All bets were on the used carbuncle….

Oddity after oddity assails my senses. Torn between sleep and awake, and never ready for either one. Yes, I’d like to sleep, and yes, I’d like to dance, but the music isn’t very rhythmic, nor is the pillow soft. Clouds and colonoscopy don’t match my memory of how to succeed at business, but it does sell well. From yesterday all the way to today, I have counted the evens, and disregarded the odds, which is the only way to bet that the governor won’t tax it into submission. I don’t know, maybe we should just lay down our weapons, even if we aren’t going to surrender. Then we can have some pie ala mode…. and some coffee…..

Yes, please, some coffee…. I have made a serious miscalculation, and have run out of coffee. I am sitting here trying not to bite myself, hard, for being such an idiot. You see above what it can do to me…. that was supposed to be a haiku, and look what it turned into…. scary shit, if you ask me….. I think I’m hallucinating….. if not, then I wish I was, because this is the pits. I haven’t had this serious a withdrawal reaction in long time…. but then, it’s been a long time since I last had to do without coffee in the morning……

Rather than spend a long time complaining about it, I’m going to dive right in and start looking for material…. Shall we Pearl?

“Being normal isn’t one of my strengths.” — Smart Bee

Caution: Old School Pearl Ahead. Gird Your Grids For A Big One…..

“Two babies were born on the same day at the same hospital. They lay there and looked at each other.  Their families came and took them away.  Eighty years later, by a bizarre coincidence, they lay in the same hospital, on their deathbeds, next to each other.  One of them looked at the other and said, “So. What did you think?” — Steven Wright

A monk said to Joshu, “I have just entered this monastery. Please teach me.”
“Have you eaten your breakfast?” Joshu asked.
“Yes, I have,” replied the student.
“Then you had better wash your bowl.”
— Smart Buddhist Bee

“TAPPING?  You POLITICIANS!  Don’t you realize that the END of the “Wash Cycle” is a TREASURED MOMENT for most people?!” — Zippy the Pinhead

“I’ll get you my pretty,  and your little dog too!” — Wicked Witch of the East

“Don’t underestimate the value of Doing Nothing, of just going along, listening to all the things you can’t hear, and not bothering.” — Pooh’s Little Instruction Book, inspired by A. A. Milne

There, that should do it…. I’ve made this as clear as mud, obviously…. Don’t worry, though, it won’t be on the test…. In fact, it won’t even count toward graduation, not that we care about stuff like that…. But, it does make a good point, yes?  Nod your head…..

Because I could not stop for Death,
He kindly stopped for me;
The carriage held but just ourselves
And Immortality.

We slowly drove, he knew no haste,
And I had put away
My labor, and my leisure too,
For his civility.

We passed the school where children played,
Their lessons scarcely done;
We passed the fields of gazing grain,
We passed the setting sun.

We paused before a house that seemed
A swelling of the ground;
The roof was scarcely visible,
The cornice but a mound.

Since then ‘t is centuries; but each
Feels shorter than the day
I first surmised the horses’ heads
Were toward eternity.

— Emily Dickinson

I think this is Emily’s best known poem, and I know it is one of my favorites. It needs no adornment…. “Because I could not stop for Death, he kindly stopped for me…..”   Absolutely brilliant!

If his IQ was two points higher he’d be a rock. — Smart Bee

Normally, (as if that word had any meaning here…) I don’t use derogatory digs such as this one, unless it fits the humorous point I am trying to inject. If I don’t like someone, I’ll usually just call them an asshole, and be done with it.  In Mitt the Twitt’s case, I am making an exception, as I believe, after having had to listen to his drivel now for ages too long, that he deserves every foul name or insulting phrase we can throw at him. Not since Nixon have I felt such a burning lack of respect for a political figure, bordering on murderous hatred. Yes, I know, I don’t hold any of them in particularly high regard, but this guy has reached new levels of audacity in his quest for the brass ring, and for the title of The World’s Richest Asshole.

I’ll bet I can guess why he doesn’t want to release his tax returns…. I mean, other than the fact that a closer look at them might have the IRS doing the same, and deciding that an audit of his returns might be in order.  No, I’m betting that those returns will show exactly how he got so damn rich.

I’m betting that most of the money he has made with Bain Capital and the other money-laundering corporations he created, came from investors who were cheated out of retirement funds, or out of their life savings, by the sharks at these companies who solicit money for their schemes. I’m betting that those returns show that he has lied and cheated the American people repeatedly and often, all at his instigation, and with his approval.

Well, okay, maybe not active approval so much as indifferent denial; he may not have signed off on the schemes that netted him so much return, but he sure didn’t make any effort to see that it was of benefit to anyone but himself. As long as the money keeps rolling in, he doesn’t give a damn who suffers because of that. To him, the man on the street is only a mark, a fool and his money, and he doesn’t care a whit about whatever suffering is created by his business practices. “It’s just business….”

It’s gotten to the point now where I am about ready to talk to the man myself. He is in dire need of a dose of being read to from the Book of Righteousness, and I would be happy to do the reading. And I will say this….. if it looks as if there is even the remotest chance of his election, this country will be in danger of another Civil War. His divisive tactics and complete dishonesty are already causing a lot of murmuring under the radar, and a political disaster, such as his actual election to office, will only make things worse than they are now.

Of course, such a conflict might cause him and his cronies to drop the charade, and order out the National Guard to fight against American citizens. Hell, it might go so far as to have him declare martial law, and throw the Constitution and the Bill of Rights all the way out the window…. It wouldn’t surprise me a bit, as it is something that the beloved ruling class has been hoping for, because, in spite of what may seem like otherwise, they have more guns, and they won’t hesitate to use them, even on their own countrymen….

Perhaps my bilious state just now can be attributed to a lack of coffee. If so, so what? It doesn’t alter reality, and the reality is that Mitt the Twitt is possibly the greatest danger this country has ever faced. He and his ilk are making their bid to take complete control of everything, right in front of us. Hell, they are such good liars they’ve got millions of really, really stupid people already convinced they are honest, upright men, and have the public’s well-being in mind. In fact, Mitt is a congenital liar, as well as a religious fanatic, who wants nothing more than the complete subjugation of all non-white, non-Mormon, poor Americans. (“Poor” being relative…. to Mitt, anything under $250,000/year is peanuts….).

Ptah! Thppt!  Talking about these assholes has given me a dry mouth….. I don’t know ffolkes…. It looks pretty bad some days, and today is one of those days…. Ah well, at least the Twitt is busy running around Europe sticking his foot in his mouth, and we don’t have to listen to him directly…. until he gets back…. Maybe we’ll get lucky, and he’ll get caught at the airport trying to smuggle in a new dancing horse…. or better yet, a new domestic servant that he picked up in Africa….. It could work….. Ya think?……

All things considered, I feel lucky to have been able to complete today’s Pearl. If the rest of the day goes like this, well, I’m not sure what I’ll do…. I suppose I’ll just have to take it as it comes, and deal with it as best I may….. Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you…..

Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.