Tag Archives: Reality

We were hoping for more of a gestalt version….

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Ffolkes,

“…. crawfish pie, filet gumbo…”  Can’t say why, but that song is stuck in my head this morning…. “…. gonna have big fun, on the bayou.” I must have been dreaming in Acadian, or something….. There’s a word, a good word, Acadian, another word lifted from another language by English, used to describe the group of folks who settled in Louisiana in the early 1800’s.  Their culture, brought with them from France, melded into the mix of English,
Spanish, Indian, and African cultures that already flourished in the New Orleans area, producing what we now call Cajun food, music, and culture. (“Cajun” is a bastardization of the way the word “Acadian” comes through into English…. When pronounced correctly, it sounds like ‘a cajiun”, which, on the naturally lazy tongues of the new worlders, became “cajun”…..)

Now that the trivia portion of today’s post is finished, I’m left again in the lurch, with no intro planned. I could play my guitar for a while, and maybe sing y’all a song, but, I don’t really want to scare anyone away so early. Not that I’m terrible, it’s just that, so early in the day, my musical taste is a bit suspect; I’ve been known to listen to Mendelssohn, or Bach, for hours on end, and I don’t think y’all are ready to go back to sleep just yet, are you? I thought not…. Besides, I don’t do opera….

That does leave me adrift again, though…. Hmm…. now where shall I go to hide the fact that I am a poseur? That I am incapable of true creation, and all of my ambition to be a writer is a fool’s errand. I spend a lot of effort to keep it from becoming commonly known, but, days like today make it hard to keep it under my hat. If only I was ruthless, or politically minded, or had no shame at lying to people; then I could run for a public office, and make my living from the public trough. Unfortunately, I have lots of ruth,  no political ambition, and often break into hives when I lie, so, being a politician is out of the question….

If there was a way to start all this over again, without having to toss out what is already done, well, that would be good, and would save me a lot of headache…. No such luck exists, however, so, I’m stuck with this, and haven’t a clue as to what to do to salvage what’s left, of what started out as a perfectly good intro… one that turned so swiftly to crap, I almost didn’t see it happen….. I suppose I could recycle it; we are encouraged to re-use old stuff, but, I don’t think this will stand up to a second use. It’s liable to turn rogue on us, and injure someone in its death throes…. No, recycling old intros is a pastime rife with danger, and we’ll have none of it here….

Oh well, I’m going to have to once again resort to the whimsical methods I’ve used so effectively in the past, to amaze, to entertain, to educate, and, ultimately, to confuse the reading public, or, at the very least, those of that group who stumble into this blog, and can’t find their way out…. In other words, voi-fucking-la!  It’s an intro….

It would be quite insane, on the whole, to expect anyone to believe me if I claimed it’s a good one, in its own little way, but, it’s legal, it’s typo-free, and, it’s done, so there isn’t a damn thing to do but let it go out the way it is, and hope for the best….. In this case, I think that if we can get through the day without any further bloodshed, it will be alright…. If not, well, there’s always tomorrow, right?….

Shall we Pearl?…..

— Bother! said Pooh, as the pin fell out of the grenade.
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So, I was sitting here, trying to decide what to do…. rant, pearl, or fake it? Any of the above would be acceptable and appropriate, but, I’m not feeling any of those particularly strongly this morning, so I’m going to cheat…. I was cruising through some old Pearls yesterday, and found some that I enjoyed (God, I hope so!….) Any who, I thought this one was kind of fun, and pretty coherent, on the whole…. Since I’m lazy, and in charge, I’m including it here today, just because I can…. This is from August of 2011, if it matters…..

Ffolkes,
Another day dawns, dammit!  Not really, but that was the first line that ran through my head this morning, so….better out than in, I say…Thus begins another fine day in paradise.

All of us have our secret fears; those little demons from our dreams that escape out into the real world and assault us at those moments we least expect it. How do we deal with it? Me, I’m a champion at denial; I can ignore most problems until they pretty much either give up or solve themselves. The few that aren’t subject to this method do tend to slap me around pretty well, but for the most part, I go along with King Ralph I, who said, “Well, the first thing we should do is order new globes.There’s no problem so big it can’t be ignored if we put our minds to it.”

While ordering new globes won’t help my current batch of woes, a dedicated state of ignorance duly cultivated while asleep can be of great use. In that state, even the news of the day can’t break through to that part of me that will worry over it. I’ve finally figured out that the rest of mankind is on their own; I’m retired, and no longer care about such mundane matters…..so be it…..

“But pain…seems to me an insufficient reason not to embrace life. Being dead is quite painless. Pain, like time, is going to come on regardless. Question is, what glorious moments can you win from life in addition to the pain?” — Lois McMaster Bujold, Barrayar

You may be a king
Or a little street sweeper,
But sooner or later
You’ll dance with the reaper.
— Reaper Rap (Grim Reaper, “Bill & Ted’s Bogus Journey”)

“A wise man first determines what is within his control; all else is then irrelevant.” — Epictetus

“Life is pleasant.  Death is peaceful.  It’s the transition that’s troublesome.” — Isaac Asimov

“Life is a tragedy to those who feel, and a comedy for those who think.” — Jean de la Bruyere

So there you have it…..carefully applied, you too can take comfort in the ready arms of practiced denial….and it only hurts yourself!!! How many things in life can you say that about?…..  Y’all take care out there…..meanwhile, I’m going to try to get my tongue out of my cheek, where it has been firmly lodged for some time now……
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“I’d rather learn from one bird how to sing than to teach ten thousand stars how not to dance.” — ee cummings

The Dragon of Grindly Grun

I’m the Dragon of Grindly Grun,
I breathe fire as hot as the sun.
When a knight comes to fight
I just toast him on sight,
Like a hot crispy cinnamon bun.

When I see a fair damsel go by,
I just sigh a fiery sigh,
And she’d baked like a ‘tater-
I think of her later
With a romantic tear in my eye.

I’m the Dragon of Grindly Grun,
But my lunches aren’t very much fun,
For I like my damsels medium rare,
and they always come out well done.

~~ Shel Silverstein ~~

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Below is another Pearl from the archives, from 2011… It would take at least two paragraphs and several hundred words to tell you the reasons why it is included here today, words I don’t intend to write…. Suffice it to say more than one compelling reason presented itself, so, here it is, for what it is worth…. It’s a pretty good one, all things considered, and could be considered as a bonus, were you so inclined….

Ffolkes,
I think it’s safe to say we all get pretty tired of the political circus as played out here in the USA; it all seems so pointless, until you realize it is directly affecting your own life, then it just gets irritating. Everyone I know has beliefs and convictions, with their own methods of dealing with the world, and their own methods of how to treat other people. Mostly they all get along just fine. Then I look at what is being said in the arena of public discourse, and there doesn’t seem to be any correlation, no connection with what I know is real for most folks.

The avaricious ones, the ones who seek public office, have an entirely different view of reality than most of the Americans I know. Even the conservatives I talk to think differently than the politicians, except for those few who allow the politicians to do their thinking for them, and merely parrot those talking points currently in fashion. It’s unfortunate that there are a LOT of the last category, which is part of the reason why the talking heads are able to maintain their death-grip on the almighty profit margin.

Since the whole point of the above is how sick I am of hearing the nonsense in the news, I won’t rant any further today on that subject. Don’t really feel like ranting anyway; it’s already been a tough morning, and I’d rather turn in a more positive direction. It took over 25 minutes on the phone, but I was able to complete a necessary task this A.M., and I’m using that to act as the driver for the rest of today’s tasks. All of this is just a long, convoluted and obfuscatory way to say, enjoy!……

“Confront them with annihilation, and they will survive; plunge them in a deadly situation, and they will then live. When people fall into danger, they are then able to strive for victory.” — Sun Tzu

Invictus

Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.
In the fell clutch of circumstance,
I have not winced nor cried aloud
Under the bludgeoning of chance;
My head is bloody but unbowed.
It matters not how straight the gate,
How charged with punishment the scroll;
I am the master of my fate,
I am the captain of my soul.

— Henley

I know you think that you understood what you thought I said, but I am not  all that sure that you understand that I seldom say what I think and even less often do I mean what I say.

Don’t say you don’t have enough time. You have exactly the same number of hours per day that were given to Helen Keller, Louis Pasteur, Michelangelo, Mother Teresa, Leonardo da Vinci, Thomas Jefferson, and Albert Einstein.

If you think women are moody and bossy – get a cat.

Come away, O human child!
To the waters and the wild
With a faery, hand in hand,
For the world’s more full of weeping than you can understand.
— William Butler Yeats, “The Stolen Child”

There you go; a little whimsy is good for the soul…..so is epiphany. Y’all take care out there…..
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As a practicing curmudgeon, and a critically acclaimed bozoid, it behooves me to say, at this point, just how proud I am to have been nominated for this award…. Oh, sorry, wrong file…. Okay, here we are…. Well, that was interesting…. Some rather esoteric remnants of sanity being bandied about here, eh? If one didn’t know better, one might think that I had gone around the bend, so far I’ll never find the way back…. but, then, illusion is what it’s all about, now, isn’t it?….

I’m somewhat relieved to find myself here in the closing section of today’s Pearl…. The lines and defining characteristics of reality are starting to become rather blurred and indistinct, due, I’m sure, to the volatile nature of what has been written here today…. We wouldn’t want to get charged for any undue wear and tear on either space, or time, so we’ll call it a day, before it gets any worse…. (Of course, as you can see, it’s already gone off the rails….). Let’s see how it reads….

Well, ffolkes, it’s a Pearl, and there is NO doubt at all about that….. As such, I’m going to take the money and run, before I lose the courage it takes to hit the “Publish” button…. Ta ta, then….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest  Carole…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

dozer3

Pilfered hearts, buried in parody….

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Ffolkes,

It’s tempting…. the urge to just give it up is getting strong, and the reasons to do so are growing more compelling each day. As I sit to write today, I’m struck by how conflicted I am inside, where one part of me wants to fulfill the routine I’ve established over the last two years, and another part wants me to just go back to bed. For those two years, the latter part of me has been meek, unable to have its way very often, if at all, over the big, blustering, powerful urge to spill my guts….. Of late, though, it has gained strength, and weight, and is now able to bring a sense of controversy to these morning battles with myself…..

Obviously, the part of me that is still dreaming in bed has lost again, as the words keep flowing on screen; I guess the meek aren’t inheriting the earth quite yet…. It does, however, create yet another conundrum for me to solve, to wit: what the hell will I do today for an intro section? I’ve used up just about every style there is, or, at least, all I can think of, and none of them have been workable as an every day kind of opening, that would stand up to the test of time. The closest I’ve come is these wandering, blathering personal commentaries, four or five paragraphs discussing the workings of my head, which, though they may be interesting at times, probably get a bit trying to the patience to read often….

I’ve tried fictional openings…. I’ve tried ranting, I’ve tried pearls. I’ve tried to be logical, and I’ve dipped deeply into the well of nonsense to draw up some humor, such as it is. I’ve even used the Keystone Kops method, and, in times of extreme emergency, made things up. Hell, I’ve even considered the use of high explosives, but, I couldn’t get the permits…. Oh well…. I did have high hopes for that one, but, city hall gets nervous at private citizens asking for permission to blow stuff up….

Oh well, by this time, I should know better than to get all worked up about it….. The struggle to decide on what to write about every day will continue, as long as I keep flogging myself to write…. It’s looking like that isn’t going to cease any time in the near future, so, I’ll have to learn to live with a daily battle in my head, at least until I learn how to live with it, and accept it as reality….. That is one answer, in truth….I could be all Zen, and call this process a koan, a learning experience, and realize that it is acceptable just the way it is…. Life is struggle, and cannot be lived without pain. Learning to accept the pain is what eventually causes one to be able to live in harmony, and the pain, along with the struggle, will pass into memory….

Yeah, that’s the ticket…. Zen rules!….. Well, it helps, anyway…. Ah well, it’s happened again, so we’ll take the five paragraphs of relative crap, and go on to the next steps in this dance macabre….

Shall we Pearl?…..

