Ffolkes,

“It takes a very long time to become young.”

~~ Pablo Picasso ~~

Late spring at Sonoma Creek

Hajime…. Since the deadline for posting just went flying past my head, I suppose I’d best get started on today’s Pearl. Considering the fact virtually none of it is done, we’ll be lucky to see one today. Hope does exist, as I’ve begun, & don’t intend to stop until done. But, that could change, of course, well before getting there. Once again, the Metaphorse has stepped in, to apply the duality of nature to our undertakings, as is the Universe’s wont.Why we should wish the Universe to even HAVE a wont, I haven’t a clue, but, I suppose it really doesn’t matter for our purposes here today.

To our complete surprise, we find we have written a relatively normal first paragraph, (‘normal’ in that it is of a certain length, says nothing particularly worthwhile, and, is properly punctuated), we look up, to find ourselves deep in the second paragraph, still without any direction, or hint of a direction, in which to make our effort. It probably doesn’t matter anyway; what with the lack of anything resembling rational thought currently inhabiting my brain, there is little chance of finding anything we can use, without serious alteration, or padding, neither of which we are equipped to handle today. Damn! Y’all know what this means, don’t you? No. Well, if you don’t know, I probably shouldn’t say…

Having thus created the proper frame of stultified indignation, we can get this slow on the toad. What, you may ask, the hell does that mean? Well, if I knew, or cared, I might consider relaying that information. Since I don’t, and, I don’t, we’ll just use it as another fine excuse to go on, before this gets any stranger, and we start losing our audience…. like we ever had one. For all I know, nobody’s out there, and nobody will ever see this but me, and a couple die hards who come every day. But, whether anyone is there, or ever reads this, it still has to get done, or I melt down worse than usual…. So be it. Let’s do it….

Shall we pearl?….

“No law can be sacred to me but that of my nature.
Good and bad are but names very readily transferable to that or this;
the only right is what is after my own constitution;
the only wrong what is against it.”

~~ Ralph Waldo Emerson ~~

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I’m running late, as usual, so we’ll go with something easily available that fits my mood…. Since I feel like I should, or want to be, on the road to anywhere, we’ll take a little trip to the islands, imagining ourselves right onto some beach, where you’ll find us sipping margaritas, & dancing away…. Abondanza!….

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Jimmy Buffett
Live at Jones Beach

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“How happy is he born or taught,
That serveth not another’s will;
Whose armour is his honest thought,
And simple truth his utmost skill!”

~~ Sir Henry Wotton — The Character of a Happy Life ~~

I’m very late today, in terms of getting done, and posted. To save the time needed, we’re going to the archives. Don’t worry, it’s a rather light piece, just taking some random shots at some of the world’s biggest fools…. I’m sure I had fun, and you will too… Enjoy!….

From 2/11/2015:

INFIDEL, n. In New York, one who does not believe in the Christian religion; in Constantinople, one who does. (See GIAOUR.) A kind of scoundrel imperfectly reverent of, and niggardly contributory to, divines, ecclesiastics, popes, parsons, canons, monks, mollahs, voodoos, presbyters, hierophants, prelates, obeah-men, abbes, nuns, missionaries, exhorters, deacons, friars, hadjis, high-priests, muezzins, brahmins, medicine-men, confessors, eminences, elders, primates, prebendaries, pilgrims, prophets, imaums, beneficiaries, clerks, vicars-choral, archbishops, bishops, abbots, priors, preachers, padres, abbotesses, caloyers, palmers, curates, patriarchs, bonezs, santons, beadsmen, canonesses, residentiaries, diocesans, deans, subdeans, rural deans, abdals, charm-sellers, archdeacons, hierarchs, class-leaders, incumbents, capitulars, sheiks, talapoins, postulants, scribes, gooroos, precentors, beadles, fakeers, sextons, reverences, revivalists, cenobites, perpetual curates, chaplains, mudjoes, readers, novices, vicars, pastors, rabbis, ulemas, lamas, sacristans, vergers, dervises, lectors, church wardens, cardinals, prioresses, suffragans, acolytes, rectors, cures, sophis, mutifs and pumpums. — Ambrose Bierce, “The Devil’s Dictionary”

This space left unused for anything.

This space used for gold.

This space folded over into a ring.

This space remained untold.

No, I have not a single clue where the hell that came from, nor will you ever catch me asking, myself, or anyone else. In fact, I am going to state here and now, I didn’t say that, and you can’t prove I did.

I actually did leave this space blank, but, that was because I sort of intended to write a fresh rant this morning; I’ve got plenty of angst built up, trust me, what with crossing blades with large soulless corporate entities, butting heads with power-hungry local yokels, and dealing with my own personal inner demons as a result, well… trust me., I have more than enough about which to rant. But I’m tired of it all, and want something a bit more light hearted…. Let’s see what happens if I do this…..

