Safely ensconced in a new/old cave…..

Posted on September 1, 2013 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

No worries today, not about the intro…. Yesterday, I moved into a house with my lady Patricia…. Only a few blocks away, but, everything had to go, so, we went… Today, I’m exhausted, still, even though I spent the day watching other people do all the lifting and packing; supervision is harder than it looks, especially when you’re paying for it all.

Ultimately, it got done, in relative jig time, as the actual move was finished in 5 hours, total ( IMNSHO, it’s definitely worth the money to hire professionals; they packed two apartments, and moved all of it, in four hours flat, actually, the rest was set-up and breakdown, and paperwork….). Any who, all things said and done, it’s done, but, counting the cable guy who didn’t come until 1800, it took all day, beginning at 0600, and I ended up standing around a LOT…. hence, exhaustion…

But, no extra pain, so all is well; fatigue will pass over time, as I rest, my only effort being to putter around putting stuff away, or figuring out where to put stuff, or, maybe, moving it to the storage space we now have in the garage…. However, it also means this Pearl will have to come from the archives, as I just don’t have the wherewithal to create a fresh one… C’est la vie, mon amis… At least the internet isn’t an issue this time… the cable guy came late, but stayed until it all worked properly, so, we’re good to go in that respect. Gotta love technology…

I hope y’all enjoy whatever I find for reading today… I’ll be back tomorrow, with some stuff I want to say about the situation that is developing again in the Middle East, with Syria’s civil war…. What a clusterfuck that is turning out to be… Tomorrow…. for now, here are some pearls pulled from various points in the past two years….

“I wish I was on a Cincinnati street corner holding a clean dog!” — Zippy the Pinhead
_____________________________

The Pearl of Virtual Wisdom posted on 9/27/11:

Ffolkes,

Morgan Templeton watched with some small pleasure, as the sun rose majestically above the western hills, ablaze with the promise of the new day. As the light spread, he pushed away from the tree against which he leaned, and strode purposefully down to his waiting horse. Swinging lightly into the saddle, he urged the horse into a canter, away from the rising sun, toward the towering trees of the forest that lay across the horizon to the west.

Slowing the horse to a walk as he entered the trees, Morgan passed within the vale, following a slight path that wound through oak, madrone, the occasional pine or fir, meandering ever further into the woods. His eyes never stopped moving, side to side, up and down, back again. He knew it was relatively safe in this part of the forest, but long years of living in danger had taught him never to lose track of his surroundings, lest death try to become too familiar. Safety lay in remaining alert; Morgan had good reason to stay alive, very good reason indeed.

So, I was talking to a friend yesterday, and he says to me, “I just got a new computer for my wife.” I told him, “good trade, dude.” A little humor is always a good way to start the day, don’t you think? I know it always helps me to approach the day with a lighter heart.

What’s that? What happened to Morgan in the forest? Hell, your guess is as good as mine; I just write the damn stuff, I don’t pay any attention to it beyond the spell check. It got me this far, didn’t it? Some days that kind of drivel just leaps onto the screen; some days it leads somewhere, some days not so much. So today was a not so much. Remember what you are paying for this, and be content….it’s worth every penny…..

“In walking, just walk. In sitting, just sit. Above all, don’t wobble.” — Yun-Men

‘You govern a kingdom by normal rules;
You fight a war by exceptional moves;
But you win the world by letting alone,
How do I know that this is so?
By what is within me!
The more taboo and inhibitions there are in the world,
The poorer the people become.
The sharper the weapons the people posses,
The greater confusion reigns in the realm.
The more clever and crafty the men,
The oftener strange things happen.
The more articulate the laws and ordinances,
The more robbers and thieves arise.’
— Tao Teh Ching #57, Lao Tzu

Be the master of your will and the slave of your conscience. — Hasidic saying

In bed we laugh, in bed we cry;
And, born in bed, in bed we die.
The near approach a bed may show
Of human bliss to human woe.

— Isaac de Benserade (1612-1691)

“I can remember the first time I had to go to sleep. Mom said, “Steven, time to go to sleep.” I said, “But I don’t know how.” She said, “It’s real easy. Just go down to the end of tired and hang a left.” So I went down to the end of tired, and just out of curiosity I hung a right. My mother was there, and she said “I thought I told you to go to sleep.” — Steven Wright

I love this one…”above all, don’t wobble.” Priceless! Perfect advice for leading the good life; don’t wobble. Good stuff…..y’all take care out there…..
_____________________________

This isn’t from an old pearl, though it has been used in one, at one time or another… It is, however, from the person whose poems I turn to whenever I am feeling…. different….

I’m nobody! Who are you?
Are you nobody, too?
Then there’s a pair of us — don’t tell!
They’d advertise — you know!

How dreary to be somebody!
How public like a frog
To tell one’s name the livelong day
To an admiring bog!

~~ Emily Dickinson ~~

_____________________________

The Pearl of Virtual Wisdom posted on 8/28/11:

Ffolkes,

So many things going around and around in my mind, nothing wants to settle…..it occurred to me this morning that today will be the first day in over 33 years that I have lived alone. For 23 years, up until 2002, I was married and raising our kids; we spent a few days here and there not in each other’s company, but for the most part, we were together, or I was with the kids.

After my wife and I parted ways, and the kids all grown, Noah, my old Aussie heeler mix, stayed with me, and until yesterday, was my constant and faithful companion and friend; dogs never change their minds when they have chosen their object of affection. This, then, will be a relatively new situation, one that will, I think, require some rather sweeping adjustments on my part. I have no regrets in my life, other than those natural when love chooses not to stay, yet I cannot help but wonder how different life would be had things gone otherwise than they have done.

Well, such is life; we have no choice but to take it as it comes, and do our best to live with dignity and honor. So far, I have managed to live with honor; dignity has been harder to maintain at times, in the face of the harsh light of reality. All I can really say for sure at this point is, I still live. And as long as there is life, there is hope……(thank you Edgar Rice Burroughs)……This morning’s selections were chosen with ‘mind on hold’, but in retrospect, that was probably for the best…….

“I tore myself away from the safe comfort of certainties through my love for truth – and truth rewarded me.” — Simone de Beauvoir

We are not victims of the world we see, but of the way we see the world.

“Blessed is he who has learned to laugh at himself, for he shall never cease to be entertained.” — John Powell

“Official truths are often powerful illusions.” — John Pilger, _Distant_Voices_, 1992 (In today’s world, “often” can be changed to “virtually always”….)

“These PRESERVES should be FORCE-FED to PENTAGON OFFICIALS!!” — Zippy the Pinhead

I stood
Among them, but not of them; in a shroud
Of thoughts which were not their thoughts.

— Lord Byron (1788-1824) — Childe Harold’s Pilgrimage, Canto iii, Stanza 113

Doubt is the beginning, not the end, of wisdom.

I guess all I can say at this point is, it’s all a wash. Not a do-over, but at least a start-over. Life, that is, not the Pearl…. Step by step, walking the path toward the future, eyes ahead and eager for new sights, new sounds. If I wasn’t so bummed, I’d be excited; I suppose that in itself could be considered a small life lesson. Sweet and bitter are two sides of the same bagel, and we all would do well to keep that firmly in mind as we find our way down that long road upon which we have set our feet……y’all take care out there…..
_____________________________

Okay, for a throw-together Pearl, it looks pretty good…. It went fast, anyway, and that was key for today…. As in the intro section, I’ll try to keep from getting crazy, and surprise everyone by just ending it….. here.

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Save those false pretenses for the coffee cake….

Posted on August 25, 2013 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

Okay, so what’s the deal here? I get up, all sleepy and grumpy, hoping to find that all is well, and I can get on with the day, only to find that nothing has changed….

There were supposed to be dancing girls! Yes! Right there in the parlor. And, they were supposed to be wearing matching caftans! But, no, what do I find upon arising? A parlor full of dancing engineering students, wearing togas! Boy! You just can’t depend on anybody these days!…. Since we’re having to forgo the dancing girls, we may as well get started on today’s Pearl….. I suppose I also should come back into a more realistic voice, to make sure everyone ends up on the same page, so to speak….

Hi there! Good morning, sort of… We’re here in gigoid’s parlor, dodging the guys in horn rims dancing around, and waiting for inspiration to show up…. The muses are a bit edgy when they come here, due to Murphy’s uncomfortable habit of including them in his machinations, so I like to have them met at the door, and made welcome…. I had word that they, or, at least, one of them, would be showing up here about now to deliver what I left with them some time ago….

Oh, don’t worry, it’s not anything dangerous… at least, not any more so than the usual stuff we handle here. No, it’s merely some subject lines, a matched set of aphorisms, some platitudes, and a few choice phrases I left in their office when I was there a few days ago; I’ve got others, but, they were out this way today for deliveries anyway, so… I’m almost certain that there was definitely one item they’re bringing that I can use today, but, I don’t remember exactly which stuff got left there, so I have to wait to see it before I can go any further with today’s post…..

Does this mean we’re going to be forced to listen to more of my blathering here in the intro section?…. Well, yes, sad to say, it does mean that…. State law and internet etiquette requires me to provide you with some form of mental stimulation during these episodes, so, let’s see what kind of nonsense I can come up with today…. I mean, it’s not like we’ve already wandered around with our thumbs up our….. oh, wait, yes we have. In fact, that is what we seem to be doing right this very moment, if I’m not mistaken…

No, by heavens, I’m not! We HAVE been wandering around with SOMETHING up our…. well, somewhere, anyway. And, look! We’ve done it again! If you will note, there are five legal sized paragraphs above, all of which are pointing in the same direction, if not with any clarity of purpose. The law governing such things says this is enough for an intro, and around here, we pay close attention to that law…. we have to, due to gigoid’s lack of talent in this section…. Now that my covers are completely on the floor, we’d best get on with it…

Shall we Pearl?…..

Delivers in such apt and gracious words
That aged ears play truant at his tales,
And younger hearings are quite ravished;
So sweet and voluble is his discourse.

— William Shakespeare (1564-1616), Love’s Labour’s Lost — Act ii, Sc. 1

(I know, terrible rhyme, but, it fits, sort of….) (Now you know why you don’t see Will’s work here very often….)
_____________________________

Of all the causes which conspire to blind
Man’s erring judgment, and misguide the mind;
What the weak head with strongest bias rules,–
Is pride, the never-failing vice of fools.

— Alexander Pope (1688-1744) — Essay on Criticism, Part ii, Line 1

Now, THAT’S a poem!….

Yesterday, I had a bit of time with reduced pain, so I went to cruise the net, heading off to a few WP sites to catch up with some of my favorites, and check out a couple of new ones… I ended up going to quite a few blogs, compared to my normal inability to get anywhere. In my cruise, though, I noted something I hadn’t previously been aware of, regarding the demographics of the ‘Net, in terms of the stand that people take in political matters…

What I noticed is that there is a fairly wide array of opinions, wider than I had known, and certainly wider than anticipated…. But, I also noted that there are way too few of them who seem to be aware of just how badly they are being fooled by those whom they are following in their political pursuits…

On both the right wing, and the left, there seems to be a common ignorance of just how often the BRC lies to the public, and of how little they really care about the people who are behind them on the wagon they are driving…. Not only is this the case, but, there are a LOT of people out there who either don’t care, or don’t have the moral courage to express an opinion about any of what is happening out in the real world. In fact, this latter group, those who choose to ignore the world as much as they can, is the largest group by far…..

“Stupidity may be masked by sincerity, but it is still stupidity.” — Smart Bee

This means, not only are those who are involved in the issues ignorant of the actual truth, but nobody else, aside from a few curmudgeons like me, who hate EVERYBODY, (joke… we just don’t discriminate against anyone when it comes to being critical…. in my mind, they’re ALL fuck-tards….), has any idea of how little integrity, or real knowledge of what is truth, or, for that matter, common sense, there is loose in the world today…. All three of those items, essential to a healthy society, are lacking in our current world culture…. In point of fact, all three of those ideas are not only not loose, they seem to be totally absent from our reality…. much to our chagrin….

