Malcolm patented the “three days dead” look….

Posted on April 3, 2014 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

I cannot claim to be perfectly awake just yet, but, it’s time to get started, so you’ll just have to take what you get in that respect, because I’ve sat here diddling my brain and twiddling my fingers for a good thirty minutes now, with no real effect in terms of either feeling alert or displaying any coherency beyond what is needed to pour coffee…. Maybe if I take a few more sips of the only reason worth living for in the morning, I’ll find a little bit of energy….. I hope so…. That paragraph sucks….

I’m finding a bit of a Catch-22 connected to the use of the medical marijuana at night to aid in sleeping….. Applying some of the topical pain relieving cream is useful before lying down, as it helps relax enough to drift to sleep…. but, waking up to apply more is counter-productive, to say the least, as the act of spreading it where it needs to go causes enough pain to wake me…. I eat a high CBD chocolate about an hour & a half before retiring, which acts on pain, with added drowsiness effect, for about 4-6 hours; I have to wake up twice, minimally, to down a Norco during the night, but the chocolate often makes it less critical until it wears off…

That is the catch, the wearing off part…. If I take enough MJ to last the night, then the Norco isn’t as critical to be on time…. but, if I don’t take the Norco, I get the dyskinesia side effect after about 6 hours, right when the MJ is wearing off…. This means, at that point, even if I take what I need, I will be awake until it takes effect, whether that is 45 minutes for a Norco, , & up to 1½ hours for edible MJ…. So, I have to balance the 6 hour MJ effects with the minimum 4 hours of Norco effectiveness, and hope they work together…. It makes it tricky to get right, but, in the whole, I get a LOT more sleep than before I started using the MJ to augment the effects of the classic style pill…

There, now the medical report is over, and I’ve bored everyone to tears with my silly little personal issues, I suppose I should get on with what I actually started to do…. to wit: write the Pearl for today…. I guess I got off on a tangent there, and fell right into Chatty Cathy mode before I noticed….. Oh well, it got us enough dross and drivel to call an intro, so, that’s something, I guess….

Shall we Pearl?…..

“Of course I have a smart ass attitude…. it’s a natural defense against drama, stupidity, and bullshit.” — Tweety Bird
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I originally intended to rant about this article, but, after perusing it myself, I find it’s only more proof of the prediction I made last week, as to how the pundits in Washington, (you know, those assholes who hang out at the White House, and in the halls of Congress), would be acting in the coming weeks, after the poTUS (Please note: the word president is NOT capitalized deliberately; sufficient respect for the office to justify capitalization must be earned….) stated his intention to “ask Congress” to reform the NSA regulations on spying…. So far, the president has mouthed his lies just as predicted, and the expected response has gone exactly according to what I said would occur…. It’s a gift…..

No, really, they’re going through ALL the contortions I figured they would, just as if they were paying attention to what I said…. which makes it, sort of, lacking in virtue to rail at them right now…. They’re being so PATHETICALLY stupid, it’s hardly worth the time it takes to run them down, and, in fact, doing so might just be considered abusing the handicapped….

So we’ll do this… Read the article, so you know just what they’re up to, silly as it may be…. Right now, they’re just doing as I said, and creating more questions and confusion around the issue of the torture report Senator DiFi and the Senate want to see, while Obama came out with some new, toothless suggestions for changes to the regulations that don’t really change much of anything…. all of which is muddying water that was already unclear….

After that, come back to this section, where you’ll find the latter half of this pears, which will consist of an old-school pearl, with the parameters set, once again, to shoot at our beloved ruling class, in all its ugly glory….

http://www.sfgate.com/news/politics/article/Demands-grow-to-release-Senate-torture-report-5369929.php

“Official truths are often powerful illusions.” — John Pilger, _Distant_Voices_, 1992

“This isn’t Anarchy, this is Chaos.” — Smart Bee

“How difficult it is to save the bark of reputation from the rocks of ignorance.” — Petrarch

MACHINATION, n. The method employed by one’s opponents in baffling one’s open and honorable efforts to do the right thing.

So plain the advantages of machination
It constitutes a moral obligation,
And honest wolves who think upon’t with loathing
Feel bound to don the sheep’s deceptive clothing.
So prospers still the diplomatic art,
And Satan bows, with hand upon his heart.
R.S.K.

— Ambrose Bierce, “The Devil’s Dictionary”

“I looked up the word “politics” in the dictionary and it’s actually a combination of two words; “poli,” which means many, and “tics,” which means bloodsuckers.” — Jay Leno

“Every man’s life, liberty, and property are in danger when the Legislature is in session.” — Gideon J. Tucker

“By all means, take the moral high ground — all that heavenly back lighting makes you a much easier target.” — Solomon Short

Not bad at all for a game of “pick up sticks”, post-neo-intellectual version, eh? I think, in truth, if any pundits forgot to duck, several of them COULD be bleeding now….

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Today we’ll go with a poem of my own, in order to save embarrassment for anyone else, ‘kay?….. Here’s one I wrote in 2012, such as it is…..

Semblance of Time

The dreams and visions of modern times are pallid and pale
filled with fear and loathing instead of joy and wonder.
Reality is aging poorly, submitting less data to loudly regale
Sad faded images lacking substance, or proof of thunder.

Sisters and brothers of nightly performance speak in spite
building up scars to protect, or keep a semblance of sanity.
Knowing illusion is near and dear, steeped in muscular delight
while compassion and intelligence get smothered by humanity.

Loneliness soon became the friend of many sizes of fools
stealing through mazes of social tests as if truly wise, or old
while companies of sterile opportunity are hiding their tools
from anyone who might be feeling even a little bit bold.

Painful momentary flashes seem to outline society’s fate
until soft, heavy monuments to elder gods fall from grace.
We’re all getting tired of being told we’re far too late
and never ever nearing tolerance, nor regaining any face.

A hard message awaits us all when we dare to even stay
of life’s uncaring disposition and curmudgeonly faux heart
Only with the strength of a hero may such tales make way
Only a poet may turn such pain into a valid work of art.

~~ gigoid ~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It’s looking now as if the ol’ brain just isn’t going to fire up today….. I’ve managed to fake it so far, which is fine, but, it’s going to take a strong effort to resist the urge to include a rant this morning…. If I don’t, (resist the urge, that is….), the results could be catastrophic, to say the least…. So, because we can, we’ll fall back on another old-school pearl to fill in this final section, thus preserving both the lives, and the integrity of our passengers…..

That’s fortunate, because we just couldn’t afford another set of lawsuits…. My lawyer is getting far too rich mitigating the aftereffects of my bozoid tendencies…. For now, let’s enjoy a random, parameter-less, harlequin pearl, our finest, most popular product….

“I don’t think it would have all got me down quite so much if just once in a while- just once in a while- there was at least some polite little perfunctory implication that knowledge should lead to wisdom, and that if it doesn’t, it’s just a disgusting waste of time.” — J.D. Salinger, Franny & Zooey

The rhino is a homely beast,
For human eyes he’s not a feast.
Farewell, farewell, you old rhinoceros,
I’ll stare at something less prepoceros.

— Ogden Nash (1902-1971)

“Noise proves nothing. Often a hen who has merely laid an egg cackles as if she had laid an asteroid.” — Mark Twain (1835-1910)

“It has yet to be proven that intelligence has any survival value.” — Arthur C. Clarke

“Sick cultures show a complex of symptoms … but a *dying* culture invariably exhibits personal rudeness. Bad manners. Loss of consideration for others in minor matters. A loss of politeness, of gentle manners, is more significant than is a riot.” — Friday’s boss, aka “Kettle Belly” or “Mr. Two-Canes” Baldwin…. from the book “Friday” by Robert A. Heinlein

“Laws do not persuade just because they threaten.” — Seneca, 65 AD

“Though thou be destined to live three thousand years and as many myriads besides, yet remember that no man loseth other life than that which he liveth, nor liveth other than that which he loseth.” — Marcus Aurelius Antoninus (121-180 AD) — Meditations, ii, 14

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Well, having subjected myself to the indignity of reading this whole thing, editing for errors and punching up style, as far as possible, I can truthfully say…. I’m done. No judgments I make could be accurate, given both my closeness to the material, and my lack of brain-function this morning, which has NOT improved in the two plus hours since I began staring at the screen…. If you’ll recall, it took me thirty minutes to be able to write a coherent sentence then…. I’m having the same struggle now, here at the end….

SIGH… Okay, I’ve whined enough for one day…. Now I have to go do battle with bureaucrats and business assholes, always two of my least favorite pastimes…. I have to deal with the Kaiser Pharmacy, Pat’s pharmacy, and a large wireless company…. Oh, joy…..

See ya, ffolkes, provided I can do all of this today without having to kill anyone….. It can be a near thing, sometimes, if I happen to run across a particularly stupid bureaucrat, or one of those empty-headed millennial denizens, making less than minimum wage, part-time in a wireless store…. What is it with those companies? Do they use a reverse IQ test to pick their employees, or what?…. Okay, I’ll stop ranting in the closing section now, and be off…. Ta then….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid the dubious

He’s big… I don’t know if I can take the mime…..

Posted on April 1, 2014 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

‘Tis April Fool’s Day, ffolkes, which is why I am NOT going to apologize for the title of today’s Pearl…. In fact, I’m feeling a bit of, perhaps, unwarranted pride in that one; it isn’t every day I think of such a fine piece of classical punning, much less get such a public opportunity to display it…. My only regret is that I can’t hear the groans and/or other sounds of sheer disgust that it may engender….

Now, some folks, even some ffolkes, might be upset to be given such grief over a mere pun, but, to us punsters, such reactions are a sheer delight,considered to be applause, as the proper reward for our efforts…. Hell, a good pun can actually make the audience nauseous, so the sounds of worshiping at the throne of Ralph are also considered to be music, to the ears of a true punster…. I’ve heard reports of an unexpected pun causing a nosebleed, but, I just assumed that was on the part of the punster, as a result of the punch in the nose by his, or her, ~~victim~~, er, audience…..

Now that I’ve come as close to an apology as I intend to come, we can head off into the wilds of Consensual Reality…. That is, we could, if I could find the damn keys to the gigoid-mobile. I had the darn thing waxed & polished up, and all the fold-down tables on the seat backs are new. We were also going to offer free WiFi on today’s flight, but, unless we find the keys, we won’t even be offering the daily tour…. Hang on, I think I remember where I set them down…..

YES! Here they are, right where I left them (Naturally…. did you ever notice that EVERY time we lose something, it’s always in the LAST place we think to look for it?….) (Well, of course it is…. DOH! Once it’s found, you don’t need to look for it anymore, whatever it is…. which makes it the LAST place, doesn’t it?….. Sometimes, I amaze myself with my own stupidity….) (Hah! Gotcha!…. It’s April Fool’s Day, and THAT was the SECOND, OR THIRD joke of the day…..)

Don’t worry, ffolkes, I’m almost done…..

What to do, what to do…. I’ve performed two or four obligatory jokes to honor the holiday we are celebrating today, & now find myself a trifle short of material…. Well, at least, short of the sort of material that might work here in the intro (I can put the pornography anywhere, and it will garner views, so I don’t use it here…. and, no, you can’t borrow it….). Maybe I should….. No, I promised I wouldn’t do that anymore….. Well, perhaps those old…. no, I looked at them a couple of days ago, and they won’t even sparkle any more, much less explode….. Hmm…. I know! We can break out the old, perfectly rounded, embarrassment-proof, left-over political dross left here by that candidate last November….. No, that’s out, too….. We took that stuff to the dump last month….

Oh well…. I suppose we don’t HAVE to make this any more of a standard intro than it already isn’t…. Nothing we have on hand is going to do much to make the price of the ticket worthwhile….. unless, of course, we can spot a herd of asininnies to torment. That always makes everybody feel like they’ve gotten their money’s worth….. which is a good thing, as we hate to have dissatisfied passengers on the Reality-busting gigoid-mobile, especially since we don’t actually charge any REAL money…. I always feel so, so GUILTY when someone isn’t happy with their ride; since it’s free, I kind of feel like I’ve let ffolkes down….

Now that I’ve typed up, let’s see…. SIX complete paragraphs, all chock full of time-and-taste tested April Fool’s Day material, none of which hits even a 2 on the sobriety scale….. I only wish I could say it’s even funnier than it appears to be, but, I’d just be fooling with you, so, I won’t say that…. I suppose NOW would be the best time to issue the warning….

On this particular day, one can NOT predict just exactly HOW MUCH, nor HOW LONG I may be affected by the events of the day, so it’s best to leave a lot of clear space around wherever I may be standing, sitting, or walking, as foolish, bozoid events can break out at the slightest provocation…. In other words, it can get a bit weird around here, so, please, don’t be offended by anything you see or hear today, and, please, wear the Kevlar vests provided by our insurance brokers…. Thanks….

On that note, we should proceed, before anyone starts to panic….. Shall we Pearl?…..

“Evolution–life’s a niche, and then you die.” — Smart Bee
_____________________________

Yesterday afternoon, I found the following articles, all on one subject in which I am VERY interested, all of which, taken together, prompted the outburst you see below…. It’s not as fresh as the day, but, yesterday’s not TOO far gone, so, I think it should be relatively crisp and savory…. It’s all, once again, perfectly true in all its assertions, as evidenced by the information provided in two of the links, which lead to the report mentioned in the first post, complete with justifying data…. Let’s dive in, shall we?….

ETHNOLOGY, n. “The science that treats of the various tribes of Man, as robbers, thieves, swindlers, dunces, lunatics, idiots and ethnologists.” –Ambrose Bierce, “The Devil’s Dictionary”

Or, in this case, climatologists, and those who love them least….

I have used this little entry from the Devil’s lexicon merely to highlight two factors as part of our discussion…. The first factor is to lay claim, as our statistical universe, to both the perpetrators, and the victims who are affected by the issue of climate change; in fact, with this factor, we make the obviously valid assumption that, in respect to pollution and climate change, all the various tribes of Man are both victim and perpetrator, in one…. The second factor I wish y’all to remember is a reminder, of the practical mistake in using science as the sole arbiter of any discussion, much less those concerning issues that can lead to one’s personal annihilation, aka, the final end results of man-made, unchecked changes to the climate of our planet….

With that dubiously high-falutin’ paragraph of intent behind us, allow me now depress you…. a lot….. (Fear not, it’s only for a while, and we’ll try to keep it light and humorous, as far as we can with such issues….)

The first link leads to an article from the NY Times, concerning one of the latest reports on climate change, this one issued by an Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change, comprised of a significant number of highly respected scientific experts from many different countries, with advanced degrees, and established reputations, in a number of relevant disciplines….

The next link is a short summary of the report in a PDF document format; the third is a link to the actual report, on the website of the panel who compiled it…. The last link included is a summary of the entire report, compiled by a reporter from a UK news outlet, put together for their readers, explaining many of the details of the report…. as well as including remarks from a scientist who takes a differing viewpoint….

I will comment on a number of ideas presented in the articles, hopefully AFTER you have read them…. but, if you want to skip most of the actual reading, that’s cool, the last part will stand alone, as long as you’re aware of the general area under examination….You’ll also be able to appreciate more whatever attempts at humor there may be if you do…. See you on the other side of the links…..

http://www.nytimes.com/2014/04/01/science/earth/climate.html?_r=0

http://ipcc.ch/pdf/ar5/pr_wg2/140330_pr_wgII_spm_en.pdf

https://www.ipcc.ch/report/ar5/wg1/

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/sciencetech/article-2593198/Climate-change-lead-war-famine-extreme-weather-claims-IPCC-report.html
Pictured above is the handsome, eminent Dr. Richard Tol, a scientist connected to the University of Sussex in the UK, a self-identified climatologist, (What? You’ve never heard of him? Gosh….. Nor have I….), who, with a smug, smarmy expression, stated unequivocally that all the scientists who wrote the report just a paranoid lot, a gaggle of Chicken Littles….

