Tag Archives: Zippy the Pinhead

Salsa requires rhythm, and tight shoes……

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Ffolkes,
Gather ye round, children, and I will tell you a tale. We speak here today of days gone by, with love for memory, and hope for tomorrow. This tale is one of loss, and hope, and love, and fear. It is a tale of two humans, strong and brave, and the day they met……in the shadow of the future… Listen now, as the tale begins……
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“Life is full of surprises when you’re up th’ stream of consciousness without a paddle…” — Zippy the Pinhead

Having been in this position a number of times over the years, I can attest that Zippy hit this nail squarely on the head, driving it home with one swift blow. What I particularly like about this is that Zippy has shown us how to assimilate and accept our position when we find ourselves this far out of touch with our GPS, and how to best react to having fallen prey to our own foolishness. Long story short; this is the way it is, so either learn to keep the paddle in the canoe, learn how to make paddles from almost anything, or learn to enjoy new scenery.

All of us, or at least all of us who can admit to having made a mistake without going through all sort of contortions, have found ourselves in this body of water at one time or another. How long we stay there is entirely up to us. Many folks spend a day or two whining about it before they’ll condescend to admit they need help, then wait to be rescued. Others enter the state of Denial, where nothing is anybody’s fault, and I’m not lost anyway. These folks will spend an inordinate amount of time justifying why they aren’t looking for a new paddle, then borrow one from their neighbor, and never return it. Still others will maintain that this was where they intended to go in the first place, and insist that they are to be put ashore and left alone, so they can walk back to civilization without being seen. And a very few will look around, chuckle at their own ineptitude, and proceed to fashion a paddle out of nearby vegetation.

The difference between all of these folks is one of attitude. One can accept reality and deal, or one can fear it, and spend all their time finding ways to avoid dealing. So, when people tell me they think my attitude stinks, I just say to them, “I don’t have an attitude problem–it’s supposed to be like this.”, smile gently, and go merrily on my way……
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“There appears to be irrefutable evidence that the mere fact of overcrowding induces violence.” — Harvey Wheeler

Several days ago, I wrote a couple of paragraphs about overpopulation, wherein I made reference to experiments on rats that had been conducted that, in summary, concluded this exact point, to wit: overcrowding induces violence. Those experiments have also been performed with humans, and other animals, as the subjects, and all of them show the same characteristic when under the stress of overpopulation. Normal species behavioral patterns become disrupted, and unpredictability becomes the norm. Unfortunately, the word “irrefutable” continues to be called into question by fundamentalist religious mavens, political pundits on the extreme Right, and the usual complement of fat cats who believe they are immune to the problems afflicting the rest of society.

It’s not clear to me just why these folks prefer to bury their heads in the sand over this issue; it’s not as if the proponents of the concept are not willing to listen to argument, or adjust the theory in light of evidence. But those who would deny these “facts” will not listen, or even discuss, any alternative viewpoints, convinced as they are of their own infallibility. At least the rest of us can always say that we tried to share the Truth with them; we just can’t make them believe it…….
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Eat less and chew well.
Ride less and walk often.
Have fewer clothes and launder often.
Worry less and work harder.
Waste less time, and continue to learn.
Talk less and listen more.
Frown less and laugh often.
Speak less and act more.
Blame less and praise others.
Take less and give a hundred times over.
— Kenzo Futagi, describing the secrets of life.
— He lived well over a hundred years.

I like this for its simplicity. And for the valuable information shared by this gentleman, to which his age lends an air of credibility, proving its pertinence by evidence of his longevity. One could do worse than to take this and try to make it part of their own outlook on life. It’s pretty obvious that it can’t hurt…….
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I’m not sure, but he seems to be inordinately fond of beetles.
— J.B.S. Haldane, — when asked what has the study of biology had taught him about the Creator

— WHY GOD WILL NEVER GET TENURE AT ANY UNIVERSITY

1. Only published one book.
2. It was in Hebrew.
3. It had no references.
4. He did not publish it in referenced journals.
5. Some doubt He even wrote it Himself.
6. He is not known for His cooperative work.
7. Sure, He created the world, but what has He done lately?
8. He did not get permission from any review board to work with human subjects.
9. When one experiment went awry, He tried to cover it up by drowning all the subjects.
10. When sample subjects do not behave as predicted, He deletes the whole sample.
11. He rarely comes to class-just tells His students to read the Book.
12. It is rumored that He sometimes lets His Son teach the class.
13. Although He only has 10 requirements, His students often fail His tests.
14. He expelled His first two students for learning.
15. His office hours were infrequent and usually held on a mountain top.
— faculty members at Kansas State University — instructors at Allen County Community College

Not being one to gild a lily……onward….
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Happiness is a state of mind.  Not happy?  Change your mind.