SIGH…. This is a rather amorphous rant, isn’t it? I’m railing against human nature again, which is such a huge, slippery concept, it’s difficult to confine it to one or two simple ideas for discussion…. Suffice it to say, my picture of humanity, even that part of it that is tech-savvy enough, and independently-minded enough, to have their own blogs on the ‘Net, fails to show me any of the qualities that will ensure our survival for much longer, and, actually, shows a lot of evidence that supports our extinction within the next 100-200 years….

Once the atmospheric levels of oxygen, carbon monoxide, carbon dioxide, and the other elements that make up what we breathe, have been altered to the point of no return, (which happened two years ago….) it will not take long for us to succumb, as the process of degradation acts in a parabolic fashion, faster and faster the longer it goes on…. The ice will continue to melt, the seas will continue to rise, the air to get dirty, the weather to get stranger, and the people will continue to hide their heads in the sand….

It’s a sad commentary on our race, to my mind, when we, as a species, can’t even seem to pull it together long enough to make a concerted effort to stop those who have destroyed the environment we inhabit, as they have for millennia, and continue to do today, all out of their insatiable greed and utter inhumanity, aided and abetted by the ignorance embraced by most of the rest of humanity .

Hell, most of humanity isn’t even aware there is a problem, or any danger…. How does one overcome that level of ignorance?….. The BRC is a lot better at the carrot and stick routine than are the more honorable people in our world, and aren’t going to allow anyone to take away their privileges and perks; they’ve been at it for centuries, and are so good at it, most people never even realize they are slaves….

Okay, so I’ve ranted…. now I’m gonna go old-school… just because I can….

“A person reveals his character by nothing so clearly as the joke he resents.” — G.C. Lichtenberg

“What the hell, go ahead and put all your eggs in one basket.” — Smart Bee

“You cannot believe in honor unless you have achieved it. Better keep yourself clean and bright; you are the window through which you must see the world.” — George Bernard Shaw

Assume a virtue, if you have it not.
That monster, custom, who all sense doth eat,
Of habits devil, is angel yet in this.
— William Shakespeare (1564-1616), Hamlet
— Act iii, Sc. 4

[A small difference of opinion on the U.S. Supreme Court in ‘Texas v. Johnson’ 491 U.S. 397 (1989)

“If there is a bedrock principle underlying the First Amendment, it is that the Government may not prohibit the expression of an idea simply because society finds the idea itself offensive or disagreeable.” — Justice William J. Brennan, writing for the majority

“Surely one of the purposes of a democratic society is to legislate against conduct that is regarded as evil and profoundly offensive to the majority of people; whether it be murder, embezzlement, pollution or flag burning.” — Chief Justice William Rehnquist, dissenting

(The question that occurs to me on reading this is this: how can a supposedly intelligent person, with a law degree and everything, have misunderstood the Constitution so badly?….. Astounding, not to even mention how stupid it is, to even TRY to rationalize the legislation of morality, which, in Mr. Rehnquist’s mind, or what passes for one, is confused with custom…. In spite of what many religious fundamentalists, and both right and left wing politicians, would have us believe, morality cannot be legislated, or, for that matter, influenced in any way at all by anything outside the person whose morality is under question…. Nor should morality be confused with custom; they are not the same thing…. nor should they be….)

(The second thing that occurred to me upon reading this was: Does it physically hurt to be that stupid?….)

😆

“Late in the night, we realize that the acts of our lives have not been shadow-free, that we are shadowed by curses and sins –not because we are cursed and sinful by nature, but because with the very origins of the world, one half of which belongs to night, come fearful figures who demand we know them.” — James Hillman

“What GOOD is a CARDBOARD suitcase ANYWAY?” — Zippy the Pinhead

Oops…. sorry, went a little off the rails there at the end; Zippy’s lines can do that, usually without conscious effort on my part…. But, it does rather fit, don’t you think?…. Just think of morality as the suitcase…. go ahead, it’s really not hard, and doesn’t hurt much, once you’re past the initial shock….
_____________________________

Having awakened in a “mood”, I’m trying not to let that spill over into this…. how’m I doin’?…. Oh…. Well, I’m trying, and will continue to do so, so, that’s worth something, right? Right…. Maybe this will make up for it…..

Apollo And The Graces

APOLLO

WHICH of the fairest three
To-day will ride with me?
My steeds are all pawing at the threshold of the morn:
Which of the fairest three
To-day will ride with me
Across the gold Autumn’s whole Kingdom of corn?

THE GRACES all answer

I will, I – I – I
young Apollo let me fly
Along with thee,
I will- I, I, I,
The many wonders see
I – I – I – I
And thy lyre shall never have a slackened string:
I, I, I, I,
Thro’ the golden day will sing.

~~ John Keats ~~

_____________________________

Well, gosh…. I’m not sure what to do now…. I’ve already supplied a fresh, newly minted rant, put together an old-school pearl with some great pearls, and found a great poem…. It’s not often I’m a tough act to follow, but I seem to have put myself in that position, so, we’ll apply some cosmic judo to the issue…. Here are pearls in a bunch…. not grouped, not chosen, just bunched up, into sort of a bouquet… Let’s see what happens….

“Fleas can be taught nearly everything a lawyer can.”” — Smart Bee

The Three Stooges, the sinking ship, and the lone lifeboat:

Ronald Reagan: “Maybe we should save the women and children.”
Richard Nixon: “F**k the women and children!”
Bob Packwood: “Gee, do you really think we have time?”

— the Stilt Man

“Ever notice that ‘what the hell?’ is always the right decision?” — Marilyn Monroe

Q: “How many lawyer jokes are there? A: 3, the rest are true stories.” — Smart Bee

“Among the rich you will never find a really generous man even by accident. They may give their money away, but they will never give themselves away; they are egotistic, secretive, dry as old bones. To be smart enough to get all that money you must be dull enough to want it.” — G. K. Chesterton, A Miscellany of Men

“No act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted.” — Aesop (620-560 B.C.)

LIFE, n. A spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay. We live in daily apprehension of its loss; yet when lost it is not missed. The question, “Is life worth living?” has been much discussed; particularly by those who think it is not, many of whom have written at great length in support of their view and by careful observance of the laws of health enjoyed for long terms of years the honors of successful controversy.

“Life’s not worth living, and that’s the truth,”
Carelessly caroled the golden youth.
In manhood still he maintained that view
And held it more strongly the older he grew.
When kicked by a jackass at eighty-three,
“Go fetch me a surgeon at once!” cried he.
Han Soper

— Ambrose Bierce, “The Devil’s Dictionary”
_____________________________

“The sixties were good to you, weren’t they?” — George Carlin

Why, yes, George, yes, they were…. which should be moderately obvious to even the most casual observer…. Now you’ve done it… You’ve uncovered my secret plan, to confuse everyone with so many words, that make such little sense, you don’t know which ones to pick for use, and the little easter eggs I’ve strewn throughout the pages can work their clandestine, subliminal magic….

Oh, well, it couldn’t last forever…. I’ll just go back to the old way of doing things, and bore everyone to tears, but, get just as much done…. For now, though, this will have to do, so I’d best see if it’s worthy…. Be right back….

I must say, after going through it, THIS is a Pearl!…. Somehow, in spite of all Murphy and his myrmidons have conspired to foist upon me, the poor lad will be forced to consider today a major fail…. This ain’t bad at all…. It’s good enough to post, anyway, so, I’m going with that….. In fact, I’m going to get out of here, while the getting is good…..

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

We’ll have an asparagus pizza, and the Neopolitan pudding….

Posted on August 8, 2013 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

I just want to be on record as saying that I believe, contrary to consensus opinion, Brussels sprouts are not little green balls of Evil. There are occasions, I will admit, when they’ve been used to foster Evil’s ends; infrequently, but, always fearfully, they are forced upon unwilling, terrified children as a form of hideous torture, in plain view at family meals, but, in my view, they are not inherently bad, merely easily manipulated…. That being said, we can get on with the day’s business, even though the ambiance regulator has already been set on weird…. S’okay, anything to do with Brussels sprouts can be considered weird, so, we’re good to go, conceptually….

And, then, I woke up…. dazed and confused doesn’t begin to describe the state of my no-mind…. which I don’t mean in a Zen sense, no sirree bob…. It does, however, mean I’m awake, after a fashion…. That is, if that word can legally be used to describe what I am just now…. I’m not sure of anything other than the fact that, since I’m writing this the night before, it is only an approximation, based on prior experiences, and may, or may not, be completely congruent with reality as it exists then…. or, now…. or, whenever it may, or may not be….. Now, I’m not sure what day it is anymore, and I think I’ll go back to bed…. try to start over….

The above paragraphs seem to have been left for me this morning, though I don’t recall having written them…. It must be a touch of early onset Alzheimer’s, or something….

No, actually, I’ll be honest…. I did write them last night, and all in all, I think they’re not bad, if a bit odd. I was going to try to pass them off as forgotten, or as fresh, but, my honesty bone wouldn’t allow it, so I’m admitting them to be a plant….. No harm, no foul, right? If nothing else, it got me this far down the line into the intro, and not having to struggle for that is a bonus, for sure…. I’ve given up on finding the right template for this section, and now just let it flow as it occurs….

It has worked out fairly well that way, though it still causes me some worry, when I stare at the screen each morning, praying hypocritically for inspiration…. I’m flexible, and if there is a God, and He wants to help out, fine…. I don’t think so, but, I’ve been known to be wrong a couple of times in the past, and it can happen to anyone, so I like to leave some room for changing my mind, if necessary….

Like any real writer, I’d sell my mother’s soul for a good line or two…. I’d feel guilty for a few minutes, but, I’d do it, especially if promised a complete poem…. Since, by my way of thinking, there isn’t a God, and, thus, no Devil, either, I’m pretty sure I’m safe in that respect…. Knowing this doesn’t stop the worry, but, it does keep me sane…. well, I think so, but, who am I to contradict the professionals?….

Shall we Pearl?…
_____________________________

The article to which the link below points, was written by a man with my dream job, had I any remaining interest at all in working for a living…. His name is Mark Morford, and he is a columnist for the SF Chronicle, writing a very long column once or twice a week, each of which shows an incredible command of the English written word, as well as, possibly, the largest vocabulary I have ever seen in actual use…

He doesn’t just use the language, he USES it, with great style, power, and facility, fueled by a sharply observant mind, and a cynical, doubting eye… Is it any wonder I like his stuff?…. Any who, he wrote a piece that I want to share with y’all, about a subject I rant on frequently, i.e., the lies we are told every day, by people at all levels of society, who don’t care to observe any sort of honesty in their lifestyles, to wit: practically everyone in positions of authority, for that matter, in any position at all…. I think you’ll enjoy it, and it will save me the time, which I can use to find more pearls for your delectation….

http://blog.sfgate.com/morford/2013/08/06/100-percent-all-natural-lies/

I couldn’t have said it better myself, and have done so in the past (you figure out the context in that sentence, if you wish, I couldn’t….), no humor intended, though it’s probably hilarious, taken correctly….. Any who, I thought it was a very clear, very convincing argument regarding the constant barrage of lies we receive every day from those who choose the news….

The corporations set the agendas, the beloved ruling class keeps the populace distracted, the judges protect them, the police bully the populace into following the corporate rules, and the preachers preach obedience to temporal authority, and pocket their kickbacks…. It’s been this way since the first cavemen got together to barter, way back before Jesus kicked the sticks out of his crib, and, still today, not enough ffolkes are aware of it all to make a difference in the outcome…..

SIGH…. It makes me wonder how humans can consider themselves as the most intelligent animal on this planet, because they sure don’t display much of it…. Since Mr. Morford was so illuminating with his article, I’ll merely try to get you to smile in acknowledgment, while promoting the same message with my pearls….

