Reason to be aloof….

Ffolkes,

“Everything in excess!
To enjoy the flavor of life, take big bites.
Moderation is for monks.”

~~ Lazarus Long, from Robert A. Heinlein’s “Time Enough For Love” ~~

ketchikan early

Ketchikan, Alaska, before the invasion….

Hajime…. In my experience, the most difficult part of the continued presence of PTSD in my life is what occurred yesterday. I call it SOD, or, sudden onset depression, a euphemistic acronym, which makes it sound all official and clean, when, in truth, it’s a dirty fucking mess. I’ll be cruising along, & will see, or hear, or experience some sort of stimulus, the nature of which is always unclear before it shows itself. This time, I saw a picture/story on FB, about an abused animal, & before I knew it, tears were flowing down my cheeks, and my mood plummeted into the depths….

Not a happy time, especially since it coincided with the onset of some pretty heavy pain. Go figure, eh? Murphy had a field day with me yesterday; he’ll be gloating for months. And I? I have spent the last 24 or so hours in a deep funk, fighting my way toward some light, only to find myself still grumpy and feeling mean today. Leelu and I are at odds, and I can’t find it in me to bring myself to any sort of quiet, safe harbor, where I could at least look for my center, with some hope of finding it. I tell ya, ffolkes; this ain’t no fun….

I did write a poem while in the throes of misery; I can’t say how it will seem, but, it sure is an accurate description of how I felt at the time, so, we’ll let it stay, & call it confession, which, they say, is good for the soul. I’ll have to take their word for it, as confession has always seemed like a cop-out to me, a way to avoid taking responsibility. But, that’s just me, and, if it helps get this done today, I’ll take it.

I’ll help myself, too, I guess, by ceasing this litany of woe, in favor of getting on with today’s mess. It’s a typical Pearl, but, with some rather ‘different’ material with which to contend; I’d suggest an adult beverage, or good strong coffee, preferably Irish, at minimum. The rest of y’all should think about insurance. Me, I’m going to just get on with this, so, I can go to my room and pout…. Let’s get it done….

Shall we Pearl?….

He said, “Dance for me” and he said,
“You are too beautiful for the wind
To pick at, or the sun to burn.” He said,
“I’m a poor tattered thing, but not unkind
To the sad dancer and the dancing dead.”

~~ Sidney Keyes, “Four Postures of Death” ~~

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PHOTO-Asleep_At_The_Wheel-WEB

Damn! That’s one big cowboy!

Image from http://www.midstatefair.com via Google Images

After my dad retired from the US Army, we moved to a small town in central California, where raising cattle, and/or, growing alfalfa to feed cattle, were the primary industries. As might be imagined, they listened to a lot of country & western music. I spent much of my teen years at dances where the mix of music ran from the Doors, to the Stones, to the Beatles, and, to this band, who have long been an iconic western swing band. It’s straight out, down-home Texas style swing, ffolkes. Lots of twang, but some of the best dancing music to be found… The picture sucks, but the sound’s pretty good….. Enjoy!….

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Asleep At The Wheel

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https://youtu.be/CziPAbs3ROY

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“Six mistakes mankind keeps making century after century:
Believing that personal gain is made by crushing others;
Worrying about things that cannot be changed or corrected;
Insisting that a thing is impossible because we cannot accomplish it;
Refusing to set aside trivial preferences;
Neglecting development and refinement of the mind;
Attempting to compel others to believe and live as we do.”

~~ Cicero ~~

We the People...

“A power has risen up in the government greater than the people themselves, consisting of many and various and powerful interests, combined into one mass, and held together by the cohesive power of the vast surplus in the banks.” — Johann L. Uhland (1787-1862) — Speech, May 27, 1836

For several days now, I’ve been saving this quote for a rant. Naturally, the intended targets are those assholes who have managed to establish a world-wide oligarchy, which is busy destroying the world as we know it, in complete ignorance of anything that doesn’t serve their narcissism. While pondering the issue, I was brought down, down to the ground, by the sudden onset of depression. This, as you may imagine, rather killed whatever rant was brewing. To sublimate for today, here is an old school pearl, which covers most of what I might have said. I hope you enjoy this ‘savior’ pearl, which has saved you from yet another rant by gigoid…. I’ll even add an extra pearl at the end, from one of the first philosophers to take shots at the concept of government…. Enjoy!….