I’ve studied a lot of different religions and philosophies during my lifetime, and have naturally come to some conclusions about what I’ve learned. One of them is this: almost all religions and philosophies have points of similarity, where the beliefs of one are echoed in the other. This is one of those ideas that all espouse, and can be recognized by the very simplicity that lends it infinite depth. This is such a basic concept that its subtlety makes it difficult to comprehend. “Not happy? Change your mind.” How brilliantly simple this is! So simple it’s hard to assimilate.

Like all of the most profound truths, this concept is so simple that it appears complex. But it is one of the most powerful of all the tools we humans possess, a strong ally in our struggle to achieve contentment and inner peace in life; utterly simple, and utterly powerful. The ability to change ourselves is in reality the only real power we have in this world; the ability to do so allows us the freedom of choice, in a universe that is completely indifferent to our comfort, or to any of our needs. With this power, we can avoid a lot of pain and anguish in life, the kind of pain that comes with being forced into a certain pattern of behavior by the demands of reality. Instead, we can assume control of how we feel, and how we react to difficulties in our lives. It’s good to have some kind of feeling of control over our own fate; it’s not something that is included in the package we are issued at birth……
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“… not picked from the leaves of any author, but bred amongst the weeds and tares of mine own brain.”– Thomas Browne

“An ill-favoured thing, sir, but mine own.”  — William Shakespeare (1564-1616), As You Like It — Act v, Sc. 4

Today’s Pearls of Virtual Wisdom were inspected by the quality control committee in my brain, and found to be acceptable for publication. The two quotes above these lines are your guarantee that all of the comments herein were created in my own feverish little collection of grey matter; the universe at large takes no responsibility for any consequences resulting from the consumption of these concepts, and urges you to read with caution. Ideas can be dangerous in the hands of the wicked or the ignorant among us…..always consult a professional before ingesting any information with which you are unfamiliar.

“Well, it just seemed wrong to cheat on an ethics test.” — Calvin

Enough tom-foolery for one morning. I’m gonna go see what kind of trouble I can get into today. Y’all take care out there…..

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Dozer

Kowabunga!

Taking the long road home…..

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Ffolkes,
I would guess that any gentle readers out there today will expect some sort of comment here on Christmas. Okay, here it is. It’s Christmas Day. Have a great time, and share whatever joy you receive; it will recreate itself in the one with whom you share. Today is a good day for that sort of activity, and I support that wholeheartedly. Whatever your preferred belief system may be, or not be, I wish you peace, and prosperity, and life without fear…….


In keeping with the spirit of tolerance during the holiday season, I’ll try to keep it light and short today. There’ll be a couple extras, because I believe Instructions for Life #1, which says, “Always give more than is expected, and do it cheerfully.” So there you have it…..or more accurately, here we go….hang on tight!…..
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And though Home is a name, a word, it is a strong one; stronger than magician ever answered to, in the strongest conjuration.” Charles Dickens

Therefore, those whose sense of self is Home are logically the possessors of very strong magic, which is often mistaken for Faith, or Fate, but in reality is Knowledge, and Will. Whether one believes in an entity powerful enough to create universes, or accepts their perceptions which provide evidence of another explanation for the nature of reality, one has to be grateful that both ideologies include the existence of coffee ice cream with caramel swirls, simple summertime dresses on beautiful young women, chocolate, puppies, and kittens.

I can truthfully, and thankfully, say that I have experienced all of these in one day, on more than one occasion. Of course, on some of those days, it was peach sherbet, exotic evening gowns on older women, chocolate, puppies, and a romantic fire. No matter.  Each one possesses the power to create in us that ineffable surety that all is right with the world, so who needs the guilt involved in worrying about why they exist? Just have a good time staying Home…..
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There are places I remember
all my life, though some have changed,
some forever, not for better,
some have gone and some remain.