“Well, there were sixty-eight people there, and sixty-two of them had no more desire to throw a stone than you had, Satan!”
“Oh, it’s true. I know your race. It is made up of sheep. It is governed by minorities, seldom or never by majorities. It suppresses its feelings and its beliefs and follows the handful that makes the most noise. Sometimes the noisy handful is right, sometimes wrong; but no matter, the crowd follows it. The vast majority of the race, whether savage or civilized, are secretly kind- hearted and shrink from inflicting pain, but in the presence of the aggressive and pitiless minority they don’t dare to assert themselves. Think of it! One kind-hearted creature spies upon another, and sees to it that he loyally helps in iniquities which revolt both of them. Speaking as an expert, I know that ninety-nine out of a hundred of your race were strongly against the killing of witches when that foolishness was first agitated by a handful of pious lunatics in the long ago. And I know that even to-day, after ages of transmitted prejudice and silly teaching, only one person in twenty puts any real heart into the harrying of a witch. And yet apparently everybody hates witches and wants them killed. Some day a handful will rise up on the other side and make the most noise — perhaps even a single daring man with a big voice and a determined front will do it — and in a week all the sheep will wheel and follow him, and witch-hunting will come to a sudden end.” — Mark Twain, The Mysterious Stranger

“The news is the one thing the networks can point to with pride. Everything else they do is crap – and they know it.” — Fred Friendly, 1980

“State legislators are merely politicians whose darkest secret prohibits them from running for higher office.” — Dennis Miller

“The trouble with Congress is every time they make a law, it’s a joke, and every time they make a joke, it’s a law!” — Will Rogers

“When politicians rush to fix things, it’s a sure sign that either the intended patient is dead or fully healed.” — Tony Snow (News Commentator, 2002)

“The problem of civil society is twofold: how to identify and select wise rulers, and how to assure that their wisdom will be used for the benefit of the ruled- or of the common good as distinct from their private good.” — Harry V. Jaffa

“To see what’s in front of one’s nose requires a constant struggle.” — George Orwell
_____________________________

I love poetry, as is probably apparent by my daily inclusion of one or more of them in these Pearls…. One of the reasons is that the power of words seems to increase when used well in a poem; the meaning of each seems to be larger, and amenable to greater flexibility of that meaning, allowing the poet to address more than one issue with the same words…. The following poem from one of my favorite poets is a perfect example of this, as so elegantly demonstrated in the final line…. Looked at with a certain viewpoint, this poem is a perfect complement to the rants above, in section one, both mine, and the one from Mr. Morford, as well…. Enjoy!…..

Epigram Engraved on the Collar of a Dog Which I Gave to His Royal Highness

I am his Highness’ dog at Kew;
Pray tell me, sir, whose dog are you?

~~ Alexander Pope ~~

_____________________________

I’m tired already, but not in either a physical or mental sense…. I’m just old, and feeling it. Regardless of the ‘why’, I need to get this last section filled in with something appropriate, so, I’m going to show exactly how lazy I’m able to be, and go with another old school pearl…. I have no excuse, nor do I feel I need one, as this pearl’s entire purpose is entertainment, not elucidation, or education, or even edification…. I know it can be a difficult task, but try to enjoy this, okay? It’s all in fun….

Axiom #2: “Ability to type on a computer terminal is no guarantee of sanity, intelligence, or common sense.”
Corollary #3: “An infinite number of monkeys at an infinite number of keyboards could produce something like Usenet.”
Corollary #4: “They could do a better job of it.”

— Gene Spafford, USENET Axiom #2
(Now you know more about the process of creating these Pearls than I ever intended anyone to know….)

“Real suffering has a face and a smell. It lasts in its most intense form no matter what you drape over it. And it knows your name.” — Mary Karr’s The Liar’s Club
(Scary thought, eh? All too true, though, in almost everyone’s life….)
(I thought we were being funny? Oh, right, we are…. sorry, got distracted….)
(Okay, I’ll stop commenting now….)

“Natives who beat drums to drive off evil spirits are objects of scorn to smart Americans who blow horns to break up traffic jams.” — Mary Ellen Kelly

“When choosing between two evils I always like to take the one I’ve never tried before.” — Mae West, in “Klondike Annie” 1936

“At 50 everyone has the face he deserves.” — George Orwell (1903-1950), “Journals”, 1949

“Never meddle in the affairs of dragons, for, to them, you are crunchy, and tasty with ketchup.” — Anonymous

“The evidence of the emotions, save in cases where it has strong objective support, is really no evidence at all, for every recognizable emotion has its opposite, and if one points one way then another points the other way. Thus the familiar argument that there is an instinctive desire for immortality, and that this desire proves it to be a fact, becomes puerile when it is recalled that there is also a powerful and widespread fear of annihilation, and that this fear, on the same principle proves that there is nothing beyond the grave. Such childish proofs are typically theological, and they remain theological even when they are adduced by men who like to flatter themselves by believing that they are scientific gents…” — H. L. Mencken

I understand that more than a few of you may have become confused by the tone of the last quote, and may possibly have harmed innocent brain cells in the process of bringing your mind around in a 180 degree turn like that, especially if you kept looking for the punch line….

All I can say is, sorry about that…. I saw the quote, and it was just so clearly reasoned, and so logically presented, and gave such a strong message of the power of reason and doubt, I couldn’t help myself…. Plus, its inclusion here could be considered a joke, so….. Any who, I hope you enjoyed this little trip into the less than perfectly sane areas of my head…..
_____________________________

Whew! That was an epic Pearl, to be sure…. I’m almost afraid to go proof it, but, being the dutiful lad I am…. Epic, I think, is quite accurate. Since I am so uncertain as to how the entire picture of this Pearl looks (it’s too big today to get a good grasp….), I’m going to trust my luck, and the fact that nobody really cares, and go ahead and post it…. I like it, and that is enough for me…. (Is this where I say nyah, nyah, nyah…. and make a rude gesture with my hands?…. No? Oh right, we don’t do that any more….)

I’m going to go now, before the voices get any louder, and start slipping in parenthetical thoughts on me…. Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you….

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Put the cheeseburger down, sir, and step back from the condiments….

Posted on August 7, 2013 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

Traffic has been light this morning, and what is there is moving along well, so I guess it’s okay to get started…. Not that traffic has anything to do with this, but, it works on the radio, so I thought I’d give it a try…. By this time in the process, it really doesn’t matter what I do, it’s all going to be wrong, or misguided somehow, and whatever I produce will crash and burn within moments. The investigators are never able to tell afterward exactly why it crashes (the burning part is obvious…. leaking fuel, oxygen, heat, all present…. only the ‘why’ is mysterious…), but, it does. I really don’t expect them to know how to determine sabotage by icons of nature like Murphy, as he is well able to make such things appear to be due to natural causes…..

You know what I mean by that, right? Natural causes? Same thing the beloved ruling class means when they say some political prisoner died in custody, of “natural causes”, to wit: they killed them…. Oh, they might call it “pilot error” but it was “termination with prejudice”, you can bet on it….. Sorry, but anybody who, during an election campaign, says they’ll stop what is being done to people at Guantanamo, and at other facilities, in other countries, where it doesn’t break our laws so blatantly, and then totally ignores the whole issue, isn’t what I would call trustworthy, and can’t be counted on to tell the truth about anything.

SIGH…. there I go, ranting again in the intro…. It just seems to keep popping out, with little provocation. I mean, how much provocation can I claim at 5:55 in the morning, unless, for some unknown, and unwelcome, reason, I’ve been dreaming about this stuff, which I don’t think I’ve been doing…. not so’s I remember, anyway. It doesn’t matter, really, though, because I’d planned to rant today, so this can be considered a warm-up, or stretching exercises…. As long as you don’t consider it terrible, and go away, I’ll be happy….. It gets so lonely around here in the mornings, and the neighbors don’t appreciate me breaking out my guitar at this hour, so, I’m stuck with this computer, and my imaginary audience, for company…. Sad image, isn’t it?….

Don’t be sad, though, because I like it like this…. Now that much of the stress is gone from my life, of waiting for the bureaucrats to act, for my retirement to kick in, for poverty to end (at least for me…), I am able to enjoy my retirement time, getting a big kick out of watching the world run around like crazy, acting out the panoply of human stories and games, and knowing that nobody has any say about what I do, or when I do it, other than me, myself, and I…. and, of course, Patricia, to whom I’ve lost my heart…. She’s allowed to take up my time with her business on an “ad lib” basis…. but, I can’t consider that an onerous chore, or any kind of bother…. rather the opposite, truth be known….

Okay, well, I’ve blathered and meandered, and wound my way through another four paragraphs that don’t say much of anything, other than some pointless attempts at humor…. I should probably take my own advice, and not try to do that so early, especially before the coffee has kicked in fully….. but, SOMEBODY has to do it, and I’ve never been one to shirk my duty, once I know what it is….

The upshot of all this is, I’ve met the legal requirements for this blog’s opening remarks, so, I’m going to take that assessment and run with it…. If nothing else, it will prevent the formation of bruising around the eyes, where it feels as if I’ve been punching myself since I got up, twenty minutes ago…. Hmm, maybe I wasn’t done sleeping…. Ya think?…. Oh, well….

Shall we Pearl?…..
_____________________________

As noted above, I tend to rant at the slightest provocation, and, though that tendency isn’t one I particularly wish to curtail completely, it is one that contributes to at least one of the problematic characteristics of blogging, a long winded way to say it makes these posts too long sometimes…. Then, I feel guilty, for taking up so much of people’s time, and ending up preaching to the choir, anyway…. This is why I’ve been resorting so often to old-school pearls to get my points across, or at least, out there for perusal and cognitive processing… Again, in short, it’s easier, on you, and, to some extent, on me….

Yesterday, I read an article in the news (you can read it here: http://blog.sfgate.com/nov05election/2013/08/06/planet-continues-to-warm-to-new-normal/ ) about climate change. The article discussed the yearly report, from the world’s scientific community, on the extent of the changes in the Earth’s average temperature, the changes in the polar ice, and the rising of the world’s oceans, as the increasing temperature melts those polar ice packs, little by little… The report itself makes no attempt to ascertain, or explain, the causes of the warming; it only reports the factual numbers of how much is changing each year…. It does note, however, that the levels of carbon dioxide and carbon monoxide in the atmosphere on their scale of measurement haven’t been seen on our planet for approximately 800,000 (!) years….

A little learning is a dangerous thing;
Drink deep, or taste not the Pierian spring:
There shallow draughts intoxicate the brain,
And drinking largely sobers us again.

— Alexander Pope (1688-1744) — Essay on Criticism, Part ii, Line 15

I haven’t seen the reaction yet from the fringes of the far right of the political scene, but I expect them to be out any time, once again parading the extent of their ignorance, shouting their outrage at the numbers, claiming that the scientists are “fudging” them, or claiming that we humans don’t understand what the numbers mean, because we don’t have infinite knowledge, like they do…. because “they” believe in God, which gives them the right to challenge the scientist’s figures…. If asked to do so, I could probably write one of their articles; it doesn’t seem hard, as one needn’t bother with presenting any facts, or evidence to support one’s theories…. I would, of course, feel very silly, but, I could do it….

Don’t worry, I won’t; plenty of others will do so, with much more sincerity, if less factual, than I…. It does piss me off, though, to have to watch these idiots go through their contortions, trying to refute the obvious danger that the changes reported by the scientists pose for us as a species, along with all the other species with whom we share the air we breathe… It pisses me of a lot, because they make it harder to get anything done about it, and muddy up the waters made clear by the report, never realizing that by insisting on the truth of their delusions, they are signing their own death warrant….

Rather than bore you with another rant (which, it seems from looking at this small intro, I seem to have already done….) I’ll turn to my old-school format, and bring the point home with a group of pearls…. once again highlighting the advantage to pearls of virtual wisdom, requiring much less effort to acquire than the mundane, standard types of wisdom, which ask us to display intelligence, patience, and perseverance in order to feel the boon of its presence…. Easy money, as they say downtown….

“The radical novelty in modern science lies precisely in the rejection of the belief, which is at the heart of all popular religion, that the forces which move the stars and atoms are contingent upon the preferences of the human heart.” — Walter Lippmann

“These are the pale deaths which men miscall their lives; for all the scents of green things growing, each breath is but an exhalation of the grave. Bodies jerk like puppet corpses, and hell walks laughing” — Smart Bee

“Belief is the death of intelligence.” — Robert Anton Wilson

“Reality is when it happens to you.” — Smart Bee

“Are people more important than the grizzly bear? Only from the point of view of some people.” — Edward Abbey

`Just the place for a Snark!’ the Bellman cried,
As he landed his crew with care;
Supporting each man on the top of the tide
By a finger entwined in his hair.