Soft, intimate notes of romantic violins fills the air, while cooling breezes lift curtains to swirl and wave against the cerulean sky, peeking brightly through the tall windows. Mellow voices murmur quietly, spilling through the balcony doors, standing open to allow the elegantly dressed crowd pass in and out, enjoying the night air. As a young couple strolled hand in hand through the open passageway, a sudden scream rang out, stilling the crowd, piercing through the music as a hot knife through butter. Silence fell over the room, until a loud voice rings out, “Don’t worry, folks. She saw one of the clowns….”

Hmm… No, I don’t think that’s going to do it…. How about we go for an old-school pearl? I think, maybe, it’s the only chance we have left…. Since this is the ranting section, let’s see if SB can find us some nice, funny pokes to take at some of our favorite targets, shall we? (That is a rhetorical question, as, obviously, it’s now our ONLY chance…)…. Come on, we’d best get to it…. Oooh, here’s a good one to start….

We can’t really be wrong if we’re just following Gods orders
You know,
He wrote this book here
And in this book
He says that He made us to be just like Him
So if we’re dumb, then God’s dumb
(and perhaps a little ugly on the side)

~~ Frank Zappa ~~

Not too shabby for a beginner…. let’s see if we can finish this off with some style, or, maybe even some humor….

“I have no problem with God. It’s his fan clubs I hate.” — Smart Bee

“Yow! And then we could sit on the hoods of cars at stop lights!” — Zippy the Pinhead

“Now playing: “Man of La Muncha”” — Hannibal Lecter Dinner Theatre

“It is only the superficial qualities that last. Man’s deeper nature is soon found out.” — Oscar Wilde

(Oops. Sorry, Oscar slipped that one by me…. It’s not too far out there, so, it stays…)

“Rush Limbaugh: The Pillsbury Doughboy on acid.” — Smart Bee

“Ooops.” — Captain of Titanic

“If God is so great, how come everything he makes dies?” — George Carlin

Well. That was…. something. Not exactly your average mind numbing, brain-blowing experience, was it? Oh well. I guess we should go do something else now…. Oh. I see the problem now. How could I have forgotten THIS?

“When a person cannot deceive himself the chances are against his being able to deceive other people.” — Mark Twain

Duh….

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“Poetry and Hums aren’t things which you get,
they’re things which get you.
And all you can do is go where they can find you.”

~~ Winnie-the-Pooh, ~~

~~ Pooh’s Little Instruction Book, inspired by A. A. Milne ~~

Is It Alive?

Fighting into the light, words push hard to exist
each step closer to real brings another unique twist.
Shedding meaning for meaning, until bright, alone, and right
sculpting useless shapes, yet undefined, in pale morning’s light.

Never knowing the face is part of the lasting charm
bringing elegant focus, before sounding the alarm.
Advantageous time sends out messages, fears finding voice,
mulling options for flexibility, virtually without choice.

Fortunate man, who embraces the power of change;
’tis magical knowledge, bonding common to strange.
Weaving words of wonder, made strong by love and duty,
into a tapestry of life, and everlasting beauty.

~~ gigoid ~~

1/10/2013

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Naked Pearls

It sucks, AND, it blows….

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“I can handle reality in small doses,
but as a lifestyle it’s much too confining.”

~~ Lily Tomlin ~~

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“It takes courage to grow up and turn out to be who you really are.”

~~ ee cummings `~~

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“As for courage and will –
we cannot measure how much of each lies within us,
we can only trust there will be sufficient
to carry through trials which may lie ahead.”

~~ Andre Norton ~~

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“Entropy has us outnumbered.”

~~ Solomon Short ~~

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“Really, Crito, why should we care so much
about what ‘most people’ believe?”

~~ The character Socrates, in Plato’s “Crito”, 44d ~~

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“Remember: Silly is a state of Mind,
Stupid is a way of Life.”

~~ Dave Butler ~~

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“Pardon me, but do you know what it means
to be TRULY ONE with your BOOTH!”

~~ Zippy the Pinhead ~~

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Color me amazed. It’s done, and, not too shabbily, either, if I do say so meself. Before I do something dumb, like try to be witty, we’ll bring this to a somewhat dilatory end. I can’t say it’s the worst ever, but, it certainly isn’t the best. Y’all can decide for yourselves just what you think about it, and, share if you must. Me, I’m gonna go back to bed; it’s supposed to be really hot today, & I’ll need my energy to keep fanning the cat…. Hah! See y’all tomorrow, ffolkes; consider that all the warning you’ll get….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark,Theresa, & Richy
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid, the dubious

The *only* duly authorized Computer Curmudgeon.

PLEASE STOP READING THIS MESSAGE NOW.

“SCRAM!!!!!!!!!!”- Oscar the Grouch

À bientôt, mon cherí….