Off with their Keds!….


“Cat philosophy: When in doubt, cop an attitude.”

~~ Smart Bee ~~



Your will is my will….

Good morning…. For someone such as myself, deeply connected to the power of the Metaphorse, the feeling with which I awoke today is terrifying…. I can’t seem to find any understanding of metaphor anywhere; my mind sits and stares blankly, just trying to make some sense of the simple, uncomplicated expressions with which I am presented, such as the fine statement of confusion, below, from our old pal Zippy…. Anyone with the most simple understanding of such matters would realize Zippy was just looking for condiments; he was probably holding a Polish Dog, so he was temporarily overcome by the olfactory stimuli…. He has such a sensitive proboscis, after all…

Nonetheless, we have a job to do…. It’s a tough job, cleaning out a mind like gigoid’s every day, but, it has to be done, or the Space/Time Continuum would take a severe beating, and nobody wants that…. So, rather than whine any more, let’s just get on with it, hoping against all hope that Smart Bee isn’t in the mood for bullshit…. I’m afraid, if that’s the case, it could get a little messy before we’re done…. Oh, well, no choice, so, let’s get on with it….

Shall we Pearl?

“Is a tattoo real, like a curb or a battleship? Or are we suffering in Safeway?” — Zippy the Pinhead


groucho and carmen

Groucho & Carmen

Image from via Google Images

Since we began the day with silly, it behooves us to continue in the vein…. What could be sillier than Groucho?….







le penseur-rodin

    In February of this year, I created a pearl of good quality, which I ended up giving a title, an extremely unusual event, to be sure. It seems to be the right choice for today’s ranting section, simply to avoid any conflict with the tone of the rest of today’s effort…. In short, it seemed like the right thing to do, so, deal with it…. Really, it’ll be fine….

From 2/12/2014:

I’ve never gone for titling Pearls of Virtual Wisdom, or pearls, either, for that matter. For this one, though, if I were asked to give it a title, it would have to be:

The Rise and Fall of Homo Erectus

We shall never cease from exploration
And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time.

~~ T. S. Eliot ~~

“Life is pleasant.  Death is peaceful.  It’s the transition that’s troublesome.” — Isaac Asimov

“Everything is simpler than you think and at the same time more complex than you imagine.” — Goethe

“Nothing is easier than self-deceit. For what each man wishes, that he also believes to be true.” — Demosthenes

“Expedients are for the hour; principles for the ages.” — Henry Ward Beecher

“If a man could pass through Paradise in a dream, and have a flower presented to him as a pledge that his soul had been there, and if he found that flower in his hand when he awoke – Aye, and what then?” — Coleridge, “Anima Poetae”

Like leaves on trees the race of man is found,–
Now green in youth, now withering on the ground;
Another race the following spring supplies:
They fall successive, and successive rise.

~~ Alexander Pope ~~

~~ The Iliad of Homer, Book vi, Line 181 ~~



Unbidden, treasure unfolded…

Taken by surprise, Psyche sits numb
   Amidst tall phrases worn of elder time
Seeking a not-new place from which to come
   No shiny new horizon, nor altered paradigm.

Sudden regrets shape dreams as times maintain
   Shades of memories bring poignant clear sight
Visions of duty, each chosen wild campaign
   Shouts echoing clamors to enfold the night.

Arisen from less than eternal havens of sleep
   Facing moments created in torment and pain
Destiny weighs upon those chosen to keep
   As the sparrow flies now to sever the twain.

Faded pathways lead away, hazy and long
   Burned out verges, so long unknown
Images of yesterday, clear and strong
   Bleed into today, though t’is but my own……

~~ gigoid ~~

“Poetry–even bad poetry–may be our final hope.” — Edward Abbey



    Okay, that does it…. This is the last time I give SB, or anyone, for that matter, free rein to pick out their own pearls…. The following nine-star group of gems (for lack of a better word) has to be the strangest damn pearl I’ve ever seen…. But, it all hangs together, and, damn it all if it doesn’t make a weird kind of sense…. You tell me….

