COULD be bleeding now….

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Today we’ll go with a poem of my own, in order to save embarrassment for anyone else, ‘kay?….. Here’s one I wrote in 2012, such as it is…..

Semblance of Time

The dreams and visions of modern times are pallid and pale
filled with fear and loathing instead of joy and wonder.
Reality is aging poorly, submitting less data to loudly regale
Sad faded images lacking substance, or proof of thunder.

Sisters and brothers of nightly performance speak in spite
building up scars to protect, or keep a semblance of sanity.
Knowing illusion is near and dear, steeped in muscular delight
while compassion and intelligence get smothered by humanity.

Loneliness soon became the friend of many sizes of fools
stealing through mazes of social tests as if truly wise, or old
while companies of sterile opportunity are hiding their tools
from anyone who might be feeling even a little bit bold.

Painful momentary flashes seem to outline society’s fate
until soft, heavy monuments to elder gods fall from grace.
We’re all getting tired of being told we’re far too late
and never ever nearing tolerance, nor regaining any face.

A hard message awaits us all when we dare to even stay
of life’s uncaring disposition and curmudgeonly faux heart
Only with the strength of a hero may such tales make way
Only a poet may turn such pain into a valid work of art.

~~ gigoid ~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It’s looking now as if the ol’ brain just isn’t going to fire up today….. I’ve managed to fake it so far, which is fine, but, it’s going to take a strong effort to resist the urge to include a rant this morning…. If I don’t, (resist the urge, that is….), the results could be catastrophic, to say the least…. So, because we can, we’ll fall back on another old-school pearl to fill in this final section, thus preserving both the lives, and the integrity of our passengers…..

That’s fortunate, because we just couldn’t afford another set of lawsuits…. My lawyer is getting far too rich mitigating the aftereffects of my bozoid tendencies…. For now, let’s enjoy a random, parameter-less, harlequin pearl, our finest, most popular product….

“I don’t think it would have all got me down quite so much if just once in a while- just once in a while- there was at least some polite little perfunctory implication that knowledge should lead to wisdom, and that if it doesn’t, it’s just a disgusting waste of time.” — J.D. Salinger, Franny & Zooey

The rhino is a homely beast,
For human eyes he’s not a feast.
Farewell, farewell, you old rhinoceros,
I’ll stare at something less prepoceros.

— Ogden Nash (1902-1971)

“Noise proves nothing. Often a hen who has merely laid an egg cackles as if she had laid an asteroid.” — Mark Twain (1835-1910)

“It has yet to be proven that intelligence has any survival value.” — Arthur C. Clarke

“Sick cultures show a complex of symptoms … but a *dying* culture invariably exhibits personal rudeness. Bad manners. Loss of consideration for others in minor matters. A loss of politeness, of gentle manners, is more significant than is a riot.” — Friday’s boss, aka “Kettle Belly” or “Mr. Two-Canes” Baldwin…. from the book “Friday” by Robert A. Heinlein

“Laws do not persuade just because they threaten.” — Seneca, 65 AD

“Though thou be destined to live three thousand years and as many myriads besides, yet remember that no man loseth other life than that which he liveth, nor liveth other than that which he loseth.” — Marcus Aurelius Antoninus (121-180 AD) — Meditations, ii, 14

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Well, having subjected myself to the indignity of reading this whole thing, editing for errors and punching up style, as far as possible, I can truthfully say…. I’m done. No judgments I make could be accurate, given both my closeness to the material, and my lack of brain-function this morning, which has NOT improved in the two plus hours since I began staring at the screen…. If you’ll recall, it took me thirty minutes to be able to write a coherent sentence then…. I’m having the same struggle now, here at the end….

SIGH… Okay, I’ve whined enough for one day…. Now I have to go do battle with bureaucrats and business assholes, always two of my least favorite pastimes…. I have to deal with the Kaiser Pharmacy, Pat’s pharmacy, and a large wireless company…. Oh, joy…..

See ya, ffolkes, provided I can do all of this today without having to kill anyone….. It can be a near thing, sometimes, if I happen to run across a particularly stupid bureaucrat, or one of those empty-headed millennial denizens, making less than minimum wage, part-time in a wireless store…. What is it with those companies? Do they use a reverse IQ test to pick their employees, or what?…. Okay, I’ll stop ranting in the closing section now, and be off…. Ta then….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid the dubious

We’ll call it “fashionably undead”….

Posted on April 2, 2014 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

Considering the state of affairs in modern society, a relatively high degree of curmudgeonry among the citizenry is to be expected; a rough, gruff exterior is the protective barrier of choice in modern times, with good reason. We are all bombarded daily with demands upon our time, expectations upon our behavior, rules, regulations, and all sorts of other frequently frustrating demands that assault our senses, often transpiring right in front of us, necessitating our participation, if not our complete engagement, or investment….. Given all that, it isn’t particularly surprising to me that good manners have fallen by the wayside….

To a gentleman, as I was raised to be, certain behaviors are not optional; for most of today’s young men and women, those behaviors are not only unknown to them, but have been replaced with a set of expectations of entitlement, and behavioral irritants, that, for the most part, are more effective in keeping others at a distance than they are in enhancing interaction, or improving communication.

This change in what young people are taught, or NOT taught, more accurately, has resulted in a society where rudeness is the norm, compassion is seen as weakness, and manipulation of others is a survival skill….. I see most of this as the logical consequence of our BRC’s nasty habit of attempting to modify public morality through legislation, to wit: making laws to tell people how to behave toward each other….

This, of course, is really, really stupid…. and I don’t mean that in a nice sense, either….. It’s just plain idiotic to assume that the inertia needed to make ANY sort of weather change in Society at Large can be provided by a new law….. Hell, I can’t think of where the idea came from in the first place, as ANY parent of small children can testify as to just how completely useless and ineffective it is to try to teach morality through the use of punishment for bad behavior, OR for rewarding good….. People, even small, essentially unformed human beings do NOT respond well to that sort of teaching, and, in fact, will often rebel AGAINST any such type of behavioral modification, making it not just useless, but, counterproductive….

Which word, counterproductive, leads us back to reality, as our beloved ruling class continues to thrash about, mostly wreaking havoc, instead of creating order in the world, by the consistent, deliberate application of stupidity and greed….. It seems to me that it has become not only acceptable, but routine, to try to legislate morals among the populace of this nation, with the unfortunate end result of convincing those in power that they have not only the right to do so, but that there is need for it…. both of which are failures of logic, and can only lead to more problems…..

SIGH…..This isn’t REALLY a rant, you know, it’s just a discussion, one that seemed to fit in with today’s mood, enough so to bring it to bear on the introduction problem we always face in the morning…. It seems to have worked fairly well, though it’s hard to tell this early…. Sometimes, the intro has a delayed effect on the Gentle Readers….