From 8/9/2012:

Since I have already ranted, I’ll save you from another right away by giving this old school pearl…. These quotations all point in the same direction, and will lead eventually to yet another fine reason to mistrust the beloved ruling class…..

Then came the churches,
then came the schools,
then came the lawyers,
then came the rules.

~~ Mark Knopfler ~~

“A man cannot be too careful in the choice of his enemies.” — Oscar Wilde, “The Picture of Dorian Grey”, 1891

“People are always talking about tradition, but they forget we have a tradition of a few hundred years of nonsense and stupidity, that
there is a tradition of idiocy, incompetence and crudity.” — Hugo Demartini, in “Contemporary Artists”, 1977

“People are very open-minded about new things — as long as they’re exactly like the old ones.” — Charles F. Kettering

The Government is my shepherd, I shall not work. It maketh me to lie down on good jobs. It leadeth me beside the still factories. It destroyeth my initiative; It leadeth me in the paths of the parasite for politics sake; Yea, though I walk in the valley of Deficit Spending, I will fear no evil, For the Government is with me; its doles and its vote-getters they comfort me. It prepareth an Economic Utopia for me by appropriating the earnings of my grandchildren. It filleth my head with baloney, my inefficiency runneth over; Surely the Government shall care for me all the days of my life And I shall live in a Fool’s Paradise forever. — The Government’s 23rd Psalm

“By definition, a government has no conscience. Sometimes it has a policy, but nothing more.” — Albert Camus

“No matter how you vote, a government still gets elected.” — Smart Bee

That should about do it, I think….. if nothing else, one may get a clear picture of how I feel about government…..

Note from the future; here’s your bonus round, to finish off our indictment of the BRC….

“… But when he [the people’s champion] has disposed of foreign enemies by conquest or treaty, and there is nothing to fear from them, then he is always stirring up some war or other, in order that the people may require a leader.” — Plato (428-348? B.C.), “The Republic”

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Comedy_Tragedy

What the fuck is this?

Insanity waits patiently for me, sitting
in the corner, quietly knitting a psyche knot,
for my throat.

Depression is sitting on the couch, close
by the window, sulking over a broken pot;
he broke it.

Loneliness dogs my solitude, madly barking
into my left ear, while I trot,
half-heartedly, at best.

All my old friends have come to visit today;
a party, at which I was not
wanted, nor invited, .

What if I just ignore them all, I think;
even if it never worked before.
Oh, well.

The darkness fills the day, then carries into night,
until time has passed, until it feels just right.
No peace, no common dreams of light,
no escape, nor safety in flight.

Even poetry hurts.

~~ gigoid ~~

6/1/2016

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pearls_3

Naked Pearls

Obscurely Subtle

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“He took his vorpal sword in hand
Long time the manxom foe he sought
Till rested he by the tumtum tree
And stood awhile in thought”

~~ Jabberwocky, by Lewis Carroll ~~

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“You become responsible, forever, for what you have tamed.”

~~ The Little Prince, chapter XXI ~~

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“The supreme triumph of reason is to cast doubt upon its own validity.”

~~ Miguel de Unamuno ~~

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“When you drink the water, remember the spring.”

~~ Chinese Proverb ~~

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“If you are distressed by anything external,
the pain is not due to the thing itself,
but to your own estimate of it;
and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.”

~~ Marcus Aurelius ~~

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“Entropy requires no maintenance.”

~~ Amanda Walker ~~

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“It is in the shelter of each other that people live.”

~~ Irish proverb ~~

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“When friends ask, there is no tomorrow.”

~~ Ancient Human Proverb ~~

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“What happens to your fist when you open your hand?”

~~ Zen Buddhism ~~

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I’m a crazy old fart, I guess. (The fact I am sitting here, weeping as if my dog died yesterday seems like rather conclusive proof to me….) But, I’m happy-go-lucky, too, so, that’s something. I’ll be back tomorrow, ffolkes. I’ll offer no opinions of how that might look, nor any assurances of any sort of quality literature. But, I’ll be here, with a Pearl for your perusal. You see, THIS is what brings me back from the edge. This is what saves my sorry ass from ending up in jail, or dead…..What you have seen today is what keeps me from taking the bit between my remaining teeth, hoisting Henry’s black flag, and slitting the nearest throats. Believe it. So, I’ll see y’all tomorrow; it’s more important than you know…. to me…..