“You can lead a yak to water but you can’t teach an old dog to make a silk purse out of a pig in a poke.” — Opus

“Happiness is inward, and not outward; and so, it does not depend on what we have, but on what we are.” — Henry Van Dyke

“To say yes, you have to sweat and roll up your sleeves and plunge both hands into life up to the elbows. It’s easy to say no, even if it means dying.” — Jean Anouilh

“While all things have their opposites, it is also true that in each the spirit of the opposite exists. — Hazrat Inayat Khan, Sufi writer

“I reject that philosophy. The impossible often has a kind of integrity which the merely improbable lacks.” — Douglas Adams through Dirk Gently

“Clay is moulded to make a vessel, but the utility of the vessel lies in the space where there is nothing. … Thus, taking advantage of what is, we recognize the utility of what is not.” — Lao Tzu

“If a camel flies, no one laughs if it doesn’t get very far.” — Paul White

“So, this doesn’t mean anything, but at least it’s not obvious nonsense.” — Hugh Young

“‘Scuze me while I kiss the sky…” — Jimi Hendrix, Purple Haze


I think, maybe, tomorrow, I will take a bit more interest in what takes place here…. Today’s effort, such as it is, was brought to you by the number 13, and through the kind auspices of that fine old philanthropic institution, Bones For Bozos; fortunately, for them AND us, they didn’t know anything about it. I’ll be back tomorrow, to see if some sort of amends can be made to all who were offended by today’s nonsense…. We’ve got a slush fund that may be able to help any who suffered DNA damage…. As long as I’m not incarcerated at some undisclosed location, I’ll see y’all tomorrow, ffolkes….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark,Theresa, & Richy
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

Sometimes I sits and thinks,
   and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid, the dubious

The *only* duly authorized Computer Curmudgeon.


“SCRAM!!!!!!!!!!”- Oscar the Grouch


À bientôt, mon cherí….


Happy ever after as a plot device….

While it is useful for intimidating police, and keeping relatives at an acceptable distance, insanity can be… well, insane, to try to cope with on a regular basis. This characteristic is one of the many that keeps me from just falling into its warm embrace permanently. Once I give in and let meself go, I’m fairly certain I won’t be back, not for many a day, as the song goes….. I’m pretty sure it would be too comfortable…..

In fact, having spent a fair amount of time gracing the company of those who totally give up trying to be normal, those who instead spend their time doing exactly what they are hoping will feel the best, given their already confused state of mind, I KNOW it is more comfortable than anywhere sanity can go.

There is no pressure to be right, no pressure to not be wrong, and those are no small things, in a world that places premium importance on them. The insane, by the nature of their condition, and because of what others think they know of it, are possibly the happiest people in the world, as they don’t have to live up to any of the standards the rest of society is so invested in….

Why, you may ask, would anyone wish to be sane, in that case? That is a good question, not one I can answer without ranting, at least a bit, and I promised I wouldn’t do that in the intro any more. Well, it wasn’t a promise, just an intent, but, hey, almost the same, and I’m sure nobody else wants a rant so early in the day, either, so, back off….

Sanity, as practiced by most of those in society, is not a very comfortable, or easy, state in which to be for long, requiring as it does constant alertness, and regular maintenance, to keep it from falling apart under the daily assaults by Reality, and the kind attention of Murphy and his ilk…..

Insanity, on the other hand, has no stress, no pressure, and no responsibility; whatever one decides to do, no matter how outrageous, or out of touch with the real world it may be, is okay, and allowed. No limits are applicable, so the insane are free to let their imagination have free rein, and the results are incredible, to say the least…. Not always comprehensible, or easy to watch, or to deal with, but incredible, for sure… No sane person will ever be able to create art as powerful as a person whose grip on reality is less firm as their own, as they tend to set limits for themselves, as needed to retain that sanity…. thus shutting out that entire realm of imaginative possibility…

So, next time you have to cope with reality, consider how easy it would be to just let go, and not worry about whether what you are doing is the right thing…. It may not keep you from going down that road, but it may help you find a reason to stay on the road to sanity…. and, in the best-case-scenario, maybe, just maybe, you can learn to let that side out now and again, to find out what there may be there, that can be brought into the world, to share the beauty, or the wisdom, or the love that they know, in a universe with no limits… Remember, all the nicest ffolkes in the world are just a little bit tetched, as my father used to say….

