I’ll see your platitudes, & raise you a euphemism….

Ffolkes,

“Wisdom and good sense guard life from harm.” — Smart Bee

August 1 2014 026

    The aphorism above the picture of the owl is mostly true, in the sense that it is ages old wisdom, time-tested, part of the legacy of such ideas that are passed down from generation to generation, throughout all of our common history as humans…. I use the term “mostly true” because, in spite of the good things that happen when one pays attention to the truth (wisdom), and uses that to try to avoid mischance in life, (good sense), there are times when nothing will protect us from the hardships that life can dump on us without any warning…. All of us, no matter how stable, intelligent, and careful we are, step in a pile of crap we failed to note, now and again….

In a very real, and yet, foolish sense, the presence of the owl is an attempt by someone to acknowledge the truth of the aphorism, and to try to utilize the information…. but, in a different way, that fails to recognize their own part in maintaining a state of being where wisdom is useful, and welcome, and good sense is merely a matter of paying attention to what is real. In short, they hope, that by having the owl (a SYMBOL of wisdom, not the real thing….) outside their home, it will provide the shield that good sense would otherwise engender, thus making the home a sanctuary from reality’s demands….

Thinking is too hard, so, the owl is supposed to prevent the necessity from arising for these folks, a concept far too common for my taste, and, to my way of thinking, a big part of why things are so messed up in our world….. But, that’s a topic for another section, since this is only supposed to be a warm-up…. It does, as a matter of course, often grow out of that mold, but, I do try to keep it within reason…. Whether or not that actually happens is somewhat of a risky proposition, much of the time, so, I tend to take it the way it comes, then go with the flow….. whatever that means, or entails….

What it shouldn’t entail is a complete new beginning….. Somehow, since penning the above opening paragraphs, my brain dropped into hibernation, or some sort of frozen state that began to affect my typing….. I almost started to apologize for using a picture of my own, but, caught myself before I would have needed to resort to any sort of force. I’m thinking, though…. at this point, some sort of forceful tactic may be necessary, as there doesn’t seem to be a lot of movement in there yet, that I can see…. but, then what I expect to see when peering into my own frozen brain, I couldn’t say…

Perhaps I should try to….. Nah. Last time I tried that, I had to carry out three unconscious Gentle Readers myself, and almost ended up in bed for a week. Maybe we should…. nope. Better not. That one almost exploded, last time I broke it out. It seems just about ALL of our emergency intro-killing methodologies have either been over-used, or, as we used to say down at the rodeo, they’ve been rode hard, and put away wet, thereby making them all but useless for our purposes….

Shoot, that means we have to use #4 again, and I just got over the last time…. Oh well, such is life in the fast lane, I suppose…. Okay, stand back….

Shall we Pearl?…..

“There is much pleasure to be gained in useless knowledge.” — Bertrand Russell

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Albert Einstein was a late talker as a child. His parents were understandably worried. finally at the supper table one evening, He broke his silence to say, The soup is too hot. Greatly relieved, his parents asked why he never said a word before. Young Albert replied, “Because up to now everything was in order.” — From ‘The Little, Brown Book Of Anecdotes’ by Clifton Fadiman

http://www.rollingstone.com/politics/news/the-presidency-and-the-press-20140804?utm_source=regular&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=newsletter&email=alphagigoid@gmail.com

“Even before Obama and his new politics burst onto the scene in 2008, we knew we lived in a country that is evenly but drastically split in its worldview. Now that the opposition can rewrite the news as it’s happening, the two sides can essentially live in separate realities – which is perhaps what we’ve always wanted. It’s becoming clear, though, that two casualties of this new order are efficacious, fact-based governing and an independent, fact-based press.

Amid the barrage of criticism, as Obama strains to respond to every new crisis, the White House’s moves begin to look like guesses, or even shrugs. “When you don’t know what you can plan for,” Gibbs says, “then you’re watching and reacting. And in this town, if you’re just watching and reacting, it never ends well.”” — excerpted from the above article

Okay…. So, I bet, at this point in the post, you’re preparing yourself for a rant, which, I know you know, requires some rather extensive preparation in order to be able to fully appreciate all the nuances of the arguments presented…. You gotta be able to suspend belief in what is often held to be true, which can be frightening for some…. that’s why we offer the Valium before heading out…. Today, however, I’ve decided to forgo the usual diatribe, in favor of another old school pearl that will accomplish the same poking and prodding, but with less effort….

The above article was interesting, if a bit on the pollyanna-ish side…. but, then, what could be expected by someone who is a former presidential press secretary…. He does provide a rather cogent insider’s viewpoint of the issue of political coverage by the media, and in the process, manages to give a pretty clear picture of some of the issues and problems we have observed in the relationship between the media and the administration of all previous presidents…. It’s a situation that, as is pointed out here, has been deteriorating for many years, and is now at a point where neither side is able to trust the other….