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark,Theresa, & Richy
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid, the dubious

The *only* duly authorized Computer Curmudgeon.

PLEASE STOP READING THIS MESSAGE NOW.

“SCRAM!!!!!!!!!!”- Oscar the Grouch

À bientôt, mon cherí….

Don’t flatter the sycophants, Eddie; they’ll start preening….

Ffolkes,

“Don’t take life too serious. It ain’t no ways permanent.”

~~ Pogo, by Walt Kelly ~~

Galway abandoned church

Subtle colors on an abandoned church ~~ Galway


Hajime…. I’m beginning to like the martial opening we’ve been using lately; my life, for the past nearly thirteen months, in retrospect, seems to have been one long battle with my own body, simply for the sake of expediency on the part of a corporate slave, mistakenly labeled a doctor. I have hopes the battle is nearing an end, but, in the meantime, I remain in a position of being an insomniac for days at a time, in spite of all I have tried to do to hasten or mitigate the process of surviving this external assault upon my health. Tonight is looking as if I’ll be up again until dawn, at which time I’ll either collapse, or find a pocket of energy to pass a semi-normal day. Ah well, at least the pain relief part is working; that’s a big plus….

There. The whine has been served; sorry there aren’t any crackers to go with it. We’ll have to make do with a bit of cheesy humor to cut the acidity a trifle. Hmm, how ’bout this?

What did the chicken say when she laid a square egg?….

“Ouch!”

If that isn’t cheesy enough for y’all, I’ll just have to consider myself a failure, because it’s the best, or, in this case, the worst I can do. Hey, it made a young pitcher smile during a game, many years ago, when I told it to him to calm him down after two straight walks. If it got a smile out of a stressed-out young athlete in the middle of a game, y’all can certainly give it at least a raised eyebrow, or maybe a snicker. Snickers are good; I sure wish I could still eat them. Sadly, the nuts would cause way more trouble than a few moments of bliss is worth.

Okay, so, let’s see how we’re doing…. A bit of complaining disguised as introspection, check. A strong touch of silly, check. Cool childhood memory, check. Surreal non-sequitor following a VERY odd segue from smarm to candy in one and a half sentences, double check. Not bad for somebody who’s been up for, hmm, let’s see now…. oh, right. About 64-plus hours, and counting. Let’s see YOU be funny that far into the throes of clinical insanity! Hah!

I see now, it’s time to get on with this. If I don’t, I’m liable to do, or say something I’ll regret, and, like Lazarus said, “When the ship lifts, all bills are paid. No regrets, ever.” I’m not sure what he means by that (yes, I am….), but, it sounds pretty intelligent, and right now, it’s also the best I can come up with. Rather than try again, I’ll merely say this: Luigi! Get us the hell out of here, now!

Shall we Pearl?….

“I hate mankind, for I think myself one of the best of them, and I know how bad I am.” — Samuel Johnson

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asleep at the wheel

Asleep At The Wheel

Image from amarillo.com via Google Images


I remember growing up on the music style epitomized by this band, later learning to play quite a bit of it myself, when my friend Tommy and I would get together to play guitar. The style is called western swing; this group has epitomized the sound for as long as I can remember…. which is getting to be a pretty long time now…. Enjoy, ffolkes; it’s called easy listening….

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Asleep At The Wheel

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mars-curiosity-rover-mineral-stew

Rocky Outcrop on Mars

Image by NASA’s Curiosity Rover, November 2015, from Space.com


You may well wonder why an image from Mars adorns the top of today’s ranting section. Since I’m the one who put it there, I suppose that makes me responsible to tell y’all WHY I would rant about some random piece of rather unattractive real estate on another planet. SIGH….

Well, if I MUST explain something so obvious, I’d best be about doing it, hadn’t I? Okay, it’s like this. The article on Space.com mentioned the picture was causing some excitement among scientists, as it seems a great many of the rocky soil you see is just jam-packed with all sorts of useful minerals, metals, and other substances of industrial use to Earthly technology. In other words, Mars is an untapped treasure chest of materials which are growing scarce on our planet…. Is it becoming any clearer? Does that suggest anything rantable to anyone?

