Paleolithic cave art on Buchanan Street….


In the course of normal events, we would have no real interest in finishing sentences, unless they are of the type given on conviction of a pundit for chicanery…. Since what takes place here on a regular, daily basis couldn’t ever be described as normal, or even in the same universe as normal, that has never caused us any particular difficulties…. until now…. What’s so different about today? Well, I’ll tell ya….

Not a damn thing I can see…. It’s just another in a long series of non-sequitur beginnings to these Pearls, applied, as always, with a certain degree of reluctance, lest anyone notice it isn’t exactly legal…. How? Well, how the hell would I know? Am I a legislator, or a lawyer, who would give half a shit about the law? No, I’m not, so quit asking so damn many questions…. It’s plainly written on the door outside when the lawyers will be in their offices, so stop bothering me with all this extraneous BS, okay?….

Sorry, I don’t mean to be grumpy…. I’m a bit foggy today, and the coffee doesn’t seem to be cutting through it quite so efficiently as usual….. Hence this odd, stop & start, just plain weird beginning to what otherwise would be an excellent day…. My business in the BBR yesterday went well, (I found a doctor that not only listened to me, but actually was able to understand me without having to bring a dictionary with them), and my pain today isn’t too bad so far…. Life is good….

Such an auspicious start to the day makes me nervous, as you may know, because it CAN mean our old friend, Murphy, has something delightful planned for me later on…. I’ve had far too many days in my life like this to feel completely comfortable when things go so smoothly; Reality has exploded on me enough times to make me wary of trusting it, particularly when it tries to convince me it resembles a baby’s bottom, and that I can trust things will go smoothly…. I’m just a little too old to fall for that one…. Hence, my skittishness, and this broken, misbegotten, sorry excuse for an intro…. Remember, all you can do, is all you can do…. At this point, this is all I can do….

That being the case, it’s probably best if we just get on with it….. I’ll stop trying to rescue this, and y’all can get rid of any trash you accumulated on the, no doubt, longer-than-necessary time spent in getting to this point, while we wait for the pilot to finish moving the plane into the takeoff position…. Oh, didn’t I tell you? Today, we’re flying off to a previously uncharted, incredibly rich, bed of oysters I found, somewhere out in the South Pacific…. I’m going to dive there today, to try to find some new and exciting pearls, while y’all hang out on the nearby resort island, sipping daiquiris until I’m done, okay? Sounds like a plan to me…..

Shall we Pearl?….

The question was once put to him, how we ought to behave to our friends; and the answer he gave was, “As we should wish our friends to behave to us.” — Diogenes Laertius (c. 200 AD) — Aristotle, xi

Recently, there have been some articles in the news regarding a huge business merger, one so bit it is being examined for monopoly and trust issues by the government agency that has oversight in that arena…. A large corporation, Comcast, was approved to purchase, and merge with, another very large communication corporation, Time-Warner, in a deal that gives them control of about 35% of the entire cable market, including the provision of internet access to users…. This same company now wants to make a deal with another large company in the entertainment field, a deal which would improve the bottom line for both, but, at the same time, indicates that the consumer is going to suffer the indignity of price fixing, and reduction of net neutrality,  as the company explores its new ability to discriminate in the way it provides access, a perk awarded by the courts….

It’s a complex legal issue, and one that is guaranteed to put any of the public who try to pay attention right to sleep in their chairs…. deliberately, because these companies don’t really WANT the public to know what they’re up to, not until it is “fait accompli”, and nothing can be done to change it. Sadly enough, it’s also so boring and complex, I don’t feel up to breaking it down enough for exploration today, nor do I feel up to the task of pointing out the need to stop things like this from happening, or we won’t have our free internet to play with anymore….