That’s fine with me, as that way, we don’t have to pretend to believe any of it…. so, for now, let’s take some shots at the bozos who play in that particular game of bones….

“The extravagance of government rhetoric is inversely proportional to the seriousness of the act involved.” — Smart Bee

“It is only the ignorant who despise education.” — Publius Syrus (42 BC) — Maxim 571

“Politics is perhaps the only profession for which no preparation is thought necessary.” — Robert Louis Stevenson

“I don’t vote.  It just encourages them.” — A Maine woman

“If good intentions are combined with stupidity, it is impossible to outthink them.” — Marion J. Levy, Jr.

“No one loves the man whom he fears.” — Aristotle

“I got out of bed for *this*?” — Smart Bee

Perfect! Bracketed by SB, seven one-liners, all of which make a pointed criticism about those who engage in the disgusting practice of running for office, which, together, form an indictment, based on ample evidence of rampant cupidity….

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Once again, I’m subjecting y’all to another of my older poems, mainly because I don’t feel much like either searching out something worthwhile, or opening a vein to write a new one…. So be it, gigoid has spoken… Here’s one of the older ones, from October of 2012…..

Raging at Aging

As old as you feel, we are told, is old as you are,
custom assures such vision will carry us far.
Reality begs to differ, may it be so bold
it is really quite painful, and very, very cold.

The power and strength felt in our halcyon youth
desert us with age, yet another unwelcome truth.
Irony rules our time here on this bountiful earth
as we reflect the changes over time since our birth.

As physical powers fade from this fragile shell,
we learn our mind can serve us quite as well.
The strength that once filled our bones and hearts
is now applied by our will, to more arcane arts.

Life’s greatest gift is our freedom of choice
no matter how often we forget, we still get a voice.
Energy, or apathy, by our will we may choose,
failing to do so, our only way to lose.

Each of us lives in the grip of time and space,
always seeking our balance, our own chosen place.
One must accept reality, for it is true at the core,
all we can do, is all we can do, and nothing more.

~~ gigoid ~~

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“Know thyself”? If I knew myself, I’d run away.” — Goethe

Some might accuse me of a level of laziness beyond the boundaries of acceptability, of setting a poor example for others to emulate; to them, I can only say, “well, there you go.” Everyone’s entitled to their opinions, right? If it makes them feel better to point out what I consider to be one of my finest qualities, with the apparent intent of convincing me it is a flaw, well, they’re welcome to speak their minds. It’s a free country, and last time I checked, we still had free speech…. not private, but, free… Of course, they’d also be welcome to do it somewhere else, which I usually will insist upon, even going so far as to provide them with a parting boot to the ass, as a token of my respect and esteem…

Having thus disposed of such petty annoyances, I can proceed to the reason for any such derogatory judgments, which, as you’ve probably guessed by now, is yet another pearl from the archives…. This one won’t be a burden, so much, as, A) it isn’t a rant, or a discussion…. and, B) it’s original intent was to be fun, or funny, or, at minimum, a reasonable facsimile of either one…. I think it hits that nail a couple of good whacks, but, then, I’m not the best judge of that, I’m thinking…. I might be the laziest judge, but, not the best, from more than one standpoint, and, I’m sure, legal position….

Now that I’ve blathered sufficiently, here is what I found for section three today…. Please enjoy it, or, what the good of wading through such a healthy dose of my best nonsense?…..

From 10/1/2012:

Life can be a confusing time, especially for those unequipped for its sense of whimsy….. It can make us look foolish, a lot, and easily, but think of how amusing that is for other people, eh? There are small benefits hidden in the most egregious tasks, if undertaken cheerfully…. Today, I find myself out of ranting mode, and into Pearling mode…. Thus, I present for your amusement and edification, the following group of pearls, and though all are of the stand-alone variety, they can be, and have been, woven together into an monumental idea of great stature, one that could conceivably make great changes happen in the life of anyone who takes it to heart….

It could also be ignored completely, and your life will not suffer at all for its loss…. That’s the magic of true pearls of virtual wisdom…. They are only good for what you use them, and nothing else…. It’s not exactly an efficient process, but one that satisfies…. So, enjoy this short trip through logic, past deduction, around wild fantasy, and onward even further, into relative meaning, though, sadly, with bells and whistles absent their traditional positions of honor…..

“Even for a wizard there will often come times when someone close to you, perhaps even your spouse, criticizes your habits by comparing them to those of animals. This is distinctly unfair to the animals, who have far better habits than we in many areas. When, for example, have you seen a frog collecting taxes or a squirrel running for electoral office? Present arguments like these to those people who criticize you. If they still do not see the wisdom of your ways, you may then feel free to bite them.” — The Teachings of Ebenezum, Vol. IX

“The interval between the decay of the old and the formation and establishment of the new constitutes a period of transition which must always necessarily be one of uncertainty, confusion, error, and wild and fierce fanaticism.” — John C. Calhoun (Careful, this one is real, and should not be treated without due care and respect, just as you would with any stinging insect…..)