“Work is not an end in itself; there must always be time enough for love.” — Robert Heinlein
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“I put aside my copy of “BOWLING WORLD” and think about GUN CONTROL legislation..” — Zippy the Pinhead

You know, the most amazing thing, to me, about this whole issue with the spying on our telephone and computer data by the government? It is the absolute genuine surprise on the part of the administration at how upset everyone (i.e. the public, or, more simply, “us”…) is over this issue. It’s as if they can’t believe that people are actually upset that the government is collecting all of our phone conversations, and all of our email correspondence, in order to, according to them, “defeat terrorism”.

They, in their absolute confidence in their own rightness, are having a hard time with the fact that NONE of the rest of the populace, at least, none of those outside of the government itself, agrees with them….. For some unknown reason (well, you know it, and I know it, but, they don’t….), they think they can do whatever they want in the pursuit of their imaginary demons, and we’re all supposed to fall right in line with that…. In truth, it makes me feel a little better about things when I think about the reaction by the public; I had almost given up on them ever caring at all what the BRC did to them….

I’m not going to rant again today about this; it’s all over the news, and many people are presenting some well-thought-out, and well-researched and -written articles on the subject, probably much better than I could do. I like to think I’d be funnier, but, that isn’t necessarily of importance to such pieces, so, for now, I’m leaving it to them to distribute the information people need to be clear on the issue. Clarity is necessary, because this is one of the best opportunities we, as the public, have had in some time to bring light to bear on the clandestine activities being perpetrated on us by our supposed leaders….. I think it is important NOT to let them off the hook on this, and bring all the pressure we can to make reforms, at least in this one area….

Rather than rant, though, I will put together another pearl on this subject, because I believe that the more we hold the BRC up for examination, whether that regard is focused on humor, their (absent) virtue, their chicanery, or just their displays of idiocy, it’s a good thing to keep to keep the light focused on them as long as possible. If we don’t hold our leaders, such as they are, up for our criticism of their acts against us, then, who will? They certainly aren’t going to be pulling their own covers, or showing off their latest theft from us; it’s in their best interests to keep as much of that away from our attention as they are able to do. So, I’ll keep on making fun of them, just as long as they keep lying to us….

Therefore, here is another seven-star pearl, with the clear intent of either making fun of, or bringing unwanted exposure to, our Beloved Ruling Class, and all of their myrmidons…. (a great word, go ahead, look it up….) (No, I’m serious, you need to look it up, or the first quote won’t make any sense to you….) (Of course, none of it MAY make any sense, but, I do what I can, and no more….) (Ah, the hell with it, it means, essentially, “faceless minions in vast numbers, set to do their bidding”….)

The Bible is true this I know,
For the Bible tells me so.

— Jordan Henderson

“Do not needlessly endanger your lives until I give you the signal.” — Dwight D. Eisenhower
(One of the first recorded instances of a President using computer programming techniques on the public….)

“An election year is the time politicians want to help us out of all the trouble they got us into in the first place.” — Smart Bee

“Disco oil bussing will create a throbbing Naugahyde pipeline running straight to the tropics from the rug producing regions and devalue the dollar!” — Zippy the Pinhead

“Muddy water let stand becomes clear.” — Lao Tse

“Nothing can now be believed which is seen in a newspaper.” — Thomas Jefferson (1743-1826)

“If life is merely a joke, the question still remains: For whose amusement?” — Smart Bee

Well, there you have it…. I can’t make it any clearer than that….. Well, perhaps I can…. we’ll try later…..
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I only have one thing to say about this morning’s choice of poems…. Take note, for you are reading the work of a genius…..

Reflection On A Wicked World

Purity
Is obscurity.

~~ Ogden Nash ~~

So Does Everybody Else, Only Not So Much

O all ye exorcizers come and exorcize now, and ye clergymen draw nigh and clerge, For I wish to be purged of an urge. It is an irksome urge, compounded of nettles and glue, And it is turning all my friends back into acquaintances, and all my acquaintances into people who look the other way when I heave into view. It is an indication that my mental buttery is butterless and my mental larder lardless, And it consists not of “Stop me if you’ve heard this one,” but of “I know you’ve heard this one because I told it to you myself, but I’m going to tell it to you again regardless,” Yes I fear I am living beyond my mental means. When I realize that it is not only anecdotes that I reiterate but what is far worse, summaries of radio programs and descriptions of cartoons in newspapers and magazines. I want to resist but I cannot resist recounting the bright sayings of celebrities that everybody already is familiar with every word of; I want to refrain but cannot refrain from telling the same audience on two successive evenings the same little snatches of domestic gossip about people I used to know that they have never heard of. When I remember some titillating episode of my childhood I figure that if it’s worth narrating once it’s worth narrating twice, in spite of lackluster eyes and dropping jaws, And indeed I have now worked my way backward from titillating episodes in my own childhood to titillating episodes in the childhood of my parents or even my parents-in-laws, And what really turns my corpuscles to ice, I carry around clippings and read them to people twice. And I know what I am doing while I am doing it and I don’t want to do it but I can’t help doing it and I am just another Ancient Mariner, And the prospects for my future social life couldn’t possibly be barrener. Did I tell you that the prospects for my future social life couldn’t be barrener?

~~ Ogden Nash ~~

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As often is the case at this point, I have no rantable material available for this section…. Oh, subject matter isn’t an issue, only the degree of angst available to drive it to the proper pitch. Anything less than shrill just doesn’t get anyone’s attention, or release enough of the angst for duty elsewhere…. Such is life, as we say in the blog world (like that is an actual place, with inhabitants, and all that implies….).  What this means in terms of reality is another pearl of a random nature…. I’ll see what Smart Bee starts off with; that will provide me with a search parameter. Then, when I’ve got an idea in mind, I’ll do a fast cruise through the dB, and pick out the best pearls to make the point….

All this doesn’t generally take very long, but, this morning, it could take a while, as I’ve already put SB through some heavy paces…. We’ll see how it’s holding up…. You may use the first quote you see as the certificate of entitlement for the remainder of the pearl….

“What about reality, you ask?  Well, as far as I’m concerned, reality can go take a flying fuck at a rolling doughnut.” — Stephen King
(This is possibly the best single pearl I have ever encountered!…)

“How often I found where I should be going only by setting out for somewhere else.” — R. Buckminster Fuller
(Okay, that’s a good one, too….)

“How pleasant then to be insane.” — F. Scott Fitzgerald
(Ooh, ooh! Me, too!….)

“Are we at last brought to such a humiliating and debasing degradation, that we cannot be trusted with arms for our own defense? Where is the difference between having our arms in our own possession and under our own direction, and having them under the management of Congress? If our defense be the _real_ object of having those arms, in whose hands can they be trusted with more propriety, or equal safety to us, as in our own hands?”
— Patrick Henry
(Whoops…. a bit of direction change there, eh?…. Let’s see where it takes us….

“Silence gives consent.” — Smart Bee, channeling the sages of all ages…
(Yep, that’s a good one, as well… nice job, SB… That’s five, let’s find two more, to finish strong….)

“Government [is] an illusion the governed should not encourage.” — John Updike, Couples
(Hmm….)

“Be assured that a walk through the ocean of most Souls would scarcely get your Feet wet.  Fall not in Love, therefore: it will stick to your face.” — National Lampoon, “Deteriorata”
(Oh no! What happened? You did that deliberately, didn’t you… Well, no way, Bubba… try again… Two, and both have to be good…)

“Don’t SAY things. What you ARE stands over you the while, and thunders so that I cannot hear what you say to the contrary.” — Ralph Waldo Emerson — Social Aims

“I have been a stranger in a strange land.” — Old Testament — Exodus ii, 22

Okay, that will do…. It’s not perfect, but, it’s relatively inoffensive while still being obscurely disturbing…  It had better do. I’m out of quotes…. Smart Bee went on strike after this last one, so, we’re done here; you can thank me later….
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Or, you can thank me now, as it is now completely done, and your suffering is at an end. So is mine, for today… Well, I do have to go read it again, to at least make a try to find the typos that are always there, so, I may as well get that done, too….

Whew! Well, I can see now, I’ll be handing out the E tickets at the beginning of today’s ride, as it takes off through the numberless corridors and infinitude of dead-end tunnels of my mind…. Come to think of it, I should probably check to make sure my insurance is paid up, and that all the safety equipment is in place, before I post…. Oh well, I can’t be responsible for those who don’t trouble to stick their own clouds of preconceived notions in their pocket before coming on board…. They’ll have to take their chances along with the rest of us….

That all being said, I think it came out pretty well, if a bit flagrantly scattered. Hmm, nice…. “Flagrantly scattered” might just be a new iconic phrase to describe this blog; don’t be surprised to see it again somewhere…. Sorry, distracted again; it’s happening a lot today…. Any who, I guess, since this is the closing section, I should bring this to a close, so, I will…. TTFN….  Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you…. Oh, and, Blessed Be…. (No, I’m not Wiccan, but, I like the thought…. it fits in with my concept of “good vibrations”….)(Plus, it will, from this day on, always be there, at the end of every post, as a tribute to, and to specifically direct it to, my friend Carole, to add to her good vibrations, in her fight against the big C….)

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….
—

Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

dozer3

It only performs when titillated…..

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Ffolkes,

In the interests of public safety, and by local statute, I am required to make the following announcement: Caution! Operator carries no caffeine! Do not put your hands in the cage. Do not speak to the operator while writing. Do not look at the operator while writing. In fact, just go away….

Okay, so the last one isn’t really in there, and, you don’t have to go away…. But, the rest is true, and good advice at this point, if a bit frantic, due to a late afternoon attack by one of Murphy’s minions yesterday, one with results much more far reaching than his usual shenanigans….. It was a real pisser, and I’m lucky I didn’t bite myself, it was so infuriating….

After a day of agonizing pain in my neck, which kept me down and out most of the day, I was dutifully, and, manfully, considering the still-present pita (pain in the neck, see? pita…. c’mon, keep up!….) cleaning up the kitchen, when I opened the coffee maker to prepare my coffee for this morning (the coffee maker is one that can be programmed to start at a set time…. heavenly!….). The machine’s getting a bit old, and Murphy decided the moment was the perfect time to have it break, in such a way as it is not repairable….. the bloody arsehole…

The plastic neck that delivers the hot water to the brew basket, to drip, cracked clean through; if used in this state, the hot water would proceed to cover the entire sink and counter where the coffee machine lives…. I’m actually lucky I noticed it break; if I hadn’t, the disaster would have been of major proportion, as it would have actually kept me from getting ANY coffee, and would no doubt have sent me into a towering rage, and subsequent riot, wherein the coffee maker would have most likely gotten tossed through the nearest window, thus requiring embarrassing explanations to the neighbors….

Though I’m pretty sure y’all don’t much give a shit about my hassles to obtain coffee, society knows better, and requires the above disclaimer if I am deprived of the necessary dose of it within a few moments of arising. It’s the law, which was enacted the last time it happened, in 1989…. you might have seen the news reports, though my lawyer tried to have them played down, and did manage to not have the law bear my name, like it does when some sex offender gets a law passed because of their actions, or named after a victim of some kind…

In my own case, there were no deaths, and only minor injuries, mostly to me, and my property…. But, it required a strong police and fire department presence to control the resultant events, and a number of officers got frightened so badly, they’re still in therapy…. The upshot is, I am required to have my first cup of very strong coffee, complete with accouterments, defined as sugar and cream, within two minutes of arising, and I am not allowed to associate with anything more complex than a toilet until that is accomplished. It’s better that way for everyone, so I don’t really have a problem with it, until stuff like this happens….

Murphy KNOWS that coffee is a legal requirement around here, and he delights in making it harder for me to stay on the right side of that legal line in the sand…. Hence, I now have to make a trip to a store today, to get a new machine, just for starters….. This morning, just to add insult to injury, it was necessary for me to heat up water on the stove, in a pan, and pour it through the coffee basket, with the machine off, in order to get any coffee at all, which, as you may guess, did NOT make me a happy camper…. I swear, if that Irish assbite ever manifests himself in front of me in such a way as to allow me to lay hands on him, he will not forget the pain for a very long time….

Now that the morning paean to coffee, and the habitual, almost required discussion complaint about Murphy’s latest version of humorous rudeness, has been composed, we can go on to other stuff…. I would say, given what I’ve seen so far, that is probably a good thing…. Quite frankly, this intro sucks big time….. but, like a wart, there it sits, so what are we to do? Well, I know what I’m gonna do….