Well, okay, he actually just said he thought the report was an over-reaction, because HIS OWN calculations show there is much less to worry about than these worrisome ninnies are bleating about all over the news…. (Okay, he didn’t say “worrisome ninnies” or “bleating” either…. Sheesh, try to be a little dramatic, and what do I get?…. Nothing but grief….), as he stood, in an unknown location, blinking bemusedly at the reporter, obviously trying to glean as much air-time as he could possibly garner, by coming out with such a preposterously silly-ass view….

I’m sorry…. I have to say, by all appearances, this guy sure seems to have not the slightest clue as to how to get other folks believe him when he voices such , er, well nonsense?, Eh….? You’d think, if he was going to argue AGAINST all the “better known, more prestigious” scientists in the group of climatologists on the Intergovernmental Panel, ~~who were picked over him for the project~~ , er, who drew up the report, he would have at least arranged for a photo that didn’t make him look like he forgot to take his medications for the last few days…. or, alternately, that he not only knows what a hair dresser is, but, has been to see one in the past year….. Either one might just have helped his credibility factor a tad, don’t y’think? Nice tie, though….. once one gets past his expression and hair, which looks as he he set off a small explosion in it before breakfast….

But, then, humans, as a result of the bozoid features of their nature, will deliberately, and foolishly, speak out against just about anything at all, just to make noise…. I mean, look at the political world…. Well, no, wait…. Never mind, let’s don’t…. I’m not sure my stomach lining would remain intact after picturing the sheer amount of stupidity necessary, for all the pundits on the political front, to deny what is slapping THEM in the face, literally as well as figuratively….. There is, positively, (yes, you read it correctly… I said positively, NOT possibly…. positively….), no greater number, all in one select group, of sheer, ignorant fools, anywhere at all , than are currently taking up space in the Republican, and Democratic, Parties of the US Congress….

I’m talking about the sort of complete and utter idiots who continue to maintain their standing as naysayers on this issue, claiming to question both the fact of climate change, and the idea that it is caused by mankind…. They’re usually the same idiots who regard Evolution as an unproved theory, clutching their faith-based misconception of dogma tightly to their ears, as protection against hearing the definitive, obvious proof of its invalidity, rather than accepting its true status, as the FACT the rest of the scientific community regards it to be….. That much DELIBERATE stupidity, in one place, beggars the imagination, not to mention the danger it represents to the mind, and spirit, of anyone trying to calculate what are apparently negative IQ numbers….

I swear, last time I sat down to do the math on that ( That is, by calculating the # of Senators who disbelieve in climate change, and/or evolution, divided by the IQ points indicated by being able to formulate that denial, expressed as a negative number, where necessary….), I was not just appalled, I was stunned into stupefaction myself, ending up feeling the NEED to eat chocolate, just as if I’d been face-sucked by a Dementor….

If the figures are correct, it lowers the average IQ of a US Senator down into the 55-70 range, with 100 as the average human’s intelligence quotient. When I tried to perform the same set of calculations for the House of Representatives, the computer laughed at me, refusing outright to even consider having anything to do with requiring it to express a number so minuscule….

I’m depressed now. Are you depressed? I am…. I think I said that….

Oh well, who cares? None of any of this will matter in 500 years, because, by then, IF there are ANY humans still alive, they will be those who, in the last moments before succumbing to death by suffocation, were able to, somehow, flee this planet, to establish a colony somewhere else in space, overcoming all the necessary scientific and technological obstacles to survival that will ensue, to, perhaps, be able to cling to a precarious existence, on Mars, or the Moon, or one of the moons of Jupiter or Saturn….

Or, maybe, the Asteroids…. which are, in truth, the simplest way to live in space, if necessary….

Those bodies, millions upon millions of pieces of rock and ice, which orbit the Sun between Mars and Saturn, are what appears to be left over from another planet, apparently destroyed a couple billion years in the Solar System’s past… All those left-over planetary pieces are chock-full of all kinds of raw materials, most likely including water, and the raw materials needed to grow food, as well as to build our machines to travel and live in space, thus sustaining any remnants of civilization we may be able to save…. if any at all…. Power, of course, would be available in the form of both sunlight, and the presence of a gravity well in the system at large, as well as in the almost unlimited materials present in the asteroids themselves….

After the aforementioned passage of the next 500 years, given the parameters of this, and other, reports on the subject, it is for sure and for certain, almost a foregone conclusion, NONE of us humans will be left alive on THIS planet, because it will no longer be capable of supporting our form of life….. By that time, it will exist as a new planet, empty of life as we know it, one with a non-oxygen based formula in the atmosphere, fatally toxic to us, and to every other form of mammalian, reptilian, amphibious, land, or solely water-dwelling, avian, and possibly, insectoid life that now exists here….

Who knows if bacteria, virae, lichens, fungi, and molds will survive?…. We’ve found some of them on space rocks, and on spacecraft returning to Earth, so, they’re pretty tough, it seems…. But, the rest of us? Unless, as I said above, we manage to emigrate at least a few of us to another place, we’re history, count on it….

Believe it, ffolkes, because THIS is the most likely scenario, of all the ones I’ve looked at in the last 50 years of watching this “sad tale of never-ending woe and struggle”….

I’m gonna go find something more fun to do, to drive off this depression…..

“Hold the MAYO & pass the COSMIC AWARENESS…” — Zippy the Pinhead

O’Neill: “Tell you what, let me put it nicely. Get me the hell outta here!” — from Stargate
_____________________________

Here is a poem from Lewis Carroll…. I’m hoping I won’t need to explain the reason it fits in with today’s theme, other than to say, when reading this, allow free rein to your sense of metaphor…. (Hint: Little Birds = denizens of human society….)…. Enjoy!…..

Little Birds

Little Birds are dining
Warily and well,
Hid in mossy cell:
Hid, I say, by waiters
Gorgeous in their gaiters –
I’ve a Tale to tell.

Little Birds are feeding
Justices with jam,
Rich in frizzled ham:
Rich, I say, in oysters
Haunting shady cloisters –
That is what I am.

Little Birds are teaching
Tigresses to smile,
Innocent of guile:
Smile, I say, not smirkle –
Mouth a semicircle,
That’s the proper style!

Little Birds are sleeping
All among the pins,
Where the loser wins:
Where, I say, he sneezes
When and how he pleases –
So the Tale begins.

Little Birds are writing
Interesting books,
To be read by cooks:
Read, I say, not roasted –
Letterpress, when toasted,
Loses its good looks.

Little Birds are playing
Bagpipes on the shore,
Where the tourists snore:
“Thanks!” they cry. “‘Tis thrilling!
Take, oh take this shilling!
Let us have no more!”

Little Birds are bathing
Crocodiles in cream,
Like a happy dream:
Like, but not so lasting –
Crocodiles, when fasting,
Are not all they seem!

Little Birds are choking
Baronets with bun,
Taught to fire a gun:
Taught, I say, to splinter
Salmon in the winter –
Merely for the fun.

Little Birds are hiding
Crimes in carpet-bags,
Blessed by happy stags:
Blessed, I say, though beaten –
Since our friends are eaten
When the memory flags.

Little Birds are tasting
Gratitude and gold,
Pale with sudden cold:
Pale, I say, and wrinkled –
When the bells have tinkled,
And the Tale is told.

~~ Lewis Carroll ~~

_____________________________

Aye, the Tale is told, and told well…. I do enjoy a good metaphor, don’t y’all? We’ve made it as far as the last section, without any major mishaps, or any sort of diversionary actions that smack of Murphy’s tender touch…. for which, we are eternally grateful. In the perhaps futile hope of continuing this run of sheer luck, we’ll proceed to dive, to see if there are enough pearls available to fulfill our goal for the day…..

Parameters, today, are unnecessary….. serendipity is at loose in the world on days such as today, so we’ll trust in that to provide us with what we seek…. knowing that what we find will be worth the search…. If not, well, I can always comfort myself with the old saw about the journey being more important than the destination….. Abondanza!…..

How he lies in his rights of a man!
Death has done all death can.
And absorbed in the new life he leads,
He recks not, he heeds
Nor his wrong nor my vengeance; both strike
On his senses alike,
And are lost in the solemn and strange
Surprise of the change.

— Robert Browning (1812-1890) — After

“If you stand straight, do not fear a crooked shadow.” — Chinese Proverb

“The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time.” — Bertrand Russell

“A little folly is desirable in him that will not be guilty of stupidity.” — Michael de Montaigne (1533-1592) — Book iii, Chap. ix

“I am, therefore I am.” — Akira

“It is ridiculous to lay the blame of our wrong actions upon external causes, rather than on the facility with which we ourselves are caught by such causes.” — Aristotle

And in your dreams you can see yourself
As a prophet saving the world
The words from your lips
I just can’t believe you are such
A fool.

— Frank Zappa, “Oh No”.

Wow…. Serendipity, indeed….
_____________________________

Well, Stanley, this is ANOTHER fine mess you’ve gotten me into…. It is, however, done, and, if I say so myself, it’s done reasonably well….. Of course, one must keep in mind what day it is, too…. On that scary note, I’ll see y’all tomorrow…. Okay, sorry, can’t help it…. I suppose it’s not as scary, as it is resigned…. Okay, now I’m done…. probably finished as well, but, only time will tell on that one…. See ya…. for real this time….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid the dubious

As with excellence, stupidity is its own reward….

Posted on March 22, 2014 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

Regardless of how it may seem at times, no matter what it says on that commitment paper, I am NOT insane….. I also insist on making it clear that no matter WHAT the doctors may believe, it ISN’T insane to want to kill someone…. It is only when one carries out that sentiment, without having one of the several exemptions provided by custom, does society become all bent out of shape. Customary exemptions from this degree of upset over one’s actions are given when society itself wants the killing done, or, in other words, if it is done in the name of GOD or the State, (they’re often interchangeable, especially in some people’s minds….) then, it’s okay…. Go figure…

These exemptions, and the customs by which they are spawned, can be a bit complex to understand, based as they are on philosophies which are, in turn, based on a delusion…. But, most of us have the gist of it by the time we’re in our teens, even if we don’t necessarily agree with all of them….. To me, that’s the oddest part of all of this, that one’s agreement, or disagreement, with these principles, has not a single bit of influence over the idiocy they embrace…. And society doesn’t CARE whether or not any of the rules make sense; as I said, the rules are based on a delusion, and, thus, don’t require agreement, or understanding, much less any logical justification…. they only require compliance…

In my mind, the rules based on society’s view of killing another human being are completely immoral, founded, as they are, solely on the supremacy of the State over the individual, or the Church, using as its root structure the morality described by the priestly hierarchies….. This set of principles, as I see them, are so egregiously insane, I will never adopt them as my own , no matter how expedient, or how much grief it might save me…. I’ll gladly deal with whatever consequences my actions bring, as long as I have the right, and the wherewithal to make my own decisions about any of these issues…..

You might be wondering by now, just what the hell I’m talking about…. Well, damn, ffolkes, if I knew THAT, why would I be here at all? It’s not as if there is any law about whether or not what is written here has to make sense, or be logical, or even come close to what we’ll find in Reality, much as we like to claim it as our own…. No, the actual reason for all this is hidden, anyway, deep within the furthest reaches of my mind, in those dark corners where I put all the things I don’t want to see the light of day….. It’s not that I’m cruel, and wish to cause unnecessary discomfort to any poor, innocent reason…. I just don’t want to know…

You see, I DO want to kill somebody…. a lot of somebodies, now I think about it. I feel that urge several times a day, usually as I’m reading some news article about the latest shenanigans of some lying politician, or some entitled police officer, or some bigoted preacher who has managed to get their insanity covered by some reporter with no more sense they they have themselves.

Every time I see a report of a cop breaking the law instead of upholding it, or an article about some pimp beating up his women, or some corrupt judge making a decision favoring a corporation over a real person, or a politician making a speech telling us all how they’re going to help us, when all they’re doing is letting us see their latest method of stealing from the public treasury, or any number of other assininical societal trends…. well…. At those times, it takes every bit of will power I possess to keep myself from buying a gun, and a shit-load of ammunition….

Yes, I feel like killing someone regularly…. But, since I am NOT insane, I realize that before I can give in to my oh-so-justifiable urge to go kill myself an idiot, I’d better make some arrangements for making tracks afterward….. Hence, since I’ve procrastinated on that thus far, I am kill-free…. unless we’re counting mosquitoes…. How ’bout that, eh? Maybe I’ve got more will power than I thought, to be able to keep from giving in to this powerful urge for so long….

I’ll tell you, though, the way things are going these days, I’m not going to be able to get all the way through to the end of my life without first letting myself go, indulging myself in the fulfillment of my lifelong dream, of making a difference for good in the world, by the simple expedient of taking a few politicians down with me as I go….

On that pleasant note, (well, it’s pleasant to ME…. I LIKE the idea of going underground to go hunting pundits, talking heads, and assholes of all descriptions….), I think I’ll bring this already out of control introductory section to a crashing close, & head out to get started on the rest of today’s effort…. Or, as we’re fond of saying ’round here….

Shall we Pearl?…..

HOMICIDE, n. The slaying of one human being by another. There are four kinds of homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy, but it makes no great difference to the person slain whether he fell by one kind or another — the classification is for advantage of the lawyers. — Ambrose Bierce, “The Devil’s Dictionary”

“For they starve the frightened little child
Till it weeps both night and day:
And they scourge the weak, and flog the fool,
And gibe the old and grey,
And some grow mad, and all grow bad,
And none a word may say.

Each narrow cell in which we dwell
Is a foul and dark latrine,
And the fetid breath of living Death
Chokes up each grated screen,
And all, but Lust, is turned to dust
In Humanity’s machine.

And all men kill the thing they love,
By all let this be heard,
Some do it with a bitter look,
Some with a flattering word,
The coward does it with a kiss,
The brave man with a sword.”

— Oscar Wilde ~~

from “A Ballad of Reading Gaol”

“I do not wish to kill nor to be killed, but I can foresee circumstances in which these things would be by me unavoidable.” — Henry David Thoreau
_____________________________

1. No matter what they’re telling you, it’s not the truth.
2. No matter what they’re talking about, they’re talking about money.

— Todd’s Political Principles

Is this not the perfect beginning for a political rant of some sort? It would be hard to find anything better to start with, as this little aphorism delineates two of the truest, and most powerful pieces of information about politicians that anyone could discover. I’d say, if this were common knowledge, if there were a lot of people who knew this, and acted accordingly, we’d have a completely different set of people in office than we do currently….. In fact, we might have an entirely different system of governance altogether, as the inherent flaws in the one we are using now would become critically obvious in a society that knows the above, thus requiring changes to be made….

However, since I’m not up to ranting right now, I’m going to cheat a bit, and turn this into an old-school pearl, using the above Principles as the defining parameters for what is to be included….. It should be interesting, if not completely cool…. Myself, I think this should make for a great pearl, but, I AM the one who writes them, so it’s obvious, as well as perfectly justifiable, I’m a bit prejudiced…. At any rate, I hope you enjoy these little pieces of virtual wisdom….