I’ll often hear ffolkes moaning and groaning, while I’m preparing a poem, or searching through SB, as certain phrases or words from this introductory part of the morning’s mental buffet hit home, naturally producing the typical response to such chicanery. In fact, I’ve noticed a resemblance, at times, to a gathering of punsters, which produces a variety of sounds indicating the presence of “humans in dire mental distress”…..

All of which doesn’t alter the fact that I’ve once again faked my way through the intro, bringing us to the required point in the process where we can smoothly wend our way to the next section, knowing we’ve fulfilled all the legal and technical requirements…. That isn’t to say our ONLY purpose here is to meet standards…. In fact, we spit on standards…. who needs them? We certainly don’t…. Not only do we not need them, we HATE them…. We don’t want no stinking standards around here, so just take them away…..

Oops, I think my coherency just failed, so to speak…. I’m probably starting to break out in a bozoid fever…. that’s how it always begins…. It’s okay, I’ve got a plan for that…. It never works, but, I have one….

Never mind…. This is spinning rapidly out of my control…. I’m going to employ Emergency method #4, to take us out of here before anything catches fire, or explodes…..

Shall we Pearl?….

“Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of Truth and Knowledge is shipwrecked by the laughter of the gods.” — Albert Einstein
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I’m not certain that I have what it takes today to write anything particularly logical, or reasoned to any fine degree…. For the first time in several days, I didn’t sleep all that well…. Oh, it was GOOD sleep, just not enough of it: I didn’t WANT to get up when the furry alarm went off…. But, if I don’t, she picks on Pat, so, I pushed out of bed, and have been trying to wake up fully ever since, a matter of almost an hour now…. Some days it just doesn’t pay to begin the day at all….

Around here, though, we have a way to get around that little conundrum, called an old-school pearl…. I’ll just let Smart Bee pick out the parameters, and the pearls, and we’ll let it go at that, okay?…. Okay….. works for me…..

“It matters not what you are thought to be, but what you are.” — Publius Syrus (42 BC) — Maxim 78

“Whoever undertakes to set himself up as a judge of Truth and Knowledge is shipwrecked by the laughter of the gods.” — Albert Einstein

“There’s no problem so awful that you can’t add some guilt to it and make it even worse.” — Calvin and Hobbes

“Do not say a little in many words but a great deal in a few.” — Pythagoras (BC 582-507)

“We are more sensible of what is done against custom than against Nature.” — Plutarch (46-120 AD) — Of Eating of Flesh, Tract 1

“A good many dramatic situations begin with screaming.” — Barbarella

“Life is not having been told that the man has just waxed the floor.” — Ogden Nash

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Somewhere inside my mind, below the level of conscious perception where my ego resides, there is an area where poems percolate, words swimming together in an ocean of comprised of memory, perception, emotion, and reason….. I never know when there will be enough to begin leaking out into my consciousness, to create the verses which will give voice to my inner demons, because when I try to write one before it’s ready, I find nothing worthwhile, until the unconscious process, whatever it consists of, is ready to allow it all out into the light of day…. One unknown poet’s thought has always stuck with me; he said the following about writing poems….. “Poets never finish a poem, they merely abandon it.”…..

I can feel the chaos inside me swirling and mixing, but, trying to come together, but, nothing is ready to leak out into my awareness, so, we’ll go with someone else’s work…. Let’s see who we can find today to soothe my savage breast….. Okay, yes, that refers to music…. but, it works the same way…. try to stay focused, ffolkes, and enjoy….

Witch Burning

In the marketplace they are piling the dry sticks.
A thicket of shadows is a poor coat. I inhabit
The wax image of myself, a doll’s body.
Sickness begins here: I am the dartboard for witches.
Only the devil can eat the devil out.
In the month of red leaves I climb to a bed of fire.

It is easy to blame the dark: the mouth of a door,
The cellar’s belly. They’ve blown my sparkler out.
A black-sharded lady keeps me in parrot cage.
What large eyes the dead have!
I am intimate with a hairy spirit.
Smoke wheels from the beak of this empty jar.

If I am a little one, I can do no harm.
If I don’t move about, I’ll knock nothing over. So I said,
Sitting under a potlid, tiny and inert as a rice grain.
They are turning the burners up, ring after ring.
We are full of starch, my small white fellows. We grow.
It hurts at first. The red tongues will teach the truth.

Mother of beetles, only unclench your hand:
I’ll fly through the candle’s mouth like a singeless moth.
Give me back my shape. I am ready to construe the days
I coupled with dust in the shadow of a stone.
My ankles brighten. Brightness ascends my thighs.
I am lost, I am lost, in the robes of all this light.

~~ Sylvia Plath ~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I know it will cause a lot of disappointment, but, I won’t be ranting today…. Since arising, I’ve managed to put together what you see for today’s post, in hopes of some angst showing up to provide the fuel to drive such an outburst, but, I’ve come to realize I’m waiting in vain. Nothing is going to come together in my head well enough today to make the effort worthwhile; any rant I attempt is destined to resemble a whine more than a rant, and I don’t want to get in the habit of settling for less than my best…..

What this means for y’all is another old-school pearl, of course….. I’ll set the parameters to look for quotes and/or aphorisms that will serve the same purpose as a rant, either about the BRC, the SCM, the DD’s (Dogma Dogs…. you know, preachers & priests….), or some other category of Asininny…. Poking fun at public icons is, patently, our favorite pastime here at ECR, with Smart Bee leading the way in that respect, so, this shouldn’t take too long…..

“A government that fears it’s people is a government that should be feared.” — Smart Bee

“Where large sums of money are concerned, it is advisable to trust nobody.” — Agatha Christie

“They gave me a book of checks. They didn’t ask for any deposits.” — Congressman Joe Early (D-Mass) at a press conference — to answer questions about the House Bank Scandal

“Machiavel says virtue and riches seldom settle on one man.” — Robert Burton (1577-1640) — The Anatomy of Melancholy, Part ii, Sect. 2, Memb. 2

“…when all government… in little as in great things, shall be drawn to Washington as the centre of all power, it will render powerless the checks provided of one government on another and will become as venal and oppressive as the government from which we separated.” — Thomas Jefferson, 1821

“That men do not learn very much from the lessons of history is the most important of all the lessons of history.” — Aldous Huxley (1894-1963), Collected Essays

“Once you can accept the universe as being something expanding into an infinite nothing which is something, wearing stripes with plaid is easy.” — Albert Einstein (1879-1955)

Okay, so it took forfuckingever…. which is, as it turns out, just as well, since it came out so well…. It isn’t often I can find such a perfect closing line as Albert’s, especially as it applies to our beloved leaders, and the show they put on…. I only wish I could say the show is for OUR benefit….

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

All things considered, this didn’t come out too badly…. As a result, it’s actually done, and I can go on to try to mitigate what physical ailments are currently making their play for attention….. Since pain is only peripherally involved so far, it should be a fairly simple thing to figure out…. assuming, of course, I can whip my brain into submission…. I’ll let y’all know tomorrow how that went…. See ya, ffolkes…..