All these places had their moments
with lovers and friends I still can recall.
Some are dead and some are living.
In my life I’ve loved them all.– the Beatles

Once I was asked to describe my life in six words. I thought for only a moment before it came to me; Looked for Love, Found It Everywhere. The best part of this, in my mind, is that it’s pretty much true. Not to say I haven’t known or met any assholes, or others of the ilk in my time. But, for the most part, I’ve found that if one leaves oneself open to it, love will enter, and make itself at home. Not always comfortably, and not always without turmoil, but always welcome, love has graced my life each time we meet.

Yes, there are a lot of fools and assholes out there, and they make life difficult at times, what with their misplaced sense of entitlement, and their ubiquitous negativity. They’re out there too, but one learns to deal with them, or suffers accordingly; I prefer to deal. I’ve found that just a few moments with them, reading from the Book of Righteousness, with gusto, and they begin to walk a path that is straighter and not as wide…..you gotta love ’em, they’re just so bloody ignorant that it takes some persuasion to make them more amenable to human interaction….which is pretty cool, once one learns how to relate to others without always trying to maintain the upper hand, or manipulate for personal profit. Most folks are pretty nice people, down in their heart of hearts; we all need to give each other a chance to allow that to show to the outside world……
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“As he said in Machiavel, omnes eodem patre nati, Adam’s sons, conceived all and born in sin, etc. “We are by nature all as one, all alike, if you see us naked; let us wear theirs and they our clothes, and what is the difference?” — Robert Burton – The Anatomy of Melancholy, Part ii, Sect. 2, Memb. 2

OMG, can you just visualize Newt Gingrich nude, standing in classic hunter’s pose, with his foot on the piled corpses of child workers, smoking a big cigar and wearing a bigger grin, and a rifle with a scope balanced on his hip? I almost donated my dinner to the porcelain throne when this unfortunate image formed in my mind…….talk about scaring yourself!

But if we can get past the oh-so-frightening images such a concept brings with it, we see the veracity of the Burton’s assertion. What is the difference between one man and the next? As related, we are all as one, with the same basic structure and function. To my way of thinking, what makes the difference between people is their Will, or their Won’t. People mostly choose one or the other at an early age, and stick with it throughout their lives.

What’s your choice? Will you live with honor, dignity, and compassion? Or won’t you face the world, instead pulling back and observing from afar, never to join with others without pain and effort. The choice a person makes is completely their own, and responsibility for the consequences rests solely upon the one who chooses. Choose well……
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In a literature class, the students were given an assignment to write a short story involving all the important ingredients – Nobility, Emotion, Sex, Religion and Mystery.  One student allegedly handed in the following story: My god! cried the duchess.  I’m pregnant.  Who did it?

No profound thinking here; I just thought it was clever, and deeper than it seems. The young person who came up with this little gem is most likely be writing best sellers now……and deservedly so……
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“Capitalism did not arise because capitalists stole the land, but because it was more efficient than feudalism. It will perish because it is not merely less efficient than socialism, but actually self-destructive.” — J. B. S. Haldane

One can only hope that in its’ death throes, capitalism doesn’t thrash about so severely that the negative effects  on the survivors cannot be overcome. Can’t bring myself to be very optimistic, considering the severe objections most human institutions have to dying. They tend to fight tooth and nail to hang on to any vestige of their former glory, never knowing or being able admit to their own fatal flaw. The flaw? Capitalism requires constant growth and movement; like a shark, if growth and forward motion stops, it begins to drown, and feed upon itself, crashing and burning quickly.

But capitalists believe there will always be new markets, selling new products,  and there will always be more resources to create the products to be consumed by those markets. But the sad fact is, the available resources are not infinite, and will not support continuous unchecked growth; they are finite, and once they are gone, they won’t be back. This simple reality is that resources are essential to the functioning of any society, but only if their finite restrictions are observed, and if they are regarded as precious enough to be husbanded and cared for in sustainable cyclical processes, that encourage and enable the resources to be renewed as needed, and no more. Capitalism cannot do that…..
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Will Rogers never met Rush Limbaugh.