Since I DON’T feel up to ranting today, (my level of curmudgeonry is kinda low…… plenty of outrage, but not much angst, and definitely not enough clarity of mind….), this will have to revert to an old-school format, or nothing…. Since that isn’t an option any more, (we already have SOMETHING, thus, ’tis impossible to have nothing….), I’m going to go for a dive, and see what I can find…. wish me luck, y’all…

“There is an enormous oyster here with its shell tightly closed. Interesting. Interesting. There seems to be something written on the underside of the oyster.”….. — Smart Bee

“It is better to copulate than never.” — Lazarus Long

“As long as you live, keep learning how to live.” — Seneca

“The important thing is not to stop questioning.  Curiosity has its own reason for existing.  One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of  reality. It is enough if one tries merely to comprehend a little of this mystery every day.  Never lose a holy curiosity.” — Albert Einstein

“Humankind cannot stand very much reality.” — T.S. Eliot

Dionysus the Elder, being asked whether he was at leisure, he replied, “God forbid that it should ever befall me!” — Plutarch (46-120 AD) — Dionysus

“C is for cookie, it’s good enough for me; oh cookie cookie cookie starts with C.” — Cookie Monster

There…. If THAT doesn’t tickle your fancy, I don’t have one…..

This poem is one of my personal favorites, which is a big part of why it is being used here, again…. Besides, how can one lose, with poetry such as this in their head, and thus, in their spirit?…. That’s correct…. in that case, one cannot lose….

A Draught Of Sunshine

Hence Burgundy, Claret, and Port,
Away with old Hock and madeira,
Too earthly ye are for my sport;
There’s a beverage brighter and clearer.
Instead of a pitiful rummer,
My wine overbrims a whole summer;
My bowl is the sky,
And I drink at my eye,
Till I feel in the brain
A Delphian pain –
Then follow, my Caius! then follow:
On the green of the hill
We will drink our fill
Of golden sunshine,
Till our brains intertwine
With the glory and grace of Apollo!
God of the Meridian,
And of the East and West,
To thee my soul is flown,
And my body is earthward press’d. –
It is an awful mission,
A terrible division;
And leaves a gulph austere
To be fill’d with worldly fear.
Aye, when the soul is fled
To high above our head,
Affrighted do we gaze
After its airy maze,
As doth a mother wild,
When her young infant child
Is in an eagle’s claws –
And is not this the cause
Of madness? – God of Song,
Thou bearest me along
Through sights I scarce can bear:
O let me, let me share
With the hot lyre and thee,
The staid Philosophy.
Temper my lonely hours,
And let me see thy bowers
More unalarm’d!

~~ John Keats ~~


I’ve been cheating a lot lately…. That, I imagine, is partly a function of having written so much in the last three years or so…. I’ve got too much in my head every day to get ALL of it down on the screen to share, and some mornings, such as today, my brain doesn’t want to cooperate with the program, by exerting itself enough to rant…. I guess I’m getting mellow in my old age, eh?……

Nah, not really much chance of THAT happening…. but, I AM still plenty lazy, (it’s all part and parcel of being smarter than the average bear, you know? We’re always looking for an easier way to do stuff…..)….. which I don’t mind a bit, as long as I can still get done all I wish to do…. which I do, having decided long ago that whatever I did was okay by me…. It’s really a damn good policy, you ought to try it…..

Any who…. here is a pretty good religirant, from a couple of years ago, in December, a month that, apparently, I spent writing some pretty decent rants…. Enjoy!…..


From 12/7/2012:

“Heaven goes by favor. If it went by merit, you would stay out and your dog would go in.” — Mark Twain

As is his stock in trade, Mr. Twain once again gives humanity a solid poke in the ribs, in a humorous, even comfortable way that makes us want to laugh about our all-too-human foibles, instead of crying, which would really be more appropriate. In his assessment of both the character of most men, and most dogs, he is absolutely correct, and shows in one simple, sardonic phrase, just how ugly people can be. In fact, I can honestly say that, in my life, I have met many more dogs who deserve to go to Heaven, than I have men or women. Of course, I wouldn’t wish that on any dog, but, you know what I mean. Dogs are better ffolkes than most folks, in the world I see around me….