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid the dubious

He’s big… I don’t know if I can take the mime…..

Posted on April 1, 2014 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

‘Tis April Fool’s Day, ffolkes, which is why I am NOT going to apologize for the title of today’s Pearl…. In fact, I’m feeling a bit of, perhaps, unwarranted pride in that one; it isn’t every day I think of such a fine piece of classical punning, much less get such a public opportunity to display it…. My only regret is that I can’t hear the groans and/or other sounds of sheer disgust that it may engender….

Now, some folks, even some ffolkes, might be upset to be given such grief over a mere pun, but, to us punsters, such reactions are a sheer delight,considered to be applause, as the proper reward for our efforts…. Hell, a good pun can actually make the audience nauseous, so the sounds of worshiping at the throne of Ralph are also considered to be music, to the ears of a true punster…. I’ve heard reports of an unexpected pun causing a nosebleed, but, I just assumed that was on the part of the punster, as a result of the punch in the nose by his, or her, ~~victim~~, er, audience…..

Now that I’ve come as close to an apology as I intend to come, we can head off into the wilds of Consensual Reality…. That is, we could, if I could find the damn keys to the gigoid-mobile. I had the darn thing waxed & polished up, and all the fold-down tables on the seat backs are new. We were also going to offer free WiFi on today’s flight, but, unless we find the keys, we won’t even be offering the daily tour…. Hang on, I think I remember where I set them down…..

YES! Here they are, right where I left them (Naturally…. did you ever notice that EVERY time we lose something, it’s always in the LAST place we think to look for it?….) (Well, of course it is…. DOH! Once it’s found, you don’t need to look for it anymore, whatever it is…. which makes it the LAST place, doesn’t it?….. Sometimes, I amaze myself with my own stupidity….) (Hah! Gotcha!…. It’s April Fool’s Day, and THAT was the SECOND, OR THIRD joke of the day…..)

Don’t worry, ffolkes, I’m almost done…..

What to do, what to do…. I’ve performed two or four obligatory jokes to honor the holiday we are celebrating today, & now find myself a trifle short of material…. Well, at least, short of the sort of material that might work here in the intro (I can put the pornography anywhere, and it will garner views, so I don’t use it here…. and, no, you can’t borrow it….). Maybe I should….. No, I promised I wouldn’t do that anymore….. Well, perhaps those old…. no, I looked at them a couple of days ago, and they won’t even sparkle any more, much less explode….. Hmm…. I know! We can break out the old, perfectly rounded, embarrassment-proof, left-over political dross left here by that candidate last November….. No, that’s out, too….. We took that stuff to the dump last month….

Oh well…. I suppose we don’t HAVE to make this any more of a standard intro than it already isn’t…. Nothing we have on hand is going to do much to make the price of the ticket worthwhile….. unless, of course, we can spot a herd of asininnies to torment. That always makes everybody feel like they’ve gotten their money’s worth….. which is a good thing, as we hate to have dissatisfied passengers on the Reality-busting gigoid-mobile, especially since we don’t actually charge any REAL money…. I always feel so, so GUILTY when someone isn’t happy with their ride; since it’s free, I kind of feel like I’ve let ffolkes down….

Now that I’ve typed up, let’s see…. SIX complete paragraphs, all chock full of time-and-taste tested April Fool’s Day material, none of which hits even a 2 on the sobriety scale….. I only wish I could say it’s even funnier than it appears to be, but, I’d just be fooling with you, so, I won’t say that…. I suppose NOW would be the best time to issue the warning….

On this particular day, one can NOT predict just exactly HOW MUCH, nor HOW LONG I may be affected by the events of the day, so it’s best to leave a lot of clear space around wherever I may be standing, sitting, or walking, as foolish, bozoid events can break out at the slightest provocation…. In other words, it can get a bit weird around here, so, please, don’t be offended by anything you see or hear today, and, please, wear the Kevlar vests provided by our insurance brokers…. Thanks….

On that note, we should proceed, before anyone starts to panic….. Shall we Pearl?…..

“Evolution–life’s a niche, and then you die.” — Smart Bee
_____________________________

Yesterday afternoon, I found the following articles, all on one subject in which I am VERY interested, all of which, taken together, prompted the outburst you see below…. It’s not as fresh as the day, but, yesterday’s not TOO far gone, so, I think it should be relatively crisp and savory…. It’s all, once again, perfectly true in all its assertions, as evidenced by the information provided in two of the links, which lead to the report mentioned in the first post, complete with justifying data…. Let’s dive in, shall we?….

ETHNOLOGY, n. “The science that treats of the various tribes of Man, as robbers, thieves, swindlers, dunces, lunatics, idiots and ethnologists.” –Ambrose Bierce, “The Devil’s Dictionary”

Or, in this case, climatologists, and those who love them least….

I have used this little entry from the Devil’s lexicon merely to highlight two factors as part of our discussion…. The first factor is to lay claim, as our statistical universe, to both the perpetrators, and the victims who are affected by the issue of climate change; in fact, with this factor, we make the obviously valid assumption that, in respect to pollution and climate change, all the various tribes of Man are both victim and perpetrator, in one…. The second factor I wish y’all to remember is a reminder, of the practical mistake in using science as the sole arbiter of any discussion, much less those concerning issues that can lead to one’s personal annihilation, aka, the final end results of man-made, unchecked changes to the climate of our planet….

With that dubiously high-falutin’ paragraph of intent behind us, allow me now depress you…. a lot….. (Fear not, it’s only for a while, and we’ll try to keep it light and humorous, as far as we can with such issues….)

The first link leads to an article from the NY Times, concerning one of the latest reports on climate change, this one issued by an Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change, comprised of a significant number of highly respected scientific experts from many different countries, with advanced degrees, and established reputations, in a number of relevant disciplines….

The next link is a short summary of the report in a PDF document format; the third is a link to the actual report, on the website of the panel who compiled it…. The last link included is a summary of the entire report, compiled by a reporter from a UK news outlet, put together for their readers, explaining many of the details of the report…. as well as including remarks from a scientist who takes a differing viewpoint….

I will comment on a number of ideas presented in the articles, hopefully AFTER you have read them…. but, if you want to skip most of the actual reading, that’s cool, the last part will stand alone, as long as you’re aware of the general area under examination….You’ll also be able to appreciate more whatever attempts at humor there may be if you do…. See you on the other side of the links…..

http://www.nytimes.com/2014/04/01/science/earth/climate.html?_r=0

http://ipcc.ch/pdf/ar5/pr_wg2/140330_pr_wgII_spm_en.pdf

https://www.ipcc.ch/report/ar5/wg1/

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-2593198/Climate-change-lead-war-famine-extreme-weather-claims-IPCC-report.html
Pictured above is the handsome, eminent Dr. Richard Tol, a scientist connected to the University of Sussex in the UK, a self-identified climatologist, (What? You’ve never heard of him? Gosh….. Nor have I….), who, with a smug, smarmy expression, stated unequivocally that all the scientists who wrote the report just a paranoid lot, a gaggle of Chicken Littles….