I’m pretty sure I would give serious money to be around to see those two meet. Can you imagine if both were on Twitter? It would be truly inspiring, I think, to see how Mr. Rogers would have reacted to some of Rush’s more egregious statements. As a matter of fact, I believe I will make it a project, to research material from both, and find appropriate selected statements on the same, or similar person, event, idea, whatever. I’m sure I can find some doozies…(is that word still legal? does anybody still understand it?) Okay, I can find some fine examples….no, too tame. I can find some flat out funny stuff. That’ll do for now. Actually, we’ll just amend it to, I can find some. Good enough…..look for that on a website near you soon!….
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And yet, as angels in some brighter dreams
Call to the soul when man doth sleep,
So some strange thoughts transcend our wonted themes,
And into glory peep.
— Henry Vaughan (1621-1695)
— They are all gone

As I’ve said before, I love poetry, and only wish I had the ability to create it well. I can do it, but it always comes out stiff, and without spark. I would dearly love to be able to put words together in such a way that they arrow straight into the heart of the reader, and taking the mind on a fantastic trip through fields of esoterica, inspiring and fulfilling as it pleases. Alas, it is not within me to do so. Fortunately, there are a lot of folks out there who can, and do write it well; they all have my complete admiration, and my gratitude for existing…….I like this one for its imagery, and its’ potent depths…..all in four short lines. Amazing!…..
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“While my BRAINPAN is being refused service in BURGER KING,  Jesuit priests are DATING CAREER DIPLOMATS!!” — Zippy the Pinhead

Good grief, this is tragic! Something must be done! Hand me that copy of the Who’s Who, and call the A Team! They’re the only ones who can save the damsel in distress/the oppressed townfolk/the old buddy’s daughter’s brave but outnumbered boyfriend’s charity/all life as we know it (choose one), without ever drawing a single drop of blood, or striking any living creature at all with any of their 20,000 rounds fired! Oh, and they’ll build a tank to use while they’re at it; we can always use it later to visit our Congressman in Washington D.C. Next week, we can watch the reruns with a bunch of popcorn drenched in cholesterol-free butter……
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That’s probably enough for one morning. I do have to watch myself, as I’ll tend to just keep going, and going, and going……when I get into the Zone, time and the outside world fade away. Lots of new projects going on at my house, so I’d best get started on the rest of the day, holiday or no. It’s been real, and y’all take care out there……

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.
gigoid
Dozer

Kowabunga!

Spats and Zoot Suits…..

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Ffolkes,
Well, here we are again. This could get ugly today; my head is using every trick it knows to keep from functioning this morning, and that can have a deleterious effect on the Pearls. Then again, just as often, what comes out can also show signs of actual rational thought, with a occasional witty turn of phrase…..either way, we’d best get started….
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“If I have any beliefs about immortality, it is that certain dogs I have known will go to heaven, and very, very few persons.” — James Thurber

This one is pretty straight forward, and is a sentiment that I share completely. I don’t think I’ve ever met a dog that didn’t meet the criteria to get into heaven; the only time a dog behaves badly is when they have learned ill-manners from their human.  And really, not much more can be said on this topic. It is for sure and for certain that it would take a lot of saintly activity in the human arena before I will have much respect for people; most folks don’t think much at all, which leaves them wide open to being manipulated by others. And the ones that do think at all very seldom think about anything beyond their own desires. A dog’s whole purpose in life is centered on the humans they live with, and learning how to please their alleged masters is their primary desire. People can learn a lot from dogs regarding ethical behavior; I sometimes wonder which one is really the dominant species….. or, at least the most honorable……
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“Is this the region, this the soil, the clime,”
Said then the lost Archangel, “this the seat
That we must change for Heaven, this mournful gloom
For that celestial light? Be it so, since he
Who is now sovereign can dispose and bid
What shall be right: farthest from him is best,
Whom reason hath equaled, force hath made supreme
Above his equals. Farewell, happy fields,
Where joy forever dwells! Hail, horrors! hail,
Infernal World! and thou, profoundest Hell,
Receive thy new possessor – one who brings
A mind not to be changed by place or time.
A mind is its own place, and in itself
Can make a Heaven of Hell, a Hell of Heaven.
What matter where, if I be still the same,
And what should I be, all but less than he
Whom thunder hath made greater? Here at least
We shall be free; the Almighty hath not built
Here for his envy, will not drive us hence;
Here we may reign secure, and, in my choice,
To reign is worth ambition, though in Hell:
Better to reign in Hell than serve in Heaven.”
— John Milton, “Paradise Lost”

This passage is probably the best known part of Milton’s Paradise Lost; just about everyone has heard the last line. It’s here merely because it is so beautifully written; it has been commented on enough in the last couple hundred years since it was penned, so I’m sure my take isn’t necessary. Balancing precariously and bravely on the edge between poetry and prose, one is given the impression of power, ambition gone mad, and unbearable sadness. I had intended to include a different piece of genius here, but the only copy I could find was written in invisible ink…..so this will have to suffice….
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“He should not vow to walk in the dark, who has not seen the nightfall.” — Elrond

I was going to write more about this; it’s pretty deep in some respects. But it is also merely a fancier way to say, “Don’t make promises you can’t keep.” So we’ll pick something new to go in this slot. Hang on, be right back…..