This, naturally, leads me to a perfect jump-off point for a religirant…. “Heaven goes by favor”  This is all too accurate; in order to get into the club, one has to meet a certain standard, that of faith. Of course that standard is pretty easy to meet, as all it requires is a verbal commitment ( accompanied,  I suppose by a heart-felt commitment….) that one believes in JC, or Mohammed, or Buddha, or whomever, and will try to follow their teachings. No pressure to actually do so, just commit to it, and you’re in. Or, go ahead and live your life walking the path of evil, then convert on the deathbed, and you’re in…. according to their rules…. Or, in other words, it’s all who you know…..

“An ancient buddha said, Mountains are mountains; waters are waters. These words do not mean mountains are mountains; they mean mountains are mountains.” — Dogen

I’ve recently been reading an author whose work I had read in my youth, when I was devouring science fiction on a daily basis. Samuel R. Delany wrote a number of powerful novels, as well as shorter works. The most recent I read, Babel-17, uses the structure and meaning of words in language as the basis for the plot.

In the book, he relates how important perception is to meaning, and how the way we use language can actually work to program the brain, just like the organic computer it is. What struck me is how the process he describes, which is what can be observed in people, if you look closely, shows just how powerful a tool language can be, when used in full consciousness of what it means, and what it CAN do…..

People base their entire existence on a few words, and what those words mean to them. If someone else (say, a preacher?) is able to influence the person’s choice of the words that have that power, then that person becomes the willing slave of whomever supplies him with the words.

This is a subtle process, that operates below the level of consciousness that most folks are aware of; they don’t realize how they are being manipulated by the very words they use, into thinking along certain lines, and in certain ways, all of which benefit the manipulator in some way, much more than they do the one whose thoughts are being channeled.

“This is Daddy’s bedtime secret for today: Man is born broken. He lives by mending. The grace of God is glue.” — Eugene O’Neill

Mr. O’Neill was a decent playwright, but as a philosopher, he sucked, plain and simple. This is merely a parroting of the basic Christian dogma, and, as such, stands as a perfect example of how religious institutions tend to lie to their constituents….. I can say this because I have my own secret for today: Man is NOT born broken….. He is born as a blank slate; what is written upon that slate is only what he is taught to write, by other men. Since the first premise is false, the rest of the train of thought thus becomes irrelevant….You can easily see where it is just an attempt to get people to accept the untruths, and keep their patterns of thought within the boundaries drawn by dogma….

Sorry if such an idea is offensive, but, I don’t need to be “born again”, I did just fine the first time. I’m not broken. I’m not guilty of original sin, any more than is anyone else. That single concept, original sin, has been the most destructive idea Man has come up with in all of our long history, and, in my less-than-humble opinion, is therefore responsible for virtually ALL of the torture, warfare, and egregiously evil events perpetrated by religious fervor, of the last 3000 years.

I kid you not…. That simple lie, that we are all, somehow, for some insane, neurotic reason, born inherently sinful, and guilty of something, is pure hogwash, and is the most blatant falsehood to have been thought up, and perpetrated upon the rest of mankind, EVER!

What a ridiculous idea! To think that a newborn, of any species, should bear the guilt for an action performed before their birth, is just plain stupid, and self-serving. Of course, this doesn’t mention, that the act we are supposedly guilty of, is the acquisition of knowledge, an act which, to me, NOT something for which we should be punished, but rather deserve to be rewarded. Of course, knowledge is its own reward, so that really doesn’t matter, either….

But, in order to gain control over others, preachers have, since the beginning of history, tried to convince the rest of us that they are the only ones who have the right answer, all based on a bald-faced lie, and a false assumption….. And, since a large percentage of mankind is too lazy to think for themselves, or to risk thinking independently of others, THEY FALL FOR IT!  It almost makes me ashamed to be human, to be truthful….