Well, okay, he actually just said he thought the report was an over-reaction, because HIS OWN calculations show there is much less to worry about than these worrisome ninnies are bleating about all over the news…. (Okay, he didn’t say “worrisome ninnies” or “bleating” either…. Sheesh, try to be a little dramatic, and what do I get?…. Nothing but grief….), as he stood, in an unknown location, blinking bemusedly at the reporter, obviously trying to glean as much air-time as he could possibly garner, by coming out with such a preposterously silly-ass view….

I’m sorry…. I have to say, by all appearances, this guy sure seems to have not the slightest clue as to how to get other folks believe him when he voices such , er, well nonsense?, Eh….? You’d think, if he was going to argue AGAINST all the “better known, more prestigious” scientists in the group of climatologists on the Intergovernmental Panel, ~~who were picked over him for the project~~ , er, who drew up the report, he would have at least arranged for a photo that didn’t make him look like he forgot to take his medications for the last few days…. or, alternately, that he not only knows what a hair dresser is, but, has been to see one in the past year….. Either one might just have helped his credibility factor a tad, don’t y’think? Nice tie, though….. once one gets past his expression and hair, which looks as he he set off a small explosion in it before breakfast….

But, then, humans, as a result of the bozoid features of their nature, will deliberately, and foolishly, speak out against just about anything at all, just to make noise…. I mean, look at the political world…. Well, no, wait…. Never mind, let’s don’t…. I’m not sure my stomach lining would remain intact after picturing the sheer amount of stupidity necessary, for all the pundits on the political front, to deny what is slapping THEM in the face, literally as well as figuratively….. There is, positively, (yes, you read it correctly… I said positively, NOT possibly…. positively….), no greater number, all in one select group, of sheer, ignorant fools, anywhere at all , than are currently taking up space in the Republican, and Democratic, Parties of the US Congress….

I’m talking about the sort of complete and utter idiots who continue to maintain their standing as naysayers on this issue, claiming to question both the fact of climate change, and the idea that it is caused by mankind…. They’re usually the same idiots who regard Evolution as an unproved theory, clutching their faith-based misconception of dogma tightly to their ears, as protection against hearing the definitive, obvious proof of its invalidity, rather than accepting its true status, as the FACT the rest of the scientific community regards it to be….. That much DELIBERATE stupidity, in one place, beggars the imagination, not to mention the danger it represents to the mind, and spirit, of anyone trying to calculate what are apparently negative IQ numbers….

I swear, last time I sat down to do the math on that ( That is, by calculating the # of Senators who disbelieve in climate change, and/or evolution, divided by the IQ points indicated by being able to formulate that denial, expressed as a negative number, where necessary….), I was not just appalled, I was stunned into stupefaction myself, ending up feeling the NEED to eat chocolate, just as if I’d been face-sucked by a Dementor….

If the figures are correct, it lowers the average IQ of a US Senator down into the 55-70 range, with 100 as the average human’s intelligence quotient. When I tried to perform the same set of calculations for the House of Representatives, the computer laughed at me, refusing outright to even consider having anything to do with requiring it to express a number so minuscule….

I’m depressed now. Are you depressed? I am…. I think I said that….

Oh well, who cares? None of any of this will matter in 500 years, because, by then, IF there are ANY humans still alive, they will be those who, in the last moments before succumbing to death by suffocation, were able to, somehow, flee this planet, to establish a colony somewhere else in space, overcoming all the necessary scientific and technological obstacles to survival that will ensue, to, perhaps, be able to cling to a precarious existence, on Mars, or the Moon, or one of the moons of Jupiter or Saturn….

Or, maybe, the Asteroids…. which are, in truth, the simplest way to live in space, if necessary….

Those bodies, millions upon millions of pieces of rock and ice, which orbit the Sun between Mars and Saturn, are what appears to be left over from another planet, apparently destroyed a couple billion years in the Solar System’s past… All those left-over planetary pieces are chock-full of all kinds of raw materials, most likely including water, and the raw materials needed to grow food, as well as to build our machines to travel and live in space, thus sustaining any remnants of civilization we may be able to save…. if any at all…. Power, of course, would be available in the form of both sunlight, and the presence of a gravity well in the system at large, as well as in the almost unlimited materials present in the asteroids themselves….

After the aforementioned passage of the next 500 years, given the parameters of this, and other, reports on the subject, it is for sure and for certain, almost a foregone conclusion, NONE of us humans will be left alive on THIS planet, because it will no longer be capable of supporting our form of life….. By that time, it will exist as a new planet, empty of life as we know it, one with a non-oxygen based formula in the atmosphere, fatally toxic to us, and to every other form of mammalian, reptilian, amphibious, land, or solely water-dwelling, avian, and possibly, insectoid life that now exists here….

Who knows if bacteria, virae, lichens, fungi, and molds will survive?…. We’ve found some of them on space rocks, and on spacecraft returning to Earth, so, they’re pretty tough, it seems…. But, the rest of us? Unless, as I said above, we manage to emigrate at least a few of us to another place, we’re history, count on it….

Believe it, ffolkes, because THIS is the most likely scenario, of all the ones I’ve looked at in the last 50 years of watching this “sad tale of never-ending woe and struggle”….

I’m gonna go find something more fun to do, to drive off this depression…..

“Hold the MAYO & pass the COSMIC AWARENESS…” — Zippy the Pinhead

O’Neill: “Tell you what, let me put it nicely. Get me the hell outta here!” — from Stargate
_____________________________

Here is a poem from Lewis Carroll…. I’m hoping I won’t need to explain the reason it fits in with today’s theme, other than to say, when reading this, allow free rein to your sense of metaphor…. (Hint: Little Birds = denizens of human society….)…. Enjoy!…..

Little Birds

Little Birds are dining
Warily and well,
Hid in mossy cell:
Hid, I say, by waiters
Gorgeous in their gaiters –
I’ve a Tale to tell.

Little Birds are feeding
Justices with jam,
Rich in frizzled ham:
Rich, I say, in oysters
Haunting shady cloisters –
That is what I am.

Little Birds are teaching
Tigresses to smile,
Innocent of guile:
Smile, I say, not smirkle –
Mouth a semicircle,
That’s the proper style!

Little Birds are sleeping
All among the pins,
Where the loser wins:
Where, I say, he sneezes
When and how he pleases –
So the Tale begins.

Little Birds are writing
Interesting books,
To be read by cooks:
Read, I say, not roasted –
Letterpress, when toasted,
Loses its good looks.

Little Birds are playing
Bagpipes on the shore,
Where the tourists snore:
“Thanks!” they cry. “‘Tis thrilling!
Take, oh take this shilling!
Let us have no more!”