But, for now, I think it’s time to draw this intro to a close, before it assumes epic proportions…. Shall we Pearl?…..

“Reality can be hazardous to your health.” — Smart Bee

This one is probably not a surprise, nor is it something that is rare, or uncommonly known. Hell, it only takes a couple of years of living on this planet before this knowledge becomes second nature to us, and we know it almost instinctively. This, I think, is part of why it is always a surprise to us how the process of growing older is much more difficult than we imagined…. It is also why we always end up, at one point or another, saying to ourselves, “Why the hell didn’t anyone tell me this?” It may not be a conspiracy, but the end result is the same, because nobody is talking, and if they had any compassion, they would be….

Your guess as to why this is would be as good as mine, and I’m not sure it matters; what matters is that they don’t, and it isn’t included in any of the manuals we receive about Life and How to Live…. Actually, I don’t know about y’all, but my manuals were all lost in the mail, and I never got any of them… We WERE supposed to get them right? I mean, there is a God, by all reports from the rest of society, and according to dogma and stuff, we’re His responsibility, right? So, where’s my manual?…. Where is yours?….

Don’t try to tell me you’re buying into the Bible as the manual? Have you ever read that thing? It is the most inconsistent, poorly written, manipulative, and just plain most erroneous piece of literature I ever tried to plow my way through… Hell, the first chapter is complete science fiction, or more accurately, fantasy, and it goes downhill from there, in terms of what is believable…. I guess, even if all of the hundreds of different authors WERE connected in spirit, and only channeling the Word of God, it still has to all be based on events that have some basis in reality, or it just isn’t going to hold together, logically, or consistently…. There just isn’t any possible way to get a correct answer when the basis of an argument is false… The principle of GIGO trumps delusional assumptions, at least in the real world….

“The Bible is true this I know, for the Bible tells me so.” — Jordan Henderson

Okay, so if there aren’t any manuals, and the only folks out there offering to help are those who are doing so out of their own desire to control other folks, then how do we learn to accept all the hardships that come with growing older? Well, let’s see…. As I sit and consider that question, it keeps growing larger in scope, and the number of potential answers approaches infinity, so, I guess I need to narrow the focus a bit…. Hmm, break time…. gotta cogitate on this one….

“Men spend their lives in anticipations, in determining to be vastly happy at some period when they have time.  But the present time has one advantage over every other – it is our own.  Past opportunities are gone, future have not come.  We may lay in a stock of pleasures, as we would lay in a stock of wine; but if we defer the tasting of them too long, we shall find that both are soured by age.” — C. C. Colton

Okay, that isn’t a bad insight, all in all…. but, it doesn’t quite fill the bill for our discussion, for while it acknowledges the power of aging, it doesn’t offer any solutions, or advice, other than in a passive, negative sense…. More, please….

“Differences of habit and language are nothing at all if our aims are identical and our hearts are open.” — J.K. Rowling, The Beginning, — Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire, 2000, — spoken by the character Albus Dumbledore

Hmm… a clue, I think, of the direction we are seeking to find…. a bit more fine tuning, I think….

“Bear, do not blame, what cannot be changed.” — Publius Syrus

Another clue…. we must be on the right track….

“Never give an inch!” — Smart Bee

Okay, we’re almost there, cuz the pearls are getting shorter, and deeper, always a good sign….

“I’m not a lawyer, but I play one on the guitar.” — Smart Bee

Well, see, I told you…. the perfect ending to a discussion of Reality, and how we deal with it over time….. In other words, ffolkes, you can’t really win, in the sense for which we are seeking to find a reasonable justification… The game is rigged, and it’s the only one in town…. But, it also implies that we can still walk away a winner, we just have to change the rules in our own minds….

In short, ffolkes, we’re on our own out here in Reality, and aging can either be a burden to bear, or an advantage to take…. It’s all up to us, ultimately, and we not only shouldn’t worry about whether or not there is anyone who can relieve us of this responsibility, but should understand that the act of doing so only makes the issue more difficult….