But, we have dogs as our companions, and they love us, so we must not be ALL bad…. right? Right…. so, just follow your dog’s example, and just BE moral, don’t try to follow what others may tell you is moral. You’ll do a lot better, in life, and when it counts, after life…..

“Go back. Everything you need to know is in the first seven axioms.” ~~ Peruaosophy, Axiom #8, by gigoid

Today’s Pearl came together in a very odd way, but, it got done, so, I’m good with that…. Comfortable or not, it’s reasonably well written, and has some fairly decent thinking included, if not exactly overloaded with complete coherency…. So be it….. See you tomorrow, ffolkes….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest  Carole, Mark, and Theresa…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes,
I just sits.

gigoid the dubious


Charged with gluttonous stockpiling of salient rationalizations….


Oh, yay…. I’m home from the wars…. well, okay, from Texas…. and slept like a baby in my own bed, once the travel-buzz wore off long enough to sleep. Now, here I am, only a few hours later, up, and burning to write…. Okay, so I’m not burning up with literary fervor, either; I AM up, though, and at 5:30 AM there isn’t a whole lot else to do but write, so…. Now, don’t take that as putting y’all second-best, or that I’m settling for this; it’s just that my whole reason for being up at all is to write; otherwise, I’d gladly still be sawing logs in dreamland….

A word here about the day…. I always have a good day on Friday the 13th; something about being a triple Scorpio, or something, not that I put a lot of faith in astrology….. But, astrologers, as good con men and women always have to be, are good observers of human nature, and over the centuries have incorporated their observations into their “science” so that some of what they say, especially about how humans behave, is true…. or, at least, sounds true…. Otherwise, they couldn’t convince people that ALL of it is true, which is just ridiculous….. I mean, the basic law of conservation of energy puts the lie to astrology, which claims that the motions of the stars and planets determine the events of our lives, and our personality traits, which determine how we approach life…..

Even if one considers that to be true (a pretty fair stretch of the imagination, logic-wise….), it doesn’t account for the fact that in our Universe, physical law is such that, if it IS true, the opposite concept must also be true, to wit: the events of our lives, and our personalities, affect the motion of the planets and stars, equally as much as they affect us. The Universe exists in duality; symmetry must be maintained, in reality, though not in the human imagination…This is basic physical law in our space-time continuum, and not to be discounted, but, they don’t want to see that part of it, so they just ignore it…. Hmm…. sounds like a politician, doesn’t it?….

Sorry, it’s a bit early for shots at the BRC, especially when we’re still in the intro…. I know I’ve been ranting here a lot lately, but, that really is no excuse for rudeness…. Ah, what the hell, let’s go for it…. It’s not as if they’re not used to it, is it? Nope, and anyone with a thin skin should never go into politics anyway; there’s just too much name-calling and oneupmanship going on to allow anyone without a good, thick, rhinoceros-style epidermis to last for long….  Plus, it isn’t as if they listen much to what the peons say, anyway….

Okay, that’s enough for now…. I’m too glad to be home to be very nasty today, so I may skip a rant altogether…. We’ll see when I look at the news this morning, to see if there is anything new to report on the “spying on their own people” front, or the “let’s all get worked up over some asshole’s newest outrage, and start World War III” front…. both of which have dominated the news of late. I’m glad to see the danger of world-wide conflagration has receded a bit, thanks to some last-minute contortions, and a touch of common sense that somehow got worked into the whole issue, out of nowhere…. It was getting a bit scary there for a bit…. even the POTUS was, and is, leaning toward an idiotic response that goes against everything the public wants him to do….

SIGH…. sorry, I said I wasn’t going to rant, and there I went, straight into the same old story…. We’d best dive in soon, and start the search for some suitable pearls for today; I have a feeling I was getting lost there, and wouldn’t have found my way back any time soon, so, good thing I caught myself…. Hell, this is already getting out of hand, and, once again, we’re still only in the first section…. Well, I know the solution for THAT, anyway….

Shall we Pearl?…..

