Today’s Pearl, as well as being one of the shortest in recent history, will be one of the speediest ever created, as I have some rather important business to attend to, out in the Big Blue Room, fairly early in the morning… In addition, this means the usual introductory nonsense has been proscribed for the day, as being totally inappropriate, both to our needs, and to our reputation…. such as it is…. This isn’t to say this intro will necessarily be any better, just shorter….

As a matter of fact, I can’t really think of anything important enough, or entertaining enough to say at this point that would put the above proscription at risk, so, I’m going to go with emergency method # 4….

Shall we Pearl?….

“Isn’t it interesting that the same people who laugh at science fiction listen to weather forecasts and economists?” — Kelvin Throop III
_____________________________

I came across the four rules listed below as I was cruising the SB database, and was immediately taken back in memory to the halcyon days of my youth, when I was at UC Berkeley, ostensibly as a university student, but, more accurately, as a paduan learner about life…. Part of my curriculum, in my role as such a paduan, was the study of the out of doors, and in particular, the aerodynamic properties of the Frisbee disc….

In my years at UCB, I became quite good at both throwing and catching the disc, spending a multitude of hours in the Sproul lower plaza on campus, where the large concrete area made the perfect venue for tricks, with the added bonus of an always changing, but often appreciative audience of undergrads to admire our form… Some of them were quite lovely, so, what was a young man to do but his best?….

My claim to fame as a disc artiste was the honor of being invited to go to the 1969 National Frisbee Championships, being held that year in Chicago at one of the schools there, as a member of the Berkeley team…. I declined the offer to join them, as I had other plans for that summer, 1970, which came  after my sophomore year, but, it was a great honor, one I have always treasured, and, in a small way, regret not having accepted….. I’m pretty sure the Berkeley team placed well in that year’s event, so, if I’d gone, my experiences would have been a powerful cultural experience, one that might have shaped the rest of my life differently than it did…. Who knows? In any case, it’s a fond memory from that time….

There is more to the act of throwing the disc than it appears, and the trick catches that are made obviously involve some rather advanced athleticism…. My own favorite, my signature catch, as it were, was one where, as the Frisbee flew at me on a level line, I would jump in the air, spin 360º, catching the disc in my hand, behind my back, as I spun, then landing lightly on my feet, continuing the spin, and tossing the disc back to the other player in one continuous move…. It’s hard to describe, but quite impressive to see…. In fact, when done correctly, I’ve been told it looks impossible to do…. A running catch, with a leap at the end to catch the disc between the legs, was another of my better tricks…..

Perhaps the trick that elicited the biggest number of “ooh”‘s, and “aah”‘s from the crowd was the one where the disc flew to the catcher and hovered slowly, coming down from higher than the head…. First, I would poke the center of the hovering disc, from underneath, causing it to rise straight up, still spinning…. When it came down, I would again poke it, this time with my foot, and make it go back up…. As it came down the 3rd time, I’d let it hit me on top of the head, with a little bump which caused it to again fly straight up a few feet…. Lastly, as it came down, slowly spinning, I’d catch it on the tip of my index finger, allowing it to spin there, balanced on the tip of my digit, until finally tossing it up, and snatching it in one hand, then bowing deeply, as the applause broke out….. If done right, the audiences loved it….

As a marketable skill, however, Frisbee throwing and catching left a lot to be desired, as there’s no real market for that particular set of athletic abilities…. The skills do, of course, train the body and mind to work well together, and that sort of training crosses over into one’s personal skill set, improving how other skill sets behave in the process….. Lessons learned by the body/mind in such cases can be applied almost seamlessly to other schemes…. But, nobody’s ever going to pay a lot for seeing anybody throw a disc….

Well, there you go, a reminiscence from gigoid’s past….. A bit sappy, perhaps, but, I’m fairly sure I avoided crossing over into maudlin…. I also hope nobody fell asleep (unless, of course, you needed it….), or fell out of their seats from boredom…. Just had to take a little trip down memory lane, and brought y’all along…. We’ll go on to bigger things now, more on a par with our usual fare…. I feel better, anyway….

Here, then, for your edification and entertainment, are the four basic rules of disc Frisbee, as compiled by some random dude named Roddick, back in the 60’s, or maybe the early 70’s…. Does it matter?….

1) The most powerful force in the world is that of a disc straining to land under a car, just out of reach (this force is technically termed “car suck”).

2) Never precede any maneuver by a comment more predictive than “Watch this!”

3) The probability of a Frisbee hitting something is directly proportional to the cost of hitting it.  For instance, a Frisbee will always head directly towards a policeman or a little old lady rather than the beat up Chevy.

4) Your best throw happens when no one is watching; when the cute girl you’ve been trying to impress is watching, the Frisbee will invariably bounce out of your hand or hit you in the head and knock you silly.

— The four constant Laws of Frisbee — Dan Roddick
_____________________________

I’m feeling a bit egotistical this morning, so here is another of my own poems…. If I recall correctly, this poem is the last one I did, back in 2013, before running into the current poetry dry spell I’m experiencing… I’m hoping that reading this will stimulate another one to bleed out…. If not, well, this will have to do for the nonce…. Just in case it’s not literal enough, it’s about Pearling….

Everybody wins today…. no rant on tap. I decided to go with the Frisbee piece instead…. That means, naturally, that I’ll use that as an excuse to create another old-school pearl, because, hey, that’s what I do… Here for your elucidation, as well as your edification, though never intended to be purely educational, is another in a long line of such missives, just because….

“If everyone believed in peace they would immediately begin fighting over the best way to achieve it.” — Goebel’s Observation on Utopia

“It is your concern when your neighbor’s wall is on fire.’ — Horace

“All’s fair in love and war – What a contemptible lie.” — Smart Bee, with gigoid’s full agreement

“I have never met a person who says, ‘I believe what I believe; these are just my values.’ There are always arguments. Nazis had them. Communists have them. Thieves and pimps have them. There may be some people who don’t feel they have to make a case for themselves, but they must be either tramps or philosophers.” — Allan Bloom, The Closing of the American Mind

Corruptissima republica plurimae leges. [The more corrupt the state, the more numerous the laws.] — Cornelius Tacitus, 56-120 A.D., Annals III 27 ***

“Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence.” — Carl Sagan

“Duty is heavier than a mountain, death lighter than a feather.” — Robert Jordan

Hmm…. a bit eclectic, but, not bad at all, at all….

*** (Side note: Having worked as a State of California employee for many years, I can tell y’all that a copy of the California Health and Welfare Code, and a copy of the State Criminal Code, were both kept in the offices of the people who worked in the mental healthcare field, as resources for the work we did at the state-run hospitals…. The H&W code is a stack of books, more than 12 feet high, each volume over 800 pages of tiny font…. The Criminal Code is a stack about two feet shorter, same size books and font…. That doesn’t mention anything about the OTHER state codes, and is an example of only ONE state’s laws in those areas…. No mention of the local, or Federal laws, which take up an entire library, and are being extended at every session of Congress….).
_____________________________

While this may or may not be the shortest Pearl I’ve ever done, I must confess that, other than a few re-blogs, it is most certainly the absolute quickest to be completed, ever…. I’ve been up for only an hour, and it is done…. some might even say it’s finished, but, we won’t mind them unless they start to become violent, and I made sure they got extra Valium in their tea…. In any case, as mentioned, it’s done, and I’m outta here…. See ya tomorrow, if the universes has no objections….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest  Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.