I hope so, for it certainly does to me. Our species has almost turned this planet into one large desert; give us a century or two, and there won’t be a growing thing left on Earth, but for in greenhouses, possibly underground, using solar power to run the machines, since, without plants, the climate and landscape would not be somewhere anyone would wish to live. The resources on Mars means we have an entire NEW planet to rape, and pillage, and turn into another vast series of skyscrapers, freeways, and parking lots.

Oh, joy….. Get it now? When you or I look at such a picture, we see the endless vista as a chance for exploration, and the possibility of increasing our understanding. There are many in our world who will look on it as land to be developed. And, if, as the report mentions, the rock on this hill is a treasure mine of a group of valuable substances, you can bet there is some oligarch or speculator type out there in the banking world who is already looking into securing the mineral rights, and the right to build McDonald’s signs all the way to the horizon….

“Well, they paved Paradise, put up a parking lot, with a pink hotel and a swinging hot spot….” — Joni Mitchell

While I wish I could finish this rant, circumstances have intervened to preclude further diatribe. I know, you’re disappointed. So am I. But, it’s now a bit after 3 AM, and my brain is officially off-duty at 3. Anything I tried to logic from here could turn ugly, so, we’ll leave it for another thyme. It’s nice having access to a Tardis, I’ll admit; even when I fall asleep at the wheel, it takes me where I need to go, which is not Mars. Not today, anyway.  I may end up there, should my presence be required, but, that’s a pretty long shot, I’d say.

Basta. Let’s go see what happens down below, before we get silly, and spoil the whole tenor of the section….. Ranting in soprano, or baritone, for that matter, isn’t as easy as it may sound…. Especially in the thin atmosphere on Mars….

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Comedy_Tragedy

    I’m not certain, but, I’m pretty sure this one was written on a day much like today has been/will be, may the memory of it fade quickly from my ken…. again. It’ll do, for now, again….


Dead Hands,Typing…

Puzzled anew by anomalous blocks of pain
caught, bemused, chained to routine, insane.
Stilled within breathless beauty
 Engaging epiphany, insistent, called to duty.

Knees bent in lieu of a faithful rendition
suffuses, confuses, locked into stale perdition.
Clearing corrosion with hands encased in stone
Singular frozen follicles, masked by bone.

Partial focus brings unfiltered flavors to light
coloring each particle in simple delight.
Forlorn, novel conceptual artists singing in tune
nine notes in harmony, soft as the moon.

Honed blades of carbon steel flash in rhyme,
filling sensual receptors well past closing time.
Borrowed from neighbors in a week-old game
still bloody, without a proper name.

No flooded memories can justify such cost
no simple stationery, bilious, afraid, lost.
Ten times ten will never be enough
To fill so empty a stolen trough.

Bartering simplicity takes well into the night
solidly temporary pillars turned bright.
Unknown to all the pretty children who came
none were called, none had any remaining flame.

~~ gigoid ~~


Written 2/25/2015

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pearls_3

    This one is a classic pearl; short, pithy statements, deep, wide, and clear. Of course, you have to follow the bouncing idea ball, but, hey, I can’t do everything! Don’t worry, you’ll see; this one’s easy…..

How admirable, he who thinks not,
Life is fleeting,
When he sees the lightning!

~~ Basho ~~


“Wonders never cease, as long as you never cease to wonder.” — Reflective Bee

“If you do not wish a thing heard, do not say it.” — Klingon proverb

“Except for our thoughts, there is nothing absolutely in our power.” — Descartes

“Without music, life would be a mistake.” — Friedrich Nietzsche

“Ignorance of one’s misfortunes is clear gain.” — Euripides

“There is no God. But it does not matter. Man is enough.” — Edna St. Vincent Milay, Conversation at Midnight

“Better a cruel truth than a comfortable delusion.” — Edward Abbey

“Everything is simpler than you think and at the same time more complex than you imagine.” — Goethe

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Though I have little recollection of doing so, it seems to be done. I’ll take it, as it’s getting hard to stay focused. I think I’ll go pace a while. Y’all can go do whatever you like; me, I’m going to pace, and dream of sleep….. See y’all tomorrow, unless I AM sleeping….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest Carole, Mark,Theresa, & Richy
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

Sometimes I sits and thinks,
   and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid, the dubious

The *only* duly authorized Computer Curmudgeon.

PLEASE STOP READING THIS MESSAGE NOW.

“SCRAM!!!!!!!!!!”- Oscar the Grouch

dozer3


À bientôt, mon cherí….