‘Just the place for a Snark! I have said it twice:
That alone should encourage the crew.
Just the place for a Snark! I have said it thrice:
What I tell you three times is true.’

— Lewis Carroll, the Snark and the Boojum

“Ignorance is not bliss — it’s oblivion.” — Phillip Wylie
_____________________________

À Bas Ben AdhemMy fellow man I do not care for.
I often ask me, What’s he there for?
The only answer I can find
Is, Reproduction of his kind.
If I’m supposed to swallow that,
Winnetka is my habitat.
Isn’t it time to carve Hic Jacet
Above that Reproduction racket?

To make the matter more succint:
Suppose my fellow man extinct.
Why, who would not approve the plan
Save possibly my fellow man?
Yet with a politician’s voice
He names himself as Nature’s choice.

The finest of the human race
Are bad in figure, worse in face.
Yet just because they have two legs
And come from storks instead of eggs
They count the spacious firmament
As something to be charged and sent.

Though man created cross-town traffic,
The Daily Mirror, News and Graphic,
The pastoral fight and fighting pastor,
And Queen Marie and Lady Astor,
He hails himself with drum and fife
And bullies lower forms of life.

Not that I think much depends
On how we treat our feathered friends,
Or hold the wrinkled elephant
A nobler creature than my aunt.
It’s simply that I’m sure I can
Get on without my fellow man.

~~ Ogden Nash ~~

_____________________________

“A people who expect to be ignorant and free expect what never will, and never can, be.” — Thomas Jefferson

I almost used this as a closing remark to the rant/pearl in section one; it’s almost the right sentiment, but, didn’t quite hit the exact mark, so I’m using it here, as the opening remark for another old-school entry. Yes, it’s being a little bit lazy, but, I will reference my point above re: retirement, and the perks thereof, to wit: I don’t care if it’s lazy, it’s what I want to do, and you can’t stop me, at least, not without the risk of injury, to one or both of us…. Since neither of us is willing to see what happens in that case, let’s get on with this…. The primary search parameter for this pearl is “Risk analysis of using ignorance as a survival tool in modern society.” Or, something like that….

“Thank you, Señor MacGyver.” “Don’t thank me, thank the gravitational pull of Earth’s moon.” — from The Simpsons

“Does history record any case where the majority was right?” — Robert Heinlein, Notebooks of Lazarus Long

“A “sucking chest wound” is nature’s way of telling you to slow down.” — Murphy’s Military Laws, #12

“The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than the fact that a drunken man is happier than a sober one. The happiness of credulity is a cheap and dangerous quality.” — George Bernard Shaw

“Far more crucial than what we know or do not know is what we do not want to know.” — Eric Hoffer

Hmm…. how did that get there? Or, more accurately, how did we get here? This comes close to what I was looking for, but, something isn’t quite right…. we’ll go on, find two more that will shore up the weak side, and bring home the point we’re trying to make….

“I used to get high on life but lately I’ve built up a resistance. — Steven Wright”

“From stupidity there is always something to be learned, but it’s always the same thing: don’t be stupid.” — Robert M. Adams

There… that should do it…. sometimes the thread that ties it all together is thin, and hard to see, but, it generally works out okay…. in the case of this pearl, the wisdom is inherently obvious, unless one regularly fails in the task implied in the final entry…. 😆
_____________________________

Well, that was fun! I don’t know how it will look to others, but, it matters little now, because the road became the journey, and I feel centered…. Hmm… Murphy must be lurking about…. I’d best go proof while I can….. I was right, (write?…), Murphy was hanging about…. That took what seemed like forever to get all the spots I got lazy with my typing… comes from it coming out so fast and smooth, I guess, I had to sit for too long to keep up… Okay, no whining, I’m done now anyway…. and, I’m outta here…. Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you….

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.gigoid

Yet another display of consistently obscene pathology….

Posted on August 6, 2013 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

I suppose it all comes down to whether or not one is willing to put up with the universe’s demands upon our time and energy, when deciding which of the many different types of cereal to have for breakfast. I mean, there’ the question of sugar versus aspertane; the question of rolled oats versus wheat or corn flakes, the question of puffs versus flakes, or the whole concept of cut-up fruit, and other accessories to the breakfast experience. And, then, just when you’ve decided on one thing or another, they ask you whether you want home fries or hash browns with that!…..

Life is hard, isn’t it? Decisions await the application of our will around every corner, every hour of the day; we can never really get away from the need for making hard decisions in life. Trying to do so only causes further difficulties, as Murphy has an entire department of imps just waiting to help us make decisions in life that are guaranteed to drive us insane, by feeding us false, or erroneous data about what we have to decide, thereby ensuring we make the wrong decision, thus, affording him and his minions hours of free entertainment, as we gnash our teeth and wail out our complaints to an uncaring universe….

Me, I stick to coffee in the mornings, leaving the decision-making to other folks to enjoy. I refuse to give Murphy the opportunity for any more free shots at me than he already takes. If I want to eat, I stick to pastries, or other stuff that won’t cause a big mess in the kitchen. That room is too full of too many dangerous objects; knives with sharp edges, fire, heavy pots, scalding hot liquids…. No, thanks, I’ll pass on all that in the morning, in lieu of making weekly trips to the emergency room to deal with Murphy’s latest version of what he thinks is funny, which, naturally, frequently causes me to leak one kind of body fluid or another…. another image I probably could have skipped using…. SIGH…. Oh, well, I can’t be responsible for the state of people’s stomachs ALL the time…..

Hmm…. compared to what generally passes for an intro in the mornings around here, this is pretty mild, and actually somewhat engaging, if you have any interest at all in breakfast cereals…. If not exactly your cup of tea, well, we’re serving coffee, over there in the corner, where Murphy and the gang are, of course, taking advantage of my hospitality by hogging all the condiments; you’re free to join them, at your own risk, naturally. He’s already had his way with me today, so he’ll be glad of the company. Me, I’m going to go pearling, as if it were the most natural thing in the world…..

Shall we Pearl?…..
_____________________________

Yesterday, Smart Bee was a bit off center at times, but, with good grace, and a willing heart, it managed to get me what I needed, and threw in a few extras for today’s post, which I dutifully saved, recognizing them as the lustrous gems they were…. I’ll now go search out a few more, to fill out the dimensions for a proper indictment of the beloved ruling class, and the panorama of human folly we call “politics”, which, as, I believe, Ambrose Bierce pointed out, is a combination word, coming from “poly” meaning “many”, and “tics” meaning “blood sucking insects”….. a perfect description of the general run of that sport’s participants….

“Democracy is the theory that the common people know what they want, and deserve to get it good and hard.” — H.L. Mencken, “Little Book in C major”, 1916

“Can there be a republic that does not slump under the weight of so much human desire?” — Michael Scully

“Beyond a critical point within a finite space, freedom diminishes as numbers increase. . . . the human question is not how many can possibly survive within the system, but what kind of existence is possible for those who do survive.” — Frank Herbert, Dune

“‘Tis better to be alone than in the company of fools.” — Bobby Matherne, American Philosopher (1940-)

“I had too much to dream last night.” — Electric Prunes

“In our society, the Republicans set out to prove that the Democrats can not be trusted to run the government. And the Democrats set out to prove that the Republicans can not be trusted to run our government. The real problem here is that both the Democrats and the Republicans have come up with something which is absolutely true and perfectly correct. This means that the people get to pull some sort of horrible trick on themselves and live with their choice for four years.” — Smart Bee

“Now I’m concentrating on a specific tank battle toward the end of World War II!” — Zippy the Pinhead

Okay, silly, I know…. but, look closely, and you’ll see how true all of them really are, when compared to reality…. Here, if it’s that big a deal for y’all…. here is a final word, that pretty much says it all… but, without the buffer of humor….

“…when all government… in little as in great things, shall be drawn to Washington as the centre of all power, it will render powerless the checks provided of one government on another and will become as venal and oppressive as the government from which we separated.” — Thomas Jefferson, 1821
_____________________________

Poetry is sometimes so powerful, it only takes a few meager lines to impart an incredible amount of inspiration, wisdom, and beauty….. Emily was a master of this principle….

Because I could not stop for Death —
He kindly stopped for me —
The carriage held but just ourselves
And immortality.

~~ Emily Dickinson ~~

“We have art that we do not die of the truth.” — Friedrich Nietzsche (1844-1900)
_____________________________

I’m still feeling a bit silly, so I’m going to give in to the impulse to let that out into the light of day, and go with another old school pearl, this one gathered with the idea of ‘smiling’ in mind…. Let’s see what SB has to say on the subject…..

“We should consider every day lost on which we have not danced at least once. And we should call every truth false which was not accompanied by at least one laugh.” — Nietzsche, Friedrich Wilhelm (1844-1900)

“Cats seem to go on the principle that it never does any harm to ask for what you want.” — Joseph Wood Krutch

“If everything seems to be going well, you have obviously overlooked something.” — Murphy’s Eighth Law

“OH, STOP YOUR WHINING!” — Smart Bee
(ref: Peruaosophy, Axiom #6, to wit: Axiom #2 X axiom #5 = And God so loved the world, He said, “Quit whining!”)

* Greatest number of citizens who have actually boarded a UFO
* Many newspapers feature “JUMBLE”
* Hourly motel rates
* Vast majority of Elvis movies made here
* Didn’t just give up right away during World War II like some countries we could mention
* Goatees & Van Dykes thought to be worn only by weenies
* Our well-behaved golf professionals
* Fabulous babes coast to coast

— David Letterman’s “Things we can be proud of as Americans”

“The ability to delude yourself may be an important survival tool. — Jane Wagner”

“A day without a laugh is a day wasted.” — E.E. Cummings
_____________________________

I love it when a plan, etc…… Due to time constraints imposed upon me by the BBR, (Big Blue Room, for those with memory impairment issues….), I had to sort of rush through this morning’s post… Sometimes that affects the quality, or, at least, the format that is employed in creating the pearl. Today, I think it went well, so, let’s see….

Yes, yes, this pleases cute owl! Well, it pleases me, anyway, and that’s all that counts in the ultimate sense. Cute owl is only here as a hired consultant…. Now that I have demonstrably gone completely around the bend, I’ll leave you to treat your wounds in peace…. Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you….

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Some folks never do understand fractions….

Posted on August 5, 2013 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

Destroy his fib or sophistry–in vain!
The creature ‘s at his dirty work again.

— Alexander Pope (1688-1744) — Epistle to Dr. Arbuthnot, Prologue to the Satires, Line 91

Aye, he is, indeed. Up, that is, and at his dirty work, again…. Well, I am, anyway, even if the creature isn’t quite awake yet…. Actually, it’s a good sign, being up early, considering how early I fell asleep. I felt like a little kid, falling asleep before dark, afraid I was going to miss something. I didn’t, though, so it was okay to fall out that early, as I had already done everything there was to do, up to, and including, dinner with my lady. Eating well, good company, and a double shot of Jack will put me under every time, especially now that I’m old and frail….

Hah! Caught ya! Old and frail, indeed…. While I must admit that I am old, and I do get tired pretty fast these days, I don’t think I’m quite ready to join the Geezer Society, or to become a member of the “let’s go sit down for that” group of senior citizens, who never get out to do anything, spending their time rocking on the porch, watching the world go by…. Thanks, but I’d rather be part of the parade marching past, even if I must limp, and, even if it means getting tired all the time, eh? Fatigue is a small price to pay, for not turning into a slug…. Besides, as a slug, you’ve got to always be on the lookout for salt….

I should know better than to start writing before I drink some of my coffee…. I AM up early again, at 0500, but, since I fell out at 8:30 last night, that is quite enough sleep, and I’ve got no worries there…. But, the content of anything that streams out of my pre-caffeinated brain is suspect, at the very least, and, potentially, toxic, at the worst. This, I think, falls in between, and isn’t dangerous, by any means….. But, then, neither is it particularly interesting, or gut-bustingly funny, and it certainly isn’t going to make anyone run out and wake up the Pulitzer Committee members…. Hell, it may not even hold anyone’s interest as far as this paragraph, and that is sad, indeed….