“A man generally has two reasons for doing a thing. One that sounds good, and a real one.” — J. Pierpoint Morgan

“Be careful what you vote for. You may get it.” — Smart Bee

“The American system of ours, call it Americanism, call it Capitalism, call it what you like, gives each and every one of us a great opportunity if we only seize it with both hands and make the most of it.” — Al Capone (1899-1947)

“America’s one of the finest countries anyone ever stole.” — Bobcat Goldthwait

“If law school is so hard to get through, how come there are so many lawyers?” — Calvin Trillin

“Lord, Lord, how this world is given to lying! I grant you I was down and out of breath; and so was he. But we rose both at an instant, and fought a long hour by Shrewsbury clock.” — William Shakespeare (1564-1616), King Henry IV — Act v, Sc. 4

“The most useful tool for dealing with management types is, of course, an automatic weapon.: — Smart Bee
_____________________________

Today’s poem is from the senior of the two O.W. Holmes’s, both of whom wrote poetry, though, in my opinion, the junior example could have saved himself the effort…. He was a better jurist than poet, in my view…. His father, however, was an excellent poet; this one shows why I believe that….

Sun and Shadow

As I look from the isle, o’er its billows of green,
To the billows of foam-crested blue,
Yon bark, that afar in the distance is seen,
Half dreaming, my eyes will pursue:
Now dark in the shadow, she scatters the spray
As the chaff in the stroke of the flail;
Now white as the sea-gull, she flies on her way,
The sun gleaming bright on her sail.

Yet her pilot is thinking of dangers to shun,–
Of breakers that whiten and roar;
How little he cares, if in shadow or sun
They see him who gaze from the shore!
He looks to the beacon that looms from the reef,
To the rock that is under his lee,
As he drifts on the blast, like a wind-wafted leaf,
O’er the gulfs of the desolate sea.

Thus drifting afar to the dim-vaulted caves
Where life and its ventures are laid,
The dreamers who gaze while we battle the waves
May see us in sunshine or shade;
Yet true to our course, though the shadows grow dark,
We’ll trim our broad sail as before,
And stand by the rudder that governs the bark,
Nor ask how we look from the shore!

~~ Oliver Wendell Holmes ~~

_____________________________

Today’s intro section was the closest I’ll be able to come to a true rant, I think…. I know, I’m breaking your heart, right?…. Nonetheless, I’m going to forgo any such vocal egotism today, & go with another old-school pearl, just because I can, and because I want to….. As a retired dilettante, I can do that, legally, so, back off…. Alternately, you may stick around, and enjoy the rest of today’s pearls, as best you may…. There will be no parameters for this one, so, watch your step…. sometimes, they squirt……

“I only touch base with reality on an as-needed basis!” — Royal Floyd Mengot (Klaus)

And in your dreams you can see yourself
As a prophet saving the world
The words from your lips
I just can’t believe you are such
A fool.

— Frank Zappa, “Oh No”.

“Invite the man that loves thee to a feast, but let alone thine enemy.” — Hesiod (c. 700 BC) — Works and Days, Line 342

“Experience is the name that everyone gives to their mistakes.” — Oscar Wilde

“You know, it’s not the world that was my oppressor, because what the world does to you, if the world does it to you long enough and effectively enough, you begin to do to yourself.” — James Baldwin.

“Belief is not the beginning but the end of all knowledge.” — Goethe

1) Things will get worse before they get better.
2) Who said they get better?

— Ehrman’s Commentary
_____________________________

“I, for my own part, had much rather people should say of me that there neither is nor ever was such a man as Plutarch, than that they should say, “Plutarch is an unsteady, fickle, froward, vindictive, and touchy fellow.” — Plutarch (46-120 AD) — Of Superstition

Same goes for gigoid, ffolkes…. I don’t think, at this point, I can do anything more…. Positive or negative, I’m done…. not just done, but, finished, as well, which is a much more serious thing. To deal with the expected legal challenges, I’d better head out into the rest of the day….. See you tomorrow, should I figure out how to survive another day….. Odds are pretty good, I think, given my track record….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid the dubious

Look, Amelia, it’s a flock of abusive platitudes….

Posted on March 16, 2014 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

Hardly a day goes by I don’t think about that old man…. I don’t know, exactly, why it still bothers me; I didn’t even know him. But, ever since that day we first saw him, standing there on the corner by the market downtown, waving around that silly old broken pistol, threatening to start shooting if people didn’t listen to him…. Of course, nobody ever did, and he never started shooting; he was just another crazy old coot with a decrepit war souvenir and too many memories…. Who wants to listen to some old guy rambling on about honor and duty and stuff, anyway?

I was only six the first we saw him there, outside the neighborhood store on 114th & Linden, when we came out from the weekly shopping…. I recall him standing up on that old wooden box, shouting and yelling at whoever walked by….. I remember, even then, in the middle of a New York winter, he didn’t have a coat….

I think that’s what bothered me about it for a long time…. At six, I still worried about people, and how they lived, so it bothered me to see this old man out in the cold with no coat…. I asked my mother why he didn’t have one, and she told me he refused to wear one, that he was too broken in his mind to understand it could hurt him; at six, this idea made him an irresistible bone for my mind to chew on….

REALITY BREAK: This is a message from normal space/time…. Well, make that, as normal as ever, I suppose…. I’m bored with that opening…. Okay, that’s a lie; I’m not bored, but I don’t like it, and it’s expedient to use boredom as an excuse …..Sometimes I forget, like everyone, that one MUST BE an example of what one preaches in re: honor and truth…. or, it’s just another bunch of BS…. Mama don’t allow no BS around here, so, the truth it must be, for this boyo….

I do get tired of being accused of being a miserable sinner, but, hey, all those hard-ass tightwads (or is that tightass hardwads?…) need to have somebody to pick on, and they don’t bother me much, so let ’em talk…. Now, where was I, before I so rudely interrupted myself?….

Ah, here we are…. Me apologia, but, I’m cutting this off here because I don’t like it much, and none of the faux introductions are biting at me to get turned into a full story, though, it may happen some day…. You’ll have to be patient, because it will be a while before I do get any of them completed…. It’s just not high on my list of stuff to get done right now…. Currently, I’m not sure what IS on the list, but, I know I’ve got one around here somewhere…. Maybe it’s in…. nope…. Ah well, I’ll look for that later…. I’m thinking right now I should either throw out another distraction, start over, or just get on with today’s dive for pearls….

As you might guess, I’m leaning toward the latter, as it’s the only one that fits in with the plan I have going…. a plan you didn’t even know was there, did you?…. C’mon, now, ‘fess up…. I managed to keep you from seeing this coming, didn’t I?…. Yep, I know I did, so there’s no point in denying….

Well, if you’re going to be THAT way about it, I suppose I’ll just have to assume control of the ship again, and take us out of here, before I lose track of how much fuel we have…. There’s probably enough, but, we don’t want to have to bail out on the way back because we ran out, now, do we? No, I didn’t think that would go over too well….

Ah, the hell with it…. Screw the Mr. Nice Guy routine…. Fuck it, ffolkes…. hang on, we’re goin’ for a dive!…..

Shall we Pearl?…..

“It is great good health to believe, as the Hindus do, that there are 33 million gods and goddesses in the world. It is great good health to want to understand one’s dreams. It is great good health to desire the ambiguous and paradoxical. It is sickness of the profoundest kind to believe that there is one reality. There is sickness in any piece of work or any piece of art seriously attempting to suggest that the idea that there is more than one reality is somehow redundant.” — Clive Barker
_____________________________

“…when all government… in little as in great things, shall be drawn to Washington as the centre of all power, it will render powerless the checks provided of one government on another and will become as venal and oppressive as the government from which we separated.” — Thomas Jefferson, 1821

Before we begin, please read the article attached to the link below; it contains information that will be necessary to a full appreciation/understanding of the discussion to follow…..

http://www.sfgate.com/news/article/FDIC-sues-16-big-banks-that-set-key-rate-5318301.php

After reading this article all the way through, I came perilously close to puking, only resisting the urge, strong as it was, because I wasn’t in a place where it would have been convenient….. However, I WAS able to determine, immediately upon completion of the article, that I would definitely be ranting on this one, for sure and for certain…. This CRIES out to discussed, and, who am I to destroy the wishes of such a plaintive, compelling cry for social justice?

Did you catch the key points in the report on these asshole bankers and their naked avarice? To me, one of the key points in the article, which shows just how ridiculous the whole thing becomes when examined in ANY light, is the sentence imposed on the banks for admitting their guilt…. Essentially, the decision says this: a) the banks were guilty of defrauding their customers (again)…. they admitted it without a qualm; b) they only have to pay back PART of what they stole by doing so, and c) they don’t have to go to jail, they get to stay in business, and keep ALL of the profits they made by this theft.

You know, it makes me wonder…. I’d wager serious money (if I could cover the bet…. I’m not a bank, and I bet with honor….)….. very serious money, that the banks, when they planned out their campaign of theft in this instance, included in their plans a certain amount of money to be set aside to pay the legal fees involved in defending themselves, once they were found out, and sued for the fraud….

I BET they knew before they started that, eventually, the SEC and their counterparts (i.e., government thieves….) in the BRC would catch them in their thievery, and take them to court, so they set aside a percentage of the profits to be made to cover that, and proceeded with the plan to steal from their customers, (i.e. US, you and me, and all the other little investors whose money they steal on a regular basis….), knowing ahead of time that they’d never do any time in jail, and could count on a certain amount of profit on the deal…

I don’t think anyone would take that bet, unless they’re stupider than they look….. Ffolkes, how much more proof is necessary? How many times do we have to let these assholes fuck everyone else in the world, and let them get away with it, before we do something about stopping it?

Personally, I’ve about had it up to here (makes motion at neck…) with their sheer gall, to carry out a scheme like this, in full view of the public, knowing they’ll be able to not only get away with it without ever spending any time in jail for their crimes, but will make a decent profit by doing so…. a profit they, of course, feel is their RIGHT to make, just because they want it…..

It’s not the money…. though, of course, it would help a lot of people if it wasn’t stolen…. No, it’s the sheer effrontery, the gall, the entitlement that gives these assholes the idea they can do this with impunity that bothers me the most…. It’s the kind of thing calculated to piss me off thoroughly enough to take action in a very real sense, even if that action isn’t necessarily the one that will help the most….

No, I’m tempted, almost beyond control, to go buy a gun, and a LOT of bullets that go with the gun, so I could start picking off the greedy bankers, inept and/or dishonest politicians, corrupt judges, aggressive, entitled, police ~~bullies~~ officers, pedophiliac, smarmy, manipulative priests & preachers, and all the other assholes who dump their loads of BS all over everyone else in the pursuit of their own agendas, never caring at all how many others they harm in the process…

Yep, ffolkes, the time is drawing nigh when my patience will be at an end, and I’ll actually DO something that will, if nothing else, make me feel as if I’d helped in a small way to put a stop to the bullshit going on all around us…. It may not change society, but I’ll damn sure feel a lot better, you betcha….

Bah, humbug! Writing about this has gotten me as worked up as reading the article did originally; I’m sitting here vibrating with anger at the corporate assholes who are constantly degrading life for the rest of us, and wishing there were some way to speed up the time until I can afford to buy a decent weapon (by “decent” I mean, of course, that it will do all I want it to do….)…. I have a feeling it won’t be terribly long now until that day actually arrives…. and I can’t wait, to tell the truth….

I’m too worked up to rant further about this, though I can feel a lot more inside me that needs to be released…. So, I’ll finish off with a little five-star pearl, using as a parameter the same subject upon which we’ve been gnawing…. Hey, it’s a quick, legitimate way to bring this to a dignified, if choppy, ending….. Enjoy….

— How many politicians does it take to change a light bulb? Four, one to change it and the other three to deny it. — Smart Bee

“Dealing with the government is like kicking a 300-pound sponge.” — Finagle’s Law of Government Contracting

“We are hypnotized into believing that two TV sets will make us twice as happy as one TV set.” — Laura Huxley (wife of Aldous)

“The most certain test by which we judge whether a country is really free is the amount of security enjoyed by minorities.” — John E.E. Dalberg, Lord Acton (1834-1902), — “The History of Freedom in Antiquity”

“I don’t want the cheese, I just want to get out of the trap.” — Spanish Proverb
_____________________________

Yesterday’s poem reminded me why I love Emily Dickinson’s work….. and….. since I’m already in a mood from writing the above, I’m going back to the same well for more sustenance….

It was not death, for I stood up,
And all the dead lie down;
It was not night, for all the bells
Put out their tongues, for noon.

It was not frost, for on my flesh
I felt siroccos crawl,–
Nor fire, for just my marble feet
Could keep a chancel cool.

And yet it tasted like them all;
The figures I have seen
Set orderly, for burial,
Reminded me of mine,

As if my life were shaven
And fitted to a frame,
And could not breathe without a key;
And ‘t was like midnight, some,

When everything that ticked has stopped,
And space stares, all around,
Or grisly frosts, first autumn morns,
Repeal the beating ground.

But most like chaos,–stopless, cool,–
Without a chance or spar,–
Or even a report of land
To justify despair.

~~ Emily Dickinson ~~

Well, I feel better….. and that’s enough. I hope you enjoyed it as well (except for Shawna…. she doesn’t have to, if she doesn’t want to….That is, if she’s still out there, reading this….) (If she is, it would be nice to know…. hint, hint…)
_____________________________

You know as well as I do what is coming now, so don’t tell me you weren’t expecting it….. Since we’re assuming prior knowledge here, I’m going to also assume y’all know how this works, so I’ll merely say this…. When picking these pearls, I had only one thought in mind, to use as a guide about what should, or shouldn’t, be included…. It’s really too bad the thought I had was so strange, so very odd, almost to the point of perversion, I had to throw it out, and find another one…. Unfortunately, on such short notice, I have no frigging clue as to what that one might be, so we’ll just have to deal with whatever shows itself, ‘kay?….. ‘Kay!….

BRAHMA, n. He who created the Hindoos, who are preserved by Vishnu and destroyed by Siva — a rather neater division of labor than is found among the deities of some other nations. The Abracadabranese, for example, are created by Sin, maintained by Theft and destroyed by Folly. The priests of Brahma, like those of Abracadabranese, are holy and learned men who are never naughty.

O Brahma, thou rare old Divinity,
First Person of the Hindoo Trinity,
You sit there so calm and securely,
With feet folded up so demurely —
You’re the First Person Singular, surely.
Polydore Smith

— Ambrose Bierce, “The Devil’s Dictionary”

“I’m not sure I want popular opinion on my side — I’ve noticed those with the most opinions often have the fewest facts.” — Bethania McKenstry

“Forget about World Peace…Visualize using your turn signal.” — Bumper Sticker

(Irresistible side comment: I’d like to see this tattooed on the forehead of every police officer in America…. gigoid….)

But Memory blushes at the sneer,
And Honor turns with frown defiant,
And Freedom, leaning on her spear,
Laughs louder than the laughing giant.