DUMBO- sucked into the engine of a 747. — The TRUE fates of your favorite Disney characters (Sad, but true…..)

“The universe has fascinated mankind for many, many years, dating back to the very earliest episodes of Star Trek, when the brave crew of the Enterprise set out, wearing pajamas, to explore the boundless voids of space, which turned out to be as densely populated as Queens, New York. Virtually every planet they found was inhabited, usually by evil beings with cheap costumes and Russian accents, so finally the brave crew of the Enterprise returned to Earth to gain weight and make movies.” — Dave Barry

Anything free is worth what you pay for it. — Smart Bee (Caution: this one is also real…. ignore at your peril…..)

Death is only a state of mind.  Only it doesn’t leave you much time to think about anything else. — Smart Bee

And finally, as the perfect finish to such an entropically enhanced pearl…..

“You were s’posed to laugh!” — Zippy the Pinhead

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“I don’t like talking to philosophers. I’m always worried that they might be laughing behind my back because they know I don’t exist.” — Smart Bee

I like being able to end the day’s work with a personal pearl; I like to smile, what can I say? This one is perfectly ME, as it makes me do what I do best, which is laugh at myself, and my pedantic, pathetic need to pretend I’m an intellectual, when what I really am is a hedonistic polymath with bozoid tendencies, and a large portion of chutzpah…. It works for me…. See y’all tomorrow, ffolkes….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest  Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….


Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid the dubious

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Scratch the Ultimate Itch….

Ffolkes,
Aggravating a full-grown leopard is probably an activity best left to female leopards, but if the big fella I was confronted with was any indication, I wouldn’t have to wait for his mate to get him going. Eye’s focused, ears back in fighting position, muscles bunched and ready to spring, he was an awesome example of his species. The screaming yowl that issued from his throat cut straight through to the fear center in my brain, which was doing some screaming of its own. Flight? Or fight? Both seemed likely to bring this to an unacceptable outcome; if I break and run, he’ll take me down from behind in three steps. If I stand and fight, I and my Swiss Army Knife were going to be slightly out gunned. A lot slightly…..there was only one thing to do. I started to sing, a slow, easy tune, while slowly moving from side to side in  gentle dance. As I did this, and the big cat watched warily, I reached back and pulled my iPod out of my pack. I selected the tune I wanted, hit the play button, and listened gladly to the sound of bagpipes at full volume. It had the effect I had hoped for; at the first blast of the pipes, the cat’s ears quivered, his eyes squinched up, and he immediately turned tail and disappeared into the vegetation. Another victory of reason over fear, and another victory chalked up for the pipes o’the lochs…..


Okay, so it’s not the greatest literature that ever came down the pike. I like it, and that is all that matters, mostly. I just felt like being silly this morning; don’t much feel like getting serious today. My life in MeatSpace is serious enough to fulfill all my needs in that respect; hence, this little bit of drivel from the fertile mind of a retired dilettante. I do like the new format for these Pearls; the constant need for new material is no longer a critical issue. It does, however, make it a bit more serious-minded, with a bit less opportunity for sarcasm and/or innuendo. But, for days such as this, when my spirit rejects somberness, the old format is still useful. The Pearls selected for today’s missive were collected with that in mind, and will hopefully lighten your day……

“One of the unpardonable sins, in the eyes of most people, is for a man to go about unlabeled. The world regards such a person as the police do an unmuzzled dog, not under proper control.” — T.H. Huxley, 1893
(That’s me, in a nutshell….)

“It’s awfully hard work doing nothing. However, I don’t mind hard work when there is no definite object of any kind.” — Oscar Wilde, The Importance of Being Earnest

“Albert Einstein was a late talker as a child. His parents were understandably worried. Finally at the supper table one evening, he broke his silence to say, “The soup is too hot”. Greatly relieved, his parents asked why he never said a word before. Young Albert replied, “Because up to now everything was in order.” — From ‘The Little, Brown Book Of Anecdotes’ by Clifton Fadiman

Know’st thou the land where the lemon-trees bloom,
Where the gold orange glows in the deep thicket’s gloom,
Where a wind ever soft from the blue heaven blows,
And the groves are of laurel and myrtle and rose?
— Goethe (1749-1832)
— Wilhelm Meister, Book iii, Chap. i

Don’t you just hate it when they verbify nouns?
(I know I certainly do….)

“If you get gloomy, just take an hour off and sit and think how much better this world is than hell. Of course, it won’t cheer you up if you expect to  go there.” — Don Marquis

And on that note, I will leave you the remains of the day….. y’all take care out there….


Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.
gigoid
Dozer

Kowabunga!