Shall we Pearl….
_____________________________

This is the coolest thing! If you are a fan of Doctor Who, you will appreciate this, and may already know about it…. In my short stint of surfing yesterday (pain kept me off the computer a LOT yesterday….), I found the link below…. Following it will bring you to a Google map, which is of Earl Road, in London, England….

The map soon dissolves to show a picture of the street, with a blue Police telephone box in the center of the picture. If one clicks on the two white arrows that appear in the street in front of the box, the scene switches to a virtual view of the inside of the box, which happens to be the TARDIS, the Doctor’s sentient space-time travel machine….

https://maps.google.com/maps?hl=en&ll=51.492159,-0.19092&spn=0.005291,0.013937&sll=51.492140,-0.193028&layer=c&cid=12502927659667388442&panoid=c9UMhWP_MWm9U0L48xEjYw&cbp=13,291.8,,0,18.86&gl=US&t=m&cbll=51.492132,-0.192862&z=17

The scene shown inside the box is a virtual tour of the entire TARDIS interior, and the user can scroll around to view all the parts, though there is no Doctor present to guide the tour….. Regardless, it’s a great little easter egg from Google, and fun to play with for a while…. And, it serves as a way to keep me from subjecting y’all to a rant here in the first section…. Instead, I offer this little bit of fun, and hope you enjoy the time spent checking it out.

“I taught I taw a puddy tat.” — Tweety
_____________________________

It may not be clear from what has gone before, but, my head today is in a very, very strange place. I’m not sure why, or what has brought it on, but, strange it is…. It’s one of those days when I am unsure of just how I will react to any stimulus from others, so, I generally try to stay to myself on such days…. It also gives me a strange, if not altogether weird, impulse toward complex poetry, to match the feeling in my head (which, I understand, is a contradiction in terms…. feelings belong elsewhere than in the head….)…. For this, I almost always turn to this poet to furnish an appropriate verse or two….

Magi

The abstracts hover like dull angels:
Nothing so vulgar as a nose or an eye
Bossing the ethereal blanks of their face-ovals.

Their whiteness bears no relation to laundry,
Snow, chalk or suchlike. They’re
The real thing, all right: the Good, the True . . .

Salutary and pure as boiled water,
Loveless as the multiplication table.
While the child smiles into thin air.

Six months in the world, and she is able
To rock on all fours like a padded hammock.
For her, the heavy notion of Evil

Attending her cost less than a bellyache,
And Love the mother of milk, no theory.
They mistake their star, these papery godfolk.

They want the crib of some lamp-headed Plato.
Let them astound his heart with their merit.
What girl ever flourished in such company?

~~ Sylvia Plath ~~

_____________________________

Subjects suitable for a rant have presented themselves to my attention several times in the last few days….

The BRC continues its thrashing around in the throes of embarrassment, trying to repair the damage to their credibility that the clandestine spying they’ve been up to has caused in the public, as well as the exposure threatened to all the other attempts to distract us from what they are doing behind the scenes…..

The Catholic bishops are scurrying around trying to figure out “What were we thinking, when we elected this idiot as Pope?!”, while the new Pope himself is busily meeting with the people on the streets, telling them, if only by example, he is going to clean out the corrupt bishops who elected him… Well, he hasn’t actually SAID that, but, his actions thus far seem to indicate that he isn’t going to go along with the agenda they had prepared for him, and may actually be trying to bring the church into the new millennium…. Not that it makes any great difference to me, but, a LOT of people regard his words as their own guide to reality, so what he says and does can directly affect society at large….

There have been other, just as juicy articles that spelled out some new outrageous government policy, or some new outrage on the public by a police officer, or some new instance of prosecution of an elected official for stealing money from the public coffers…. Stuff like this happens every day, and, in truth, has gotten to the point where it is hard to decide which one to address….

Now, me, I’m lazy, that’s been demonstrated beyond a shadow of doubt in the past…. Therefore, even the process of decision making gets streamlined in terms of effort by my brain, which is extremely adroit at figuring out the path of least resistance (long practice helps there….). Hence, this random, harlequin, old-school pearl, with only the most meager of constraints placed on Smart Bee in regards choosing appropriate pearls… As long as fun is being poked, I’m good with it, and so should you be….

“I already know I’m paranoid.  The question is, am I paranoid enough?” — Smart Bee

“Anyway, no drug, not even alcohol, causes the fundamental ills of society. If we’re looking for the source of our troubles, we shouldn’t test people for drugs, we should test them for stupidity, ignorance, greed and love of power.” — P.J. O’Rourke

“I like a bit of a mongrel myself, whether it’s a man or a dog; they’re the best for every day.” — George Bernard Shaw  1856-1950, Misalliance [1910], episode I

“The advertisement is the most truthful part of a newspaper” — Thomas Jefferson

IDIOT, n.  A member of a large and powerful tribe whose influence in human affairs has always been dominant and controlling.  The Idiot’s activity is not confined to any special field of thought or action, but “pervades and regulates the whole.”  He has the last word in everything; his decision is unappealable.  He sets the fashions and opinion of taste, dictates the limitations of speech and circumscribes conduct with a dead-line.  — Ambrose Bierce, “The Devil’s Dictionary”

“He who despairs over an event is a coward, but he who holds hopes for the human condition is a fool.” — Albert Camus

“I realize that I’m generalizing here, but as is often the case when I  generalize, I don’t care.” — Dave Barry

Well, that came out better than I had hoped, or imagined…. well done, SB…. or, should that be, well, done, SB…. ?….. Either way, it seems…..
_____________________________

Given the handicaps under which I’ve struggled in order to complete this morning’s effort, I consider it a job well done, no matter how it came out… How did it come out? Let’s see…..

Okay, well, that’s way better than I’d hoped, or expected; I can easily attribute it to serendipity, which, in my life, is generally accompanied by a gleeful expression of joyful feeling, such as “Look what I found!”, or “Whoopee, I struck gold!”, or other such heartfelt exposition. Consider it said, and we’ll call it square, okay?….

I know it’s good, or at least, okay, because there weren’t any typos I could find…. at least, not in the first pass; however, it still has to cross Murphy’s desk, and the WP new-post editor, either of which could make their own, unapproved and unwanted, changes, usually without my knowledge…. Just remember, when it left my desk, it was pristine…. Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you….

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

dozer3

Did that demon just ovulate?….

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Ffolkes,

For over two years now, every day, I’ve arisen early to write this blog, missing only a handful of days, due to either physical issues, or technical glitches of some kind. The routine I’ve developed in that time works for me, in that I’ve so far been able to keep up the creative process, such as it is, to a level that filled up my Pearls to the brim every day, and sometimes, overfilling it until it spilled out all over the carpet, or your shoes….. Messy, but, effective…. I’m not going to be presumptuously silly, and claim to have written the world’s greatest novel, or even the world’s greatest blog, but, it has fulfilled the purpose for which I intended it, which was to maintain a certain degree of sanity in the face of changes in my life that were overwhelming me, coming as they did as a surprise, which, in itself, is no surprise….

Now, two and a half years later, I find myself in the morning, ready to write, but with the purpose for which I write becoming diluted. Much of that which I fought to overcome, has been overcome; I’m no longer in danger of living the rest of my life in pain and poverty, as it looked like for a while I would. I’m no longer completely alone, having found a partner who is good for my head, and for my heart, and for whom I can be a rock in their universe, when needed. My physical condition, while slowly deteriorating, is under control, and merely serves to challenge me to find new ways to perform old tricks, something us old dogs are good at, despite anecdotal and cultural wisdom to the contrary…..

What this means is that my motivation to write is blunted. I am not building up angst as rapidly, nor am I as concerned over the shenanigans of our beloved leaders, as I’m almost to the point where their idiocy no longer affects me directly. As long as they don’t mess with my retirement structure, they’re safe from my overt hostility, so I’ve reached the point of “don’t fuck with me and I won’t fuck with you…” with them, and we’re both content with that, for the time being. Without the angst, ranting is difficult; there are plenty and more subjects to rant about, as is evident every day in the news, but, the outrage isn’t as strong as it has been in the past, and bringing myself to the level of anger and outrage necessary to do the job correctly is getting harder as time goes on….

I can still use old-school pearls, but, I’m sure that most folks find them a bit obscure, as they do make one think more than most folks are accustomed to doing. Of course, the thinking required is easily done, if one learns how to disengage belief, and follow thoughts without the drag of that chain on our imagination, but, that is a technique not commonly held, so the effectiveness of old-school pearls is reduced thereby. The poetry, of course, never gets old, to me, and I don’t care what others think about that; it stays, no matter what…..

I’m not sure where I’m going with this lament, or discussion, or clusterfuck, whichever it may be. It’s actually all just another exercise in writing without cause or purpose, meandering through the fields of English to put together words in such a way that the Pearls can begin, with dignity, or with fanfare, or with nothing at all but your kind attention. In other words, another intro section filled with NOTHING, other than some self-styled prose, some dubious assertions, and a shit-load of nonsense, otherwise known as just plain crap. The discussion itself is one that really HAS no ending point; it’s a pretty moot point, anyway, because I will write, come what may….

But, it got us this far, which makes it legal, if not compelling literature; I’m not sure if that is even possible, at this point. I’m not going to worry about it now, though, as it is getting late (it’s already after 0700), and I do have other stuff to do today. Instead, I’ll do what I do every morning, and just drop this where it is, mucking up the landscape, but, getting us down the road….

Shall we Pearl?…..

“A wide-eyed, innocent UNICORN, poised delicately in a MEADOW filled with LILACS, LOLLIPOPS & small CHILDREN at the HUSH of twilight??” — Zippy the Pinhead

Yes…. yes, it is…..
_____________________________

On Monday, 8/12/13, Elon Musk, the young genius behind Tesla Motors and the SpaceX commercial space flight company, revealed his response to the need for high speed transportation from city to city, such as SF to LA. He developed his idea when he saw the proposed cost of the current high speed rail system under production by the state of California, of over 60 billion dollars. He felt he could come up with a design for much less cost, that would serve the same purpose, and at much higher speeds…. Once again, he has presented the world with an idea that is cheap, practical, and would work like a charm, using standard technologies we already possess…. A full description of his idea can be found at the provided link, which is his complete proposal……

http://www.spacex.com/sites/spacex/files/hyperloop_alpha-20130812.pdf

Of course, the critics are already pooh-poohing the idea, but, not very loudly, as this young man made his first million at the age of 12, and everything he has turned his attention to has thrived, despite all disbelief. He has made the first practical, and fun, electric car, and made it affordable to the average person. He has developed the technology, and the business model, to successfully offer space flight to the public, though it is still very expensive. Now, he has turned his genius to a problem that society desperately needs to be solved, and has once again come up with something that is completely workable….

So, this is not a rant, nor is it an old-school pearl… if anything, it is just a news article, passing on some rather excellent news for society, even though I know his idea will be put through the wringer of the nay-sayers, who will try to deride it as new and unworthy…. But, I don’t think there will be much of it, and it won’t last, as this is quite simply, an idea whose time has come, and will eventually be adopted as reality by society at large….

Read the article, think about it, and, a few years from now, we’ll meet in LA for lunch, and be home before the game starts a 4:05 PM….
_____________________________

I’m late, and lazy today, so Emily wins…. Given the above article, it seems appropriate somehow….

A thought went up my mind to-day

A thought went up my mind to-day
That I have had before,
But did not finish,–some way back,
I could not fix the year,

Nor where it went, nor why it came
The second time to me,
Nor definitely what it was,
Have I the art to say.

But somewhere in my soul, I know
I’ve met the thing before;
It just reminded me–‘t was all–
And came my way no more.

~~ Emily Dickinson ~~

_____________________________

Today’s format has gotten somewhat disrupted, due to the first section’s departure from normal activity…. Well, as normal as it ever gets around here…. Any who, in this space, fashion would dictate I rant, and I actually have the proper subject for same in hand. Actually, it’s a subject that isn’t going to go away, and will continue to remain in the forefront of the news for some time to come, as the solution is one the BRC is unwilling to permit.
I’m speaking of the current flap over the surveillance of the phone records and other data being compiled by the NSA and other clandestine spying agencies….. I would have said “intelligence agencies”, but, I’m not in the habit of using oxymorons, as a rule….