— Oliver Wendell Holmes (1809-1894) — A Good Time going

“It does not do to leave a live dragon out of your calculations, if you live near him.” — J.R.R. Tolkien, Lord of the Rings

“Most people are bothered by those passages of Scripture they do not understand, but the passages that bother me are those I do understand.” — Mark Twain (1835-1910)

“YOW!! I’m in a very clever and adorable INSANE ASYLUM!!” — Zippy the Pinhead

Okay, so it’s a strange one, even for around here…. deal, ffolkes, deal…. anything that starts with Ambrose Bierce, and ends with Zippy, is guaranteed to make some kind of logical, and/or illogical, sense…. It’s mathematically impossible for it to NOT make sense, so, believe me, it’s in there…. It may take a broken pencil or two, and possibly a month’s supply of erasers, but, it’s there…. Trust me…. It’s okay, I’m not a politician, so it’s really alright to do that….
_____________________________

Whatever I had in mind when I sat down today to begin, this isn’t it. What it is, is, though, and, as we all know, Popeye is never wrong about stuff like this…. So, this means we’ll all just have to deal with that…. To reinforce that concept, and, I suppose, to enforce it as well, I’ll now go post this, entrusting the gods of email with the task of delivering these random musings to the Pearl Drops group, and, having faith the gods of html:protocol will enable their presence on the World Wide Web, even if hidden in my domain…. See you tomorrow, ffolkes….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid the dubious

We’re inspecting hot beef sandwiches…

Posted on March 15, 2014 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

Howdy… Come on in, & look closely at this paragraph…. Please note the obligatory placement, here at the front of this article, where one expects to find it, in all its introductory glory. If it were another kind of paragraph, we wouldn’t be able to abuse it like we do here at ECR…. The others are all too vocal in their complaints. This one seems to just lie there and take whatever I throw its way, never complaining. Of course, it never does much to help, either…. it just sits there, allowing me to force practically ANYTHING down its gullet, to see if we can come up with something new and fresh for ffolkes to enjoy. I suppose it would be nice if it had a bit more pizazz, but, hey, what do you want in an actual intro?…. Style? Hah! Interest? Bah!…. A bold faced LIE! That’s what we need!…. It always works for Barack….

Sorry, couldn’t help myself….. I get carried away by my enthusiasm at times, as you may have noted…. or not. Regardless, I do tend to go a bit overboard in certain literary instances; it’s habitual, you see, from my misspent youth, the major portion of which I spent as a captive journalist in an unnamed Third World country….

I was on safari with my family when I was very young, when I was taken by slave hunters, and sold to a business man in China…. He forced me to slave away my tender years in his newspaper office, chained to a desk in the Features section, writing fluff pieces for the insert magazines in the weekend edition…. It was a torturous way to grow up, and I don’t miss it, except, occasionally, I’ll feel a pang of nostalgia for the fond memories I have of removing my master’s head from his shoulders with a nice, sharp katana….

Now that we’ve had our little sojourn into the land of fantasy, and a short break or two, (I’m a bit stiff this morning…. and not in a good way….), I think I’ve figured out how to extricate myself from this intro section with a bit less pain than usually is the case…. we’ll use some WD-40!…. It’s amazing how many things can be unstuck by a little bit of this technological magic…. Just a bit of it, right on the keyboard, and there’s no typing on it for hours, until it has all ‘penetrated’ to its required depth….. I know, it SOUNDS perverted, but it really isn’t any big deal, and for all its a tool, AND a household tip, it’s actually pretty clean in its habits…. Doesn’t whine much, either…

Of course, now that we’ve adopted this somewhat odd method of introductory shenanigans, there is a distinct possibility of becoming hidebound, or, alternately, completely deranged….. Both have been seen in clinical trials of this product, so, we’ll have to wait and see on those…. In the meantime, I’m looking back over what’s been done so far, and it’s not bad…. I don’t see any blood anywhere, and nobody has asked for any bandages; this makes for a nice, quiet morning, don’t you think? I do, sort of…. think, that is…

Shall we Pearl?…..

“It is only the superficial qualities that last. Man’s deeper nature is soon found out.” — Oscar Wilde
_____________________________

This pearl will be what I call an odd duck…. well, I guess one could say it already is, and I’m just pot/kettling, or, prognosticating without a license…. Any who, in the normal course of events in our mornings around here, a rant would be the order of the day for this point in time…. A rant, however, requires from me a certain state of mind, fueled by outrage, supported by angst-filled emotional turmoil left over from my days as a certified, full-on crazy dude, before I tore up my certificate, and went natural….

As is patently obvious by this time, that state of mind is in a different state, probably Minnesota by this time. (I don’t KNOW why it would, or should be Minnesota…. that’s just what was in the note…), so a rant won’t be forthcoming, despite having beau coups material to choose from out in the BBR…..

What I DO have for you is a very, very good article by one of my favorite columnists, on one of the subjects about which I tend to rant, to wit: recent events in the central arena of the political circus, wherein we have DiFi (Her Gargantuan Majesty, Senator Dianne Feinstein….), and her current feud with the CIA, over the continuing cover-up of their involvement in torture during the Shrub’s reign, a cover-up they have been (clumsily) trying to extend to include her precious Senate Committee on Intelligence, by refusing to show documents, or hacking into Congressional computers to try to steal back documents they didn’t want seen…. She is now pissed off at them, big time, and the following article discusses that issue with great clarity and insight….

After you read the article, like a good little Gentle Reader, I have included a nice little seven-star pearl for your reading pleasure, and, hopefully, your eventual enlightenment…..

http://www.sfgate.com/entertainment/carroll/article/DiFi-bites-the-hand-that-fed-her-5315594.php

(The parameter for this pearl is: “Politics, schmolitics…. Back off! We’re talkin’ business here!”…. Joe Lobbyist…)

CUI BONO? [Latin] What good would that do _me_? — Ambrose Bierce, “The Devil’s Dictionary

(You will find this engraved over the doorway to every law school in America….though, in many cases, the translation reads, “What’s in it for ME?”)

“Be not as one that hath ten thousand years to live; death is nigh at hand: while thou livest, while thou hast time, be good.” — Marcus Aurelius Antoninus (121-180 AD) — Meditations, iv, 17

“God does not play dice with the universe; He plays an ineffable game of his own devising, which might be compared, from the perspective of any of the other players, to being involved in an obscure and complex version of poker in a pitch dark room, with blank cards, for infinite stakes, with a dealer who won’t tell you the rules, and who smiles all the time.” — Gaiman and Pratchett, Good Omens

“There’s no problem so awful that you can’t add some guilt to it and make it even worse.” — Calvin and Hobbes

“It is better to debate a question without settling it than to settle a question without debating it.” — Joseph Joubert

“All the world’s a Schrödinger Box, and we are merely kitties.” — Smart Bee

“We read of a certain Roman emperor who built a magnificent palace. In digging the foundation, the workmen discovered a golden sarcophagus ornamented with three circlets, on which were inscribed, “I have expended; I have given; I have kept; I have possessed; I do possess; I have lost; I am punished. What I formerly expended, I have; what I gave away, I have.” — Gesta Romanorum — Tale xvi

No, I don’t know, so, please, stop asking me why it turned like that…. It just did, and wouldn’t let me turn it back…. Oh well, there must be a lesson in there we need to learn…. I’ve found that to often be the case when I don’t get a pearl’s subconscious point at first look… It can take a few readings, and some percolation of ideas before it becomes clear just what my inner sage was trying to get us to see…. I think, though, given the pearls I see here, you can trust that this lesson is one worth meeting the challenge to figure it out….
_____________________________

There are days when finding the right poem becomes problematic…. Usually, it’s because I can’t make up my mind, not for any esoteric, intelligent reason, so there’s no need for sympathy…. I’m just telling it like it is…. Any who, in many of those cases, as in today’s instance, I turn to the person whom I most admire as a poet…. If you asked me “why”, my only response would be “because”…. because of poems like this….

Death sets a thing significant
The eye had hurried by,
Except a perished creature
Entreat us tenderly

To ponder little workmanships
In crayon or in wool,
With “This was last her fingers did,”
Industrious until

The thimble weighed too heavy,
The stitches stopped themselves,
And then ‘t was put among the dust
Upon the closet shelves.

A book I have, a friend gave,
Whose pencil, here and there,
Had notched the place that pleased him,–
At rest his fingers are.

Now, when I read, I read not,
For interrupting tears
Obliterate the etchings
Too costly for repairs.

~~ Emily Dickinson ~~

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I don’t know if it is obvious to y’all, but I’m suffering today from severe burn-out; my creative juices are dried up, to the point of choking me on dust when I try to compose anything more complex than whining, as is patently the case today. Rather than subject y’all to any more of my less-than-dignified complaining, we’ll go for another old-school pearl, with the only parameter being that the each included pearl should say something “nice”…. Let’s see how realistic THAT is….

“For man, as for flower and beast and bird, the supreme triumph is to be most vividly, most perfectly alive.” — David H. Lawrence

(It took me four readings of this before I finally figured out what other name David H. Lawrence is known by…. think, “D.H…”) (Yeah, me too…. Doh!)

“There is no difference between a wise man and a fool when they fall in love.” — Murphy’s laws on sex

“It sometimes happens, even in the best of families, that a baby is born. This is not necessarily cause for alarm. The important thing is to keep your wits about you and borrow some money.” — Elinor Goulding Smith

“Sir? She’s giving “Reality” as a *previous* address!” — Smart Bee

“Do not do unto others as you would they should do unto you. Their tastes may not be the same.” — George Bernard Shaw, Man and Superman (1903), Maxims for — Revolutionists: The Golden Rule

“I think fish is nice, but then I think that rain is wet, so who am I to judge?” — The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

“Consider the daffodil. And while you’re doing that, I’ll be over here, looking through your stuff.” — Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handey

I don’t care what anyone says…. I like it. Since it, surprisingly, measures 8 on a scale of 10 for whimsy, it may be one of the better pearls we’ve found in some time…. I hope reading it is as much fun for you, as putting it together was for me….
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Having thus completed the required number of sections, without calculating the cost, or the consequences, I shall now proceed to perform the last act of defiance…. meaning I’ll go post it, regardless of how insane that may seem to anyone else…. I stopped worrying about that a long time ago, thank goodness…. Fair warning: see you tomorrow….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid the dubious

In order to create, one must first destroy….

Posted on March 5, 2014 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

Nearly a crisis today, upon arising, but, matters were resolved before any major explosions occurred; all is serene once more…. which leaves me in the usual delicate position of being up, with nothing particularly helpful in my head to get this going…. I could have started this with a fictional opening; I’ve got several percolating in my head, (a really cool one about this orphaned telekinetic girl child on Antares IV, who is trying to find her way back to Earth, has been in there, but, the gimmick isn’t quite right, so it needs to simmer a while….), but, nothing really feels like it will do the trick. I could start rambling and blathering, but, all of my random BS is currently in use on other projects, so….

I suppose I could actually go ahead and write a real introduction, with hints of what is to come, and little verbal tricks to engage your interests, thus pulling you into the rest of today’s effort, before you realize you’ve been captured. But then you might get mad, and just leave halfway through, and we can’t have that; readus interruptus is no picnic, believe me. The shock that gives the nervous system has been known to put me in bed for a week, last time I got mad and left in the middle like that….. I wouldn’t want ANYONE to have to go through that, so, that’s out….

Maybe I could…. no, I forgot…. the sheriff told me I couldn’t use that one anymore because of how the neighbors react…. too many calls to dispatch about the colored lights and strange noises coming out of my cat…. Since that’s out, perhaps we should just let it all go, book a suite on the Queen Mary, and head out for a world cruise…. But, that would use up all the money I saved for taxes, and Uncle Sammy gets kinda upset when you tell him he can’t have his tax money when he wants it…. Not that upsetting him would make me cry very hard….

Since all of that stuff won’t do, I suppose we’ll just have to do like we always do, and fake it…. At least today it’s a relatively short fake, and doesn’t have so much involved that it will leave any marks, or cause any extra trips to the dry cleaner. In fact, this may be one of the cleanest intro’s I’ve put out in many moons, what with all the overt nonsense I DIDN’T put in here today….. On most days when I fall back on this particular technique, there are a lot more instances of JPS phrases and/or concepts (JPS = Just Plain Strange), which tend to create more of a party atmosphere; thankfully, no parties this morning!…..

In fact, not only is there no party, we’re done…. We’ve reached one of the federally mandated limits for introductory sections in blogging sites of this nature, so, I’m taking the money, and running for the border…. Well, sort of…. Actually, this is a variation on emergency intro ending #4, where I blame the feds for it all, and just leave, like this….

Shall we Pearl?….

“And in the end the love you take is equal to the love you make.” — The Beatles, The last lyric of their last song
_____________________________

Today’s rant is in section three…. It’s a combination of an archived rant, followed by comments from a more current viewpoint, in a form of mild cheating…. This, of course, means that this section will find itself the home of today’s old-school pearl, picked fresh from the depths of the Smart Bee database, under the random direction of my own imagination, down the esoteric paths to where our virtual wisdom may be found…. Or, not… Either way, it’s all good fun, which is something the universe is kind enough to furnish for us, to balance out the crap it puts us through…. Let’s see what we can find today….

“Lawyers: the larval form of politicians.” — Webster’s Collegiate Dictionary, 53rd edition, 2025 (After the revolution….)

“I HAVE to buy a new “DODGE MISER” and two dozen JORDACHE JEANS because my view screen is “USER-FRIENDLY”!!” — Zippy the Pinhead

“I am NOT a nut….” — Zippy the Pinhead

Accidents cause History: “If Sigismund Unbuckle had taken a walk in 1426 and met Wat Tyler, the Peasant’s Revolt would never have happened and the motor car would not have been invented until 2026, which would have meant that all the oil could have been used for lamps, thus saving the electric light bulb and the whale, and nobody would have caught Moby Dick or Billy Budd.” — Mike Harding, “The Armchair Anarchist’s Almanac”

He that will not reason is a bigot.
He that cannot reason is a fool.
He that dares not reason is a slave.

— William Drummond, “Academical Questions”

“Wouldn’t it be wonderful if everyone renounced violence forever? I could then conquer the whole stupid planet with just a butter knife.” — Smart Bee

Non carborundum illegitimi. (Don’t let the bastards wear you down.) — Job, 2433 B.C.

Okay…. I know I have to take responsibility for that…. I don’t want to, but, I’d have to give up my ranting license if I tried to blame Smart Bee for all of it…. I’m busted; I DID make up some of the author’s names…. there…. Nobody can accuse me of dishonesty…. Of course, I can’t speak to the somewhat eclectic nature of the involved concepts, or how the pearls fit together (though, trust me, they do…), but, I’ll take the blame anyway, since it’s still only the first section, and the pilot’s not here today…. Now we know the guilty party, shall we continue?….
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As I begin this section today, I have no clue about what poem to put in…. Usually I have some idea of what I want, but, my mind/body composite is a bit, shall we say, discombobulated (love that word…. so accurate at times….), so the exact nature of that (what I want, exactly….) can’t currently be determined…. I guess it’s kind of like when the Network Administrator shuts down a server for maintenance or upgrade, and you can’t access certain programs while it’s being used…. you can’t get there from here…. Hence, I haven’t a fucking clue about what I want right now….

S’okay…. If I did, it probably would cause some sort of annoying emotional response…. Been there, done that, not goin’ back…. All this is merely to let you know that whatever follows may be a trifle suspect, being, as it is, the unfortunate result of a very weary, yet somehow concurrently enervated mind’s less-than-completely-frenetic search for peace…. in all the wrong places, patently….

Perhaps its a sign that the day will now take a turn for the better….. In my search, I went with an impulse, and went first to my own stash of bloody pieces of my soul, which I keep in the Poetry folder on my computer…. The first one that caught my eye was this one, and, upon reading it, I understand why…. No worries, it isn’t necessary for y’all to know exactly why, because the poem is good enough (in my estimation) to make it worth reading…. even if it doesn’t rhyme, like most of my poetry…. I hope you enjoy it…. it made me feel better, so, good enough…

Early Observations

Until I knew there was more,
I wanted to know God.
They said he was a nice guy,
& would let me live forever.