So, buck up, ffolkes…. Yes, Life gets tough, but, if we are smart, we can get tougher….

“I love ROCK ‘N ROLL!  I memorized the all WORDS to “WIPE-OUT” in 1965!!” — Zippy the Pinhead

Since I’m just that kind of guy, and I don’t have one of my own ready to bleed out, here’s a two-fer from Master Yeats, with a prologue….  Enjoy!  🙂

“No poems can please nor live long which are written by water-drinkers.” — Horace (65-8 B.C.)

A Drinking Song

WINE comes in at the mouth
And love comes in at the eye;
That’s all we shall know for truth
Before we grow old and die.
I lift the glass to my mouth,
I look at you, and I sigh.

William Butler Yeats

A Drunken Man’s Praise Of Sobriety

COME swish around, my pretty punk,
And keep me dancing still
That I may stay a sober man
Although I drink my fill.

Sobriety is a jewel
That I do much adore;
And therefore keep me dancing
Though drunkards lie and snore.
O mind your feet, O mind your feet,
Keep dancing like a wave,
And under every dancer
A dead man in his grave.
No ups and downs, my pretty,
A mermaid, not a punk;
A drunkard is a dead man,
And all dead men are drunk.

William Butler Yeats

“In the words of Shankarachaya, “All impossible things can be made possible save the bringing of the fool’s mind to the point of truth.”” — Hazrat Inayat Khan (Sufi writer)

Sufi is a philosophy whose written words are not very familiar to me, as I’ve never made a study of them, beyond a superficial one, to get a gauge of its scope. I like this, though, and it says a lot to me that the author was able to independently come to a conclusion that is common to many other philosophies I admire, to wit: “Against stupidity, the gods themselves contend in vain.” It is a sentiment that, in a way, defines humanity, while at the same time, points out the fly in the ointment, so to speak….

Our minds, given the power of imagination, are our strength, our greatest tool in the fight for survival in this universe; they are also our greatest frailty, our Achilles heel, as it were. Imagination can show us how to survive, and live; it can also makes us afraid for no reason, other than our own ignorance. Our intelligence is our greatest ally, and our worst enemy…. and it is this contradiction that keeps us from achieving that serenity in society that is possible on an individual basis…..

You see, there are way too many unscrupulous people who DO know how to use their imaginations, to their OWN advantage, who are in positions of influence in society, and they are able to manipulate the vast numbers of people who choose to allow ignorance to rule their existence, all of whom would rather die than try to think their way out of a problem. These “fools” are controlled very easily, as they actually prefer to not have to use what sits on their shoulders for anything other than passing comestibles to their stomachs, and will believe pretty much anything told to them, as long as it is on TV…..

Here on this blog, I rail at this segment of humanity quite regularly, not that it does much to alter the situation. But, it is all I can do at the moment, so I keep on shouting into the wind, and preaching to the choir, because, naturally, the ffolkes who end up coming here are generally those who are already well-practiced at using their minds, or at least, not giving in to the urge to ignore reality. But, someday, perhaps, if and when I ever get off my ass to go try to find an agent, or a publisher, more folks will hear my plaintive cries for sanity, and it may actually have some kind of positive effect on matters…

What the hell, everybody’s gotta have a dream, right? Right…. well, that’s mine….. If I can bring some truth into the world, and spread it around where it can do some good, well, I can die a happy man, because that’s about all one can expect from this cold, hard universe… and it’s enough….

“Baby, after considerable thought I’ve reached the conclusion that the only conceivable legitimate answer to the Universe as constituted is a peal of hysterical laughter.” — Keith Laumer, _Night of Delusions_

It took some patience, but that final pearl came through just in time, and perfectly closed the third section, with a statement with which I can wholeheartedly agree…. All in all, today’s effort isn’t too shabby, so we’re letting it go as is, sans critical judgment, though proofed and polished as best I may…. which means there is, no doubt, at least one hidden typo, that I won’t notice until it is posted…. Ah well, that’s life in the slow lane, I guess….  Y’all take care out there, and May the Metaphorse be with you…..

Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.