Little Birds are bathing
Crocodiles in cream,
Like a happy dream:
Like, but not so lasting –
Crocodiles, when fasting,
Are not all they seem!

Little Birds are choking
Baronets with bun,
Taught to fire a gun:
Taught, I say, to splinter
Salmon in the winter –
Merely for the fun.

Little Birds are hiding
Crimes in carpet-bags,
Blessed by happy stags:
Blessed, I say, though beaten –
Since our friends are eaten
When the memory flags.

Little Birds are tasting
Gratitude and gold,
Pale with sudden cold:
Pale, I say, and wrinkled –
When the bells have tinkled,
And the Tale is told.

~~ Lewis Carroll ~~

_____________________________

Aye, the Tale is told, and told well…. I do enjoy a good metaphor, don’t y’all? We’ve made it as far as the last section, without any major mishaps, or any sort of diversionary actions that smack of Murphy’s tender touch…. for which, we are eternally grateful. In the perhaps futile hope of continuing this run of sheer luck, we’ll proceed to dive, to see if there are enough pearls available to fulfill our goal for the day…..

Parameters, today, are unnecessary….. serendipity is at loose in the world on days such as today, so we’ll trust in that to provide us with what we seek…. knowing that what we find will be worth the search…. If not, well, I can always comfort myself with the old saw about the journey being more important than the destination….. Abondanza!…..

How he lies in his rights of a man!
Death has done all death can.
And absorbed in the new life he leads,
He recks not, he heeds
Nor his wrong nor my vengeance; both strike
On his senses alike,
And are lost in the solemn and strange
Surprise of the change.

— Robert Browning (1812-1890) — After

“If you stand straight, do not fear a crooked shadow.” — Chinese Proverb

“The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time.” — Bertrand Russell

“A little folly is desirable in him that will not be guilty of stupidity.” — Michael de Montaigne (1533-1592) — Book iii, Chap. ix

“I am, therefore I am.” — Akira

“It is ridiculous to lay the blame of our wrong actions upon external causes, rather than on the facility with which we ourselves are caught by such causes.” — Aristotle

And in your dreams you can see yourself
As a prophet saving the world
The words from your lips
I just can’t believe you are such
A fool.

— Frank Zappa, “Oh No”.

Wow…. Serendipity, indeed….
_____________________________

Well, Stanley, this is ANOTHER fine mess you’ve gotten me into…. It is, however, done, and, if I say so myself, it’s done reasonably well….. Of course, one must keep in mind what day it is, too…. On that scary note, I’ll see y’all tomorrow…. Okay, sorry, can’t help it…. I suppose it’s not as scary, as it is resigned…. Okay, now I’m done…. probably finished as well, but, only time will tell on that one…. See ya…. for real this time….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid the dubious

How to train predator birds with vertigo….

Posted on March 31, 2014 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

A word is dead
When it is said
Some say.
I say it just
Begins to live
That day.

~~ Emily Dickinson ~~

Was Emily channeling the future with this poem? With the correct tilt to the head, with a slight look around the corner of the eye, this ~~would be~~ IS a very good statement to support the concept of blogging…. Each of us bloggers MUST abide by this feeling, in order to continue to post….

Well, I do, anyway…. But, I’m an Emily fan, so maybe that has something to do with it….. We all tend to fall back on the words of our favorites when it comes to justifying our own existence, or, in this case, our own continued presence on the web….

Okay…. So, was that a bit more comfortable? I thought a bit of a different opening might be in order….. Not that I feel the old way wasn’t working, but, I’ve never been quite satisfied with that part of the Daily Pearl…. Breaking past the morning block that almost everyone’s mind suffers upon first awakening has become, if not easy, at least doable….. But, the fear of the blank white screen still hovers in the background, always ready to jump up, freeze my brain’s connection to my fingers, & generally put a complete halt to the morning’s process of writing….. Damned neuroses!….

In the last few months, I’ve managed to NOT feel the fear so consistently, by using a combination of trickery, cheer leading, and flat out lying to myself, which seems to be working fairly well…. we haven’t had a freeze-up in close to a year. But, it’s never been an easy process, and I’ve never felt fully engaged in how it gets done….

I’ve always felt that somewhere, deep inside the back reaches of my brain, there is a structure, a building of words, so to speak, that I will someday find, establishing a solidly constructed edifice here at the beginning of each Pearl, to mark the beginning of another fine piece of work….

That is probably just another of my fantasies, but, hey, it’s MY fantasy, so leave it alone, okay? We all need our illusions to keep us going…. I know this; otherwise, why would we put up with so much fictional bullshit from our leaders? I’ve always known, and been saddened, by the knowledge that our leaders are liars; congenital, trained, or just naturally glib, it doesn’t matter, they’re all a bunch of self-serving assholes who would lie to their own mother if they thought it would buy her vote….

Oops! Ranting mode…. stand clear, please…. Okay, I turned it off, you can relax….. Almost started in on the BRC there…. I guess they just make too attractive a target to leave them alone too long…. I’ll not start that here in the intro today, though, for which I’m sure you are thankful….

I suppose, given we’ve managed to wander through a number of paragraphs already, we could conceivably call this completed, and get on with the day’s business…. Since I’ve had eight sold hours of sleep, and my pain meds are currently ahead of the pain, score-wise, I think I’ll go ahead and do that…. I suppose there are worse ways to start the day….

In fact, I KNOW there are, as I’m familiar with just about ALL of the different ways one can start badly….

Shall we Pearl?….

How good is man’s life, the mere living! how fit to employ
All the heart and the soul and the senses forever in joy!

— Robert Browning (1812-1890) — Saul, ix

_____________________________

As iterated above, ranting is on hold…. Since it is, and I want to keep going, we’ll put today’s old-school pearl here…. It will give me something easy to do, and pass the time until I am ready to go find something in the news upon which to focus my vitriol…. a waste bin, as it were, for the angst I wish to throw away…. For now, let’s find a group of pearls that says something about Life At Large….

“You may be sure that when a man begins to call himself a realist, he is preparing to do something he is secretly ashamed of doing.” — Sydney Harris

(Side note: When applied to politicians, the accuracy of this statement approaches 101% validity. — gigoid….)

“They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety.” — Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790) –Historical Review of Pennsylvania, 1759

“Wisdom outweighs any wealth.” — Sophocles (406 BC)

“I never resist temptation, because I have found that things that are bad for me do not tempt me.” — George Bernard Shaw, “The Apple Cart” (1929), Act II

“You may be disappointed if you fail, but you are doomed if you don’t try.” — Beverly Sills

“In morals, what begins in fear usually ends in wickedness; in religion, what begins in fear usually ends in fanaticism. Fear, either as a principle or a motive, is the beginning of all evil.” — Mrs. Jameson

“Why does there have to be an end to the rainbow? Can’t we just let beauty exist without trying to prove that it dies?” — Spite, The University of Akron

PERFECT! Q.E.D., mon amis….
_____________________________

Here is one of my favorite poems; it’s been here before, and, no doubt, will be here again…. This time, it has the name of the translator, who does an excellent job of creating a compelling English equivalent from the ancient Chinese verses….Enjoy!….