I COULD rant, as I have a lot of thoughts and feelings on the issue, but, yesterday, I read one of the most complete, perfectly written and researched articles on the subject that I’ve seen thus far. It is written by Jennifer Hoelzer, who was formerly the chief of staff for Oregon Congressman R. Wyden, the most outspoken critic in Congress of the spying by the administration. In responding to the President’s formation of an independent committee to examine the surveillance guidelines, in order to address “public concerns”, she outlines her part, and the parts played by all the participants, in a clear, effective manner, calling all the responsible parties to task for creating the issue in the first place.

It’s a great piece, and a must-read for anyone who wishes to have a thorough understanding of all the important major points, including an accurate timeline of the significant events….. I offer these two articles, one reporting on the President’s announcement, and the piece by Ms. Hoelzer herself. Please read them, and you’ll see what I am saying is truth….

http://news.yahoo.com/-obama-orders-panel-to-review-possible-spying-abuses–185415834.html

https://www.techdirt.com/articles/20130810/09240524136/jennifer-hoelzers-insiders-view-administrations-response-to-nsa-surveillance-leaks.shtml

As compensation, to me, for not ranting about this today, I offer these pearls, to speak to the issue in my own unique manner….

“Nationalism is an infantile sickness.  It is the measles of the human race.” — Albert Einstein

“A state which seeks to subordinate the citizen wholly to itself and merges the person into an impersonal mass, commits a collective murder.” — C. C. Martindale, _The Catholic Bedside Book_, 1953

“A Sept 13 1987 Boston Globe story indicated polls show almost half of Americans think the phrase ‘From each according to his ability, to each according to his need’ comes from the US Constitution.” — Chomsky’s Necessary Illusions

“Say what will convince, not what you believe.” — Bureaucrat’s Law #2

DIPLOMACY, n.  The patriotic art of lying for one’s country. — Ambrose Bierce, “The Devil’s Dictionary”

“Experience keeps a dear school, but fools will learn in no other, and scarcely in that; for it is true, we may give advice, but we cannot give conduct. Remember this: They that will not be counseled cannot be helped. If you do not hear reason she will rap you over the knuckles.” — Benjamin Franklin(1706-1790)– Maxims prefixed to Poor Richard’s Almanac, 1757

“As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one.” — Rom 3:10

Yes, the last one was used recently in another pearl, but, I do that sometimes, when it is a perfect fit…. If all this doesn’t convince you of how serious the situation here on Earth is becoming, well, all I can say is, either you didn’t read it all, or you have more resistance to the truth than is good for you…. Any comments are welcome, even encouraged, and will be answered ASAP, back pain permitting….
_____________________________

Well, it’s been real, even if a bit odd in structure…. Let’s take a gander…. Well, I was pleasantly surprised to find it more consistent than I thought it to be as I wrote it… I felt a bit fractured, during, but, in the end, it seems to have come out alright…. Happy daze…. Since I lucked out like that, I’m outta here, before I lose my courage…..  Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you….

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

dozer3

Democracy has become a joke in poor taste…..

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Ffolkes,

Bah, humbug! None of it makes any sense, and it certainly isn’t designed for comfort; hence, crankiness rules now apply…. No insults are too cheap, no bad names too vile for us to use, with gusto. Today, come what may, a spade will be called a spade, and outright roguery will be called to task. I don’t care a whit who the target is, or how dignified the office they hold, or how sacred they are considered by worshipful millions, if they piss me off, they’re gonna hear about it, in plain talk, without a single moment’s hesitation, and every effort will be expended to fry them unmercifully on the hot seat of my scrutiny, until their skin crackles,they start to resemble a mutilated raisin, and their screams for mercy are ringing in my ears, making beautiful music….

In order to rant effectively, the above attitude is necessary; without it, one cannot achieve the proper state of curmudgeonry, nor can one possibly reach the depth of vindictiveness that is required to poke at public figures and make it worthwhile…. In other words, one must get in direct touch with their sense of outrage, and allow it to direct, if not control, the feelings of anger, frustration, and betrayal that are so common when the BRC carries out some new, or old, method of screwing us, an event that they tend to consider as their privilege, if not their vocation….

Seriously, those who hold office in the USA, whether it is in the executive, judicial, or legislative branch of the government, think that stealing from us, lying to us, and generally bending us over and fucking us in the ass on a regular basis, are their rights as elected officials of this country, and, to be frank, I’m more than just a little tired of it…. They don’t even bother to use any K-Y Jelly, or even Vaseline…

Of course, it would help if we didn’t invite them to do so, every election…. I mean, we keep on voting the assholes into office, so we really don’t have a lot of stable ground to stand on in that respect…. Of course, we also don’t have any way to tell which ones are lying the most, but, hey, that’s on us, not on them…. We KNOW they’re going to lie, so, it becomes OUR problem when we keep letting them do it….

SIGH…. There I go again, ranting before I’ve even had any coffee, to speak of…. I drank enough to swallow my morning meds, but, then, started typing; once begun, it just ran away with me…. I guess I was dreaming about this, or something, so it was right there on the top for me to use this morning when I booted up. I hope it doesn’t mean I’ll be in crank mode all day… I’ve got stuff to do out in the BBR that will require me to speak to other people without chewing on them, which is hard to do, when all I feel like doing is slapping them silly….. I’ll have to be careful not to let it out on anyone who doesn’t deserve it (though, in general, they do….).

BIG, CHEST-HEAVING, PATHETICALLY DRAMATIC SIGH…. 😳  People are so gullible. It’s a big part of our nature, to believe what we hear, if it is presented in a certain way, from someone who, previously, has garnered our trust, generally by prior statements. Unfortunately, we never seem to learn, at least, not well enough to be consistent about it, to verify those original statements before giving the trust, or attempt to ascertain in some other way whether or not the person’s words are worthy of our trust. This goes for elected officials especially, but, as I just demonstrated, it is true for blogs, as well….

Most of the above rant is Pure Grade A 100% BS, government certified, and if anybody knows their shit, it’s the government. Oh, all the stuff about them, and their unfortunate tendency to lie, cheat, and steal, as an avocation, is true as the day is long. But the stuff about waking up cranky, being a curmudgeon, etc., that’s all BS again today…. Please note that I spoke one piece of truth, to wit: I did drink my coffee before actually typing, and therein lies the critical difference, that should have clued you in to my use of untruth as a literary device, to hook you in, and lead you logically into the ranting portion of the piece.

In short, this has been an experiment, in human psychology, and YOU are part of it! Doesn’t that just make you all tingly with excitement and joy?

Oh…. No?

Well, heck, I thought y’all would like something new and different, but, I guess it should be something that actually engages your interest, rather than tricking you into the same sort of manipulative situation that the BRC is wont to do to you (us), such as lying, and tricking you into believing things that aren’t actually real, or as dangerous and frightening as they are made out to be…… I would suppose, had I not gone so far off-script, we might have called what just happened a morality play, but…. I guess this means we should just call it a minor clusterfuck, and get on with the rest of the day….

Shall we Pearl?….

“I couldn’t remember when I had been so disappointed.   Except perhaps the time I found out that M&Ms really *do* melt in your hand …” — Peter Oakley
_____________________________

“Abstain from beans; that is, keep out of public offices, for anciently the choice of the officers of state was made by beans.” — Plutarch (46-120 AD) — Of the Training of Children

It always amazes me when I read stuff like this…. Statements like this show me that in the past one thousand, eight hundred, and ninety-three years since Plutarch reportedly died, the human race has made virtually no progress at all in learning how to govern ourselves well. By “well” I mean we have not learned, any better than they did back then, how to govern so that the people are fed, clothed, protected from their less scrupulous peers, made well when sick or injured, and generally operated with the best interests of ALL the people as primary motivation, using all resources equally and fairly, in such a way that the Earth, our only home, is also nurtured and protected, so that we will always have it….

Of course, I have to admit, to be fair, that we had not made any real progress in that when Plutarch lived, either, so, it isn’t as if we had the best examples by which we could practice our lessons to be learned in new ways. But, one would think, after all this time of watching things go wrong, we would have learned at least one or two things we could use to save our asses, now that we’re getting close to losing them…. But, it is obvious, to me, and to many, that we haven’t learned much in all these centuries, because we are still facing the same issues that were plaguing society in the days of Christ, and have continued in all the years thereafter.

I’m ranting again, and I didn’t really want to do that; this is supposed to be an old-school pearl, the first of which is the above quote from Mr. Oakley, which was intended to set the tone…. But, as is common, I couldn’t shut myself up, and had to sing another refrain in my ongoing song of lamentation regarding the state of the BRC, and the world we live in, for now…. Now, however, I’ve caught myself before getting too far into it, and will go search out the proper quotes to bring home the concept that is in my head…. Hopefully, it will be less ponderous, and less pompous, than another rant….. I’m also hoping for it to be a bit more entertaining….    😉

“Do you think sheep know when you’re pulling the wool over their eyes?” — Smart Bee

“Turning and turning the widening gyre,
the falcon cannot hear the falconer,
things fall apart, the center cannot hold,
mere anarchy is loosed upon the world.

— W.B. Yeats

“The right of the citizens to bear arms is just one more guarantee against arbitrary government, one more safeguard against a tyranny which now appears remote in America, but which historically has proved to be always possible.” — Senator Hubert Humphrey

“Those who fear death most are those who enjoy life least.” — Edward Abbey

“Reason is not measured by size or height, but by principle.” — Epictetus (c. 60 AD) — Discourses, Book i, Chap. xii

“Antiphanes said merrily, that in a certain city the cold was so intense that words were congealed as soon as spoken, but that after some time they thawed and became audible; so that the words spoken in winter were articulated next summer.” — Plutarch (46-120 AD) — Of Man’s Progress in Virtue

“Uh-oh —  WHY am I suddenly thinking of a VENERABLE religious leader frolicking on a FORT LAUDERDALE weekend?” — Zippy the Pinhead

Okay, so it came out a bit obfuscated…. it’s what happens when I give SB its head…. But, it’s still marginally better than a rant, and does get where it needs to go, so, it will do…. Did I mention you should have your seat belts fastened?….
_____________________________

Yesterday, I spent the day dealing with an age-related physical issue, to wit: agonizing pain, due to a spasming muscle in my neck. The pain, which lasted most of the day, and into the night, was, at times, excruciating, and forced me into bed for most of the day, starting at about 10 AM. It finally eased up, thanks to extreme rest, and extra medication, and is, thus far, not the same issue today…. I hate those days, as they force me to accept the passage of time in terms of what I can no longer do, or count on my body being able to do. But, it does give me a lot of time to spend in my head, a place where I refuse to be uncomfortable, or bored, or anything but happy to spend time, doing what I like doing best, just letting my mind wander through the vast spaces of the Universe as I perceive it….

Hence, Yeats….. with no apologies, and no regrets…..

A Prayer For Old Age

GOD guard me from those thoughts men think
In the mind alone;
He that sings a lasting song
Thinks in a marrow-bone;
From all that makes a wise old man
That can be praised of all;
O what am I that I should not seem
For the song’s sake a fool?
I pray — for word is out
And prayer comes round again —
That I may seem, though I die old,
A foolish, passionate man.

~~ William Butler Yeats ~~

_____________________________

So, here we are, knee deep in this muddy expanse I like to call my mind’s playground, to wit: consensual reality, and I was thinking to myself, “now what?” Having no good answer, I will once again fall back to my default position, and put together a pearl of the old-school variety, strictly for fun…. What I mean by that is, I intend to have fun putting it together, and I intend it to be fun for y’all to read….

However, we all know about good intentions, and where we can end up by having them, or, more critically, by using them, so, I’ll be careful not to let that get us into trouble…. Not in section three, it’s not allowed that late in this venue…. Bad things can happen to the space-time continuum, so, there are safeguards built in that should keep us relatively safe…. as long as we remember to wear the helmets provided…. Remember, anything that splashes on you should be immediately cleansed away, or…. well, just clean it up quickly, so we never need to see what it does….

“Death never takes the wise man by surprise, he is always ready to go.” — La Fontaine

“Holy Hand Grenades, Batman!” — Robin

“Go on, EMOTE!  I was RAISED on thought balloons!!” — Zippy the Pinhead

“If it isn’t Scottish…it’s CRRRRRAP!” — Smart MacBee

(Side joke: An American tourist was in a shop in Scotland, with one of those new wallets that uses Velcro to stay closed. When he opened it to pay for his selection, the shopkeeper exclaimed, “Och, now that’s a proper Scottish wallet! It scrreams when you open it!”) (I read that joke in Reader’s Digest, over 25 years ago….)