All I had to do, they said,
was live my life for Him,
always living by scripture
cleaving only to His Way.

But, everyone I saw in church,
acted different at home.
Living wild, cussin’, and fussin’,
nobody lived like they said.

Still, I tried to be like Jesus,
he was sort of cool.
He never hurt nobody
& walked on the right path.

‘Course they killed him for that,
they couldn’t stand his example.
Turned him into a martyr,
hid his real words among their own.

Then I found the Buddha,
and met Lao Tzu at the gate.
They saw things real different,
showed me how to see straight.

Right thought, and right action
replace blind obedience and faith.
Reality becomes manageable,
fear retreats, the universe expands.

Brother John said it pretty well,
“Imagine there’s no heaven,
it’s easy if you try.”
Sounds like he knew why.

Day to day, life is grand,
we walk in eternal beauty.
Open your eyes and hearts,
find yourself already immortal.

~~ gigoid ~~

_____________________________

“Everything in the universe exists in duality…. light/dark, life/death, etc. Which side of reality is good, and which is bad, is all in the mind of the folks looking at it…. For some reason, those folks, to wit: we humans, always seem to insist on making judgments about which is which. This is part of why a lot of folks have problems dealing with reality, because reality doesn’t care one way or the other; things are not good OR bad, they just ARE.…” — gigoid

I first wrote the above aphorism on 6/30/2012, as part of a reply to a comment from my friend, and fellow blogger, Willowdot21, which she made after reading the Pearl posted that day, specifically, the following, which comprised section two or three of the Pearl for that date…. I like it, so, here ’tis again, just because I can….

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.” — Sir Winston Churchill

“…for DEATH awaits you all, with nasty sharp pointy teeth!” — Monty Python and the Holy Grail

Death. The great equalizer. Nobody gets away from it. As a matter of fact, it has been proven, beyond a shadow of doubt, that everyone who breathes air, dies. So, air must not be good for us, right? That’s logic….. Of course it’s logical. It is also, however, not a true conclusion, and serves as an example of the fact that logic doesn’t always lead to the correct answer to any particular question….. sometimes you gotta just go by what is real…..

I like the first quote, by Winnie…. should the Christian viewpoint turn out to have been true, I would prefer to meet my maker with this same attitude. To my way of thinking, if it (Christianity) IS true, then God has a lot to answer for. I’m sorry, but I just can’t believe in any deity who would allow his creation to show such perversions as this species has shown. Whenever I bring this point up to a priest, or theologian of any sort, all I get is “God works in mysterious ways….”

Yeah? Is that right? You say there is some hidden purpose to those actions, so deep and mysterious we don’t understand? Well, fuck God then. I don’t care a whit if there is some hidden purpose; there is NO ACCEPTABLE REASON to suppose that a merciful God would condone child molesters, or rapists, or torture, (even during war). I don’t believe it; it is neither logical, nor rational….

Claiming that God is beyond our understanding, and therefore we cannot understand his reasons for allowing such actions, is pure bullshit. If he is that far above us, why are his morals so perverted? I don’t care what you say, I won’t accept the rape of a child as being justifiable from ANY standpoint. None. And if God does have some justification, well, I ain’t buying it. No matter what it is, it isn’t right….. Going along with it, believing the lie, is just another cowardly way of avoiding responsibility…..

Men are responsible for these actions, not God. Men kill, and rape, and pillage, and manipulate and coerce their fellows into performing acts of heinous nature. At times in history, this killing has taken place in the name of God, as the fanatical zealots so common to Christianity throughout its bloody history carried their own particular brand of oppression, for the glory of God, to new lands, forcing the natives to swallow their version of reality, regardless of how they felt about it.

This kind of zealotry continues in today’s world, with the current Republican candidate all set to bring the US right back into the Stone Age, should he, through some cruel quirk of fate, be elected as POTUS. If that happens, I’d wager serious money Armageddon will be close behind, as I don’t think the rest of the world is going to sit still long enough for him to cram his own faith down their throats. Hell, right here at home, should he be elected, I’d be very surprised if there ISN’T a revolutionary upheaval, within a few months of the election.

I know I would certainly be considering assassination as a viable political tool…. It’s now legal for us to use torture as a resource, (if you question this assertion, just perform a Google search of the words “water boarding”…. & read any of the several thousand examples of our government’s use of torture since 2001…), why should we balk at assassination?

Ah me…. I guess I got too much sleep. It seems to have awakened my old hippie instincts; I haven’t talked revolution in oh, six or eight months now…. I suppose I’ll just have to wait until November, to see which way to jump…. let’s hope for the best, but prepare for the worst. That’s always the best policy….. for survival, anyway….and that may become our primary goal, if things keep on keepin’ on…..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Note from the future: Apparently, things in Reality haven’t changed a lot since the election…. I seem to recall mentioning that it is time to consider revolution as little as a day or two ago, so the events and issues that have arisen over the period of time since the last presidential election haven’t served to convince me there is any less of a need for it to take place…. the sooner the better, as is true in the case of ANY needed revolution…..

The American government, as far as I can see, has been usurped from the control of the people, and has become an oligarchy, with only the rich and powerful allowed to participate in any decision making processes that involve all of society…. The common man is no longer a part of the American governing process, even as voters…

This isn’t merely a claim, by the way…. The gap in the income levels of the average American and those who get elected to office in this country is larger than it’s ever been, and growing each day, as the 1%, (Y’know, it’s actually far less than 1% of over 7 billion people, which would be what, 70 million people? Yeah, that’s correct….)

The truth is, the number of people making those decisions is more like maybe, oh, 1000 to 2000 people, or thereabout, world-wide, who actually make the crucial decisions about EVERYTHING that occurs in society….), who control 99% of the money and physical resources in the world, make their daily inroads into controlling the rest of it, as well. In the US Senate alone, well over half of the Senators are millionaires, with the rest making well over $100, 000 per year…. the average joe on the streets pulls down, maybe, if they’re lucky, $15,000-20,000 per year…..

It’s actually worse than that, ffolkes, because the ones who get themselves elected are merely the front men for the actual rulers of society…. They aren’t even the most well-paid of the lot the shadowy corporate slave masters have working for them, even though they have to be in the spotlight. They’re just the most easily manipulated of the elite, themselves under the control of those few who have the real power.

None of the actual rulers of mankind have faces familiar to anyone outside their immediate circle; they can’t afford to let people know who they are for sure, as they’d be dead within moments, if their machinations were revealed to those they oppress, as they have done for thousands of years, as a matter of course…..

Corporation: “An ingenious device for obtaining individual profit without individual responsibility.” — Ambrose Bierce: “The Devil’s Dictionary”

And, corporations are just the LATEST innovation those shadowy masters of society came up with in their reign over mankind…. Ah well, we got past the election to which I refer above, but, the running dog lackey that got elected isn’t much different, on the bottom line, than the one he defeated at the polls….

In defense of that statement, I refer you to the NDAA, signed in secret so the public couldn’t object to any of its provisions, and to the Eric Snowden fiasco, which pulled the president’s covers again, revealing him to be just another myrmidon of the slave masters, doing their bidding while preaching about how much they are helping the people (a process George Carlin rightly identified as “The Fucking of America”….)….

SIGH…. Enough ranting against the Asininnies for one day…. They’ll still be here tomorrow, and will have, no doubt, furnished me with yet more of their egregious lies to expose…. They’ve managed to do it every day of my life so far; I have no fear of them missing one…. In the meantime, keep your powder dry, ffolkes, and for goodness’ sake, take off those rose-colored glasses Obama tricked you into donning, and take a look around at how things actually are, rather than how they tell you they are….

Y’know, I just realized, part of the reason I never give up ALL hope that we (humanity) will find a way to survive is summarized in the following pearl, which, I think, speaks to something about which the Asininnies DON’T think often enough… If they did, they’d realize just how fruitless their selfish cowardice is, in the ultimate sense, for they, too, will come up against the one characteristic we all share as part of humanity, to wit: we’re ALL going to die, naked and alone, just like we came in to this world….

“Pale death approaches with an equal step, and knocks indiscriminately at the door of the cottage, and the portals of the palace.” — Horace (65-8 B.C.)
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Well, THAT was something! Exactly what that something might be, I wouldn’t be so bold as to hazard even a guess in jest…. Today’s Pearl may just have reached that state where it defies all description in any usual sense…. Pretty cool, huh? Since I’m a smart guy, I’m leaving it at that…. See ya next time….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid the dubious

We’re giving up all our pornographic coupons for Lent….

Posted on February 24, 2014 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

“Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.” — Albert Einstein

As has been demonstrated in the past, Albert had a pretty well-developed, hell, a finely-honed, very basic and personal sense of humor, with a big streak of Bozo in him, which he was smart enough to recognize, and embrace…. The above is a perfect example of how he could express an incredibly deep, complex philosophical, or even scientific, concept with one pungent, and delightfully amusing statement…. Another he made that I enjoyed was, “After figuring out the configuration of space and time, wearing fuzzy slippers with striped pajamas is a piece of cake.”….. The first time I saw it, I about fell down from laughing so hard….

I also enjoyed one of the statements attributed to his wife… She and Albert were touring one the government’s space flight centers, in Los Angeles, in the early 1950’s…. While touring a part of the day alone with her guide, she asked one of them what a piece of complicated equipment was. He replied, “That’s a machine we use to explore the shape and structure of space and time.” “Oh”, she remarked, “my husband just does that on the back of an envelope….” Brilliant!

So, you might wonder why we are discussing humorous incidents from the life of Albert, and, if you are, you’d be justified in doing so (I always like to provide some affirmation first thing in the morning for my gentle readers… it’s one of the little services we like to give our visitors, gratis….). Of course, that wondering won’t ever be fulfilled, because it’s none of your damn business…. No, that’s a joke, and not true…. Sorry, let’s begin again….

Why are we discussing Albert and his wife? Well, actually, we’re not…. We’re wandering around not really discussing ANYTHING just now, because I’ve again lost control of this intro. That’s not unusual, so we’ll keep plugging away until I get to the point, which is this….

Reality is an illusion, just like Albert sez…. Here at Exploring Consensual Reality, we are dedicated to providing y’all with a version of Reality you may not always be aware of…. I hope….. In doing so, I’m fulfilling my own need to rant, to get this crap out of my head, and onto the screen, in order to maintain what little sanity I have left after so many years of fighting Reality to stay in some sort of shape I could deal with….. The Reality I am describing is consensual, in that we all have to live here together, so we may as well try to get along…. but, that doesn’t always mean it will stay that way….

With that said, we arrive back to Albert’s contention, which tells us that, no matter how little we trust Reality to be what we expect, it will always surprise us anyway, if only by its stubborn insistence on unpredictability, contrasted by its habitual assumption of traditional shapes and patterns… It only does that to lull us into a false sense of security, whereupon it will make drastic changes, right before our eyes…. As one of the most flexible manifestations of the universe at large, it demonstrates our most important lesson in life by its mere existence, and its behaviors….

Learning how to deal with that can take an entire lifetime, if not two or three, so, we should probably get on with our learning sessions, so we can eventually move on to the next level of karmic existence, at some higher plane of Reality…. or, all of what we see is bound by the rules as laid down by the religious dogmatists…. in which case, we’re all up shit creek, and no paddles in sight….

Shall we Pearl?…..

He sees that this great roundabout
The world, with all its motley rout,
Church, army, physic, law,
Its customs and its businesses,
Is no concern at all of his,
And says–what says he?–Caw.

— William Cowper (1731-1800) — The Jackdaw, (Translation from Vincent Bourne)
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It seems the BRC has captured one of the world’s most dangerous drug cartel leaders, El Chapo, the Dude, of the Sinaloa Cartel in Mexico…. I have included below a link to the article announcing the capture, and included below that some “interesting” phrases and words used by the anonymous spokescops (who are never authorized to talk to journalists….. but, they do anyway….)…. The italicized words are the ones I’d like to point out to y’all, with a comment or two about them as an addendum…. Read the story, then, we’ll talk…..

http://www.sfgate.com/news/politics/article/Mexico-captures-Sinaloa-cartel-boss-Chapo-Guzman-5258301.php

“He was caught with an unidentified woman, said one U.S. official, who added that the U.S. Drug Enforcement Administration and the Marshals Service were “heavily involved” in the capture…… A federal law enforcement official said intelligence from a Homeland Security Department investigation also helped lead U.S. and Mexican authorities to his whereabouts…… Both officials spoke on condition of anonymity because they were not authorized to talk to journalists. ….. Mexican authorities, based on a series of arrests in recent months, got wind….. “

“didn’t say how authorities traced him to Mazatlan……” “A U.S. law enforcement official said members of Guzman’s security team helped Mexican and U.S. authorities find him after they were arrested earlier this month. The official was not authorized to discuss details of the case by name and spoke on condition of anonymity.”….. “His arrest followed the takedown of several top Sinaloa operatives in the last few months and at least 10 mid-level cartel members in the last week. The information leading to Guzman was gleaned from those arrested, said Michael S. Vigil, a former senior DEA official who was briefed on the operation.”

Allow me to point out a few little things in this article that give us a little clue as to how things are in the REAL world, where the government has the tools to find and capture ANYONE in the entire world, by the use of their “counter-terrorism” toys, and “executive orders” and the excuse of national security to employ any and all techniques to achieve their purpose, up to, and including torture, lying at will, and the legal clearance to perform their actions in complete darkness, without any public or judicial oversight…..

“an unidentified woman“, said one U.S. official, who added that the U.S. Drug Enforcement Administration and the Marshals Service were “heavily involved”

To my suspicious mind, this suggests the strong possibility that the US DEA and Marshals used an undercover female operative to lure Guzman into an isolated position, where they could take him without dealing with his security forces…. which they did, perfectly…. In several articles I’ve seen, in addition to this one, the same phrase, “an unidentified woman” was used…. Now, do you you REALLY believe she is ‘unidentified’?… I don’t….

intelligence from a Homeland Security Department investigation also helped

Gee, ya think? Homeland Security is authorized to do whatever they want…. Why shouldn’t they share their technology, and some of that unlimited data they are picking up from around the world with anyone who wants it?…. As long as they’re giving it to another group of their insane compatriots, they’ll share it, with pride, even glee, in their own ingenuity, never caring at all about how unethical it is….

Mexican authorities, based on a series of arrests in recent months, got wind….. ” “didn’t say how authorities traced him to Mazatlan.

“Got wind?” Got wind? What the hell does that mean? And, since when do the police go by information they “got wind” of….. Ffolkes, somebody is hiding something here, ya think? It’s obvious they don’t want to let the public know where they are getting their information, although in this case, they give us another clue about that….

members of Guzman’s security team helped Mexican and U.S. authorities

Gosh! That was awfully nice of those fellows…. These hard-boiled, vicious drug cartel security individuals had a complete change of heart, and shared all they knew with Mexican and US authorities, out of the goodness of those hearts, I suppose…. I think it is probably more likely that the word, and technique, “waterboarding” was brought into play, as both a threat, and in actual use… I don’t believe for a minute these guys gave up their boss without a little bit of a struggle…. They come from a culture where “machismo” is paramount, and they would not consider it very macho to talk…. Hence, they were “persuaded to help”, and I don’t think the persuasive techniques used were verbal, or anything other than torture….

How do I come to that conclusion from this article? Easy…. they told us, in so many words….

gleaned from those arrested, said Michael S. Vigil, a former senior DEA official who was briefed on the operation.”