Drinking Alone

I take my wine jug out among the flowers
to drink alone, without friends.

I raise my cup to entice the moon.
That, and my shadow, makes us three.

But the moon doesn’t drink,
and my shadow silently follows.

I will travel with moon and shadow,
happy to the end of spring.

When I sing, the moon dances.
When I dance, my shadow dances, too.

We share life’s joys when sober.
Drunk, each goes a separate way.

Constant friends, although we wander,
we’ll meet again in the Milky Way.

~~ Li T’ai-po ~~

tr. Hamil

_____________________________

“When I see a bird that walks like a duck and swims like a duck and quacks like a duck, I call that bird a duck.” — Richard Cardinal Cushing

“If you call a dog’s tail a leg, what do you have? A dog. Calling a tail a leg, doesn’t make it a leg.” — Abraham Lincoln

Aren’t these complementary pearls great? They’re the perfect lead-in for a rant about politicians, most of whom are of the type of person (I use the word liberally….) who regularly attempts to convince the public they are NOT a duck, or a dog, when, in truth, they either quack, or bark, quite clearly…..

The subject of politicians lying to the public is one I spend a lot of time writing about here, so it would fit right in with all of my other rants very well…. Unfortunately, the news is currently being usurped with a story that makes it far to EASY to show how wide-spread the issue is in our government….

Leland Yee, a California State Senator from San Francisco, and Raymond “Shrimp Boy” Chow, a Tong leader from SF’s Chinatown district, (Kinda makes ya wonder, don’t it? “Shrimp Boy?”….. Personally, I get all SORTS of weird mental images popping up when I say those two words to myself….), have been arrested, and are being charged with a number of counts related to their (alleged….. 🙂 …) long-term involvement in drugs, gun-running, political corruption via voting, murder-for-hire, and just about every crime against society that exists, save for, perhaps, stealing from babies….. and that one isn’t out of the question for these two…. I just didn’t see that among the charges for which they were indicted….

It seems that for over twenty years, Yee was selling votes and political influence to Chow, and others, for lucrative economic advantage, for him, and for those who benefited from the programs he voted in to being. He also laundered millions of dollars of ill-gotten gains, by using his political campaign accounts to accept donations, for the Chinese Tong, run by Chow….

This money was collected from prostitution, drug, and racketeering enterprises, all run by the Tong. An undercover FBI agent infiltrated the Tong organization, establishing trust by posing as an ex-Mafioso of high repute, whereby he was able to gather tons of condemning evidence of their corruption, for over four years before the arrests were made…

But, it’s all too easy a target…. In fact, the focus being placed on these two will, long-term, have the opposite effect that it should….. These two clearly criminal individuals are providing too obvious a target for the public’s ire, thus taking it AWAY from all the other, less obviously corrupt politicians out there, almost ALL of whom are hard at work raiding the public treasury, but are much better at hiding their machinations than these two clowns appear to be…

Putting all the public’s attention on a couple of bozoids, who managed to get caught, literally red-handed, with their fingers in the public till, will ultimately have the effect of making other politicians appear to be more honest than they actually are…. That’s human nature, and the pundits, who all know this, will be using it to their advantage for a long time to come….

So, rather than waste a lot of my time and angst-driven energy on ranting about the corruption they are exposing, I’ll just remind you that what you are seeing is NOT atypical for politicians, and shouldn’t be thought of as an anomaly, but, rather, as an omen of things to come, when we expose ALL their asses, and throw them ALL out of office, and out of our lives…. (Picture an iceberg, 90% unseen, floating on the ocean…. Yee & Chow are a small part of the ice visible above the water line….)

Then, when I know you’ve realized that, in spite of all the nonsense in the news, detailing the shenanigans of what they’d like us to believe are swans swimming in the public pond, you now see they are really only ducks, stealing food from the swans, and the dogs, to wit: from you and me… Once you’ve realized how the politicians of this government are NOT in the business of helping us, but are only in Washington to steal as much as they can during their term of office, is the absolute truth, with a capital T, we can go on…..

Now, since y’all have put up with my blathering for so long on such an obvious issue, I’ll reward your forbearance by throwing together a set of pearls to further illustrate and/or enhance my points, to close this off with a flourish…. which, though not particularly common here, is, no doubt, warmly welcome when it occurs…. Enjoy!…..

“The seeds of our own punishment are sown at the same time we commit sin.” — Hesiod

(Sin, otherwise defined as voting…. the two words are interchangeable when politics are involved….)

“Intolerance of ambiguity is the mark of an authoritarian personality.” — Theodor W. Adorno

Gerald Ford: In the Bob Hope Golf Classic, the participation of President Gerald Ford was more than enough to remind you that the nuclear button was at one stage at the disposal of a man who might have either pressed it by mistake or else pressed it deliberately in order to obtain room service.” — Clive James

“If they become politicians they were switched at birth.” — Mom’s Hint #096

“A kitchen in every pot. I mean, a pot in every — I mean, a chicken in every…” — George Bush, 1988

“All a man needs to be elected President is the kind of profile that looks good on a postage stamp.” — B.B. Franklin

“We can’t be so fixated on our desire to preserve the rights of ordinary Americans…” — President William Jefferson Clinton, USA TODAY 11 Mar 1993

“As Athenodorus was taking his leave of Caesar, “Remember,” said he, “Caesar, whenever you are angry, to say or do nothing before you have repeated the four-and-twenty letters to yourself.” — Plutarch (46-120 AD) — Caesar Augustus

“Now I’m having INSIPID THOUGHTS about the beautiful, round wives of HOLLYWOOD MOVIE MOGULS encased in PLEXIGLASS CARS and being approached by SMALL BOYS selling FRUIT..” — Zippy the Pinhead

Damn, that was close…. I thought for sure I’d NEVER get out of there!…. Smart Bee took me at my word, and proceeded to inundate me with pearl after pearl that just fit into the group seamlessly…. I managed to keep it down to eight, then got lucky, and found the perfect Zippy quote for closing it off with just the right touch of nearly-coherent insanity…. “He was bigger than me, Ma, but, I took ‘im down!”….. Now we can all go get some rest….

You, you, and you, panic. The rest of you, come with me….
_____________________________

I suppose we will be forced at this point to declare a moral victory…. We only had to leave behind three bodies in a state of panic, but, the rest of us made it through to here, so, I have to count that on the positive side of the scale…. Otherwise, they’d close me down….

Besides, one of the three bozoids we left behind was a trained bozoid, so they’ll all eventually stop screaming & jumping around like idiots, whereupon the bozo will get hungry, and the others will follow as he goes off to find the exit door behind the nearest banyan tree….