I must try to overcome my sadness, though, and go on…. nothing else would be honorable. Okay, well, you’re right, it doesn’t have anything to do with honor, but, I’m human, and I, too, occasionally fall prey to those human foibles, of making things up, or more plainly, lying to suit my own purposes, in this case, just getting on with it…. This lie, intended to speed things along, like the lies our beloved leaders tell us, aren’t BAD lies, they’re little white lies, and won’t hurt anyone…. right? Right? Lying CAN be a good thing, yes?….

Well, no, it can’t…. It isn’t really a good idea, even to spare someone’s feelings…. The truth, painful as it can sometimes be, is always best. We tend to forget that, because we sometimes wish we hadn’t known the truth…. But, knowing the truth, unpalatable as it may be, will never poison us, whereas lies will cause us toxic pain, one way or another, every time they are used, either as a passive recipient, or as a guilty perpetrator….. We all hate the fact that pain is our best teacher, but, we all know it is true, which is the source of the old adage about “sometimes, you have to be cruel to be kind”, one we all acknowledge as truth, though we don’t always like it….

There I go again, ranting in the intro section…. SIGH…. I wish I could get a solid handle on this stuff; it’s getting a bit frustrating….. Though, that, of course, totally ignores the fact that I do it to myself…. Ah well, I guess we’re all Bozos on this bus, so, I may as well let my humongous proboscis do its thing, and honk away…. meanwhile….

Shall we Pearl?…..
_____________________________

“King Arthur and his armored goons of the Round Table functioned as the Politburo of a slave state: Camelot. Of all who have written on the Matter of Arthur, from Malory to White, only Mark Twain understood this. But Mark Twain was a great writer.” — Edward Abbey

Which means, by implication, all the others were not good writers….. I happen to agree with this assessment, but, then, I’m curmudgeon by nature, and by training, so accepting an unpopular truth comes easy to me. It’s unpopular because all those other authors have agents, too, and hate to see their charges maligned, even posthumously.

Then, there is also the fact that the lies, of which the history of any historical period are comprised, are considered to be the truth of the matter, as decided by the ruling faction at the time, and with the approval of the priestly hierarchies…. Historical writings are notorious for being colored by the wishes and desires of the church leaders and kings of the periods in question; an adage commonly held by all ages is, “history is written by the winners….”

This is not supposition, by the way…. This is a proven historical fact, and one that, though everyone seems to know it, and accept it, nobody seems to want to do anything about it. Not only that, but, our modern leaders, in both the governments, and, the churches, lie to us on a daily basis, and nobody seems to care about that, either….

It’s as if over half the human race just gives up all hope of understanding the universe, or having any overt personal control over their own lives, and gives up their right to make up their own minds to those in authority, allowing them to do all their thinking for them, and accepting whatever lies they choose to tell, implicitly….. It quite simply makes me crazy….

Those in power KNOW this, of course, and encourage it shamelessly…. The church leaders all preach tolerance, and submission to temporal authority, while at the same time accepting the kickbacks and privileges afforded them by their sanctified status, with no taxes, and all the other perks that go along with being a church.

The government leaders are more obvious in their machinations, but still are allowed to lie, and cheat, and steal, right out in the open, with the full approval of those who elect them…. Until, of course, someone points out the immorality or unethical nature of something, then there is a huge outcry, and some other idiot with a glib tongue is shoved into the limelight, in favor of the liar who got caught… which, in our culture, is the ultimate crime…

Yep…. killing, stealing, violence, lying, all are socially acceptable activities, provided one does not commit the ultimate crime of getting caught doing any of it…. Our culture REWARDS this kind of behavior, with laws that protect anyone who lives within its parameters.

We have, on the books, laws that allow for discrimination, cheating others, and/or outright violence, provided one a) has a legally approved reason (i.e., government or societal sanction, such as for the police entitlements, or, such as “stand your ground” laws, or, most egregiously, laws stating that corporations are “persons”….), or b) doesn’t get caught doing it…. According to the law, if no one saw you do it, it didn’t get done…. I guess that makes sense, in an unreal sort of way…. It sure doesn’t account for reality very well, though….

Okay, I’m done ranting for now…. I rant and rave about this stuff regularly, but, very seldom does it have any real effect out in the real world, which sort of puts it in the “useless wind” category of literature. Maybe someday, someone will listen, or read it, and get a clue, and spread it around a little wider….

It would be, in my estimation, a very good thing for a lot of people to know this stuff, because, believe me, none of your teachers, or preachers, or politicians, or policemen, are ever going to tell you any of this stuff, for the simple reason that they would rather you didn’t know, and would prefer that you didn’t even think about this kind of thing…. They’re better off when you don’t….

Me, I say, fuck ’em…. I prefer to live in Reality, as it exists, to “tell the truth, and shame the Devil,” as much as I possibly can…. the Devil being defined as that part of humanity that lies to the rest of us…. Maybe I’ll just call it The Asshole Syndrome, and let it go at that…. In conclusion, I have only these comments….

“Beware of the half truth. You may have gotten hold of the wrong half.” — Smart Bee

“Who cannot give good counsel? ‘T is cheap, it costs them nothing.” — Robert Burton (1577-1640) — The Anatomy of Melancholy, Part ii, Sect. 2, Memb. 3

“If voting could change the system it would be illegal. If not voting could change the system it would be illegal.” — Schroedinger’s Cat

“Forbid a man to think for himself or to act for himself and you may add the joy of piracy and the zest of smuggling to his life.” — Elbert Hubbard

“A man is never more truthful than when he acknowledges himself a liar.” — Mark Twain

“Consequences, Schmonsequences, as long as I’m rich.” — Daffy Duck, from Looney Tunes Ali Baba Bunny (1957, Chuck Jones)

And, of course, the kicker….

“History is a pack of lies about events that never happened told by people who weren’t there.” — George Santayana
_____________________________

What better way to show how the subject of the above rant has affected society, than to exhibit a poet who rejected the lies he heard, and insisted on describing reality the way he saw it, much to the chagrin of the powers that be…..

Cultural Exchange

In the Quarter of the Negroes
Where the doors are doors of paper
Dust of dingy atoms
Blows a scratchy sound.
Amorphous jack-o’-Lanterns caper
And the wind won’t wait for midnight
For fun to blow doors down.
By the river and the railroad
With fluid far-off going
Boundaries bind unbinding
A whirl of whistles blowing.
No trains or steamboats going–
Yet Leontyne’s unpacking.

In the Quarter of the Negroes
Where the doorknob lets in Lieder
More than German ever bore,
Her yesterday past grandpa–
Not of her own doing–
In a pot of collard greens
Is gently stewing.

Pushcarts fold and unfold
In a supermarket sea.
And we better find out, mama,
Where is the colored laundromat
Since we move dup to Mount Vernon.

In the pot behind the paper doors
on the old iron stove what’s cooking?
What’s smelling, Leontyne?
Lieder, lovely Lieder
And a leaf of collard green.
Lovely Lieder, Leontyne.

You know, right at Christmas
They asked me if my blackness,
Would it rub off?
I said, Ask your mama.

Dreams and nightmares!
Nightmares, dreams, oh!
Dreaming that the Negroes
Of the South have taken over–
Voted all the Dixiecrats
Right out of power–

Comes the COLORED HOUR:
Martin Luther King is Governor of Georgia,
Dr. Rufus Clement his Chief Adviser,
A. Philip Randolph the High Grand Worthy.
In white pillared mansions
Sitting on their wide verandas,
Wealthy Negroes have white servants,
White sharecroppers work the black plantations,
And colored children have white mammies:
Mammy Faubus
Mammy Eastland
Mammy Wallace
Dear, dear darling old white mammies–
Sometimes even buried with our family.
Dear old
Mammy Faubus!

Culture, they say, is a two-way street:
Hand me my mint julep, mammny.
Hurry up!
Make haste!

~~ Langston Hughes ~~

_____________________________

“That’s the difference between me and the rest of the world! Happiness isn’t good enough for me! I demand euphoria!” — Calvin & Hobbes (Bill Watterson)

Now, THAT’S what I’m talking about! This is an excellent approach to living life, as it deserves to be lived (whew, almost said “should”….see yesterday’s Pearl….), one that provides a lot of good insulation against the lies and general run of bad stuff life can bring…. Well, maybe not QUITE that excellent, but, it does show a good, strong, positive ego, with all the chutzpah Calvin will ever need to get by…

Actually, I just like it, because it’s typical Calvin, and, as such, is a contains many sharp metaphors for society at large… I know, sometimes my imagination takes me right up to the edge of sanity, and peers over to view the long fall, fearlessly…. It’s the only way I can do that without suffering vertigo….

Any who, I’m feeling a bit silly, and since my own writing currently seems unequal to the task of being achingly funny, I’ll leave it to Smart Bee to find some mild hilarity for me…. I depend heavily on SB these days, and, so what? What’s it to ya? You don’t like that? Are you talkin’ to ME?….. Pardon me, while I do a Bob Hoskins in Good Fellows on you……

No, so, anyway, the following will be a randomly chosen pearl, with only a vague concept in mind, a vision of a big, goofy-looking face bearing a huge smile, and a mirthful, yet vacuous expression…. Strait, sparse little spikes of red hair on his cone-shaped head, sky-blue eyes, and a scruffy, unshaven, sparse beard…. big, ruffly clown collar…. you got the picture? Okay, let’s pearl….

“When I met th’POPE back in ’58, I scrubbed him with a MILD SOAP or DETERGENT for 15 minutes. He seemed to enjoy it..” — Zippy the Pinhead

“We ain’t got hold of culture yet, but when we do get hold of her, we will adjust her and settler her down and make her hum and run like crazy.” — Smart Bee

“If there were no God, it would be necessary to invent him.” — Voltaire (1694-1778) — Epitre a l’Auteur du Livre des Trois Imposteurs, cxi

“Remember what the dormouse said… FEED YOUR HEAD…” — Grace Slick

“You boys lookin’ for trouble?” “Sure. Whaddya got?” — Marlon Brando, “The Wild Ones”

“You can’t fall off the floor.” — Paul’s Law “It takes children three years to learn Paul’s Law.” — Chapman’s Commentary on Paul’s Law

“It don’t mean a THING if you ain’t got that SWING!!” — Zippy the Pinhead
_____________________________

If you believe that I have crossed any lines, or used an excessive number of Zippy quotes (Thanks, Bill….), you are free to file a complaint with the Board of Outraged Citizens; I think you can get the form online now…. Let’s see how it came out, in toto….

Well, it’s certainly long enough, and has its moments, so, we’ll let it fly…. I suppose they can’t all be masterpieces, but, though this makes it partway there, (it DOES have rants, and pearls, and good poetry….), it’s just not worthy of that sobriquet, and, I have to admit it would be nice to see ONE of them achieve that exalted status…. SIGH…. Frustrated ambition is the pits…. I guess I’ll give it up, and save myself the angst for something more accessible…

Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you….

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Remnants of hauntingly bad melodies….

Posted on July 31, 2013 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

I believe I’m suffering a universal page fault in my brain…. I’m not entirely sure exactly what that is, but, I know when I see it on my computer screen, it’s a bad thing, and that’s what we have here, for sure and for certain….. a bad thing. Not unusual, not surprising, but bad…. Still, my heart beats in my chest, and my breath continues to go in and out of my lungs, so, I suppose I’d best get on with this….

I’m burnt…. baked, fried, sautéed, grilled, whichever method you choose, I’m way overdone….. I know it. The symptoms have been obvious for days now, but, I’ve been unwilling to admit it, or them, because I don’t know what I’ll do if I can’t write…. Talk about diffuse anxiety! This is more of a specific anxiety, actually, one that strikes every time I suffer one of these burn-out periods…. Not only is my brain having a hard time deciding what to write about (which, if you stop to think about it, is nothing new….), but, actively resists making the choice, knowing that it will have to try to fulfill whatever it is I’ve come up with, one way or another… Of late, it seems to have been more another, than it has been one way…

Whatever THAT means…. I guess my vaulting ambition, to write more and better, has finally reached an end point, and my creativity, such as it is, is in active rebellion, at having to come up with yet another set of outstanding verses and/or phrases, to whet your appetite for more…. I am having a hard time finding the angst and outrage I need to rant, and my sleep patterns are getting so regular, my brain is getting fuzzy from sleeping so much (which really is NOT a complaint, just an observation…. better to sleep too much than too little, for sure….) In the past nearly three years, I’ve written so much that I may have inadvertently emptied out my bucket of creative ideas, before it has had a chance to refill from the well…..