How does one “glean” information from drug cartel security forces? I don’t think it was the promise of some Kool-Aid, ffolkes, do you?…. And, since this mouthpiece was “briefed” on the “operation”, what do YOU think he meant by “gleaned”? I do try NOT to be too naive….

This whole “broken rant” was created for the single purpose of demonstrating how the BRC uses its new toys, provided by us, to wit: you, and me, the not-quite-charmingly naive public, when we allowed them to pass those silly ass Homeland Security bullshit Acts after the 9/11 attacks…. In truth, I don’t really care much that they used it to bring down such a predator…. He was, and is, no doubt, someone we can all do without in our midst, since he insists on preying on the weak and foolish….

But, it seems to me, it was all merely an exercise of domestic discipline, as one set of vicious, insane power-hungry individuals, in the official, authorized, guise of law enforcement myrmidons of the ruling elite, tracked down and captured one of their own type of people, who had the bad taste to try to force his will on others without having the mandate of the public voting apparatus…. When one doesn’t automatically accept the bilge water that is presented to us as the truth, it is easy to see how little difference there is between those who hunted him down, and he who was hunted….

Governments have the backing of the multi-national corporations that control society, whereas the big drug cartels, rich and powerful as they may grow, are merely small businesses compared to them… and, we all know what happens to small business when a mega-corp wants to step into their marketplace…. The pharmaceutical companies don’t like the competition from street drugs, so they keep society amped up in arms against them, so their bottom line profit is not reduced to any significant degree….

The whole War on Drugs, (Y,know? It’s funny how our society’s rulers always deal with a problem by declaring War on it….Then, they throw money at it, and tell people that will make it go away…. Hmm…. how’s that working for ya?….), that has been raging in this country since the mid-1930’s, when the drug companies noticed how popular marijuana was becoming in the mainstream, is merely another example of how the real rulers in society don’t want the people to make their own decision about ANYTHING, not if whatever it is can make money for them….

(It’s why they are making their play for control of the Internet…. It’s a very real, but, still only potential, money cow…. if they can wrest control away, and start charging for access, they’ll essentially control all the information flow…. which also gives them the wherewithal to censor information, before it gets TO the information cloud…. If they keep control in their corporate hands, you can kiss 75% of the Internet’s effectiveness as a social communication tool, free of interference, goodbye….)

Instead, the governments, at the urging of their corporate masters, spread outright lies and mountains of false information through their own media outlets, attempting to convince people of the dangers of (whatever), followed by the passage of legislation making any who decide for themselves into criminals in the eyes of society….. Even though, as in the case with marijuana, what they are fighting against is actually better for people than anything they have in the list of drugs they manufacture, (at a 2000% profit-margin, don’t y’know….), they decided to enlist the government’s influence over the people to make it illegal, since they had no actual way to stop people from finding and using it…. It grows EVERYWHERE on this planet, without much effort…. That’s why they call it a weed, you know?….

Okay, I’ve rambled, and ranted enough for one morning…. Ffolkes, the governments, the BRC, the Asininnies, the shadowy corporate slave masters, or, whatever label you wish to place upon those who actually rule this planet, don’t give a shit about me, or you, and they’re going to continue to do whatever they choose, just as long as we let them…. They make my life, and yours, a hundred times more difficult than it needs to be, all for the sake of maintaining control over the power, and resources, with which they are obsessed. I, for one, am tired of playing their game…. What game?….

“If we let people see that kind of thing, there would never again be any war.” — Pentagon official, on why US military censored graphic footage from the Gulf War

As far as possible, for the remainder of my life, I will be taking every opportunity I find to expose their asininity, their chicanery, their just plain evil intentions, in as loud a voice as I can muster…. I’d appreciate any help I can get in spreading that exposition around to those who need to see it…. Maybe, just maybe, if I can get this idea into the heads of enough reasonably intelligent people, we all will figure out it is time to stop them…. Then, we can join forces, to create of a large enough repository of the power of human will to overcome the physical entrenchments that have already been put into place, for their protection against that very thing….

With enough people, of good loving heart and infinite compassion, all putting their force of will behind whatever we decide is necessary, I’m sure it would be more than enough to turn the tide, and, in the process, maybe, just maybe, we’ll save our own sorry asses from the depredations we have allowed them to perpetrate in our name…..

“For me, all I can do is spit in the eye of my fears by living each day with as much passion and commitment as possible to what truly counts, such as love and justice. To give the into the fear and hopelessness would be to declare defeat, something I am not ready to do while there is still the will to struggle.” — Lawrence Paradis
_____________________________

Whew! That was an epic rant, to be sure…. it just kept growing on me…. Now I need something soothing, with overt hints of extreme beauty, with some irony to spice it up, to realign the wobbly portions of my dubious spirit…. When in doubt, I always prefer to turn to a genius, even, or, in truth, especially a genius whose mind has spent so much time in an alternate version of Reality from the rest of us…. In this woman’s case, she went so far in that direction, she BECAME eight other distinct personalities…. Incredible talent here, ffolkes, all in one whose own mind was more than she could easily handle….

Soliloquy Of The Solipsist

I?
I walk alone;
The midnight street
Spins itself from under my feet;
When my eyes shut
These dreaming houses all snuff out;
Through a whim of mine
Over gables the moon’s celestial onion
Hangs high.

I
Make houses shrink
And trees diminish
By going far; my look’s leash
Dangles the puppet-people
Who, unaware how they dwindle,
Laugh, kiss, get drunk,
Nor guess that if I choose to blink
They die.

I
When in good humor,
Give grass its green
Blazon sky blue, and endow the sun
With gold;
Yet, in my wintriest moods, I hold
Absolute power
To boycott any color and forbid any flower
To be.

I
Know you appear
Vivid at my side,
Denying you sprang out of my head,
Claiming you feel
Love fiery enough to prove flesh real,
Though it’s quite clear
All you beauty, all your wit, is a gift, my dear,
From me.

~~ Sylvia Plath ~~

_____________________________

All things considered, it’s been an interesting morning here at ECR…. I was up a bit late, but, the morning’s routine went smoothly, so I began to write in an unusually comfortable, clear-headed state, an event that, arguably, made the intro as coherent and organized as it is, for a change. The rant above not only went well, it went epic, and quite agreeably, from my standpoint, so, we’re good there, too. I’ve repeated myself with the poem, but, that’s merely a factor of how good it is….

That, of course, brings us to section three, with the obligatory, and, in this case, most welcome, old-school pearl…. We’re shooting today for a seven-star necklace of gems that will make me spew coffee through my nose, from laughing so hard and unexpectedly…. Let’s see what SB can come up with to accommodate us….

“It is most difficult to acquire wisdom without first having survived a whole mine field filled with folly.” — Smart Bee

“I think, therefore, I am.” — Rene Descartes
“I think I think. Therefore, I think I am.” — Smart Bee
“I think I am. That’s close enough.” — gigoid the dubious

“If you are wearing one brown and one black shoe, you have a pair like it somewhere in the closet.” — The Rule of Elderly Survival

“It happens sometimes. People just explode. Natural causes.” — Smart Bee

“Eternity’s a terrible thought. I mean, where’s it all going to end?” — Tom Stoppard, _Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead_

“On one occasion Aristotle was asked how much educated men were superior to those uneducated: “As much,” said he, “as the living are to the dead.” — Diogenes Laertius (c. 200 AD) — Aristotle, xi

“There are worlds out there where the sky is burning and the sea’s asleep and the rivers dream; people made of smoke and cities made of song. Somewhere there’s danger, somewhere there’s injustice, somewhere else the tea’s getting cold. Come on Ace, we’ve got work to do…” — The Doctor, Survival [Last lines of last episode]

It seems Smart Bee had a different agenda than mine…. S’fine…. I like this one better, since I didn’t have to suffer the nasal spew…. I’ll leave you with that image, reluctantly…
_____________________________

“For him who has conquered the mind, the mind is the best of friends; but for one who has failed to do so, his mind will be the greatest enemy.” — Bhagavad Gita (c. B.C. 400)

Not only is this particular assertion difficult to argue against, it doesn’t need any explanation, or enhancement to make it perfect. Hence, it s the natural perfect truth with which to bring this epic Pearl to a merciful close…. I’m beat…. See you tomorrow….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid the dubious

Bedraggled remnants are all that remain….

Posted on February 23, 2014 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

One might think that today’s title was an entry for a contest, or something equally inane(insane?); how else to explain such an outburst of unwanted, uncalled-for alliteration? I’m not sure what came over me, except it SEEMED like the right thing to do at the time…. which, I suppose, could be said to be a rather universal excuse for some people…. We all make mistakes (see: Theory of Bozoid Tendencies….), but, mine are often so egregious, it can take months for me to overcome whatever handicaps I’ve created for myself by giving in to the bulbousness….. This morning’s title may just fit into that category, as it is obviously something thrown together at the last moment, and settled on with reluctance….

In fact, I’m going to make this entire opening a wash, and go change it…. It’s really terrible, and I don’t think I want people to associate my name, or this blog, with such crap…. although why that should bother me NOW, I don’t know… Regardless, it’s got to go… I’ll be right back…. There, much better…. This one has all the characteristics of a decent title, with just a bit of uncertain implication, and some shy uncertainty, to draw in the interest of any readers flashing by…. We’ll go with this one, so forget the first one, & act like it never existed…. which, for you, I suppose, it didn’t, as you never saw it at all…

This, of course, means this intro is now completely off-kilter, and possibly more than just a little confusing…. Since the first paragraph makes references to which you have no connections, and thus, no possibility of ever making any sense of any of it, I’ll just tell you now, FORGET THE DAMN TITLE!…. It never has anything to do with what is in here, and never makes any sense anyway, so trying to fit my titles into some slot isn’t going to work…. they’re just not made for that…. Suffice it to say at this point…. the first title of today’s Pearl was really, really badly done, so I got rid of it, and you’ll never know just what it said, other than knowing all the words began with one letter (outburst of alliteration, yes?)…..

That being said, I think it’s best now if I just give up…. Not forever, just for now, because, let’s face it, this intro is history, in terms of ever becoming what it was supposed to be…. I’m not sure I can even make it work for today’s Pearl, except it HAS to work, because I’m just not going to start completely over, not even at 0405 in the morning…. Not even Murphy can make me do that, hard as he has tried, so, I’m certainly not going to do it to myself…. that would be even more bozoid than is common for me, and not a habit into which I intend to lock myself…. So, we’re going to once again employ emergency method #4 to get us out of this…. That’s the one where I deny everything, ignore the previous paragraphs completely, and just go on, like this…..

Shall we Pearl?….

” The shortest distance between two points is off the wall.” — The Abrams’ Principle
_____________________________

This link is to an article that details some pretty obvious, but, let’s be fair, and call it alleged, political corruption, on the part of a Democratic state legislator…. You can read it, but, it really doesn’t have much to do with the discussion that comes afterward, other than peripherally, as just an extra set of data to add to the whole concept under discussion….

So, not reading it, or waiting until later to get to it, would be acceptable, and, possibly, less confusing…. It can be confusing enough around here without providing any assistance, so, just skip on down to the rant, then, if you wish, you can read later about the naughty California fat-cat politician, and his weak-willed brother….. They’re only willing dupes and/or ignorant pawns in the scenario about which you’ll read below….

http://www.sfgate.com/crime/article/State-Sen-Ron-Calderon-brother-indicted-5256860.php

With the above link, I began collection of a number of links to articles that would demonstrate a point I intended to make regarding the way the administration in current power in Washington DC manipulates the news so efficiently, and so effectively, in terms of fulfilling the agenda THEY have in place for how events should proceed….

Then, I stopped collecting links, and articles, when I realized just how thoroughly the media manipulates itself, as well as the public it purportedly serves, in directions it is not aware of, out of ignorance, lack of cohesive communication, and an unfortunate tendency to avoid what makes them uncomfortable…. along with not being smart enough to see what stares them right in their own faces…. I realized this entire process is so entrenched in society, we aren’t even aware of it most of the time, which is how the SCSM’s like it….

http://blog.sfgate.com/nov05election/2014/02/21/judge-on-muslim-surveillance-any-harm-is-the-medias-fault/

See? It’s the media’s fault…. so says a judge, firmly in the pocket of the corporate masters…. Now, even those who decide what gets into the news are being manipulated, by those who own EVERYTHING, (aka, the SCSM’s, the Shadowy Corporate Slave Masters….), said manipulation having just one primary purpose, to keep their existence, and the machinations with which they control society, OUT of the public eye…. If a majority of the common people, to wit: the public, ever realized exactly how FEW are those who control 99% of all the resources on this planet, and the degree of power those few possess over the rest of us, in their insane quest to control it all, those few people wouldn’t stand a rat’s chance in a colony of cats….

The true rulers of mankind, the shadowy mega-corporate slave masters, who control virtually ALL the money and resources in the world, if unmasked, and made to acknowledge their crimes against humanity, committed over thousands of years, in their selfish quest for power, would be be hunted down and ripped limb from limb, slowly, by angry mobs, wherever they were revealed, all over the world…. a risk of which they are well aware ….

These are SMART, ruthless, self-centered people, who have absolutely NO compassion, or concern for the rights of anyone outside their immediate circle, and they’ve had long years of practice at hiding their existence, and their actions, from the general public’s eye…. The actual number of people in this clandestine group of mega-rich individuals is actually far smaller than 1% of the total world’s population, so few, their very lack of numbers makes all of what they’ve accomplished that much more of a risk for them….

They are fully aware of the danger of having their nefarious activities exposed to the public eye; they take extreme care to never let their faces become known, or, if so, only in ways that would fool the public into believing they are saintly philanthropists, making them beloved by the people for their generosity…. Long, drawn-out, agonizing, vicious, inhumanly torturous deaths would be their lot, should the downtrodden poor, and the ignorant, delusional middle classes, ever find out the truth of their slavery…. which would only be right, given their willingness to use the same violent methods as part of their own bag of tricks, which they are all-too-willing to employ, in service of their need to dominate….

Hence, as it stands today, we have their centuries-long charade, to keep themselves, and what they do to keep their control of events, from ever becoming common knowledge…. If such knowledge became known to the world at large, it would mean their death, for certain, and they know it….. But, I don’t think they’re too worried, at this point….

They have too much control over what people see, and hear, in terms of what is actually taking place in the world…. These people control governments, newspapers, corporations, television networks, and every channel of communication present in the world…. Even the Internet is under their control, as they have the power to shut it down, whenever they wish…. As we were taught by Muad ‘Dib, true power is the ability to destroy what is necessary to survive….

But, the use of such extreme force isn’t necessary for them to employ, yet, as they also have the resources to employ as many idiots writing for their side, as there are people such as myself, writing to try to expose their evil to the light of day….. Hence, the message I, and others like me, try to send is diluted before anyone ever sees it…. Simple enough, from their point of view, but, then, they wouldn’t have allowed the advent of the ‘Net, if they thought it would be their undoing….

Having the Internet may help us, though, by increasing our own abilities, and opportunities, to spread information, even if the odds of their winning, as they have for so many millennia, are not appreciably altered…. Mankind has always been under the clandestine control of these assholes…. That’s why we are in the mess we’re in…. So, let THEM figure out how to survive what even they don’t understand….. I don’t think they have any clue as to the Hell they have unleashed on themselves by not accepting the reality of global warming, and I’m almost looking forward to seeing it hit them, and watching them cry like babies when they understand what they’ve done to themselves….