On that phantasmagorical note, I’m outta here…. and, none too soon, I’m can tell…. See y’all tomorrow, ffolkes…..

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid the dubious

As dragons go, Smaug is a wuss…

Posted on March 30, 2014 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

If it weren’t for the previous twenty-five years, I’d give up trying to sleep altogether…. Those years, spent living, for the most part, without the boon of sleeping more than six or seven hours a day, on average, (if I was lucky), gave me plenty of reasons to try to find ways to increase the amount of time I spent horizontal, unconscious, in imitation of Morpheus….

Dwelling, as it were, upon the fields of Endymion, became an important task, if only to arm myself with more than the minimum of energy to deal with the demands upon your average middle-aged husband and father of two….. Sleep is a weapon, as you may know…. It helps dealing with the energy levels of the kids, when one doesn’t have to, almost literally, drag one’s sorry ass to the bathroom each morning before work…. Too late now…. However, I managed to make it through all of that, reasonably successfully, (in my own mind….), without the sleep…. But, I missed it….

As a consequence of this search, this last few months, experimenting with cannabis products to find the best ones to replace or augment my other pain medications, has had sort of a vacation-like quality to it, as I’ve found a couple of products that have enabled me to sleep better than I have since my twenties. The last couple of days, I’ve actually gotten spoiled, getting upwards of eight to ten hours of relatively uninterrupted sleep, awakening stronger than I’ve felt in many years…. Amazing what a bit of unadulterated rest will do, isn’t it?….

Once again, I see I’ve allowed myself to ramble through my own backyard, unashamedly sharing my patently boring personal intimacies, but, in the process, filling in a lot of empty space on the screen, all with reasonably good English…. If nothing else, I punctuate splendidly, and my grammar is a thing of beauty to behold, don’t you think? I do…. Of course, none of what has gone by has any relation to what we are supposed to be doing, which is finding an interesting way to pass time while y’all wend your way to your seats, to get safely strapped in for the day’s dive….

Oh….. It seems that while I was rambling around like that, that is exactly what happened…. I’ll be damned…. I’m not sure it has EVER gone quite so smoothly…. I’m not sure if I should be happy, or nervous, waiting for the other shoe to drop…. Oh, hell, I’m going to assume the best, for once, and get on with the show, before anything has a chance to go wonky….

By the way…. I forgot to tell y’all…. I found an old report, from back in February of 2012, when the doctors were finally able to pinpoint what’s wrong with me. At that time, I was diagnosed with “witzelsucht” (vit’sel-zoocht) [Ger.] , which is defined as, “A mental condition characteristic of frontal lobe lesions, marked by the making of odd jokes and painful puns, and the telling of pointless stories, at which the patient himself is intensely amused.” …..

Oh….. Well….That would explain it….

Shall we Pearl?…..

“Let us suffer any person to tell us his story morning and evening, but for one twelve-month, and he will become our master.” — Edmund Burke

Hmph…. a lot HE knows! I’ve been at this now for going on THREE twelve-months…. I don’t see anybody calling ME master!!!! Okay, I’ll stop now….
_____________________________

Beset by personal demons on every side, I’m retreating, at top speed, to a more stable vantage point…. Once I’ve gained my footing in a more trustworthy setting, I’ll be back to rant, or pearl, or do whatever I need to do to keep this on track…. For the nonce, hold your breath….. If I’m not back by the time you can count to oh, say, seven hundred eighty-three, then, go ahead and take another breath…. I shouldn’t be too long after that….

Better…. I found a nice little hill, with a commanding view of the surrounding terrain, and a nice, tall cliff at my back; very defensible, with a pool of water in a cave in the cliff, in case we come under siege…. Now I can afford to take the time to decide on a rant, or go dive for some pearls…. In fact, I’m going to do that, without telling you first which one it will be…. You’ll just have to figure it out on your own, when you see what comes next…. Hell, you could get lucky, and I’ll find some ART….

My god, it’s something new and different! What WILL he think of next?….. Enjoy…..
Okay, ffolkes…. the decision as to a rant or an old-school pearl has been taken out of my hands…. The above photo, the first portrait of all three of them released by the royal family since George’s christening, last October, is one of two potential pieces of news that would serve for this section’s espoused purpose….

The other choice is a story about California State Senator Leland Yee, and his partner in crime, Raymond “Shrimp Boy” Chow, a Chinese Triad Tong leader, both residents of SF’s Chinatown, who were recently arrested on charges of money-laundering, corruption, drug trafficking, and murder-for-hire…. As a long-time city and state politician, Lee makes an excellent target for a rant, as a very obvious member of the BRC caught with his hands in the till….

Political corruption for a rant, or some nice, bland little rant about the uselessness of royalty in the modern age?…. But, I don’t know….. with a Grand Doofus Face like Prince William’s, how can I pick on them, royal twits that they are?… It’s not honorable, nor is it cricket, to pick on the handicapped…. Besides, it’s a cute kid, and he’s got a tough life ahead…. Politician Lee and Tong Leader Chow are too obvious a target for my taste…. Such a rant would be like taking candy from a baby…. So, we’ll go with an old-school pearl, and keep the parameters loose, so there isn’t any real damage to anyone, other than, perhaps, to their sense of fair play…. Let’s dive!….

“In adversity remember to keep an even mind.” — Horace (8 BC)

“Keep the juices going by jangling around gently as you move.” — Satchel Paige

“One of the greatest victories you can gain over someone is to beat him at politeness.” — Josh Billings

“To know what is right and not to do it is the worst cowardice.” — Confucius

“Fear is the lock, and laughter, the key to your heart.” — Steven Stills

“Drinking when we are not thirsty and making love all year round, madam; that is all there is to distinguish us from other animals.” — Pierre-Augustin Caron de Beaumarchais, The Marriage of Figaro

A monk asked Nansen, “Is there any great spiritual teaching that has not been preached to the people?”
Nansen said, “There is.”
“What is the truth that has not been taught?”
“Nothing,” Nansen replied.

— Smart Bee
_____________________________

It’s now just barely 4 ack emma, so decision making is probably not an advisable pastime for someone such as myself, who makes an unfortunate habit of being up at this hour…. It’s probably not advisable, even though I’m careful about making decisions more critical than which subject matter to choose, regardless of the potential for nonsense…. I’ve haven’t lived to this ripe age without a certain degree of intelligence making itself felt; I’m actually getting pretty good at thinking ahead. Sometimes, though, the process of making ANY decision becomes a chore, an ordeal of note, otherwise known as a pain in the proverbial ass….

Such is the decision as to the poem for today…. I can’t seem to pin down any particular mood, or feeling, which might give me a clue about which author to pick…. I just used Emily yesterday, twice, so, I don’t feel right about going to that well again…. Oh, hell, I’m not in the mood to waffle about it any more, so I’ll just pick one of mine, and be done with it…. I’ll look for one that isn’t TOO depressing, just as a minor parameter by which to choose…..