I feel like one
Who treads alone
Some banquet-hall deserted,
Whose lights are fled,
Whose garlands dead,
And all but he departed.
— Thomas Moore (1779-1852) — Oft in the Stilly Night

I often feel this way, especially when I start thinking about the course of human society in today’s world. I just don’t see how we can survive without some major changes taking place, and nobody of any significance to the rest of the world is singing that tune. It seems to me that 99% of humanity is wandering around, focused on completing their life’s agenda, which includes such thrilling goals as “he who dies with the most toys, wins…” or “how many people can I screw over today?”, while concurrently pursuing those goals through policies and procedures that are killing the planet.  It’s enough to drive a man to drink……or buy a gun…..
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The Bluebird of Happiness long absent from his life,  Ned is visited by the Chicken of Depression. — Gary Larson

This is the caption from a Gary Larson cartoon; he creates the widely syndicated “Far Side”. This particular line was in the SF Chronicle sometime in early 1988. At that time, I was attending the California Culinary Academy, raising two kids, dealing with an emotionally volatile wife, commuting 120+ miles/day to go to school, juggling close-to-the-edge finances; in school, I was acting as the assistant to the Maitre d’Hotel, and working eight hour shifts after school to bring in some cash. The day this cartoon appeared, I had gone to an interview for a waiter’s job at the Fairmont Hotel, and had my car towed away by the SFPD during the interview. I was NOT a happy camper.

But, it all got better when one of the administrative assistants brought this cartoon to my attention while I was directing a class of student waiters in setting up the dining room for dinner. She came up to me, said, “Ned, I think you should see this,” and handed me the paper, folded to show the cartoon. I looked at the picture, of some dumpy guy sitting on a bed in a run-down room, and a chicken in the window. The above caption was so perfect, so personal, I literally fell to the floor with laughter, where I stayed for a full minute, giggling uncontrollably. It was such a wonderful relief to get all that angst and frustration out, and to enjoy being able to laugh again at myself; it’s a moment that will always be with me, always ready to make me smile, and help me to remember that things could always be worse…..
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“I’m totally DESPONDENT over the LIBYAN situation and the price of CHICKEN..” — Zippy the Pinhead

Me too!….. 🙂 That’s all ffolkes…..I’m all out of creativity for the nonce (love that word). I could write a paragraph or two, using this as a springboard, but I’m tired, and my brain wants to stop. Far be it from me to ever argue with myself….what a waste of time! I always know who’s going to win……
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Okay, I made this up last night. It’s going to be my new, first choice insult/curse. We all need one of these now and again, right? Feel free to borrow it, should you happen to encounter someone in your daily routine who makes you want to bite them. This is much classier, and won’t get you arrested…..”May Beelzebub’s personal imp use your toothbrush to clean his nails without telling you, until AFTER you brush your teeth…….”    Eeuuww! I think it works, how ’bout y’all? Meantime, y’all take care out there……

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Dozer

Kowabunga!

Fading signs of superficial interest

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Ffolkes,
Though I arise to meet the day with polite interest, it does not always return the favor. Makes me want to start the day with a rant, so have a care this morning; these Pearls may be a bit surly……
“What happens if a big asteroid hits Earth? Judging from realistic simulations involving a sledge hammer and a common laboratory frog, we can assume it will be pretty bad.” — Dave Barry

Global warming, along with dissolution of the ozone layer, has caused a dramatic increase in serious weather extremes all over the world, and the evidence that these events are being caused by pollution that mankind has created is overwhelming. There is no doubt whatsoever in the minds of 99.9% of the world’s leading scientists that this is the case; the only naysayers have direct ties to religious organizations, who care not about the evidence. And unfortunately, there are still politicians out there who are so tightly tied to the money they receive from big oil companies, car manufacturers, and industrialists, as well as being influenced by their religious fundamentalism, that they profess their doubts that the evidence is correct, or label it as unproven theory. They are so intent on hiding their heads in the sand, in order to continue lining their pockets, they will say anything to delay the imposition of any restrictions on their right to pollute. They have no thought for the future, beyond how they can turn it to their purposes. The concept of giving up their profit is so foreign to them, they cannot even put it aside to confront their own impending demise, preferring the ostrich’s patented method to altruism, or even realism. I can see much conflict in the coming years, as the folks who want to keep on living begin to fight it out with those who would merrily send us all to hell…….