“C is for cookie, it’s good enough for me; oh cookie cookie cookie starts with C.” — Cookie Monster

Thankfully, I was right, for the moment…. I checked the headlines, and little of note is happening just now on the world’s stage, beyond some stupid remarks made by our Secretary of State (nothing unusual there….); that’s encouraging in that they are at least talking, and not bombing yet…. To relieve a bit of the heavy-handedness that has been seen, here and everywhere, of late, here is an old-school pearl, with the parameters left up to Smart Bee…. I just told it to look for stuff to make fun of stuffed shirts and closet bozos…..

“Before you have sex you have to be elected to a high government position.” — Zippy

“It’s better the world wonder why you *AREN’T* President.” — Smart Bee

“I think the mistake a lot of us make is thinking the state-appointed psychiatrist is our “friend.” — Deep Thoughts, by Jack Handey

“Truth exists. Only lies have to be invented.” — Georges Braque

“A drill is a tool. A hole is a solution.” — Smart Bee

“The United States has got some of the dumbest people in the world.  I want you to know that we know that.” — Ted Turner, media mogul, author, actor, and baseball team owner, — addressing international journalists, 1996

“When in doubt, think.” — Smart Bee

Damn! I love it when a plan comes together…. Hell, I like it when it only breathes hard by itself….    😆     No, really, though, thanks to Smart Bee, this turned out to be one of the best pearls in quite a while…. Well, I  think so….

I find myself lately wondering about motivation when I’m picking poems for this section, mostly because I don’t seem to know just what it is that makes me pick some poems…. Sometimes it is for the power of it, the breadth and width and height, and presence it creates; other times it is because it strikes a chord of beauty in my soul/spirit…. But, often, I just don’t know, and, moreover, don’t care…. This is one of those times, so, just enjoy the genius of this woman’s unique view….


The idiot bird leaps out and drunken leans
Atop the broken universal clock:
The hour is crowed in lunatic thirteens.
Out painted stages fall apart by scenes
While all the actors halt in mortal shock:
The idiot bird leaps out and drunken leans.

Streets crack through in havoc-split ravines
As the doomstruck city crumbles block by block:
The hour is crowed in lunatic thirteens.

Fractured glass flies down in smithereens;
Our lucky relics have been put in hock:
The idiot bird leaps out and drunken leans.

The monkey’s wrench has blasted all machines;
We never thought to hear the holy cock:
The hour is crowed in lunatic thirteens.

Too late to ask if end was worth the means,
Too late to calculate the toppling stock:
The idiot bird leaps out and drunken leans,
The hour is crowed in lunatic thirteens.

~~ Sylvia Plath ~~


“A promise must never be broken.” — Alexander Hamilton

It’s interesting to me that this statement is made by one of our country’s first politicians…. It was possible for him to utter such a thought, I suppose because, in a very real sense, they were unique politicians, unlike what we know as such today…. You see, most folks forget that most of the founding fathers didn’t start out as politicians…. They only became labeled as such because they took the responsibility for their fate, and went forth to change history….. Today, politicians are more closely defined and described by the Smart Bee quote I often use, from either Daniel Bowen’s Toxic Custarpedia, or Ambrose Bierce’s, “The Devil’s Dictionary”,  (I forget which, and am too lazy to go look…. but, it’s one of the two, for sure….) to wit:

Politics: from the Greek, “poly”, meaning “many”, and “tics”, meaning “blood-sucking insects”…. a most apt definition, if I do say so….

There is a corollary statement to this assertion by Mssr. Hamilton: I would say it is an obvious evolution of the concept of the inviolability of such moral laws. It says, simply, “If you can’t keep a promise, don’t make it.” In light of that, I can only say, not only do today’s version of politicians NOT display any knowledge of the above moral rule, they DO firmly believe in making promises they have no intention of keeping…. If anyone out there has an opposing view of this, please, please, say something that actually has evidence to back it up; it is common knowledge, among the people I know, that politicians will say anything to get people to vote for them, then have absolutely no memory of any such statements, once they are safely ensconced in office….