Relative Cynicism, with Caramel Sauce

Absolute stillness follows violent movement,
it can happen during a downhill race,
as an immovable piece of asphalt pavement
meets the once handsome racer’s face.

Yuk, yuk, yuk said that asshole Moe,
after poking both of Larry’s eyes,
bashing face, head, & crotch of Curly Joe
and only ever got hit with pies.

Lonely moments never really come along
when Murphy’s got us in his sights.
Not for money, love, or siren’s song
will he abrogate his natural rights.

All we can do is sigh, or laugh in pain,
as Life portions out our ration of shit.
Silver linings melt in the slightest rain,
so we may as well learn to live with it.

~~ gigoid ~~

_____________________________

“For several years more I maintained public relations with the Almighty. But privately, I ceased to associate with him.” — Jean-Paul Sartre

I can relate…. This sentiment seems to me to be one that might be common, to any of us who have refused to fall into the delusional system that is so prevalent in our society, the one they call religion…. or, in deference to accuracy, in my estimation, the cult of deliberate ignorance…. For well over 10,000 years, since before the advent of writing, people have been trying to foist the idea of supernatural origins for all we see in reality upon the rest of humanity, as a means of justifying their own particular penchant for manipulation of others, their avarice, and their gratuitous, insane notions of piety….

I suppose, if they didn’t work so hard to make other people go along with their insanity, it wouldn’t piss me off so much….. I understand they are just trying to figure out in their own minds how to deal with their own fears, and their unwillingness to use what brains they have to take care of themselves, to take responsibility for their life, and their actions…. These cowardly fools would rather place their ignorant faith in a supernatural entity, for which there is no convincing evidence in reality…. God has always made an excellent scapegoat, though, which is why He is so popular among the cowardly….

It has always been somewhat irksome to me, ever since I was a child, to have people expect me to fall right in with this nonsense…. Even at the tender age of four, I knew there were flaws in the story I was getting… There were too many internal inconsistencies in the logic, which caused my already logical mind to question what I was hearing, even then….

There were too many flags coming up from my internal crap detector, which tended to go off like crazy, every time I went to Sunday School…. and this was in the Presbyterian Church, which is about as bland and flexible a creed as exists among the myriad of Biblical interpretations that are floating around out there in the world at large…. Plus, I just KNEW it had to be a big joke, or lie, or something, when they tried to convince me of the “rightness” of “everything” I was reading in the Bible…. For example, that women were less important than men, especially in the church, as exemplified in the following short discussion….

“In the early twelfth century century the Virgin had been the supreme protectress of civilisation. She had taught a race of tough and ruthless barbarians the virtues of tenderness and compassion. The great cathedrals of the Middle Ages were her dwelling places upon earth. In the Renaissance, while remaining the Queen of Heaven, she became also the human mother in whom everyone could recognise qualities of warmth and love and approachability… The stabilising, comprehensive religions of the world, the religions which penetrate to every part of a man’s being– in Egypt, India or China– gave the female principle of creation at least as much importance as the male, and wouldn’t have taken seriously a philosophy that failed to include them both… It’s a curious fact that the all-male religions have produced no religious imagery– in most cases have positively forbidden it. The great religious art of the world is deeply involved with the female principle.” — Kenneth Clark, 1969

Let’s not even get into the other crap they were trying to get me to buy…. original sin, the holy ghost, blasphemy, worshiping graven images, etc.,…. it’s all even more outrageously manipulative, and unbelievable than believing women are inferior to men, by design (which is, obviously, not true….). Also annoying is the way this philosophy, Christianity, is touted as oh-so-wonderfully inclusive, oh-so-compassionate, and oh-so-generous in nature…. all the while they are trying to convince everyone of these qualities, they are displaying their bigotry, ignorance, aggressiveness, and fear of aliens of all kinds….

These people, the white Christians, have been shown to be ultimately responsible for most of the wars we’ve seen over the centuries, as well as having the responsibility for having kept the general populace under the control of the savage master ruling classes, those humans with no compassion at all, assisting them blatantly with their constant admonitions to obey worldly authority, on the promise of immortality…. AFTER THEY DIE….

Can you think of ANYTHING more stupid? To buy into the notion that our actions on this plane of existence have some kind of regulatory effect on where we might go when we die, is the most egregiously distorted view of reality I can imagine, one with absolutely NO proof, or even evidence that can be even pointed at, much less held in the hand….

Well, ffolkes, I just can’t bring myself to do it. I won’t refuse responsibility for my own actions, and adjust my behavior to fit some other asshole’s idea of what is right, just on the promise of a reward when I die…. It doesn’t make any sense, and I’m not going to do it, so there….

To finish out this indictment, of religion in general, and of Christianity in specific case, here are five pearls that show exactly what is important in modern society, all to maintain the status quo….

“Irresponsibility isn’t a sickness–it’s an art.” — Remington Steele

“If words were invented to conceal thought, I think that newspapers are a great improvement on a bad invention.” — Thoreau

“Prejudice is when you don’t hate an individual, but you hate what they stand for, when without knowing them personally, you decide they are worthy of your derision.” — Callan Williams

“Most people would like to be delivered from temptation but would like it to keep in touch.” — Robert Orben

“Ignorance is Strength.” — George Orwell’s 1984

These statements, then, become the rallying cries of modern society, pointing out to people how to be successful in life, by encouraging everyone to avoid all blame, and all virtue….. And we wonder why we’re going to hell in a handbasket….

A fig for those by law protected,
Liberty’s a glorious feast;
‘Courts for cowards were erected,
Churches built to please the priest.

— Robert Burns (1759-1796)
_____________________________

This will someday be noted as an example of a “typical” Pearl from this era…. I can’t say at all how good it is, or even whether it is readable; that would be too egotistical, even for me. I will say this…. It’s done, and I’m glad, because I managed to create this one in spite of all the handicaps I’ve been encountering of late, most of which I’ve been strong enough to keep from mentioning (that’s scary, eh?….)…. Any who, as I said, and will now reiterate, it’s done…. So….. see ya…..

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid the dubious

gigoid

Ned Moore, aka gigoid, is a 70 year-old, (!!!… When did that happen?….), retired dilettante, who would rather read than eat, most days. His first blog, "gigoid’s folly", has been emailed out to folks he knows for about 18 years now. He still considers it his best defense against angst, and the ever-present specter of sheer insanity..... Due to rigorous curmudgeon training requirements, he has discontinued his Facebook presence, but still indulges in the occasional Twitter session... In essence, he's socialized, but, not overly sociable; all labels and stereotypes are forbidden in his presence... and he doesn't care what anyone thinks about that..... In fact, he doesn't want to talk anymore.... If you feel you MUST contact gigoid, his email address is: alphagigoid@gmail.com You can go read now.... Go on, beat it.... gigoid, the dubious

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