“It’s the RINSE CYCLE!!  They’ve ALL IGNORED the RINSE CYCLE!!” — Zippy the Pinhead
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Poets go from bad to verse.

And punsters should all go straight to jail, without passing Go, and without collecting $200. Sorry, couldn’t help it……next time I put one this sad out there, feel free to throw rotten fruit……

[Clear the throat]
Oh freddled gruntbuggly
Thy micturations are to me
As plurdled gabbleblotchits on a lurgid bee

Groop I implore thee
my foonting turlingdromes
And hooptiously drangle me
with crinkly thy blindlewurdles,

Or I will rend thee In the gobberwarts
With my blurglecruncheon, see if I don’t! — The Hitch Hiker’s Guide to the Galaxy

I rest my case…..
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“If people are good only because they fear punishment, and hope for reward, then we are a sorry lot indeed.” — Albert Einstein

If Albert were still with us, I’m afraid he would be shaking his head in wonder and disappointment at the sorry state to which mankind has brought itself. Like petty children, the powers that be in the world continue to run around chasing after the almighty dollar, completely ignoring how their actions are killing us all. They don’t care, about other people, or even themselves; it isn’t possible for any creature to act so much against their own interests unless they are in a state of complete denial regarding any input they receive that is not to their benefit. If it won’t sell, they won’t buy it, and the rest of us will pay the price. How much more are you willing to put up with? As for myself, I am done with their intransigence in the face of reality, and will be spending all my not inconsiderable talents to poking fun at their idiotic pronouncements, and calling them out for their perpetual lies…..
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“When an old person dies, a library is lost.” — Tommy Swann

My mom’s library closed about a month ago. Using that language to say it will hopefully keep me from breaking down as I type, as it is slightly less pointed than other expressions might be. But it’s hard to accept that I can’t call her any more when I forget a relative’s birthday, or to ask which of her great-great grandkids was the latest addition to the tribe. She passed away not too long after her 90th birthday this year, and the pain not only hasn’t passed, but comes up to grab me at odd times; it’s hard on the equilibrium to say the least. But I like this quote, because it is a reminder that we should value the lives and experiences of our elders; they have a lot of untapped knowledge and experience that anyone younger cannot possibly know of. It should always be treasured, for you never know when they will be gone……
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Happy who in his verse can gently steer
From grave to light, from pleasant to severe.
— Nicholas Boileau-Despreaux (1636-1711)
— The Art of Poetry, Canto i, Line 75

This is the goal. This is what I’m shooting for every time I sit down to write. I want to write so well that the reader forgets he/she is reading; the words become reality. With the proper care, and enough heart, what I write should bring the reader into my world, to feel what I feel; I want them to hurt as much as I, and to experience even more joy.

Having tried my hand at poetry many times in the past, I tend to stick to prose. It may not be much better, but it is much more suited to my writing skills. Fortunately, I find that there is no shortage of poets to be found on the internet, many of whom really impress me with their work. I can always sublimate my urge to create poetry into enjoyment of consuming it; it always lends some inspirational tones to what I may compose myself. That can only be a good thing……
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Some mornings I just want to keep going, and going, and…..and could easily spend half the day right here, finding and commenting on brilliant little snippets of literature. And since I have no other pressing commitments, I could conceivably do so. But then I’d have too many episodes finished ahead of time, and these morning gurgitations (they ARE original, for the most part, thus not re-gu….etc) would lose some of their freshness. It might also lead to increased proofing, the bane of all writers, so we’ll just call it a day, and go out into the Big Blue Room for awhile….y’all take care out there…..
—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.
gigoid
Dozer

Kowabunga!

Like that, but different…..