“No harm can come to a good man in life or death.” — Socrates

“A mind forever voyaging through strange seas of thought, alone.” — William Wordsworth

“I … reject the argument put forth by many fundamentalists that science has nothing to do with religion because God is not among the things making up the  universe in which we live.   Surely if a necessity for a god-concept in the universe ever turns up, that necessity will become evident to the scientist.” — physicist Ralph Alpher, Theology of the Big Bang, Religious Humanism,       Vol. XVII, No. 1 (Winter 1983), pg. 12

You may have noted that there is no point to this pearl; it’s all about fun, for me, anyway….. and, I’m not done having fun yet, so here, to follow up this wonderful seven-star pearl, is another, a five-star pearl gathered using the same operational motivation…. i.e., none to speak of….

“What’s another word for Thesaurus?” — Steven Wright

“Beware of the young doctor and the old barber.” — Benjamin Franklin

“We should consider every day lost on which we have not danced at least once. And we should call every truth false which was not accompanied by at least one laugh.” — Nietzsche, Friedrich Wilhelm (1844-1900)
(I use this one a lot…. It’s a big part of what I consider my basic attitude toward life at large….)

“We can do noble acts without ruling earth and sea.” — Aristotle

“If called by a panther…don’t anther.” — Ogden Nash (1902-1971), “Parents Keep Out!”

I rest my case…. and a good thing, too! This may be a new record, for the number of pearls, in the most pearls, in any one Pearl, ever…. If you followed that, you’ve been reading this blog for a long time, and good for you…. For the rest of y’all, just note, please, I’ve once again completely lost my mind prior to the end of this missive….
_____________________________

Well, that was fun! For me, anyway…. Let’s take a peek at what others will see…. Wow! Now, THAT is an epic Pearl, and just chock full of virtual wisdom and humor, or an irrational facsimile thereof….. I can feel myself getting more and more out of control in my head; if I don’t stop typing soon, two things will happen….

First, my back will turn into a mass of muscles in spasm, intent on achieving the same relative hardness as a two-by-four piece of ironwood, and I’ll turn into a whiny, pathetic mess; and, second, I will probably end up saying, or writing something that will get me arrested, or, flamed in vile, misspelled language by some fundie, or other silly shit-for-brains, instead of hearing applause, or intelligently critical, but polite, comments from my esteemed Gentle Readers…. and I’m blathering now, so I’ll stop….

It will do, and it’s certainly enough for one day…. Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you…. Blessed Be…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

dozer3

Picking random numbers in a somber mood….

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Ffolkes,

It’s been a good while since the sight of a blank screen in the morning scared me overmuch; I’ve learned to deal with that particular fear rather well, I think. This morning, though, I can’t help but feel a bit of trepidation…. it’s so blank, and so white! Just the color (or lack of it….) is enough to start the trembling and gibbering that usually accompanies my fears of this nature…. It’s not that I’m a coward; the hundreds of fights I’ve had to jump into, in order to stop a battle, or to control someone in a rage,  gave me more than enough proof that I’m not afraid of physical harm…. No, it’s the threat of a blank mind that gives me the heebie-jeebies….

But, in the last few weeks, I’ve found the solution, for the most part….. It’s not always pretty, but, it’s always a legal document, at least, it’s legal once I’ve let my head wander, dragging along my fingers, prancing them around the keyboard like little martinets. I always manage to find four or five paragraphs of relatively useless information have been deposited on screen, fulfilling my needs for an intro, at least from a legal point of view….. Artistically speaking, it’s a whole different ball of wax, but, nobody’s giving me any prizes or salary anyway, so it matters little in the long run. It gets me into the first section, where I can allow my creative side, whether it wants to rant, or go old-school, have its head…..

Still, there’s a small part of me that regrets my inability to find a template, or something consistent that could be used in this section to get us where we need to go….. It would make life easier, to be sure, but, since it doesn’t seem like it will ever happen, I don’t think I’m going to hold my breath until it does…. So, y’all will have to continue to suffer through these little personal conversations with myself, occasionally laughing, occasionally groaning, and often ducking in alarm, as some pretty dangerous concepts get thrown around at times, without any warning to speak of….

Then there are those mornings when, Murphy notwithstanding, things go badly, and I have to resort to one of my emergency procedures to get us out of the intro… Those days can be pretty tough to handle, especially if I am forced to resort to any of the procedures numbered 3 or 7….. those are both somewhat disruptive to the space-time continuum, and it can take a while for normality to resume its customary shapes…. Of course, I offer extra doses of Valium on those days, so it all balances out, mostly….

Why, look! It’s happened again….. Here we are, four and more paragraphs in, and not a single coherent word to be seen…. Oh, I know, it all SEEMS to be lucid, and reasonable, but, you’re not the one in my head, and can’t see what is really going on in there, so, be happy that is the case…. Even the strong have been known to faint in horror when confronted with that stuff too early in the day…. Regardless of all that, we’ve reached the legal line again, so we are now cleared to take off…. Y’all had best return to your seats, buckle up, and take your medication, because the ride is about to begin….

Shall we Pearl?….
_____________________________

This is going to be a strange little pearl…. I started out trying to pick quotes that would create an image of our society, showing not its strengths, but its weaknesses, with the intention of making fun of how silly it all is…. Well, I got a picture like that, but, silly isn’t the word I’d use to describe the image…. “Sad”, or “pathetic”, would be more accurate, I think…. It doesn’t even hit all of the high spots, in terms of all the stuff that is wrong with our culture, but, it does give a good idea of how fractured and disorganized it has become over time, until today, when nobody alive can make heads or tails out of it….. So, being strange, and sad, it thus gives a pretty good picture…. or, at least an accurate one….

“A hundred years ago we were much smarter; then you lived until you died and  not until you were just run over.” — Will Rogers

“In the beginning was nonsense, and the nonsense was with God, and the nonsense was God.” –Friedrich Nietzsche

“Forward goes the vanguard of the lunatic fringe, tickling the death clowns of normality.” — HealNorm

“I’d like to see people, instead of spending so much time on the ethical problem, get after the problems that really affect the people of this country.” — Richard Nixon

“Whenever we read the obscene stories, the voluptuous debaucheries, the cruel and torturous executions, the unrelenting vindictiveness, with which more than half the bible is filled, it would seem more consistent that we called it the word of a demon than the Word of God. It is a history of wickedness that has served to corrupt and brutalize mankind.” — Thomas Paine — The Age of Reason

“When they call the roll in the Senate, the Senators do not know whether to answer ‘Present’ or ‘Not guilty.'” — Theodore Roosevelt

“Fortune is like glass,–the brighter the glitter, the more easily broken.” — Publius Syrus (42 BC) — Maxim 280

I feel as if this is not quite clear, so, I will add one more little powerful quote, to put it all into the proper perspective…..

“It’s so clean. It’s certainly uncontaminated by cheese.” — Smart Bee
_____________________________

So far today, all I seem to be able to produce is crap, or a reasonable facsimile thereof…. To avoid splashing any of that onto any other artists, especially those who have my respect and admiration, I’ll put in one of my own poems today, and hope for the best…. Enjoy!….

How It Works….

Retreat, retreat, he cries in vain
we cannot stand such pain!
Another battle, another day’s fight
Eternally at war, both day and night.

Storms within, crashing and thrashing about,
filling each moment with fear and doubt.
Cries of anguish, hopes for a swift end
Denied with wounds that will not mend.

The crisis approaches, time will not wait.
It marches on, driven madly by fate.
We have no recourse, no other road to walk,
No great power to whom we may talk.

Morning arrives, seemingly mild and free
Until one considers all that must be
An intro, some pearls, a photo or two
Today’s magnificent Pearl, created just for you…..

 ~~gigoid ~~

_____________________________

I should probably rant here, and actually have a good subject on which to go off…. However, my mood is such that I don’t have the patience to sit and be logical right now…. Not to mention the stiffness in my hips and back that is making it hard to sit for long…. Already this morning, I’ve been compelled to take a number of breaks, to stop my legs from going numb, or to prevent stiffness from building up…. Any who, all my physical handicaps aside, I just don’t feel like ranting, as I’d probably not just go off, but would most likely go over the top…. which is something y’all should strongly hope you never have to witness….

So, I’ll fall back on an old-school pearl to save the day…. In deference to my own lack of purpose this morning, I’ll let Smart Bee pick the subjects, and see what is in its little mind to highlight for discussion…. On the greater majority of times I let it have its own way, it seems to do very well, so…. off we go… Where we will end up has yet to be determined…. I hope it’s funny, though, I’m in the mood for funny….

“Being entirely honest with oneself is a good exercise.” — Sigmund Freud

“And on the 8th day Man, unable to cope, discovered drugs.” — Smart Bee

A traveler at Sparta, standing long upon one leg, said to a Lacedaemonian, “I do not believe you can do as much.” “True,” said he, “but every goose can.” — Plutarch (46-120 AD) — Remarkable Speeches

But it’s all right now.
I’ve learned my lesson well.
You see, you can’t please everyone,
So you gotta please yourself!

— Ricky Nelson

“The great question that has never been answered and which I have not yet been able to answer despite my thirty years of research into the feminine soul is: WHAT DOES A WOMAN WANT?” — Sigmund Freud (1856-1939)

“Never underestimate the power of soup.”– Smart Bee

“I do not believe in the collective wisdom of individual ignorance.” — Thomas Carlyle

Well, I was right about one part…. it is strange, for certain…. I like it, though…. Kind of like the runt of the litter, y’know, it’s always the cutest….
_____________________________

Okay, that does it…. I’m done for the day, and nothing you could say or do could conceivably make me do it over…. Even before I go to proof it, I know it will be one of the oddest Pearls I’ve ever created, so, I’m a bit leery…. Oh, well, it ain’t getting done while I sit here moaning about it…..

I’m totally unsure of just how this got done, but, it’s done, and didn’t come out all that badly…. It won’t win any prizes, I’m pretty sure, but, it won’t hurt anyone in particular, unless they identify too strongly with one part or another, so, that removes it from the realm of being a public nuisance…. which, on a day like today, is the best I can hope for…. Tomorrow will be better, or different, whichever comes first….  Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you….

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

dozer3

Now renting parodies of human existence….

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Ffolkes,

Oh. My. Gosh…. (Hmm… just doesn’t have the same punch as the blasphemous version, does it?…. Oh, well, I like to be polite, and blasphemy so early in the morning is rude, even for me….) Any who, color me both surprised and dismayed…. Yesterday, or rather, night before last, I slept so hard, I hurt  myself! All day yesterday, my left shoulder was killing me, no matter how much I tried to get ahead of the pain with an extra dose of meds. You can only go so far in that direction before being compelled to turn back, due to side effects, or overdosing concerns. No, I realized, around noon, the pain was because I slept so long on my left side, the shoulder was suffering from being held in one position for too long, and not being at all adult about suffering the pain in silence…..

In spite of the agonizing and contortions this caused during the day yesterday, you can see that it was such an unnerving episode that it’s still bothering me today…. It’s either that, or I’m being a weenie, and I don’t want to hear anything at all from the peanut gallery about that statement….. It was unnerving due to the ironic nature of the pain; if I hadn’t slept so well, I wouldn’t have been in pain…. I could easily attribute that kind of thing to Murphy, but, it’s a bit subtle for him; his sense of humor runs more to pie-in-the-face, or keystone kops, than it does to irony or subtlety…..

Hmm, I hate to say it, but, that only leaves the weenie option, which is just wrong, and doesn’t deserve the screen-time I’m giving the whole issue…. But, then, isn’t that what the intro section is for? Long-winded, barely sane, ironic, or sardonic, statements about issues that have no meaning outside my bathroom walls, for the most part, meandering for what often seems like forever through strange landscapes and even weirder concepts, all to get to some obscure, semi-intellectual question about matters that are unresolvable in light of modern technology, or modern culture, combined with some rather odd habits and beliefs about human nature….. But, think of this…. where would you be if you weren’t here?