They’ve done to us all, I know, but, they won’t care about that, so, I’ll take my pleasure from knowing they’ll suffer worse than the rest of us, because it is they, themselves, who MUST face up to reality, and not having a choice in that is something at which they have no experience at all…. I won’t feel any better, but, it will help make it more palatable, to know they’re going down, too…. This is a situation their sense of entitlement, (which, like any such emotion, isn’t going to alter reality…), isn’t going to get them out of having to face up to in the end….

“A duty dodged is like a debt unpaid; it is only deferred, and we must come back and settle the account at last.” — Joseph F. Newton

Whether anyone, 99%er, or 1%er, likes it, or not, this is what I would call a universal truth, in that, for us humans, it comes true, universally, whenever it is tested in reality….. Translated into more simple, more specific terms… whether we like it or not, our account with reality on this planet is about to come due, and it WILL be settled…. Like it or not, we WILL be judged, according to whether or not our duty to the planet has been met, or deferred until now…..

Since, to my way of thinking, the people who made the decisions about how the resources were used are the ones who assumed the duty, they should be the ones to answer…. Unfortunately, ALL of us have to answer for what they’ve done, because they, being the cowards they are, won’t ever take responsibility for it…. They’ll still reap their share of the reward, because reality knows who is responsible; NOBODY skips out on their bill in this restaurant…. I don’t think they’re going to enjoy their reward, though….

“I had a friend who was a clown. When he died, all his friends went to the funeral in one car.” — Steven Wright
_____________________________

I am fully aware this is not a poem….. but, it doesn’t have to be if it doesn’t want to….. It’s a leftover piece of my history, which I, along with many young people, discovered during the 60’s, when the piece experienced a revival of interest, fifty years after it was written, by the Hippies, such as myself, who embraced this somewhat naive manifesto as part of the philosophy of love and peace they developed during those turbulent years…. You can consider this, if you wish, as an example of “pulling my covers” as a closet romantic, and a hopeless optimist, who believes we humans are filled with such beauty of spirit, the universe will not allow us to perish…. It’s a fantasy, I know, but, hey, it FEELS better than all the doom and gloom in which I normally engage around here…. So, enjoy this little break from the heaviness, and take this to heart…. It’s naive, and somewhat unschooled, but, it’s all good advice, for sure…..

Desiderata

(1927)

“Go placidly amid the noise and haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all
persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and ignorant; they too have their story. Avoid loud and aggressive persons, they are vexations to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain and bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time. Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism. Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is as perennial as the grass. Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be. And whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace with your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be careful. Strive to be happy.”

~~ Max Ehrman ~~

_____________________________

I’ve gone and screwed the pooch again, but, that’s neither here nor there…. it’s merely for me to note, and try to fix…. Any whom, here we are, once again, all the way in section three, with a rant under our belts, and a decent entry for section two, in spite of its less than perfect rhyming patterns…. which are especially apparent, since it ISN’T a poem…. S’okay, though, cuz I don’t give a shit, mostly…. We’ve gotten this far, nobody is bleeding, and we haven’t had to call for any expert help for ANY of the usual reasons; I’m happy with how it’s gone so far, and you should be as well, whether you realize it, or not….

All of this blather and dross is merely a fill-in, you know, as the time for actual work approaches…. In fact, it’s approaching at such a rate as to make me quite nervous, so, I’m going to drop all the pretenses, and get on with this pearl…. It will be, naturally, an old-school pearl, without parameters, other than a vague desire to laugh…. at myself, at the world, at y’all, I don’t care…. Let’s see what Smart Bee can find today, shall we?…..

OPTIMIST, n. A proponent of the doctrine that black is white.

A pessimist applied to God for relief.
“Ah, you wish me to restore your hope and cheerfulness,” said God.
“No,” replied the petitioner, “I wish you to create something that would justify them.”
“The world is all created,” said God, “but you have overlooked something — the mortality of the optimist.”

— Ambrose Bierce, “The Devil’s Dictionary”

“Govern a family as you would cook a small fish – very gently.” — Chinese Proverb
(This truism is also applicable to governing a nation…..)

“I contend that we are both atheists. I just believe in one fewer god than you do. When you understand why you dismiss all the other possible gods, you will understand why I dismiss yours.” — Stephen Roberts

“Abstain from beans; that is, keep out of public offices, for anciently the choice of the officers of state was made by beans.” — Plutarch (46-120 AD) — Of the Training of Children

“It’s green.” — Scotty
(Yep. It sure is….)

— How many dead politicians does it take to change a light bulb? As many as possible. — Smart Bee

— Bother! said Pooh, as a woozle bit his bottom. — Hoop (Pooh’s evil twin….)

The process of creating pearls remains a mystery, as does the point of many of them, such as this one, whose meaning has reached levels of obscurity previously unknown to mankind…. But, hey, it all SOUNDS really cool, doesn’t it? And it’s so pretty!…. Well, maybe not, but, it really does have a point, and, it really isn’t ALL that obscure…. But, if I don’t create a little confusion, where would the fun be for any of us?….. Hah! Gotcha there, didn’t I?….
_____________________________

Beneath this stone lies Murphy,
They buried him today,
He lived the life of Riley,
While Riley was away.

I found the above in Smart Bee, just as I was finishing up the pearl in section three…. I almost soiled myself in excitement, until I realized it probably was just a joke…. Boy, though, wouldn’t THAT be good news?…. Any who, I think I’ve done as much damage as possible for one morning, so, I’m wrapping this up, just like a piece of fish, and taking it to the marketplace to try to get rid of it….. Wish me luck, ‘kay? See you tomorrow, with a bit of luck….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid the dubious

Freeze-dried chipmunks? No,thanks, we prefer ferrets….

Posted on February 22, 2014 by gigoid

Ffolkes,

“For a true master,
Sitting on a throne
Is no different than
Sitting on dirt.”

— Deng Ming-Dao

This is what I would consider a perfect pearl…. Short, sweet, to the point, and deep as Rush Limbaugh’s bigotry…. which is mighty deep, as he demonstrates so well on a daily basis…. I like it especially because it expresses a point of virtue, one that most people don’t want to have to accept…. It sometimes amazes me how people can lose touch with the more basic parts of life, such as, well, dirt….

It cracks me up to see young mothers panicking when their kids get dirty, even though I shouldn’t laugh at such ignorance, but should rather try to educate…. I suppose the whole idea of dirt being bad for us is another example of how just a little bit of knowledge can get one in trouble, if the individual hasn’t learned yet to try to learn anything BEYOND what they are initially told by someone in authority…. This whole believing authority business, as you can see, has its own drawbacks, as those who are in the habit of accepting what a TV pundit says unequivocally may often find themselves dealing with a LACK of sufficient knowledge to deal with whatever the problem may be.

So, these young mothers hear one phrase, “dirt has germs”, and without any further information, make their decisions based on this incomplete picture, which doesn’t tell even HALF the story of germs, and how they can affect us…. In fact, just hearing that much gives a FALSE picture, as the truth of the matter is that the more we expose our children to the dirt on this planet, the better off they are, as they will develop the proper defenses against the germs that ARE present, by exposure to them….. If the body isn’t exposed to the germs, it doesn’t learn how to fight it off….

I had a bad case of the flu at a young age (10), which, miserable as it kept me for a week, taught my immune system how to fight those particular kinds of bacteria very well…. Well enough that I haven’t had a single case of the flu since, no matter how virulent the current year’s mutation has been…. my body has the proper defenses to keep it at bay….

Now that we have wandered so far afield right out of the gate, I’d best try to bring this back around to some point we can dive from…. I’m not sure just how I got off on that tangent…. I hadn’t really intended to start writing about immune systems first thing…. I guess the quote from Deng Ming Dao got me thinking…. See? I told you it was a perfect pearl…. I think maybe we should find some more, and see what they can do for us, in the way of illumination, elucidation, and edification of our spirits….

Shall we Pearl?…..

Chaos of thought and passion, all confused;
Still by himself abused or disabused;
Created half to rise, and half to fall;
Great lord of all things, yet a prey to all;
Sole judge of truth, in endless error hurled,–
The glory, jest, and riddle of the world.

— Alexander Pope (1688-1744) — Essay on Man, Epistle ii, Line 13
_____________________________

“Alienation without must be accompanied by alienation within; that is the law for every social level, even individuals. To harm one’s fellows, even one’s enemies, harms you, takes away some essential element from your self-respect and self-image.” — Greg Bear

“In keeping with my non-Aristotelian or relativist-Existentialist bias, I do not classify ideas as simply “true” or “false.” I prefer to assign them probabilities, on a scale from 0 (the Aristotelian “false”) to 10 (the Aristotelian “true”). A rating of 5 means that I am still sitting geometrically on the middle of the fence, above 5 means that I presently lean somewhat toward belief and below 5 means that today I lean somewhat toward finding no value in this gloss at all (for me). I admit cheerfully that I am such an advanced case of Aggravated Agnosticism that whenever I do move something into 0 or 10, I get nervous, wonder if I am becoming as simple-minded as the Pope or Dr. Carl Sagan and start looking for evidence to move that meme toward 1 or 9. — Robert Anton Wilson, in the Introduction to his play “Wilhelm Reich in Hell”

Of late, I’ve been wondering why I rant so much about the world’s problems, or, as Jimmy Buffet expressed it so eloquently, why have I spent so much of my life, “looking for answers, to questions, that bothered him so….”? (from his song, “A Pirate Looks at Forty”….) Back a couple of years ago, about half-a-year after starting this blog, I guess I had been thinking along the same lines, as I wrote the following little piece, for a Pearl in the Five-Star Format that I was using at the time, with five shorter but more pungent and wide ranging sections to each daily Pearl, each section based on its own pearl.

This post, providentially found by the WP related-post bot, provides me with a ready reference list for any of the subjects that need to be addressed in today’s world, if we are ever to grow up and reach our maturity as a species…. It’ll be handy, just in case I’m having trouble, in the mornings, coming up with something toward which I can turn the poison in my pen….

At this point in time, two years in the future, I can see that, not only have we made very little progress at resolving any of the listed issues, there are several that could be added to the list that have surfaced in the intervening years. Since doing so will depress me, I’m not even going to think about the additions, until AFTER reading the list as it is…. At the other end, I’ll add some issues that I have seen come up in the period since this was posted…..

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

From April 2, 2012, on the very day the world’s most famous author of unknown works, Anonymous, assumed the new user name of Smart Bee….. Well, that’s what we call him/her on this blog…. :

“Conscious is when you are aware of something and conscience is when you wish you weren’t.” — Smart Bee (Anonymous, by any other name, smells as sweet…)

Insane politicians (is there another kind?). Human trafficking. Racism. Bigotry. Child abuse. Spousal abuse. Slavery. Crack cocaine, heroin, morphine, or other drug abuse. War on crime. War on women. Televangelists. Fundamentalist zealots. National Security Agency. FBI. CIA. Untold trillions of dollars of national debt. Genetically modified food. Military Industrial Complex. The 1%/99% Society. Taxes. Global warming. Air pollution. The oceans are dying. Terrorism. Nuclear accidents. Massive global weather changes. Ozone depletion. Overpopulation. AIDS. Mutating viruses. The Bohemian Club. Reaganomics. Nationalism. Elitism. Illuminati Conspiracy. Women’s reproductive rights. Bill of Rights (or rather, loss of same). War on the US Constitution. Rampant ignorance. Lawyers. Priests. Rabbis. Imams. Puppy mills. Wall Street. Corporate personhood. The IRS. Insane politicians. (Did I say that already? Well, it deserves mentioning twice….) Rising incidence of halitosis.

Except for the last, which is more of a personal foible, I’d say that’s a fairly extensive, and mostly complete, list of stuff I am aware of that I wish I weren’t….. all right off the top of my head, no research. It certainly keeps my sense of outrage in good shape….. which is why we all need to practice the following sentiment at every opportunity…. otherwise, we are all going to be up Shit Creek without a paddle, proverbial or otherwise…..

“Speak out. You’ve got to speak out against the madness.” — Steven Stills

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Back in the Future: 2/22/14

Here are some additions to the list, also taken off the top of my head…. which, to me, is possibly the most depressing part of this pearl, to know that I am so tuned in to what is wrong in the world, and that there is just so FUCKING MUCH of it I see that is, simply, Evil, and even more sadly, Useless….. Some of these are repeats, as the issues haven’t been resolved, or seen any progress toward resolution….

More NSA. Edward Snowden. Gun control madness on both sides of the question. Corporate shenanigans of every ilk. Bank convictions, for crimes against customers, for which minuscule fines are paid, and nobody goes to jail. Sexual slavery/Abuse of Women (continued….). Abuse of Children. Abuse of Animals. Abuse of the Disabled. Abuse of Humanity. Human rights violations. Pedophiliac priests, enabled by pedophiliac bishops and cardinals. Mass extinction of animal, insect, and plant species due to pollution by Man. Religious fanatics using government positions to further insane fundamentalist agendas…. Signs of societal breakdown as seen in epidemics of bullying, flash mobs, new, increasingly bizarre psychiatric disorders, loss of manners, loss of any sense of honor, divorce rates, increases in prison populations, and numerous other obvious signs of a distressed, decayed culture….

I could sit here for hours, and never stop coming up with more stuff that adds to the evidence of such a complete lack of morality and organization, all of it merely more evidence that we are virtually guaranteed to see the eventual complete breakdown of society, and the impending extinction of our species, along with many others, from the increasingly irreversible toxic effects of global warming, and over-population…. all off the top of my head….

Goodness only knows what could happen if I tried to codify this evidence, using researched statistics and scientific study results…. Maybe, if the list got long enough, and scary enough, someone would listen….. I kind of doubt it, though….. According to all the overt indications, and, all the covert, ‘between-the-lines’ evidence that exists, for those with the wit to perceive it, well…. it all says that nobody has heard any of this yet, and nobody is at all likely to hear what I’m trying to say in the future…. because, nobody WANTS to accept what is right in front of their faces….

That happens a lot with the Truth…. ever notice?…..

“We believe that an informed citizenry will act for life and not for death.” — Albert Einstein on atomic energy, Jan. 22, 1947

If Albert could be so wrong, what hope is there for the rest of us?….

FOOL, n. A person who pervades the domain of intellectual speculation and diffuses himself through the channels of moral activity. He is omnific, omniform, omnipercipient, omniscient, omnipotent. He it was who invented letters, printing, the railroad, the steamboat, the telegraph, the platitude and the circle of the sciences. He created patriotism and taught the nations war — founded theology, philosophy, law, medicine and Chicago. He established monarchical and republican government. He is from everlasting to everlasting — such as creation’s dawn beheld he fooleth now. In the morning of time he sang upon primitive hills, and in the noonday of existence headed the procession of being. His grandmotherly hand was warmly tucked-in the set sun of civilization, and in the twilight he prepares Man’s evening meal of milk-and-morality and turns down the covers of the universal grave. And after the rest of us shall have retired for the night of eternal oblivion he will sit up to write a history of human civilization. — Ambrose Bierce, “The Devil’s Dictionary”
_____________________________

I suppose one of the reasons I continue to rant, in spite of how obviously my heavy-handed approach is driving readers away, is that I am a sucker, a patsy, when it comes to people…. I AM one, and, I can’t help but love them, and feel badly that there is so much pain and misery in our world, all caused by such a small percentage of assholes, who seem to not care at all about other people….

Often, I fantasize, dreaming of how I would like to treat some of the corporate sharks, misogynist politicians, peodphiliac priests, or overly-entitled myrmidons, if I had them in a position where I could “educate” them a bit…. Sadly, my fantasies probably resemble the torture they put us through, as I tend to be a bit vengeful when I think about the lack of compassion, or connection to other humans, these asininnies show every day.