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Ffolkes,
Due to circumstances that are completely within my control, I have  lot to do today, so I will be using the old format for this morning’s offering, with just a short intro, and then some mighty fine virtual food for thought. Between fighting off depression, scratching for change, and juggling creditors, I have neglected my homework, which only hurts me, so there ya go. I sleep a lot, probably because when I’m asleep, I feel more in control of my life. Pitiful, isn’t it? Ah well, life is Change, and this situation too shall pass in time. I’ve procrastinated almost as far as I can with the homework, though I’m sure I’ll come up with at least one or two ways to put it off before I actually get to it. I’m creative in that respect, if in no other…….anywho, here are today’s Pearls, all of which can be found in Category “Finest Kind Stuff”………

“To be “matter of fact” about the world is to blunder into fantasy…. and dull fantasy at that, as the real world is strange and wonderful.” — Robert A. Heinlein

“All the knowledge in the world is not wisdom”. — Albert Einstein

“Invisible Pink Unicorns are beings of great spiritual power. We know this because they are capable of being invisible and pink at the same time. Like all religions, the Faith of the Invisible Pink Unicorns is based upon both logic and faith. We have faith that they are pink; we logically know that they are invisible because we can’t see them.” — Steve Eley
(Sound familiar? Has a certain Tea Party ring to it, no?…..)

You ‘d scarce expect one of my age
To speak in public on the stage;
And if I chance to fall below
Demosthenes or Cicero,
Don’t view me with a critic’s eye,
But pass my imperfections by.
Large streams from little fountains flow,
Tall oaks from little acorns grow.
— David Everett (1769-1813)
— Lines written for a School Declamation

The wages of sin are high but you get your money’s worth.

“Please come home with me…  I have Tylenol!!” — Zippy the Pinhead

Well, there you go, Ollie, another fine mess…..and in Technicolor too!  Y’all take care out there…..

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Dozer

Kowabunga!

Lime biscuits with tea and sympathy….

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4

Ffolkes,
Yesterday’s discussion of the nature of Reality was fun, as usual. This morning I’d like to comment on another aspect of the subject that is quite as important as understanding the inner nature of what is real. I’m speaking of the concept of perspective, a purely subjective stance that is partially responsible for determining our reaction to what we perceive. If, for example, one’s perspective in the morning is measured pre-coffee, the results would be rather on the negative side. Post-coffee, the world at large assumes a warmer, friendlier tone, and a more positive approach to deciding the day’s activities is enabled. Our perspective is a key feature of our attitude, and its degree of plus or minus can make a huge difference in how we react to our perceptions, and in how we decide on whether or not to act, and whether that act is one of defense, or one of attack. Or any other type of action that falls between the two extremes.


Since perspective is subjective, it follows that it is within our powers to make changes in that perspective. Our reasoning mind can persuade other facets of our nature to view data in varying ways. We can set up filters, to keep unwanted factors out of play, to block out unwanted perceptions. We can set up rule systems to categorize incoming perceptions into certain channels that are pre-set to process that type of data. We can put on rose-colored glasses, if we wish, and perceive everything as positive. Or we can put on black lenses, and sink into neurosis; this is unfortunately an easy method to start and maintain, as it rewards negativity, becoming an ever-stronger, repetitive cycle that ultimately leads to madness and despair. Negativity is an insidious trap; it seems so useful at first, keeping one sheltered from possibly harmful events. But over time, it becomes obsession, dragging one down into depression, a very deep hole from which to climb.


It becomes easy to see that self-examination is important; introspection on the subject of ourselves can determine the shape and color, and the emotional content and effect, of our life’s events, and can be a powerful ally in the daily battle with the forces of an uncaring, indifferent Universe. Holding our mind’s course to a straight and narrow path can be tricky, to say the least. The Universe has a lot of tricks up its sleeves, and isn’t afraid to use them on us. Staying positive in one’s outlook is a powerful weapon, as is negativity. The bad news is that it is all our choice. The good news is that it is all our choice……choose well…..

Reality can be beaten with enough imagination.

“An ancient buddha said, ‘Mountains are mountains; waters are waters.’ These words do not mean mountains are mountains; they mean mountains are mountains.” — Dogen

“Love doesn’t just sit there, like a stone, it has to be made, like bread; re-made all the time, made new.  — Ursula K. LeGuin, The Lathe of Heaven

But Memory blushes at the sneer,
And Honor turns with frown defiant,
And Freedom, leaning on her spear,
Laughs louder than the laughing giant.
— Oliver Wendell Holmes (1809-1894)
— A Good Time going

“A man never discloses his own character so clearly as when he describes another’s.” — Jean Paul Richter

“Wow!  Look!!  A stray meatball!!  Let’s interview it!’ — Zippy the Pinhead

Zippy always makes a good point at which to call a halt to these pieces; his unbridled enthusiasm is hard to resist. Plus, his comments always seem to add just the right touch as counterpoint to the rest of the Pearls. Tres bien!….. y’all take care out there….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Dozer

Kowabunga!