Aha! See, you can’t answer that, not without stopping to read, and think about it…. And, the answer you’d find wouldn’t make you anywhere nearly as happy and amused as you are here, so, see? It’s not a waste of time, for you, or for me….. This concludes our exercise in the dangers of using logic before 6 PM….. I hope you have enjoyed learning about the most pressing problem faced by our society today; please feel free to take the handouts with you when you leave, and don’t forget to stop in the gift shop…. the starving children will thank you for all you purchases, 25% of which will go to their care and feeding….

How did we get there? And who was that guy? Just what is going on here? Sheesh, step away to get a cup of coffee, and two whole paragraphs appear on the screen! Ignore the last two, ffolkes, that was Murphy, doing his thing….. Though I do implore y’all to forget these excessively weird paragraphs even exist, I AM going to take them as part of the legal requirements for this section, and bring this to a close…. Alright, I can hear those of you not snickering breathing huge sighs of relief out there, so, I’ll take the hint, and get on with the business for today….

Shall we Pearl?…..
_____________________________

“HEY CONGRESS! What ever happened to the Constitution?” — Smart Bee

You would, as would anyone in this position, assume this to be the beginning of another rant against politics, and those wonderful examples of broken morality, our beloved ruling class. But, nope, it’s not…. Oh, it could be, if I wished it. In fact, that is what I started to do, when I first put it up there for your perusal….. But, to be honest, I’m just not in the mood for ranting today. Not that I don’t feel the outrage at their daily shenanigans…. My opinion of Obama took another nosedive day before yesterday, when he canceled his trip to speak with the leader of what’s left of the USSR, Alex Putin, because the Russians refused to extradite Eric Snowden, the former tech worker turned whistleblower….

I think that what Mr. Snowden did deserves the thanks and support of all the American people, for bringing to light still more of the clandestine activities being perpetrated by those in power. The reaction of the Obama administration has gone a long way toward destroying his image of a President who is concerned for the common man, as he continues to completely ignore the illegality of the entire issue (of the prisons, of the torture, of the internal spying, of the court with no oversight…) and refuses to even address his own part in all of it….. It’s infuriating to see a man of such patriotism and bravery (Snowden) being persecuted by his own government, though it shouldn’t come as a surprise….

Hmm….. It seems that if I allowed myself to do so, I could  put out a pretty vitriolic rant; I guess my mood is more flexible than I had assumed for so early…. But, I still don’t feel like going all the way off, because, well, getting all emotionally worked up is not a good way to start the day, at least, not today…. Any who, to avoid any further complications due to angst or emotional outbursts, I’ll let Smart Bee put together a pearl, using the political scene of today’s society as a starting point for search parameters….. Or, as they are fond of saying downtown…. whatever, dude….

“Do thou restrain the haughty spirit in thy breast, for better far is gentle courtesy.” — Homer

“I’m just here for moral support. Ignore the gun.” — Smart Bee, channeling a Senator

“I see it as a compensation. I feel like I’m doing a good job. If no one is recognizing my good job, I recognize it.” — Orlando Arias, Los Angeles county health inspector, — after being filmed accepting a $200 bribe, — as reported by AP, November 10, 1998

“Let a fool hold his tongue and he will pass for a sage.” — Publius Syrus (42 BC) — Maxim 914

“The Three Stooges, the sinking ship, and the lone lifeboat: Ronald Reagan: “Maybe we should save the women and children.”
Richard Nixon: “F**k the women and children!”
Bob Packwood: “Gee, do you really think we have time?”

— the Stilt Man

I think “immoral” is probably the wrong word to use…I prefer the word “unethical.” — Ivan Boesky, inside stock trader

“All military type firearms are to be handed in immediately… The SS, SA and Stahlhelm give every respectable German man the opportunity of campaigning with them.   Therefore anyone who does not belong to one of the above named organizations and who unjustifiably nevertheless keeps his weapon… must be regarded as an enemy of the national government.” — SA Oberfuhrer of Bad Tolz, March, 1933

I’m going to stop there, because it’s beginning to get a bit obscure, and I don’t want to anyone to lose the message…. which, simply put, is this…. Despite all they will tell you, the elected officials in this country, from the top, all the way to the bottom, are NOT doing their jobs with YOUR best interests in mind, nor are they overly concerned with following the precepts of governing as set down in the Constitution by our forefathers. They are doing the best they can do to fill their own pockets, and the pockets of their friends, and anything other than that they tell you is a bare-faced lie…. Sorry to be the one to tell you, but, somebody has to….

Of course, the last guy who did so is now hiding out, being protected by the Russian (!!!???) government, not out of humanitarian impulses, but for political gamesmanship…. These days, it’s not a good idea to be publishing the secrets of the politicians… They get so annoyed, and swarm around, looking just like a hive of beetles under a rock, exposed to the light of day…..

Unfortunately, they’re more dangerous than beetles, because they have guns, and, sadly, the force of the laws they’ve written to protect their rights to plunder, and to allow them to lie to us….. Watch your step, ffolkes, or you may be their next target for exploitation (not that you aren’t already being screwed over…. but, it could become specific and personal, rather than just as a part of the general fucking of society that is taking place…..)

I’ll leave you with two final thoughts on the subject, just because I can….

“I don’t pick on politicians. They ain’t done nothin’.” — Red Skelton

“Truly, you are a person who speaks the truth, lives the truth, abides by  the truth. And truth is, of course, stranger than fiction, and you certainly are too.” — Smart Bee
_____________________________

Strangely enough, I’m still in the mood for Emily, so, you’ll have to put up with her insane genius for another day….

I cannot live with you,
It would be life,
And life is over there
Behind the shelf

The sexton keeps the key to,
Putting up
Our life, his porcelain,
Like a cup

Discarded of the housewife,
Quaint or broken;
A newer Sevres pleases,
Old ones crack.

I could not die with you,
For one must wait
To shut the other’s gaze down,–
You could not.

And I, could I stand by
And see you freeze,
Without my right of frost,
Death’s privilege?

Nor could I rise with you,
Because your face
Would put out Jesus’.
That new grace

Glow plain and foreign
On my homesick eye,
Except that you, than he
Shone closer by.

They’d judge us–how?
For you served Heaven, you know
Or sought to;
I could not,

Because you saturated sight,
And I had no more eyes
For sordid excellence
As Paradise.

And were you lost, I would be,
Though my name
Rang loudest
On the heavenly fame.

And were you saved,
And I condemned to be
Where you were not,
That self were hell to me.

So we must keep apart,
You there, I here,
With just the door ajar
That oceans are,
And prayer,
And that pale sustenance,
Despair!
 
~~ Emily Dickinson ~~

_____________________________

This section’s pearl is a tribute to perseverance; I’m tired, and just want to be done for the day, but, I must live up to my own standards, because nobody else will… any who, no worries, we’ll just do a random harlequin old-school style pearl, and all will be well…. provided SB doesn’t give me a hard time…..

“For the wise men of old, the cardinal problem had been how to conform the soul to reality. And the solution has been knowledge, self-discipline, and virtue. But for the contemporary mindset the problem is how to subdue reality to the wishes of man.” — C.S. Lewis  “The Abolition of Man”

“He is the MELBA-BEING…  the ANGEL CAKE… XEROX him…  XEROX him –” — Zippy the Pinhead

“A State which is incompetent to satisfy different races condemns itself; a State which does not include them is destitute of the chief basis of self- government.  The theory of nationality, therefore, is a retrograde step in history.” — Lord Acton (1834-1902)

“If you don’t run your own life, somebody else will.” — John Atkinson

“Never create by law what can be accomplished by morality.” — Charles-Louis Secondat Baron de Montesquieu

“It is so basic. A human being is an innocent part of nature. Our civilization has distorted this universal quality that allows us to feel at home in our skin. Other animals have coats that they accept, but the human race has yet to come to terms with being nude.” — Ruth Bernhard

“If you work on your mind with your mind, how can you avoid an immense confusion?” — Seng-Ts’an

See? All in the wrist….
_____________________________

Producing these Pearls has, of late, been an epic undertaking…. but, since there isn’t anything else that is pulling at me to get done, I can only be grateful for having something that keeps me out of trouble, for the most part….. I’m not going to comment on what that may be costing me in terms of self-respect, but, whatever it is, my ego can take it…. and, no, I have no idea what any of that means, particularly…. Let’s see what kind of damage I’ve done so far…..

Okay, then…. That there is some serious business…. I didn’t realize I had come down so copiously on the BRC today, but, that’s okay by me, they deserve all the crap we can throw at them, just to keep things balanced…. Plus, it’s done, so, hey, I’m outta here…..  Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you….

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

dozer3

Soused on pilfered gin, all in a good cause…..

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Ffolkes,

As much as I love it when a plan comes together, I hate even more when it doesn’t….. such as this morning. I can tolerate Murphy’s usual screwing around with those parts of life that will fuck me over the most; I even tolerate it when the asshole just won’t let up, and hits me over and over throughout the day…. But, this I won’t tolerate…. He’s trying to fuck with my computer, and that is unacceptable…. I don’t need that kind of aggravation, not any more, and I won’t put up with it for long at all….. If he continues in this vein, there WILL BE A RECKONING!!!

Sorry for the outburst, but, computer issues due to just plain orneriness is something I just won’t allow. If this were an old machine, or had a history, or was getting overloaded with too much crap software, or something explainable, I could accept a bit of mucking about on boot up….. But, the kind of stuff Murphy had it doing today just won’t cut it, not when I know there is no reason beyond Murphy’s own assholiness to hold as responsible….. Sorry, but, I’ll not have it, and if he doesn’t like it, well, he can come talk to me, and I’ll explain it, in words of no more than one syllable…. or, if that isn’t working, I can just show him with my hands….. he’ll get the picture quite quickly, in that case….

I know, I talk a big game, but, how am I going to get him to hold still? Those iconic forces of nature can be tricky to pin down, possessing those supernatural powers over the rules of space and time as they do….. But, I don’t care how big and bad he is, he fucks with my comp again, and he’s dead meat…..

There, I feel better, if only for venting. I suppose that’s why I rant…. to get all that powerful negativity out of my head, and out into the real world, where it can be better dealt with in a way that won’t harm me, or anyone else. It’s a harmless enough pastime, especially when one considers how few people actually see it in one day; nobody is going to get hurt if they don’t read it, and hopefully, even if they do read it, it won’t cause any bleeding…. I know that I hate to bleed anywhere near the computer, so I’m sure other ffolkes don’t much like it, either…. Not bleeding is a good thing, in most everyone’s world, so we’ll try to keep things such that it can be avoided….

I can’t say that I am terribly proud of this particular opening section; so far it’s even more lame than usual, even for this blog. But, we’ve already reached the point where we are over the limit for allowable deletion, so I’ll have to let it go out the way it is, sans any elegance or witty repartee. Rats! I did so hope to include some witty repartee today…. it’s been so long since I tried my hand at it….. Ah, well, I’ll just have to settle for whatever SB comes up with as pearls today, because, I’m late, I’m late, for a very important date….. not really, but, it’s time to go dive in….

Shall we Pearl?…..
_____________________________

I’m in a curious mood, one that feels as if I should not trifle with it, lest it become something more suitable for a horror movie, with great gobs of blood, gore, and destruction….. None of us wants that on a Friday; it could affect the entire weekend. So, I’m giving Smart Bee its head, to see what it can come up with that will possibly turn this in a new direction, before it gets dangerous to navigate…. let’s see what it can do….

“Knowledge is a polite word for dead but unburied imagination….think twice before thinking.” — e.e. cummings

In the days when Sussman was a novice Minsky once came to him as he sat hacking at the PDP-6.  “What are you doing?”, asked Minsky. “I am training a randomly wired neural net to play Tic-Tac-Toe.” “Why is the net wired randomly?”, asked Minsky. “I do not want it to have any preconceptions of how to play” Minsky shut his eyes. “Why do you close your eyes?”, Sussman asked his teacher. “So that the room will be empty.” At that moment, Sussman was enlightened.” — AI koan

“Enter freely and leave some of the happiness you bring behind.” — The Insidious Wu Han

“It is a great advantage for a system of philosophy to be substantially true.” — George Santayana

“People who wear mirrored sun glasses should seek professional help.” — Smart Bee

“Oh Lord, grant that we may not despise our rulers; and grant, oh Lord, that they may not act so we can’t help it.” — Lyman Beecher

“Fallacies do not cease to be fallacies because they become fashions.” — G. K. Chesterton, ILN, 4/19/30

Ooh, ooh, that’s a good one…. I can’t say for certain what direction it brought us to, but, it will, I have no doubt, be better than where we were headed…. Well, one always hopes…..
_____________________________

On days such as this, where I’m living under a set of rules that may or may not be clear, I tend to look for the same kind of obscurity, or at least, semi-transparency, in the poetry that will fit in with the mood of the day. Most often, in such cases, Emily is perfect, and today is such a case…. Don’t ask me to explain this one, because I won’t…. because I can’t…. I like it anyway…..