This blankness in my head obviously doesn’t stop me from writing about nothing much; that seems to have been a skill I’ve perfected, or at least, gotten adept at using…. observe, if you will, these three-plus paragraphs of meandering blather, which has just poured out, once the subject, or, in this case, the lack thereof, was decided upon. I don’t seem to have a problem writing, once I know what I’m writing about…. it’s the figuring out part that is getting harder all the time. I’ve used, and re-used, and used again, every subject known to man, and a few he’d rather forget. My ranting seems to be getting to the point where everything I write sounds familiar, with good reason, as I’ve said it all before….

This is why you’ve seen more old-school pearls lately…. Old-school pearls, by the nature of their construction process, are always relatively fresh. The subjects chosen are often self-directed, in that I have no plan ahead of time about which quotes I will choose, only a vague idea of an area of study to head for, in a general way. The software program I use, Smart Bee, is random enough that every time is different, and the only difficult part is not repeating oneself in terms of those quotes that are chosen, which is fairly simple for someone with a good memory, such as myself…. In essence, pearls of virtual wisdom are easy money, for a writer; the process resembles walking down the beach and picking out the prettiest sea shells to take home….

Ah well, another intro spent wandering around the back corridors of my mind, looking at the artwork and wondering at the massive spaces filled with nothing much…. much like these paragraphs…. I’m not sure what I’m going to do about my burn-out, but, it is all moot, because my internet service company has gone belly up, thanks to one of the telecom giants hogging resources (long story), and I’ll be losing my internet service at home for a time…. I’m not sure if I will keep posting daily, or not…. we’ll have to see. But, if you don’t see a post for several days, hang in there, I will return eventually… It may not be until after my upcoming move to another house, but, I will be back, hopefully with new resolve, and new material….

Shall we Pearl, while we can?…..
_____________________________

Random, old-school, harlequin pearl…. the best kind….

“The day is the same length as anything that is the same length as it.” — Lewis Carroll

And taste
The melancholy joy of evils past:
For he who much has suffer’d, much will know.

— Alexander Pope (1688-1744) — The Odyssey of Homer, Book xv, Line 434

“We find it hard to believe that other people’s thoughts are as silly as our own.” — James Harvey Robinson

HUMAN — The human being either evolved from the biologically very similar ape, or was created along with the rest of the world in a six-day creative spurt by an anonymous god. The human body is a wonderful thing. Well, most of them are. Humans have one mouth and a limited number of genitals, which is probably just as well. — Daniel Bowen’s TOXIC CUSTARPEDIA

“Intelligence has much less practical application than you’d think.” — Scott Adams, Dilbert.

“Nothing can be created from nothing.” Lucretius (55 BC)

“A man that should call everything by its right name would hardly pass the streets without being knocked down as a Common Enemy.” — Lord Halifax

As advertised, the best kind…. It took a bit longer than I planned on, but, this came out very well, and, to my way of looking at things, it even came out less obscure than is commonly true… Well, it’s clear to me, anyway, and hopefully, if you let it percolate, it will become clear to you as well…. If not, well, hmm… too bad?…..
_____________________________

“Universe: All-purpose poem.” — Ray Hand

A Thing of Beauty (Endymion)

A thing of beauty is a joy for ever:
Its lovliness increases; it will never
Pass into nothingness; but still will keep
A bower quiet for us, and a sleep
Full of sweet dreams, and health, and quiet breathing.
Therefore, on every morrow, are we wreathing
A flowery band to bind us to the earth,
Spite of despondence, of the inhuman dearth
Of noble natures, of the gloomy days,
Of all the unhealthy and o’er-darkn’d ways
Made for our searching: yes, in spite of all,
Some shape of beauty moves away the pall
From our dark spirits. Such the sun, the moon,
Trees old and young, sprouting a shady boon
For simple sheep; and such are daffodils
With the green world they live in; and clear rills
That for themselves a cooling covert make
‘Gainst the hot season; the mid-forest brake,
Rich with a sprinkling of fair musk-rose blooms:
And such too is the grandeur of the dooms
We have imagined for the mighty dead;
An endless fountain of immortal drink,
Pouring unto us from the heaven’s brink.

~~ John Keats ~~

_____________________________

I figure, since I’m being somewhat obfuscatory today, I’d cheat a little, and go with an old school pearl from the archives…. this one is from the old days, when I was still employed by the State of California, and sent these morning pearls out to about 300 or so of my peers, for their daily, morning dose of reality, right there in their inbox each day…. This one is apparently from somewhere around 2008….

Out of the East…

Ffolkes,

“Interesting” is only the beginning. As humans, we tend to get bored when not stimulated by a challenge of some sort. If the world does not provide one, we are perfectly okay with making it up. Something about the perversity of human nature, I suppose, though it seems a bit dramatic to me. Ah well, our’s is not to reason why, etc., except it is, or should be, do and die, not do or die. Cuz that’s what is at the end of the road for all of us. Kinda puts us on the same playing field, eh? Here…. I’m feeling less than Occidental this morning……

“Character is doing the right thing when nobody’s looking.There are too many people who think that the only thing that’s right is to get by, and the only thing that’s wrong is to get caught.” — J. C. Watts

Always we hope
Someone else has the answer
Some other place will be better
Some other time it will all work out.
This is it.
No one else has the answer
No other place will be better
And it has already turned out.
At the center of your being
You have the answer;
You know who you are and what you want.
There is no need to turn outside
For better seeing.
Rather abide at the center of your being
For the more you leave it
The less you learn.
Search your own heart and see
the way to do is to be.
— Lao Tzu

Y’all take care out there…..
_____________________________

Considering the relative rush job this Pearl constitutes, I’m impressed. It’s a bit choppy, but hangs together pretty well, for something I cobbled together in about 90 minutes time. What I related regarding my internet connection was truth, so this may be my last post, until I figure out what I’ll do about service, since I’ll be moving in about 31 days… oh, joy…. Any who, for now, this will do, even if not Pulitzer material…. Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you….

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Precious memories of bizarre telegrams….

Posted on July 27, 2013 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

I’m a little confused, and though that isn’t anything new and different, it is unusual in the sense that I don’t often get this way without good reason. The reason today has to do with how yesterday’s Pearl came out, and how it was apparently received by readers….. As I’ve stated, the number of Likes I receive isn’t important to me, as long as I know I’ve written a good Pearl, because this is therapy for me, not connected to how well it goes over, just how well I feel about the content, and how getting it out of my head has helped…. No, I just don’t get the patterns that statistics show about site usage, and what those show about the number of visitors and readers….

The two short little blurb blogs I wrote day before yesterday, and the day before that, which were just short pieces explaining that I wouldn’t be writing those days, both got way more readers, and Likes, than yesterday’s massive effort, wherein I wrote over 3000 words, all tearing my heart out, to rant against some of my favorite targets, and produce a new, fresh poem, one I thought was quite good….It is possibly the best Pearl I’ve written in over a year, yet, only four readers stopped by to peruse it in the first 24 hours it was up, at least, according to the Likes…. Not that I blame Murphy, or anything like that…. of course not….

SIGH…. Oh well, I guess I’ll never understand how it works, and I’m not going to lose any sleep over it, that’s for sure…. Three of the four who stopped in, Willow, Ashi Akira, and Lou, are perhaps the most regular of my readers, as well as three of my favorite blogs to read, and it’s always nice to see them, so I do appreciate that…

Today’s effort is liable to be of lesser degree, at least of quantity; keeping high quality will remain as a priority. Of course, that doesn’t factor in the Murphological aspects of the morning, which have yet to be revealed to me; I’m sure he has something planned to screw with me, but, so far, he’s holding back on it, letting the anticipation build, and trying to get me to let down my guard…. Little does he know that my guard, in respect to his assholishness, is never let down, as I’ve had too many examples of what happens when I let it get sloppy….. Of course, he wins anyway, but, I’m always ready for it….

Hmm…. Spell Checker doesn’t seem to like the words I’m making up today, but, that’s okay, I don’t much like it, either…. It’s often wrong, and has no sense of humor at all…. Besides, I like the words I made up, so, it will just have to deal with it…. I don’t give a shit about what Murphy himself thinks about them; his actions toward me, and everyone else, over the years has earned him NONE of my respect, and he’ll just have to learn to live without it, for he’ll never have it….. Any more than a God would have it, as long as they claim to be responsible for the mess they’ve created and left us sitting in here….. Sorry, didn’t mean to slip up in the intro….. I’ll save the ranting for later, if needed…..

I’ve once again managed to blather my way through five or six paragraphs of sheer twaddle; if I didn’t know better, I’d think this was getting easier…. But, that is an illusion, I know, one that is designed to lure me in and lull me into a false sense of security, before once again dumping me into a situation with no clear resolution to be seen…. You see, I do know Murphy!…. He’s out there, just waiting for me to relax, then, POW!…. Right upside the head…. We’ll go on now, but, keep your eyes and ears open, ffolkes, it could get ugly today….

Shall we Pearl?…..
_____________________________

I ranted so long yesterday, there isn’t much left in there today that is worth bringing out for discussion…. Besides, I did manage to say most of what I had to say, so repeating it today would be silly, not to mention boring…. So, we’ll go old-school, and let Smart Bee pick out some fine little gems for our consideration, and see what they have to tell us today…..

“After the lawyers are all dead, kill the Politicians!” — Smart Bee

This is perhaps the best summation possible of what I ranted yesterday in this section; short, sweet, and to the point. It does overlook, however, a simple point, and that is, if you kill all the lawyers, you will already have eliminated the politicians, as practically all of them are lawyers, anyway…. Shoot all the lawyers, and there won’t be many politicians left to target…. Sorry, couldn’t resist, after yesterday’s rant…. Okay, now we’ll let SB pick ’em, and see what’s what….

“The field cannot well be seen from within the field” — Emerson

“It is inaccurate to say that I hate everything. I am strongly in favor of common sense, common honesty, and common decency. This makes me forever ineligible for public office.” — H.L. Mencken

“A good question is never answered. It is not a bolt to be tightened into place but a seed to be planted and to bear more seed toward the hope of greening the landscape of idea.” — John Ciardi

“The rancher strings barbed wire across the range, drills wells and bulldozes stock ponds everywhere, drives off the elk and antelope and bighorn sheep, poisons coyotes and prairie dogs, shoots eagle and bear and cougar on sight, supplants the native bluestem and grama grass with tumbleweed, cow shit, cheat grass, snakeweed, anthills, poverty weed, mud and dust and flies–and then leans back and smiles broadly at the Tee Vee cameras and tells us how much he loves the West.” — Edward Abbey

“Ideals are like stars: you will not succeed in touching them with your hands, but like the seafarer on the desert of waters, you choose them as your guides, and following them you reach your destiny.” — Carl Schurz

“If water derives lucidity from stillness, how much more the faculties of the mind! The mind of the sage, being in repose, becomes the mirror of the universe, the speculum of all creation.” — Chuang Tzu

At this point, it would be well for me to stop and point out the danger of going forward from here…. I see that SB has allowed Murphy to lay a trap for us, but, thanks to being alerted, as noted in the intro, y’all were saved from having the rest of your day ruined by an intellectual meltdown…. If we took the next step indicated by the above group of pearls, our brains would seize up, just like an old motor with no oil, and we’d be stuck in that limbo until found by neighbors and rescued, or buried and waked… So, I will apply the correct antidote here, by giving you, NOT the quote that SB, and hence, Murphy, had picked out for you, but, instead, one that my own sense of whimsy provided, instinctively…. Whew! My insurance agent would have been really pissed!….