Since it would be unethical to treat them as they treat others, (I have NO wish to resemble them in ANY way….), I find myself at an impasse, with frustration mounting as I observe the world at the mercy of these assholes…. Since I have, thus far, refused to buy a gun, lest I give in to the temptation to use it, I turn to poetry, to try to find a moment of peace among all the reasons to feel anxious about the future…. On a good day, like today, I’ll find something like this…..

No Man Is An Island

No man is an island,
Entire of itself,
Every man is a piece of the continent,
A part of the main.
If a clod be washed away by the sea,
Europe is the less.
As well as if a promontory were.
As well as if a manor of thy friend’s
Or of thine own were:
Any man’s death diminishes me,
Because I am involved in mankind,
And therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls;
It tolls for thee.

~~ John Donne ~~

_____________________________

Having thus completed the obligatory rant, and poem, we will now turn to the old-school for our final section today, as is our habit…. Smart Bee has been a bit unpredictable this morning, with a lot of dross thrown out along with the good stuff…. But, I trust it to use its own good judgment, so I’ll let it set its own parameters today, and trust it will find some pearls of good luster for us to consider….

Ah, wait a second…. You there, in the floral print shorts…. your mask is cracked; you’ll need to replace it from the spares before you jump in…. Don’t want to have that go out on you at a depth of 30 feet, do we?…. No, we don’t…. Got it? Everybody got their knives, for any stray barracuda that show up? Okay, let’s go for a dive, ffolkes, and find some oysters….

“As good almost kill a man as kill a good book: who kills a man kills a reasonable creature, God’s image; but he who destroys a good book kills reason itself.” — John Milton (1608-1674) — Areopagitica

“The world is full of fools, and he who would not see it should live alone and smash his mirror.” — Claude le Petite

“Men know that if a woman had to choose between catching a fly ball and saving an infant’s life, she would probably save the infant’s life, without even considering whether there were men on base.” — Dave Barry

SATIRE, n. An obsolete kind of literary composition in which the vices and follies of the author’s enemies were expounded with imperfect tenderness. In this country satire never had more than a sickly and uncertain existence, for the soul of it is wit, wherein we are dolefully deficient, the humor that we mistake for it, like all humor, being tolerant and sympathetic. Moreover, although Americans are “endowed by their Creator” with abundant vice and folly, it is not generally known that these are reprehensible qualities, wherefore the satirist is popularly regarded as a soul-spirited knave, and his ever victim’s outcry for co-defendants evokes a national assent.

Hail Satire! be thy praises ever sung
In the dead language of a mummy’s tongue,
For thou thyself art dead, and damned as well —
Thy spirit (usefully employed) in Hell.
Had it been such as consecrates the Bible
Thou hadst not perished by the law of libel.
Barney Stims

— Ambrose Bierce, “The Devil’s Dictionary”

“Any man who afflicts the human race with ideas must be prepared to see them misunderstood.” — H. L. Mencken

“Life is not the way it is supposed to be. It is the way it is. The way you cope with it is what makes the difference.” — Virginia Satir

Sometimes, SB outdoes itself, and this is one of those times…. A brilliant pearl, almost a necklace, it’s so well constructed…. If I were you, ffolkes, I’d spend a bit of time, if necessary, in decoding the message this pearl delivers…. Not only will it be on the Quiz when it is given, you will find yourself enjoying the process of finding the encryption algorithm…..
_____________________________

Perhaps it is because I wrote this, but, I like it…. That being the case, I’m going to go with my instincts, and let this go out as it is, and not fret over any possible consequences…. It’s a bit like life, in that metaphorical sense…. which is, after all, what we do here, play with our metaphorical senses…. See ya tomorrow, ffolkes, if they give me another chance….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid the dubious

Salting hummus makes it nearly edible….

Posted on February 19, 2014 by gigoid

SPOILER: The following introductory section contains an unusually powerful potential to affect the reader soporifically, without warning; should you find yourself yawning, or your eyelids becoming heavy and hard to blink, go immediately on to the second section, where oxygen will be provided….

Our apologies for any inconvenience this may cause in the consumption of today’s Pearl; it was unavoidable, as the intro was done before its strong, almost narcotic, sleep-inducing qualities were noted and recorded…. Fortunately, it was discovered during the proofing, (when I found myself nodding over the keyboard…) which prompted this warning….

I find, if you don’t hold your breath while reading the intro, and just treat it like the preface of a book you are about to read (which nobody ever does read…. the prefaces, that is….), and go on to the meat of today’s offering…. you can make it through without any difficulty, other than a vague, mild nausea…. Best of luck!….

Ffolkes,

And, when I woke up…. I looked around, only to find nothing had changed while I slept. More’s the pity…. Of course, I’m speaking only of the situation outside of my own little corner of reality…. In my corner, I have things nicely arranged, just the way I like them, with Patricia nearby, and nobody else (well, other than my children, and the odd old friend or two….) who has any claim on my time, or my attention…. This means that I can spend my time pursuing my own American Dream, which involves books, excellent coffee, the possibility of love, puppies, kittens, cannabinoids, and no bad food…. With the time I have left on this old ball o’mud, life’s too short to put up with anything else….

Anything beyond those are what I consider a bonus, but,those listed are essential to my personal well-being, items I am unwilling to go without for very long before becoming quite irritable, whereupon I generally find someone to sink my teeth into, for sublimation purposes…. It works for me, though I do have to keep a lawyer on retainer to deal with the occasional bout of antagonistic litigation. It also gets a bit expensive having to keep so much material handy for bandaging, and stopping blood flow; and, don’t ASK about the trash bill!….. Do you know what they charge now for hazardous bio-waste?…. It’s outrageous!….

If I haven’t said so before, let me now say, I really like being retired…. I didn’t think I would, but, as things have worked out, it’s a lot more comfortable than I’d thought, if you don’t count the physical issues that arise from getting older. That’s something we all have to deal with anyway, but, not all of us manage to arrange matters so that we aren’t struggling with poverty when we stop working….

Not having a retirement account is actually a scary, sad idea to consider, as I know several people my age who DON’T have a solid retirement set up, and must continue working in order to live; I was almost caught without a retirement in place, so I know the panicky feeling that comes from not knowing if you will be able to retire, with enough to live on comfortably, or have to keep plugging away at a job in order to eat, and sleep indoors…. As I approached my 55th birthday, I was in that boat; no job, and not enough time in to keep my retirement active with the State, so I was looking at NOT having anything in place when I reached the age to retire….

I guess I’m winding around this issue like this to get to the point where I can say this: I’m a lucky guy…. I managed to get my job with the State back, and reinstated my accumulated time, which reinstated my retirement eligibility, and left me in the position in which I find myself now…. which is a far better position than the majority of the world’s population can look forward to…. I have enough income to live in a warm, dry house, eat well, stay clothed, and have enough left for entertainment and/or travel, if I’m frugal enough to save up…. So, I really have little about which to complain, other than my physical issues, which all of us must bear….

As a man who was raised to be compassionate, and who has learned over the years that service to others is a requirement of maintaining one’s self-respect and honor, I feel like I should give back to society what I can, sharing my knowledge and expertise…. In my lifetime, I’ve learned a lot, and the only way now I have to share what I know is to write…. My physical condition is such that giving of my practical experience, in cooking, organizing, or other skills that are useful, has been curtailed; I can’t work in the kitchen anymore, nor do much that requires standing or sitting for long periods…. So, volunteering at the local senior center, as I’d planned to do, is not an option any longer….

So, I write…. I try to write about subjects that will help us all to survive the upcoming shit-storm…..You know, that impending massive planetary environmental crisis so ignorantly created by our Beloved Ruling Class, in their patently insane search for power and control over others? Yeah, that one…. It ain’t much, but, it’s what I’ve got, so, I’ll keep doing it as long as I can, if only to amuse myself…. If I can amuse someone else in the process, so much the better….

Shall we Pearl?…. With such a mundane, elementally, if elegantly boring intro, I think we need a two-fer to start…..

“He is able who thinks he is able.” — Buddha

“If the Bible proves that God exists then comic books prove the existence of Superman.” — Smart Bee, demonstrating perfectly sound logic
_____________________________

Originally, I had intended to put a rant in this section…. I even had one started, dealing with a plague our society has endured since the beginning of time, but, writing that stiff, boring introduction has put me into a semi-deep depression, for some idiotic reason that my subconscious thinks will be more fun if it hides it from me….

In short, I’ve just been struck by a chemical imbalance in my brain that has created a miasma of karmic blueness, which surrounds my heart and soul, bypassing the brain altogether to make me feel as if the world is covered all in cotton, and nothing feels right…. and I don’t know WHY! It’s just as if a bunch of dementors had been sent to harass me by some perverse, antagonistic Ministry of Magic official…. Really a pisser, actually….

Ah well, it’s fortunate for us I have the perfect solution to this sort of marginally delusional, certainly self-induced emotional abuse…. It’s called an old-school pearl, sans any parameters beyond what pleases the inner eye, dreaming without focus, of peace, and illogical hope for our future…. In other words, potluck…. Enjoy! I intend to… In fact, I may even leave a comment or two, just to show y’all how MUCH I enjoyed it….

“He who receives a good turn should never forget it; he who does one should never remember it.” — Charon

(An obvious corollary to the Golden Rule, and an attitude one could only wish was more common in modern society….)

“It belongs to human nature to hate those you have injured.” — Tacitus (54-119 AD) — Agricola, 42

(Ahem!…. Well!…. I do declare, is it a bit warm in here?…. This certainly goes a long way toward explaining the reason why our Beloved Ruling Class expresses so much hatred and disdain for those who elect them…. as well as how the shadowy corporate slave masters can justify to themselves their insane obsession with money, and power over others….)

“The discipline of desire is the background of character.” — John Locke

“Just remember, when you’re over the hill, you begin to pick up speed.” — Charles Schulz

“One’s friends are that part of the human race with which one can be human.” — George Santayana

(No comments from me could possibly add anything to the last three pearls….. Let’s see if SB can finish this off with the same sort of style and grace….)

POLITICS, n. “A strife of interests masquerading as a contest of principles. The conduct of public affairs for private advantage.” — Ambrose Bierce, The Devil’s Dictionary

“Thou shalt not get caught.” — The Eleventh Commandment

Hmm…. well, perhaps the ending didn’t quite live up to the rest of it…. But, when looked at in a certain light, one can see how that may well just be the best description of how human life stumbles along the way it does…. Then again, maybe not…. At this point, all of that is moot, and we are now free to go enjoy a poem…. Plus, the quicker we get out of this section, the faster it will fade into memory, yes?….
_____________________________

I don’t know this poet, having never seen his work before…. though for some reason, this poem sounds familiar…. In any case, it’s good, if a bit obscure as to what it wants from the reader; I found it hard to connect to the emotions that so obviously were part of the shock of the ending. Perhaps that’s a sign of a good poem; it made me think about my own reaction to what it had to say….

Richard Cory

Whenever Richard Cory went down town,
We people on the pavement looked at him:
He was a gentleman from sole to crown,
Clean favored, and imperially slim.

And he was always quietly arrayed,
And he was always human when he talked;
But still he fluttered pulses when he said,
‘Good-morning,’ and he glittered when he walked.

And he was rich – yes, richer than a king –
And admirably schooled in every grace:
In fine, we thought that he was everything
To make us wish that we were in his place.

So on we worked, and waited for the light,
And went without the meat, and cursed the bread;
And Richard Cory, one calm summer night,
Went home and put a bullet through his head.

~~ Edwin Arlington Robinson ~~

_____________________________

As a reward for hanging in there long enough to get this far, I’m not going to rant at all today…. Instead, here’s another fresh old-school pearl…. Let’s see if Smart Bee can come up with anything to lighten my depression, and give y’all a chuckle or two with your morning coffee, tea, or beverage of choice…. Myself, I advise NOT having any morning conversations with either of my old friends, John Daniels, or James Beam…. Nice fellows, but, as breakfast companions, they tend to eliminate any prospect of accomplishing anything worthwhile afterward, for most of the rest of the day, after which, there remains the altogether unpleasant consequences to suffer through, as one recovers from the usual vicious hangover that comes with such foolishness…

As is apparent, I’ve been there, done that, and have no wish to go back, much as I love my old friends…. I’ll confine myself to shorter, more manageable conversations with them late at night, or before dinner, and leave it at that…. In the meantime, I got completely side-tracked…. Let’s see how amusing Smart Bee can be, shall we?….

“If at first you don’t succeed, you’re doing about average.” — Leonard Levinson

— Bother! said Pooh, as his ship failed to jump to light speed.

A mighty creature is the germ,
Though smaller than the pachyderm.
His customary dwelling place
Is deep within the human race.
His childish pride he often pleases
By giving people strange diseases.
Do you, my poppet, feel infirm?
You probably contain a germ.

— Odgen Nash (1902-1971)

“Believing ourselves to be possessors of absolute truth degrades us: we regard every person whose way of thinking is different from ours as a monster and a threat and by so doing turn our own selves into monsters and threats to our fellows.” — Octavio Paz

(How did that slip in there?…. Hmm, sorry, it’s not remotely funny….. It’s also too good to toss away; such insight is rare…. Oh well, just imagine it’s funny, and go on…. I’ll make it right with the gods of consistency….)

“Sits he on ever so high a throne, a man still sits on his bottom.” — Smart Bee

(That’s better…. since we aren’t counting the fourth pearl, we’ll go with a three-fer to finish this off nice and balanced-like, just like the professionals do….)

“I spent 3 weeks childproofing my home. They still get in.” — Smart Bee

“It has been determined that most teenage girls lose their virginity during the summer months. This stands to reason, since congress is recessed at that time.” — Smart Ass Bee

“HELLO, everybody, I’m a HUMAN!!” — Zippy the Pinhead

(It appears that balance was not going to be an element of note in today’s process…. but, I’m okay with that, especially if you consider the last line as the underlying battle cry for today’s effort…. )
_____________________________

I swear, pulling out a coherent thought today has been like trying to pull a Tea Partier’s head out of his ass…. It’s hard work, and ultimately useless, in terms of improving his chances of reaching average intelligence; in other words, there’s no hope of making them smarter, so, they’re usually better off leaving it there… I figure if somebody is a registered Tea Partier, it’s a pretty sure sign they already lost the evolutionary lottery…. It’s why I’m usually nice to them; they’re to be pitied more than reviled, as being too naive to ever really have stood a chance to learn enough to make themselves anything than the malleable mind-slaves of the BRC they are…..

There, now I’ve ranted…. Are you happy? Good. Me too, and I know why both of us have reason to be so giddy…. We’re done here, and we can afford to let go of our death grip on sanity long enough to relax for a while…. Until tomorrow, ffolkes….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid the dubious

gigoid

Ned Moore, aka gigoid, is a 70 year-old, (!!!… When did that happen?….), retired dilettante, who would rather read than eat, most days. His first blog, "gigoid’s folly", has been emailed out to folks he knows for about 18 years now. He still considers it his best defense against angst, and the ever-present specter of sheer insanity..... Due to rigorous curmudgeon training requirements, he has discontinued his Facebook presence, but still indulges in the occasional Twitter session... In essence, he's socialized, but, not overly sociable; all labels and stereotypes are forbidden in his presence... and he doesn't care what anyone thinks about that..... In fact, he doesn't want to talk anymore.... If you feel you MUST contact gigoid, his email address is: alphagigoid@gmail.com You can go read now.... Go on, beat it.... gigoid, the dubious

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