A bird came down the walk:
He did not know I saw;
He bit an angle-worm in halves
And ate the fellow, raw.

And then he drank a dew
From a convenient grass,
And then hopped sidewise to the wall
To let a beetle pass.

He glanced with rapid eyes
That hurried all abroad,–
They looked like frightened beads, I thought;
He stirred his velvet head

Like one in danger; cautious,
I offered him a crumb,
And he unrolled his feathers
And rowed him softer home

Than oars divide the ocean,
Too silver for a seam,
Or butterflies, off banks of noon,
Leap, splashless, as they swim.

~~ Emily Dickinson ~~

_____________________________

It isn’t your fault, but, I was up quite late this morning; turning over to try to go back to sleep actually kept working each time I did it, starting at 0400, all the way up to 0705, when I finally arose…. I reiterate, it isn’t your fault, but you’re going to get the perk that goes along with that, which is the simple fact that I don’t have the time to put together a rant…. This means, of course, that we’ll be going old-school for this section again today, and you will just have to learn to appreciate it…. Just think about the rant you’re NOT having to read….

Now that we have successfully promulgated, and denied, the normal course of events in such cases, I am free to go on to the gathering of the pearls, always the most fun part of this process….. Well, it’s fun, as long as Smart Bee is cooperating, and it has been doing well today so far…. let’s hope it continues…. Before I bore y’all completely senseless, which would mean calling the crew in to perform the sleeping body disposals, I’m going to go diving….. see ya on the flip side, as they say….. Well, I guess they don’t say that any more, so…. hell with it, I’ll be back….

“Most of us lead lives of chaotic improvisation from day to day, bawling for peace while plunging grimly into fresh disorders.” — Edward Abbey

“Integrity has no need for rules.” — Albert Camus

“The whole principle is wrong; it’s like demanding that grown men live on skim milk because the baby can’t eat steak.” — author Robert A. Heinlein on censorship

“If you wants to get elected president, you’ve got to think up some memorable homily so’s school kids can be pestered into memorizin’ it, even if they don’t know what it means.” — Walt Kelly, The Pogo Party

“Chi Wen Tzu always thought three times before taking action. Twice would have been quite enough.” — Confucius, 5th century BC

“The world will never starve for want of wonders; but only for want of wonder.” — G. K. Chesterton, TREMENDOUS TRIFLES

“Hello.  Just walk along and try NOT to think about your INTESTINES being almost FORTY YARDS LONG!!” — Zippy the Pinhead

What a perfectly random group! The point it takes us to is the absolute perfect representation of whatever it was we did here today, don’t you think? Of course, whatever that may be is beyond the capability of the English language to accurately describe, but, there is nothing new in that, either, not for this blog…. I like to think we push the boundaries back a little bit every day…. Oh, look, it’s quitting time!….  See ya….
_____________________________

As noted above, I got a late start today, but, managed to rush it all through without any bloodshed…. Let’s see if it’s at all palatable…. Well, it’s savory enough, even if potentially unpalatable for those who can’t, or won’t, use more than three neurons at once; that’s okay, it’s not designed for their consumption, anyway. Regardless of any of that, it will do, and, hallelujah, it’s done…. On time, too…. I’m going to count my blessings, and be on my way…. TTFN, amigos….  Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you….

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

dozer3

We’ll have an asparagus pizza, and the Neopolitan pudding….

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3

Ffolkes,

I just want to be on record as saying that I believe, contrary to consensus opinion, Brussels sprouts are not little green balls of Evil. There are occasions, I will admit, when they’ve been used to foster Evil’s ends; infrequently, but, always fearfully, they are forced upon unwilling, terrified children as a form of hideous torture, in plain view at family meals, but, in my view, they are not inherently bad, merely easily manipulated…. That being said, we can get on with the day’s business, even though the ambiance regulator has already been set on weird…. S’okay, anything to do with Brussels sprouts can be considered weird, so, we’re good to go, conceptually….

And, then, I woke up…. dazed and confused doesn’t begin to describe the state of my no-mind…. which I don’t mean in a Zen sense, no sirree bob…. It does, however, mean I’m awake, after a fashion…. That is, if that word can legally be used to describe what I am just now…. I’m not sure of anything other than the fact that, since I’m writing this the night before, it is only an approximation, based on prior experiences, and may, or may not, be completely congruent with reality as it exists then…. or, now…. or, whenever it may, or may not be….. Now, I’m not sure what day it is anymore, and I think I’ll go back to bed…. try to start over….

The above paragraphs seem to have been left for me this morning, though I don’t recall having written them…. It must be a touch of early onset Alzheimer’s, or something….

No, actually, I’ll be honest…. I did  write them last night, and all in all, I think they’re not bad, if a bit odd. I was going to try to pass them off as forgotten, or as fresh, but, my honesty bone wouldn’t allow it, so I’m admitting them to be a plant….. No harm, no foul, right? If nothing else, it got me this far down the line into the intro, and not having to struggle for that is a bonus, for sure…. I’ve given up on finding the right template for this section, and now just let it flow as it occurs….

It has worked out fairly well that way, though it still causes me some worry, when I stare at the screen each morning, praying hypocritically for inspiration…. I’m flexible, and if there is a God, and He wants to help out, fine…. I don’t think so, but, I’ve been known to be wrong a couple of times in the past, and it can happen to anyone, so I like to leave some room for changing my mind, if necessary….

Like any real  writer, I’d sell my mother’s soul for a good line or two…. I’d feel guilty for a few minutes, but, I’d do it, especially if promised a complete poem…. Since, by my way of thinking, there isn’t a God, and, thus, no Devil, either, I’m pretty sure I’m safe in that respect…. Knowing this doesn’t stop the worry, but, it does keep me sane…. well, I think so, but, who am I to contradict the professionals?….

Shall we Pearl?…
_____________________________

The article to which the link below points, was written by a man with my dream job, had I any remaining interest at all in working for a living…. His name is Mark Morford, and he is a columnist for the SF Chronicle, writing a very long column once or twice a week, each of which shows an incredible command of the English written word, as well as, possibly, the largest vocabulary I have ever seen in actual use…

He doesn’t just use the language, he USES it, with great style, power, and facility, fueled by a sharply observant mind, and a cynical, doubting eye… Is it any wonder I like his stuff?…. Any who, he wrote a piece that I want to share with y’all, about a subject I rant on frequently, i.e., the lies we are told every day, by people at all levels of society, who don’t care to observe any sort of honesty in their lifestyles, to wit: practically everyone in positions of authority, for that matter, in any position at all…. I think you’ll enjoy it, and it will save me the time, which I can use to find more pearls for your delectation….

http://blog.sfgate.com/morford/2013/08/06/100-percent-all-natural-lies/

I couldn’t have said it better myself, and have done so in the past (you figure out the context in that sentence, if you wish, I couldn’t….), no humor intended, though it’s probably hilarious, taken correctly….. Any who, I thought it was a very clear, very convincing argument regarding the constant barrage of lies we receive every day from those who choose the news….

The corporations set the agendas, the beloved ruling class keeps the populace distracted, the judges protect them, the police bully the populace into following the corporate rules, and the preachers preach obedience to temporal authority, and pocket their kickbacks…. It’s been this way since the first cavemen got together to barter, way back before Jesus kicked the sticks out of his crib, and, still today, not enough ffolkes are aware of it all to make a difference in the outcome…..

SIGH…. It makes me wonder how humans can consider themselves as the most intelligent animal on this planet, because they sure don’t display much of it…. Since Mr. Morford was so illuminating with his article, I’ll merely try to get you to smile in acknowledgment, while promoting the same message with my pearls….

“Well, there were sixty-eight people there, and sixty-two of them had no more desire to throw a stone than you had, Satan!”
“Oh, it’s true.   I know your race.  It is made up of sheep.  It is governed by minorities, seldom or never by majorities.  It suppresses its feelings and its beliefs and follows the handful that makes the most noise.  Sometimes the noisy handful is right, sometimes wrong; but no matter, the crowd follows it. The vast majority of the race, whether savage or civilized, are secretly kind- hearted and shrink from inflicting pain, but in the presence of the aggressive and pitiless minority they don’t dare to assert themselves.  Think of it!  One kind-hearted creature spies upon another, and sees to it that he loyally helps in iniquities which revolt both of them.  Speaking as an expert, I know that ninety-nine out of a hundred of your race were strongly against the killing of witches when that foolishness was first agitated by a handful of pious lunatics in the long ago.  And I know that even to-day, after ages of transmitted prejudice and silly teaching, only one person in twenty puts any real heart into the harrying of a witch.  And yet apparently everybody hates witches and wants them killed.  Some day a handful will rise up on the other side and make the most noise — perhaps even a single daring man with a big voice and a determined front will do it — and in a week all the sheep will wheel and follow him, and witch-hunting will come to a sudden end.” — Mark Twain, The Mysterious Stranger

“The news is the one thing the networks can point to with pride. Everything else they do is crap – and they know it.” — Fred Friendly, 1980

“State legislators are merely politicians whose darkest secret prohibits them from running for higher office.” — Dennis Miller

“The trouble with Congress is every time they make a law, it’s a joke, and every time they make a joke, it’s a law!” — Will Rogers

“When politicians rush to fix things, it’s a sure sign that either the intended patient is dead or fully healed.” — Tony Snow (News Commentator, 2002)

“The problem of civil society is twofold: how to identify and select wise rulers, and how to assure that their wisdom will be used for the benefit of the ruled- or of the common good as distinct from their private good.” — Harry V. Jaffa

“To see what’s in front of one’s nose requires a constant struggle.” — George Orwell
_____________________________

I love poetry, as is probably apparent by my daily inclusion of one or more of them in these Pearls…. One of the reasons is that the power of words seems to increase when used well in a poem; the meaning of each seems to be larger, and amenable to greater flexibility of that meaning, allowing the poet to address more than one issue with the same words…. The following poem from one of my favorite poets is a perfect example of this, as so elegantly demonstrated in the final line…. Looked at with a certain viewpoint, this poem is a perfect complement to the rants above, in section one, both mine, and the one from Mr. Morford, as well…. Enjoy!…..

Epigram Engraved on the Collar of a Dog Which I Gave to His Royal Highness

I am his Highness’ dog at Kew;
Pray tell me, sir, whose dog are you?

~~ Alexander Pope ~~

_____________________________

I’m tired already, but not in either a physical or mental sense…. I’m just old, and feeling it. Regardless of the ‘why’, I need to get this last section filled in with something appropriate, so, I’m going to show exactly how lazy I’m able to be, and go with another old school pearl…. I have no excuse, nor do I feel I need one, as this pearl’s entire purpose is entertainment, not elucidation, or education, or even edification…. I know it can be a difficult task, but try to enjoy this, okay? It’s all in fun….

Axiom #2:  “Ability to type on a computer terminal is no guarantee of sanity, intelligence, or common sense.”
Corollary #3: “An infinite number of monkeys at an infinite number of keyboards  could produce something like Usenet.”
Corollary #4: “They could do a better job of it.”

— Gene Spafford, USENET Axiom #2
(Now you know more about the process of creating these Pearls than I ever intended anyone to know….)

“Real suffering has a face and a smell. It lasts in its most intense form no matter what you drape over it. And it knows your name.” — Mary Karr’s The Liar’s Club
(Scary thought, eh? All too true, though, in almost everyone’s life….)
(I thought we were being funny? Oh, right, we are…. sorry, got distracted….)
(Okay, I’ll stop commenting now….)