I’m not going to bore y’all with a long rant today, and I don’t think it will improve your day, or mine, for me to list a huge number of examples that DO provide evidence of the lies told by politicians in this country, or any other….. besides, all you have to do is go read a newspaper to get that list, anyway. Instead, I’m going to go old-school again, this time having Smart Bee look for humorous ways to drive this point home, or at least to a luxurious motel…. Or, in other words, I shall explain this by waving my hands about in an appropriate manner….

“And now am I, if a man should speak truly, little better than one of the wicked.” — William Shakespeare (1564-1616), King Henry IV– Act i, Sc. 2
(However, I am nothing, if not an honest man…. unlike SOME people I could name….)

“Anacharsis said a man’s felicity consists not in the outward and visible favours and blessings of Fortune, but in the inward and unseen perfections and riches of the mind.” — Plutarch (46-120 AD) — The Banquet of the Seven Wise Men, 11

“Bush?  OK, he’s experienced, but he’s never going to be a GREAT liar. He can hardly bamboozle Dan Rather.  How’s he going to do up against a bloodthirsty, power-mad dictator, like Margaret  Thatcher?” — A. Whitney Brown

“There is no sin but ignorance.” — Christopher Marlowe (1564-1593)

“If I could find a way to get [Saddam Hussein] out of there, even putting a contract out on him, if the CIA still did that sort of a thing, assuming it ever did, I would be for it.” — Richard M. Nixon

“Civil liberties are always safe as long as their exercise doesn’t bother anyone.” — New York Times editorial, 1-3-41

“Cato requested old men not to add the disgrace of wickedness to old age, which was accompanied with many other evils.” — Plutarch (46-120 AD) —

I think this is still a bit unclear, so, we’ll add one more, that will bring it all into perspective….

“Every decent man is ashamed of the government he lives under.” — H.L. Mencken

While searching for the pearls for the above section, the following pearls kept popping up to distract me…. Each of these is a real gem, of highest quality, but, they aren’t necessarily connected, other than by that same universal sameness of being absolutely true, and/or humorously logical…. or even logically humorous…. In short, they’re all perfect, in their own way…. I’m adding them in here today because I can….. It isn’t meant as torture, you know, but as a bonus round…. Regardless of all that, I hope you enjoy them, and pay heed to the wisdom herein….

“May the Forces of Evil become confused on the way to your house.” — George Carlin

“Experience has proved that some people indeed know everything.” — Russell Baker

How To Keep A Healthy Level Of Insanity:  4. Put your garbage can on your desk and label it “in”.

I am the mother of all things, and all things should wear a sweater.

“Imagine the Creator as a low comedian, and at once the world becomes explicable.” — H. L. Mencken (1880-1956)

The ruins of himself! now worn away
With age, yet still majestic in decay.

— Alexander Pope (1688-1744) — The Odyssey of Homer, Book xxiv, Line 271

” Again, Again! Again, again, even if we know the countryside of love, and the tiny churchyard with its names mourning, and the chasm, more and more silent, terrifying, into which the others dropped:  we walk out together anyway beneath the ancient trees, we lie down again, again, among the flowers, and face the sky.” — Rainer Maria Rilke

This is what happens when I lose my routine…. I get all blocked up; once it has an outlet, it pours out all over the place. I do hope none of it splashed on any of your good clothing…. There’s a lot here, I know, so let’s see if it’s worth the effort…. I’d say it will pass, though it IS somewhat lengthy…. (I do love understatement, don’t you?….) It’s certainly enough, and he who has enough is rich indeed…. To prevent any more damage to my mind, your mind, or the space-time continuum we share, or, indeed, any danger of same, I’ll stop now….

Y’all take care out there,
and May the Metaphorse be with you;
Blessed Be, dearest  Carole…
and everyone else, too…

When I works, I works hard.
When I sits, I sits loose.
When I thinks, I falls asleep.

Which is Why….

Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.