Buses you can ride, or not…

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1

Ffolkes,

It is once again Sunday, and it looks as if we’ll get some rain. And talking about the weather is pretty much a useless pastime, but it’s all I’ve got today. I am, for some reason, exhausted, and I just got up. I believe I know the reason for that, though, and will have to take care of it some day very soon. Meanwhile, I’m going to just give you the Pearls today, and they can stand on their own. I’ll write tomorrow, I promise….

“A good many dramatic situations begin with screaming.” — Barbarella

“Communication is next to impossible with someone who has no doubts.” — Limon

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I —
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
— Robert Frost, The Road Not Taken

“Each has his past shut in him like the leaves of a book known to him by his heart, and his friends can only read the title.” — Virginia Woolf

Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

“On the other hand, life can be an endless parade of TRANSSEXUAL QUILTING BEES aboard a cruise ship to DISNEYWORLD if only we let it!!” — Zippy the Pinhead

Yes, if only we will let it, life can be what it is…..y’all take care out there….

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Just Dozer

Kowabunga!

A swift passage to melancholy…

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2

Ffolkes,
I once read an article or essay somewhere that made the claim that when we cry or feel deeply sad over the death of a loved one, we are really crying for ourselves, not for the departed. In at least one respect, that is true; the person who has passed away is no longer suffering, and presumably has gone on to a better place, so in truth we ought to be happy, not sad. But we are sad, because it hurts to know that one in whom we have placed our trust and love will not be around anymore for us to be with, to talk to, to enjoy. So in that sense we are crying for ourselves, in lamentation for lost love. But, unlike the author of the piece I was reading, I believe that is okay. It is, if nothing else, a completely human reaction to feel pain at a loss, and to a certain extent our reaction may be called selfish; no one can deny that selfishness is purely human. But it is more than merely selfish, because humans are never just one thing at a time. We also feel our loss in other ways, and with other feelings. There is relief, for the ending of whatever pain the loved one may have been experiencing. There may be guilt, too, for taking the presence of the loved one for granted, or for not telling them they were loved. All of these differing reactions, and the many more I haven’t mentioned, only prove our humanity more, for in spite of what some would have us believe, we are not simple creatures. The relationships we build throughout our lives are held together with a myriad of feelings, all relating to the other person and the time we have shared with them. Our feelings don’t occur alone; there are always more than only one, for when they occur, they engender other feelings, which will then cause another, and another, and so on.


These thoughts, and a million more, have been circling around in my head for about a day now, since my brother called yesterday to let me know that our mother had passed away at about 1:00 pm. It was not unexpected; she was 90 years-old, and had been in the hospital for a week after suffering a massive stroke. I am sad, of course, and will miss her very much, but in truth, I don’t think it has really hit me yet. When my father passed away, 20 or more years ago, the full reaction didn’t come until weeks later, and I have the feeling that in this instance, it may be some time before I can grieve fully. It’s just so hard to accept their absence; there is never any real belief they are gone until one day, all one’s feelings just crash in at once. So, I have that to go through yet, which is okay by me. I have enough problems just now, and can’t really afford to fall apart at present.


Today’s Pearls were picked out before I heard about my Mom, and so have no particular point in light of that. They are. however, well able to make their own point…..

“A ‘No’ uttered from deepest conviction is better and greater than a ‘Yes’ merely uttered to please, or what is worse, to avoid trouble.” — Mahatma Gandhi

“He who is most slow in making a promise, is the most faithful in the performance of it.” — Rousseau

“Here I am in the POSTERIOR OLFACTORY LOBULE but I don’t see CARL SAGAN  anywhere!!” — Zippy the Pinhead

“If you never assume importance you never lose it.” — Lao-tzu

“I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little death that brings total oblivion. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and
through me and turn my inner eye to follow its path. When the fear is gone, there will be nothing. Only I will remain.” — The Litany Against Fear (Frank Herbert, -Dune-, 1965)

Before you speak, just remember that you will not be asked to explain what you did not say!

Such a fine group of Pearls really deserves some witty or profound remark in response, but I’m afraid that may be asking too much of my Muse today, so we’ll have to make do with this…..y’all take care out there….and don’t forget to tell the people you love that they are appreciated. Ya never know when they might not be there any more to tell…..

—
Sometimes I sits and thinks,
and sometimes
I just sits.

gigoid

Dozer

Kowabunga!