“Natives who beat drums to drive off evil spirits are objects of scorn to smart Americans who blow horns to break up traffic jams.” — Mary Ellen Kelly

“When choosing between two evils I always like to take the one I’ve never tried before.” — Mae West, in “Klondike Annie” 1936

“At 50 everyone has the face he deserves.” — George Orwell (1903-1950), “Journals”, 1949

“Never meddle in the affairs of dragons, for, to them, you are crunchy, and tasty with ketchup.” — Anonymous

“The evidence of the emotions, save in cases where it has strong objective support, is really no evidence at all, for every recognizable emotion has its opposite, and if one points one way then another points the other way. Thus the familiar argument that there is an instinctive desire for immortality, and that this desire proves it to be a fact, becomes puerile when it is recalled that there is also a powerful and widespread fear of annihilation, and that this fear, on the same principle proves that there is nothing beyond the grave. Such childish proofs are typically theological, and they remain theological even when they are adduced by men who like to flatter themselves by believing that they are scientific gents…” — H. L. Mencken

I understand that more than a few of you may have become confused by the tone of the last quote, and may possibly have harmed innocent brain cells in the process of bringing your mind around in a 180 degree turn like that, especially if you kept looking for the punch line….

All I can say is, sorry about that…. I saw the quote, and it was just so clearly reasoned, and so logically presented, and gave such a strong message of the power of reason and doubt, I couldn’t help myself…. Plus, its inclusion here could  be considered a joke, so….. Any who, I hope you enjoyed this little trip into the less than perfectly sane areas of my head…..
_____________________________

Whew! That was an epic Pearl, to be sure…. I’m almost afraid to go proof it, but, being the dutiful lad I am…. Epic, I think, is quite accurate. Since I am so uncertain as to how the entire picture of this Pearl looks (it’s too big today to get a good grasp….), I’m going to trust my luck, and the fact that nobody really cares, and go ahead and post it…. I like it, and that is enough for me…. (Is this where I say nyah, nyah, nyah…. and make a rude gesture with my hands?…. No? Oh right, we don’t do that any more….)

I’m going to go now, before the voices get any louder, and start slipping in parenthetical thoughts on me…. Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you….

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

dozer3

Put the cheeseburger down, sir, and step back from the condiments….

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1

Ffolkes,

Traffic has been light this morning, and what is there is moving along well, so I guess it’s okay to get started…. Not that traffic has anything to do with this, but, it works on the radio, so I thought I’d give it a try…. By this time in the process, it really doesn’t matter what I do, it’s all going to be wrong, or misguided somehow, and whatever I produce will crash and burn within moments. The investigators are never able to tell afterward exactly why it crashes (the burning part is obvious…. leaking fuel, oxygen, heat, all present…. only the ‘why’ is mysterious…), but, it does. I really don’t expect them to know how to determine sabotage by icons of nature like Murphy, as he is well able to make such things appear to be due to natural causes…..

You know what I mean by that, right? Natural causes? Same thing the beloved ruling class means when they say some political prisoner died in custody, of “natural causes”, to wit: they killed them…. Oh, they might call it “pilot error” but it was “termination with prejudice”, you can bet on it….. Sorry, but anybody who, during an election campaign, says they’ll stop what is being done to people at Guantanamo, and at other facilities, in other countries, where it doesn’t break our laws so blatantly, and then totally ignores the whole issue, isn’t what I would call trustworthy, and can’t be counted on to tell the truth about anything.

SIGH…. there I go, ranting again in the intro…. It just seems to keep popping out, with little provocation. I mean, how much provocation can I claim at 5:55 in the morning, unless, for some unknown, and unwelcome, reason, I’ve been dreaming about this stuff, which I don’t think I’ve been doing…. not so’s I remember, anyway. It doesn’t matter, really, though, because I’d planned to rant today, so this can be considered a warm-up, or stretching exercises…. As long as you don’t consider it terrible, and go away, I’ll be happy….. It gets so lonely around here in the mornings, and the neighbors don’t appreciate me breaking out my guitar at this hour, so, I’m stuck with this computer, and my imaginary audience, for company…. Sad image, isn’t it?….

Don’t be sad, though, because I like it like this…. Now that much of the stress is gone from my life, of waiting for the bureaucrats to act, for my retirement to kick in, for poverty to end (at least for me…), I am able to enjoy my retirement time, getting a big kick out of watching the world run around like crazy, acting out the panoply of human stories and games, and knowing that nobody has any say about what I do, or when I do it, other than me, myself, and I…. and, of course, Patricia, to whom I’ve lost my heart…. She’s allowed to take up my time with her business on an “ad lib” basis…. but, I can’t consider that an onerous chore, or any kind of bother…. rather the opposite, truth be known….

Okay, well, I’ve blathered and meandered, and wound my way through another four paragraphs that don’t say much of anything, other than some pointless attempts at humor…. I should probably take my own advice, and not try to do that so early, especially before the coffee has kicked in fully….. but, SOMEBODY has to do it, and I’ve never been one to shirk my duty, once I know what it is….

The upshot of all this is, I’ve met the legal requirements for this blog’s opening remarks, so, I’m going to take that assessment and run with it…. If nothing else, it will prevent the formation of bruising around the eyes, where it feels as if I’ve been punching myself since I got up, twenty minutes ago…. Hmm, maybe I wasn’t done sleeping…. Ya think?…. Oh, well….

Shall we Pearl?…..
_____________________________

As noted above, I tend to rant at the slightest provocation, and, though that tendency isn’t one I particularly wish to curtail completely, it is one that contributes to at least one of the problematic characteristics of blogging, a long winded way to say it makes these posts too long sometimes…. Then, I feel guilty, for taking up so much of people’s time, and ending up preaching to the choir, anyway…. This is why I’ve been resorting so often to old-school pearls to get my points across, or at least, out there for perusal and cognitive processing… Again, in short, it’s easier, on you, and, to some extent, on me….

Yesterday, I read an article in the news (you can read it here:  http://blog.sfgate.com/nov05election/2013/08/06/planet-continues-to-warm-to-new-normal/ ) about climate change. The article discussed the yearly report, from the world’s scientific community, on the extent of the changes in the Earth’s average temperature, the changes in the polar ice, and the rising of the world’s oceans, as the increasing temperature melts those polar ice packs, little by little… The report itself makes no attempt to ascertain, or explain, the causes of the warming; it only reports the factual numbers of how much is changing each year…. It does note, however, that the levels of carbon dioxide and carbon monoxide in the atmosphere on their scale of measurement haven’t been seen on our planet for approximately 800,000 (!) years….

A little learning is a dangerous thing;
Drink deep, or taste not the Pierian spring:
There shallow draughts intoxicate the brain,
And drinking largely sobers us again.

— Alexander Pope (1688-1744) — Essay on Criticism, Part ii, Line 15

I haven’t seen the reaction yet from the fringes of the far right of the political scene, but I expect them to be out any time, once again parading the extent of their ignorance, shouting their outrage at the numbers, claiming that the scientists are “fudging” them, or claiming that we humans don’t understand what the numbers mean, because we don’t have infinite knowledge, like they do…. because “they” believe in God, which gives them the right to challenge the scientist’s figures…. If asked to do so, I could probably write one of their articles; it doesn’t seem hard, as one needn’t bother with presenting any facts, or evidence to support one’s theories…. I would, of course, feel very silly, but, I could do it….

Don’t worry, I won’t; plenty of others will do so, with much more sincerity, if less factual, than I…. It does piss me off, though, to have to watch these idiots go through their contortions, trying to refute the obvious danger that the changes reported by the scientists pose for us as a species, along with all the other species with whom we share the air we breathe… It pisses me of a lot, because they make it harder to get anything done about it, and muddy up the waters made clear by the report, never realizing that by insisting on the truth of their delusions, they are signing their own death warrant….

Rather than bore you with another rant (which, it seems from looking at this small intro, I seem to have already done….) I’ll turn to my old-school format, and bring the point home with a group of pearls…. once again highlighting the advantage to pearls of virtual wisdom, requiring much less effort to acquire than the mundane, standard types of wisdom, which ask us to display intelligence, patience, and perseverance in order to feel the boon of its presence…. Easy money, as they say downtown….

“The radical novelty in modern science lies precisely in the rejection of the belief, which is at the heart of all popular religion, that the forces which move the stars and atoms are contingent upon the preferences of the human heart.” — Walter Lippmann

“These are the pale deaths which men miscall their lives; for all the scents of green things growing, each breath is but an exhalation of the grave.  Bodies jerk like puppet corpses, and hell walks laughing” — Smart Bee

“Belief is the death of intelligence.” — Robert Anton Wilson

“Reality is when it happens to you.” — Smart Bee

“Are people more important than the grizzly bear? Only from the point of view of some people.” — Edward Abbey

`Just the place for a Snark!’ the Bellman cried,
As he landed his crew with care;
Supporting each man on the top of the tide
By a finger entwined in his hair.

‘Just the place for a Snark!  I have said it twice:
That alone should encourage the crew.
Just the place for a Snark!  I have said it thrice:
What I tell you three times is true.’

— Lewis Carroll, the Snark and the Boojum

“Ignorance is not bliss — it’s oblivion.” — Phillip Wylie
_____________________________

 

À Bas Ben AdhemMy fellow man I do not care for.
I often ask me, What’s he there for?
The only answer I can find
Is, Reproduction of his kind.
If I’m supposed to swallow that,
Winnetka is my habitat.
Isn’t it time to carve Hic Jacet
Above that Reproduction racket?

To make the matter more succint:
Suppose my fellow man extinct.
Why, who would not approve the plan
Save possibly my fellow man?
Yet with a politician’s voice
He names himself as Nature’s choice.

The finest of the human race
Are bad in figure, worse in face.
Yet just because they have two legs
And come from storks instead of eggs
They count the spacious firmament
As something to be charged and sent.

Though man created cross-town traffic,
The Daily Mirror, News and Graphic,
The pastoral fight and fighting pastor,
And Queen Marie and Lady Astor,
He hails himself with drum and fife
And bullies lower forms of life.

Not that I think much depends
On how we treat our feathered friends,
Or hold the wrinkled elephant
A nobler creature than my aunt.
It’s simply that I’m sure I can
Get on without my fellow man.

~~ Ogden Nash ~~

_____________________________

“A people who expect to be ignorant and free expect what never will, and never can, be.” — Thomas Jefferson

I almost used this as a closing remark to the rant/pearl in section one; it’s almost the right sentiment, but, didn’t quite hit the exact mark, so I’m using it here, as the opening remark for another old-school entry. Yes, it’s being a little bit lazy, but, I will reference my point above re: retirement, and the perks thereof, to wit: I don’t care if it’s lazy, it’s what I want to do, and you can’t stop me, at least, not without the risk of injury, to one or both of us…. Since neither of us is willing to see what happens in that case, let’s get on with this…. The primary search parameter for this pearl is “Risk analysis of using ignorance as a survival tool in modern society.” Or, something like that….

“Thank you, Señor MacGyver.”  “Don’t thank me, thank the gravitational pull of Earth’s moon.” — from The Simpsons

“Does history record any case where the majority was right?” — Robert Heinlein, Notebooks of Lazarus Long

“A “sucking chest wound” is nature’s way of telling you to slow down.” — Murphy’s Military Laws, #12

“The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than the fact that a drunken man is happier than a sober one. The happiness of credulity is a cheap and dangerous quality.” — George Bernard Shaw

“Far more crucial than what we know or do not know is what we do not want to know.” — Eric Hoffer

Hmm…. how did that get there? Or, more accurately, how did we get here? This comes close to what I was looking for, but, something isn’t quite right…. we’ll go on, find two more that will shore up the weak side, and bring home the point we’re trying to make….

“I used to get high on life but lately I’ve built up a resistance.  — Steven Wright”

“From stupidity there is always something to be learned, but it’s always the same thing: don’t be stupid.” — Robert M. Adams

There… that should do it…. sometimes the thread that ties it all together is thin, and hard to see, but, it generally works out okay…. in the case of this pearl, the wisdom is inherently obvious, unless one regularly fails in the task implied in the final entry….  😆
_____________________________

Well, that was fun! I don’t know how it will look to others, but, it matters little now, because the road became the journey, and I feel centered…. Hmm… Murphy must be lurking about…. I’d best go proof while I can….. I was right, (write?…), Murphy was hanging about…. That took what seemed like forever to get all the spots I got lazy with my typing… comes from it coming out so fast and smooth, I guess, I had to sit for too long to keep up… Okay, no whining, I’m done now anyway…. and, I’m outta here…. Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you….

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.gigoid

dozer3