“We place two copies of PEOPLE magazine in a DARK, HUMID mobile home. 45 minutes later CYNDI LAUPER emerges wearing a BIRD CAGE on her head!” — Zippy the Pinhead

There!… Saved by the Zip-man, again!…..
_____________________________

My body is feeling its age today…. As I noted yesterday at one point (in my head), if I were a NASCAR aficionado, I could say that “my trans axle is gettin’ a little gritty”, and everyone would know what I meant…. But, since I have no idea what that actually means, I’ll just say that my back and hips, where they join together, is experiencing some age-related stiffness today, and leave it at that…. Now, however, since I’ve again shared more than anyone could conceivably wish to know, I don’t have to explain why this poem is here today, or why it is one of my favorites….

The Little Boy And The Old Man

Said the little boy, “Sometimes I drop my spoon.”
Said the old man, “I do that too.”
The little boy whispered, “I wet my pants.”
“I do that too,” laughed the little old man.
Said the little boy, “I often cry.”
The old man nodded, “So do I.”
“But worst of all,” said the boy, “it seems
Grown-ups don’t pay attention to me.”
And he felt the warmth of a wrinkled old hand.
“I know what you mean,” said the little old man.

~~ Shel Silverstein ~~

_____________________________

There I was, muddling along, minding my own, trying to think of a rantable subject, when a random thought intruded into my consciousness…. Since it was in some foreign language I didn’t recognize, and thus do not speak, it was only mildly upsetting; if I knew what it said, it might have frightened me….. However, since I was in the vicinity, I went ahead and allowed myself to go a bit mad, and used that state of mind to go a’hunting for pearls…. Here is what I found, while the rest of my mind, apparently, was avoiding ranting….

“Philosophy, means, first, doubt; and afterwards the consciousness of what knowledge means, the consciousness of uncertainty and of ignorance, the consciousness of limit, shade, degree, possibility. The ordinary man doubts nothing and suspects nothing.” — Henri Frederick Amiel

How lov’d, how honour’d once avails thee not,
To whom related, or by whom begot;
A heap of dust alone remains of thee:
‘T is all thou art, and all the proud shall be!

— Alexander Pope (1688-1744) — To the Memory of an Unfortunate Lady, Line 71

“Pain is inevitable, suffering is optional.” — Smart Bee

“Every time history repeats itself the prices go up.” — Peter’s Observation on History

“It [the Bible] is full of interest. It has noble poetry in it; and some clever fables; and some blood-drenched history; and some good morals; and a wealth of obscenity; and upwards of a thousand lies.” — Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens) (1835-1910) — Letters from the Earth (1905-1909)

“Wherever your journey takes you, there are new gods waiting there, with divine patience – and laughter.” — Smart Bee

Okay, so whimsy can only take me so far…. I couldn’t decide which of these two gems should grace the final position for today’s final pearl, so, I’m putting both of them up, and you can use the one you like…. I did… or will, depending on your point of view….

The camel has a single hump;
The dromedary two;
Or else the other way around.
I’m never sure. Are you?

— Ogden Nash (1902-1971)

“It takes a smart man to know when he’s stupid.” — Barney Rubble, “The Flintstones”
_____________________________

“The art of being a good guest is knowing when to leave.” — Prince Philip, Duke of Edinburgh

I would suppose that someone of Prince Philip’s cache would know about good manners, having had them bred into him for several thousand generations…. along with tendencies toward being bloodthirsty, mercurial, prone to treachery, and a dozen other nasty characteristics that are common in the English aristocracy…. You could never say that the English kings were impolite when committing their chicanery; they lopped off heads with great charm and politeness, and never a harsh word…. Any who, I find the Prince’s statement a good one for ending today’s mess, such as it is…. You may have noted my reluctance to rant, after yesterday’s massive outburst… I’m afraid of what I might find in there… Let’s see how today’s journey went….

Okay, well, I like it, but, then, you know me…. always ready to give myself a break. If I don’t, who will?…. At any rate, it’s done for the day, and I can go on to finding new and better ways to laze about without purpose…. Or, I can get the laundry done…. Any bets on which one happens?…. I thought not….. Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you….

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Brains for breakfast….

Posted on July 20, 2013 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

I been yuckified! Well, not really, but, it was all I could come up with on short notice…. In any case, it gave me a chance to use the word, ‘yuckified’, a word of my own creation, (I think it’s mine, and, in truth, sincerely hope it is ….. ), meaning exactly what it sounds like…. Having thus gotten a quantity of both awkward adolescent humor, and, barely comedic, left-over silliness from childhood, out of my system, right off the bat, I can, presumably, proceed to a somewhat more adult, certainly more adroit, use of the written word to communicate, whatever it is I’m trying to get out of my head today….

The title of these missives very seldom has anything concrete to do with what I write each day; the two processes, of picking the title, and of picking a subject for the day’s effort, are completely separate, in time and intent. I boot up, type in the password, and, once all is ready, bring up the programs I use to compose with, with the picking of the title the last step in that process…. I then do other stuff until I’m ready to write (drink coffee, take pills, yawn, stretch, scratch, worship, etc….). Today, however, I must have had a precognitive episode, when the given title swam into my conscious mind, apparently looking ahead to what would follow…. brains for breakfast.

Now, as a former chef, the word brains implies a different thing than to what may come into the mind’s eye for the average, non-food industry, citizen; I see the dish I’ve only seen prepared, (no, I didn’t have the courage to actually taste it….), brains de veau aux buerre blanc, (sorry, forgot the French word for ‘brains’) whereas most other folks would probably get a replay of a zombie movie running through their head. I’m not sure who would be considered the less fortunate….

Therefore, and whereas, if you catch my drift, we’ll go on, to bigger and better things…. Sorry if I seem stuck in cliche-land, but, my use of such is actually a form of self-therapy, suggested to me by my doctor, as a ready-made form of rebellion that causes no harm, beyond the normal loss of brain cells caused by hearing anything of so ancient and mundane… without even giving a moment’s notice to the very subtle, yet destructive, attitude-shaping that is implied by the use of such simple phrases….

Take the phrase “bigger and better things”… this is presented in such a way as to imply that bigger and better is always a good thing, whereas we know the opposite is more often true in reality, or, at the very least, half the time, an assertion which is implied, and verified, by the inherently balanced, symmetrical nature of that reality…. To assume that making anything bigger is to make it better is to deny half of reality, and such attitudes have a way of coming back to haunt us…. Reality has a very powerful tendency to assert itself, especially if our attitudes are in opposition to its nature….

Some folks seem to like getting slapped by reality, though, and who am I to keep people from having fun? Besides, I’ve got other fish to fry, as I now have to turn my mind to putting together something coherent, and a bit more practical, in terms of literature, or I’ll never get done with this today…. Though I hear the muttering in the back of the audience, about “so, what’s wrong with that?”, I’ll ignore it, long enough to bring this mess to a close, and get on with today’s dive into the ocean of knowledge, searching for those gems that point the way to virtual wisdom, which, some days, is all we can hope for….

Shall we Pearl?…..
_____________________________

Okay, well, that came out okay…. let’s see what kind of damage I can do here…. I think the operative word I’ll use today is one that came to me as I began this section, one I used above to describe how I’d like what I write to be, to wit: coherent. For me, it’s quite a stretch sometimes, to maintain any sort of connection to that word, given the complexity of both what I write about, and the complexity of the way I write, and express myself…. Both of these, one might say with accuracy, assume TOO much complexity in my hands, but, it’s my blog, and I don’t HAVE to be simple if I don’t want to… Call me a curmudgeon, if you wish…. actually, PLEASE call me a curmudgeon, it’s one of my life’s ambition to be seen as one….

Okay, I’m now officially babbling, having once again gotten too involved in the writing, and forgetting what I was writing about… Coherence, that is, which I’ve obviously lost all chance at achieving in this particular section….. Probably all for the best, as it’s a tough one for me at any time, much less on demand…. Fortunately, I have a way out of this conundrum…. it’s called dropping back five yards and punting the ball, or as we call it around here, “Let’s feed it to Mikey!”…. In other words, we’ll see if Smart Bee has any aphorisms to contribute, that might point the way to finding at least a modicum of coherent thought, and if not, well, at least it will be amusing, for a short time…. we can always hope, can’t we?…..

“Love the little trade which thou hast learned, and be content therewith.” — Marcus Aurelius Antoninus (121-180 AD) — Meditations, iv, 31

“A mighty hunter, and his prey was man.” — Alexander Pope (1688-1744) — Windsor Forest, Line 61

“Spintharus, speaking in commendation of Epaminondas, says he scarce ever met with any man who knew more and spoke less.” — Plutarch (46-120 AD)
— Of Hearing, 6

A word is dead
When it is said
Some say.
I say it just
Begins to live
That day.

— Emily Dickinson

“How often we recall, with regret, that Napoleon once shot at a magazine editor and missed him and killed a publisher. But we remember with charity, that his intentions were good.” — Mark Twain

“What happens to the wide-eyed observer when the window between reality and unreality breaks and the glass begins to fly?” — Stephen King

Hush little bright line, don’t you cry
You’ll be a cliche by and by.

— Fred Allen

Sometimes, it works better than others…. this is one of those times….. This is a great pearl, so I hope you were paying attention, ffolkes….
_____________________________

It’s really okay if you didn’t pay attention…. though it’s a pretty coherent thought. At any rate, I feel like a bit more of Emily, just to keep things from becoming too normal…. Even if it’s a bit obscure, even for her, it’s a soothing poem, to my mind, and well worth the immersion…..

The cricket sang,
And set the sun,
And workmen finished, one by one,
Their seam the day upon.

The low grass loaded with the dew,
The twilight stood as strangers do
With hat in hand, polite and new,
To stay as if, or go.

A vastness, as a neighbor, came,–
A wisdom without face or name,
A peace, as hemispheres at home,–
And so the night became.

~~ Emily Dickinson ~~

_____________________________

The framers of the Constitution knew what they were doing when they tried to build in safeguards in the system of government they chose after the revolution against England. They structured it with checks to the balance of power in each section, Executive, Legislative, and Judicial, and reserving several rights to the people that had historically been reserved for the governments themselves, including the right to bear arms, one that every government in history has tried to restrict for its own use. The right to bear arms, the right to vote, the right to gather to protest, to speak freely, all these have, at one time or another through the last four or five millennia, been restricted, until men like Jefferson, Mason, and Washington took those rights for themselves, and offered the same opportunity to their descendants.

In fact, I regard it as proof of this assertion to find that the government, not only of this country, but all of them, is STILL trying to restrict the rights of the populace to bear arms. To my way of thinking, the most recent attempts by the government to curtail the public’s ability to obtain the means to protect themselves adequately merely serve to point out how accurate are statements such as the above, showing how little human nature has evolved, or advanced in the intervening years…. I’d be hard pressed to call the changes we’ve seen anything other than a retreat from achieving a more civilized society, as the populace continues to live in fear, most of which is manufactured by that very same government, to distract them from what is going on behind the scenes; for example, observe the data mining and illegal surveillance being carried on by Saint Obama and the current administration….

Sorry to apply the sarcastic epithet to the POTUS, but, his recent actions have revealed a lot of stuff that indicates that, yes, he IS a politician, and, as such, has been lying to the public on a regular basis since entering office, a habit much practiced by all those who enter those hallowed doors, as it turns out.

Historically, it seems, ever since I’ve been alive, for the last 62 years, each and every man who has been in the White House, with the possible exception of Jimmy Carter, has lied to the public on a regular basis, without qualms, and without apology…. This isn’t news, or new news, at all…. just go back over the headlines and op-ed pages over that period, and the evidence of what I have asserted is plain to see….

That is why I won’t ever consider any alterations to the second Amendment, or the First, or to any of them…. I still regard them as law, and see any attempts to restrict them as being acts of treason against the principles by which they were conceived and enacted. I DON’T trust ANY politician, not one who spends millions to get elected, even if, or especially if, the money isn’t theirs… The mere act of WANTING to be an elected official implies insanity to me, either of a sociopathic nature, or an evangelical one, either of which is dangerous to allow into any position of authority over others, as they will ALWAYS act to serve their own self-interests first….

’nuff said…. gigoid has spoken, and has no more to say on this subject, except…. Leave my Bill of Rights alone, or pay the consequences….

“Disobedience, in the eyes of anyone who has read history, is man’s original virtue. It is through disobedience that progress has been made, through disobedience and through rebellion.” — Oscar Wilde
_____________________________

Well, that’s a mellow little rant, quite polite in tone and length…. not sure what prompted it, other than what is obvious in the quote, but it’s apparently been in there a while, as it flowed out quite smoothly, for a change…. Let’s see how the whole thing holds up….. Well, it’s definitely a Pearl of Virtual Wisdom… so, off it goes, and so be it…. Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you…..

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Savory redemption meatballs saved the day….

Posted on July 19, 2013 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

Routine is important, I think, to just about everyone, whether they know it or not. Often, I think, people don’t know just how much they depend on routines to keep their lives running smoothly, which makes it harder for them to deal, when those routines suffer unpredictable changes. What any of that has to do with this morning’s blog, I haven’t a clue, but, it sounds good, doesn’t it? Kind of classy and intelligent, as if I were some Piled High and Deep (PhD) preparing to discourse on some esoteric principle, one that is only relevant to those in a small field of scholars, and which provided the subject for a thesis nobody will ever read outside the room where the degree committee reads the papers submitted by the candidates…..

That paragraph would fit right into a thesis, too, wouldn’t you say…. pompous, obsessively wordy, and all-too-sure of its own importance, just like one of the fat cats on Wall Street…. Hmm…. I don’t know where THAT vitriol came from; it’s especially harsh for me this early, even if I were leading into a rant on the BRC and the corporate assholes who pay them. Goodness knows they deserve whatever we can give them, as they are responsible for just about ALL of the misery that is still present in the world, and will ultimately doom the entire species to an ignoble death, choking on the fumes of our own folly, gasping in pain and anguish….

I suppose that’s a bit too graphic for pre-breakfast imagery, but, what can I do? Those responsible for our state don’t give a DAMN about anyone else, and aren’t going to change; unfortunately, I don’t see the masses rising up in protest, either, as most of them don’t even realize the danger, and will believe anything told to them by some guy on TV, if he’s got the right skin color, and accent. The public is well under the control of those in power over them, and can pretty much do anything they want to do, without even having to explain. They do hand out some information, but you can be sure it has nothing to do with what they are actually up to; it is only what they wish you to hear, and believe….

I’ve had a bad habit of late, of beginning my rants right here in the intro section… which is, I see, just another evolution of routine, if I look at it in a certain way. As that will fit right in with my plan for the day (oh, you didn’t think I had a plan? Hah!….), I will now look at it that way, and declare this intro invalid, as such, and rename it “section one”, thereby removing any implications as to format, or necessary information that needs to be included. It may not make things clearer, but, it will distract you, once again, from the real issue, which, given the way things look around here today, shall remain unresolved, in the words of Poe, forevermore….

Shall we Pearl?…..
_____________________________

I got up incredibly late, for me and my routine, but, it isn’t surprising, given that I was up to almost 1 AM, dealing with a friend in near-crisis mode, requiring my input and assistance…. (a discrete way of saying, helping her deal with a screwup….) It wasn’t a particularly onerous task, but, dragged out forever, as the people involved have their own sense of time, which only narrowly resembles the one the rest of us use…. The end result was that I had to stay up, waiting to complete a call to resolve the issue, before being able to go to bed, well after midnight…. So, this Pearl may be a bit of a throw-together, a patchwork pearl, so to speak, starting with this one right here, which I’m sure you’ll enjoy…. or else…. In addition, today, as a special treat, we will have the ever popular “comments in parentheses” from yours truly, just for fun….

Teach me to feel another’s woe,
To hide the fault I see;
That mercy I to others show,
That mercy show to me.

— Alexander Pope (1688-1744) — The Universal Prayer, Stanza 10
(Hard to find a better rephrasing of the Golden Rule….)

“Morality is moral only if it is voluntary.” — Lincoln Steffens
(Well, duh!…. As if there was any other way….)

“To find a fault is easy; to do better may be difficult.” — Plutarch (46 AD-120 AD)
(Huh? What does that MEAN? Oh, right…. people are selfish, and lazy, too…. got it….)

“Time, whose tooth gnaws away everything else, is powerless against truth.” — Thomas Huxley (1825-1895)
(Hmm… Sadly, time also give the unscrupulous opportunity to hide, or color, the truth, stealing some of its power, turning it to illusion….)

Ambidextrous, adj.: Able to pick with equal skill a right-hand pocket or a left. — Ambrose Bierce, “The Devil’s Dictionary”
(As is now well known, this is a primary skill for any politician, and is becoming more popular every day among the religious hierarchies….)

“Whenever people say we mustn’t be sentimental, you can take it they are about to do something cruel. And, if they add, we must be realistic, they mean they are going to make money out of it.” — Brigid Brophy
(Wow…. rare honesty, and a damn clear vision of reality, wouldn’t you say?…. How many times have you heard these ideas, either plainly, or in paraphrase, pass the lips of an elected official, just in the last week or two?… A lot of times, I’d wager….)

“The fundamental delusion of humanity is to suppose that I am here and you are there.” — Yasutani Roshi

I coming out…. of the parentheses, that is, not the closet, where I’ve never been….. The last one for this group had to be an excellent pearl, and, to my way of thinking, I nailed that in one…. This is a very deep statement, when you take the time to explore its depth; if not, it just sounds like a Zen koan, or some mystical obscurity designed to confuse reality. In truth, this is elemental, and a truth from which there is no real escape, no matter how strong our delusional belief……

We are all in this boat together, ffolkes; what I do is going to affect others, just as what they do will affect me…. We cannot exist in reality without this connection, and it would, indubitably, be a good thing if we would get a handle on that, and start living as if we planned to survive past the next century…. Otherwise, reality is going to step in, and destroy all our delusions at once, along with our existence as a species…. Sorry to be the bearer of the bad news, but the evidence is plain, even though nobody wants to talk about it…. SIGH….. Ah well, onward….
_____________________________

Sometimes, introduction is superfluous…..

Gold Mouths Cry

Gold mouths cry with the green young
certainty of the bronze boy
remembering a thousand autumns
and how a hundred thousand leaves
came sliding down his shoulder blades
persuaded by his bronze heroic reason.
We ignore the coming doom of gold
and we are glad in this bright metal season.
Even the dead laugh among the goldenrod.

The bronze boy stands kneedeep in centuries,
and never grieves,
remembering a thousand autumns,
with sunlight of a thousand years upon his lips
and his eyes gone blind with leaves.

~~ Sylvia Plath ~~

_____________________________

Yesterday was a wasted day, physically, due to overusing my body the day before, when I pretended I wasn’t disabled for a short, but, telling period of time. Today, I find that I am still, in spite of all my wishes to the contrary, old…. or, at least, older than I would like to be….. I’m missing my youthful strength, and the ability to do anything I asked of my body, without regard for the consequences for that entity…. I’m tougher now, of course; that’s what happens over time…. but, my body no longer can do what I ask without consequences, and those consequences seem to last longer than ever before; certainly much longer than is convenient….

Now that I’ve meandered through a totally unnecessary explanation of something that isn’t really important to anyone other than me, and perhaps my doctor, I can get around to sharing the whole reason for bringing this up at all…. Essentially, it’s all a lead-in, a hook, so to speak, to demonstrate the point of the exercise, which is to make a simple statement, to wit: I feel lazy today…. There, I’ve said it, and you may chastise me as you see fit….. later. Right now, I’m using this little break in routine to make that statement, which fulfills all legal requirements for notifying y’all of my intention to go old-school…. Hell, the law says I could not say anything at all, but, I’m a nice guy, mostly, so, there you go….

So, here is another old-school pearl, of the random, harlequin style we all love so well…..

Pretty! in amber to observe the forms
Of hairs, or straws, or dirt, or grubs, or worms!
The things, we know, are neither rich nor rare,
But wonder how the devil they got there.

— Alexander Pope (1688-1744) — Epistle to Dr. Arbuthnot, Prologue to the Satires, Line 169

“Nothing is so firmly believed as what we least know.” — Michael de Montaigne (1533-1592) — Essays, Book i, Chap. xxxi, Of Divine Ordinances

“To rebel against a powerful political, economic, religious, or social establishment is very dangerous and very few people do it, except, perhaps, as part of a mob. To rebel against the scientific establishment, however, is the easiest thing in the world, and anyone can do it and feel enormously brave, without risking as much as a hangnail. Thus, the vast majority, who believe in astrology and think that the planets have nothing better to do than form a code that will tell them whether tomorrow is a good day to close a business deal or not, become all the more excited and enthusiastic about the bilge when a group of astronomers denounces it.” — Isaac Asimov

“I used to sit on the banks with a raft and watch the water roll lazily by. One day I pushed my raft into the shallows of the water and found the water moved swifter than I thought, but my raft was actually a little rowboat. Then, after some time, I rowed my little boat into deeper water. There were great storms, mighty winds, tremendous waves, and sometimes I felt so alone. But I have noticed my little rowboat is now a mighty ship manned by my friends and loved ones, and beautiful calm seas, warm sunny days, and nights filled with comfortable dreams always double after a storm. Now, I could never go back and sit on the bank, in fact, I search for deeper water. Such is life when lived.” — B D Gulledge

“I have known a vast quantity of nonsense talked about bad men not looking you in the face. Don’t trust that conventional idea. Dishonesty will stare honesty out of countenance, any day in the week, if there is anything to be got by it.” — Charles Dickens

“I see in the near future a crisis approaching that unnerves me and causes me to tremble for the safety of my country…. Corporations have been enthroned, an era of corruption in high places will follow, and the money-power of the country will endeavor to prolong its reign by working upon the prejudices of the people until the wealth is aggregated in a few hands and the Republic is destroyed. — Former US President Abraham Lincoln, Nov. 21, 1864 — letter to Col. William F. Elkins — printed in “The Lincoln Encyclopedia”, — ed. Archer H. Shaw, Macmillan, 1950, NY

“There’s a tendency today to absolve individuals from moral responsibility and treat them as victims of social circumstance. You buy that, you pay with your soul. It’s not men who limit women, it’s not straights who limit gays, it’s not whites who limit blacks. What limits people is lack of character. What limits people is that they don’t have the fucking nerve or imagination to star in their own movie, let alone direct it.” — Bernard Mickey Wrangle
_____________________________

I’m feeling like the White Rabbit, so I’d best get on with this….. Well, if that won’t do it, I don’t know what will…. In that vein, and on that note, I will leave you to get on with the day….. Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you…..

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Ned Moore, aka gigoid, is a 70 year-old, (!!!… When did that happen?….), retired dilettante, who would rather read than eat, most days. His first blog, "gigoid’s folly", has been emailed out to folks he knows for about 18 years now. He still considers it his best defense against angst, and the ever-present specter of sheer insanity..... Due to rigorous curmudgeon training requirements, he has discontinued his Facebook presence, but still indulges in the occasional Twitter session... In essence, he's socialized, but, not overly sociable; all labels and stereotypes are forbidden in his presence... and he doesn't care what anyone thinks about that..... In fact, he doesn't want to talk anymore.... If you feel you MUST contact gigoid, his email address is: alphagigoid@gmail.com You can go read now.... Go on, beat it.... gigoid, the dubious

View Full Profile →

	katiemiafrederick on Are those Foster Grants to blo…
	katiemiafrederick on Funk-o-matic accessories are o…
	katiemiafrederick on Dodge those taxes with dignity…
	katiemiafrederick on Dodge those taxes with dignity…
	katiemiafrederick on But…. but…. what a…

gigoid

Exploring Consensual Reality

Tag Archives: Alexander Pope

Safely ensconced in a new/old cave…..

Save those false pretenses for the coffee cake….

We’ll have an asparagus pizza, and the Neopolitan pudding….

Put the cheeseburger down, sir, and step back from the condiments….

Yet another display of consistently obscene pathology….

Some folks never do understand fractions….

Remnants of hauntingly bad melodies….

Precious memories of bizarre telegrams….

Brains for breakfast….

Savory redemption meatballs saved the day….

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this:

Share this: